LAST SCION COMPANION STORY
by savannah0707
Summary: THIS IS A COMPANION STORY TO 'LAST SCION'. IT ISN'T REQUIRED THAT YOU READ 'ls' FIRST, BUT IT IS A GOOD IDEA. THIS COMPANION STORY FOLLOWS BELLAMY PEACE, GUARDIAN TO JESSE ZEKLOS, A MOROI ROYAL. BELLAMY IS FACED WITH A DECISION WHEN NEWS OF A LOST LOVE IS HEARD. SHE WILL HAVE TO FACE HIM AND ASK THE QUESTION: WHY? WHY DID HE LEAVE? WHY DOES HE BLAME HER?
1. Chapter 1

**PART 1**

 **READERS: THIS IS A COMPANION PIECE TO 'LAST SCION'. IF YOU HAVE NOT READ THAT, MUCH OF THIS STORY MAY BE CONFUSING.**

 **THE WAS A LOT THAT I EITHER LEFT OUT OF 'LAST SCION' OR EDITED OUT. I HAVE BEEN WORKING ON THESE PIECES FOR THE LAST MONTHS, AND DECIDED IT IS BETTER TO WRITE THEM UP IN A NEW STORY. I HOPE IT IS AS ENJOYED AS LS. AS ALWAYS, HAPPY READING.**

 _I knew what I needed to do. I knew there was no other choice. So why was it so difficult to actually do it? I no longer wanted this life. Did I? No, I decided. I'd made my decision, and needed to stick to it. I had watched too many people get hurt lately. This was not the path I wanted to continue down._

 _For the past week, I had been staying and "working" in Switzerland. I was mourning my Mason who had just been killed by Strigoi when I received a surprising phone call from Bridgette. She was scheduled to escort a few royals to Court after the latest string of attacks, and she was asking for help. She was asking for my help._

" _I need someone I can trust." She pulled at the right strings, knowing that if she truly needed me, I would help._

 _Bridgette informed me upon my arrival to Switzerland that the Drozdov family had gone directly into hiding after the attack on them and their Guardians. After the Badica massacre, this was the only option. It was in fact Bridgette who secretly whisked the survivors into safety, in Switzerland. She was then tasked with accompanying Lord and lady Drozdov back to one Court or the other, to meet with Rhys Bowen and Tatiana Ivashkov. I was asked somewhat politely to stay and guard Aaron Drozdov. Aaron was having brutal nightmares, and Bridgette was under the impression that I could somehow help the young royal. The attack had done a fair amount of damage to Aaron, and when he was not waking in a screaming cold sweat, he refused to sleep at all._

 _After a week, I was sad to go, sad to leave Aaron, and far more conflicted about the firm decision I had made. Hours after Bridgette returned with Aaron's parents, I requested a short meeting with Larisa Drozdov, to which she immediately agreed. I made myself walk through the door, wondering if I was making the right decision._

" _Guardian Pearce." The woman greeted me with more pleasantness to her tone this time. It was a change that I was not expecting from her, shaking my resolve momentarily. "You asked to see me. I would like to thank you for your service to my family." Larisa Drozdov spoke as I entered the room._

" _Thank you for seeing me lady Drozdov. I would like to thank you for allowing me to prove my skills to you and your family."_

 _I stood at attention as close to the door as I could manage without suspicion, while studying any new reaction Aaron's mother might have._

" _Your aunt speaks very highly of you and your abilities as a Guardian." Larisa sat down at the desk separating the two of us. "I dare say, even she may not be aware of the full scope of greatness within you." She complimented._

" _I think Aaron just needed someone that he could talk to; someone in the same boat. However, any work done this week is credited to him." I replied, setting the ring box down on the table between me and Larisa. I watched as she glanced at the box, lifting her eyes to me, and picked it up. Her eyes seemed to smile lightly as she opened the jewelry box, allowing herself to understand the significance of its return to her._

 _As I watched her reaction, each shifting expression she showed, I felt weaker. My emotions, good and bad for Aaron were getting the better of me. I thought about all of the repercussions of my decision, and for the first time, I hated the fact that Bridgette had asked me for my help. Tears sprang to my eyes and I quickly blinked them away, wiping them from my cheeks as they quietly fell._

" _You are much too humble, Guardian Pearce, but we must respect your decision. Thank you for breathing life back into my son." Larisa said, as I backed away, exiting the room._

 _Once I had returned the exquisite sapphire ring offered to me the day before, effectively answering Aaron's question, I felt no better. I felt worse. I was hurting even more and I was probably going to hurt him more. I was packing when I heard the knock on the cabin door. Bridgette's return with lord and lady Drozdov meant of course that I was going to be on my way back to Court. My orders to return to Guardian Court arrived shortly after Bridgette did. I was no longer needed. I had done my job, and would return to a state of limbo soon enough._

 _Making my way to the door, part of me hoped that after returning the ring, Aaron might let things between us go. The other part of me knew that too much had happened and been said to walk away. I unlocked the door, allowing him to enter and say what he would. Instead, Aaron walked in, closing the door behind him, surprising me as he followed. He waited until I stopped outside of the bedroom before his arms reached out, circling around my shoulders._

" _You're leaving." He sounded so sad again. "You won't consider…"_

" _You know I have to go." I stood strong. "You know why I can't stay."_

 _After offering me the sapphire ring, and all of the duties that came with accepting it, Aaron and I had a lengthy and late talk about why I might return it, It was not mine to keep. Things could always change, but right now I needed him to understand why I could not accept his offer._

" _I know why you cannot stay. I accept why you will not stay." His words stung my heart. "But, can I ask one thing?" I shrugged while still being held in his arms. "Wherever you go, wherever your next path takes you, take this with you." From his pocket, the man I had spent days and nights listening to, and talking to, pulled out the same ring._

" _I gave that back. I handed it back to your mother." I informed him of my actions, and he was no less accepting._

" _I know." He said again, placing the ring on my right hand. "My mother also informed me that you were holding back emotion when you gave it to her. I don't know what that says about your decision, but I want you to have it. Consider it a gesture of friendship. You saved me in a way that I was not expecting, and the truth is, I don't want anyone else to have the ring."_

" _You should give this ring to someone you care for." I tried to refuse._

" _I am. Even if you choose not to be my Guardian, I want you to wear it." He continued to make things difficult._

" _I will take it on one condition." I relented as the ring was placed on my finger. "When you find someone you deeply care for, and want to be with, you will ask for the ring back. Please."_

" _I promise." Aaron lowered his head, burying his face into my neck. "I don't know what I will do without you."_

" _You will do as expected." I chuckled slightly, recalling conversations he and I had in the last week. "You will live. You will live your life as any royal would. You will finish school and chose a Guardian that better suits you." He kissed my neck and my knees weakened again._

 _Aaron stayed as I finished packing, helping with the few bags I'd brought with me to the main lounge. Even then, he stayed as I sat, facing the large windows that overlooked outdoors._

" _What will you do?" He questioned the direction I planned on taking my life in now. "Where will you go from here?"_

" _I honestly don't know."_

" _For what it's worth," His hand linked with mine again, "I think you would make a phenomenal Guardian."_

 _I smiled, not knowing what to say in response. For the next hour, we sat in perfect silence, watching others walk past the large windows, on their way to ski or have fun in the weather, watching also as the snow fell peacefully to the ground. Aaron and I sat, contented until the time came for me to leave._

" _Bells," Bridgette spoke from behind us, "the Court jet is waiting. It's time to go."_

 _I stood, my fingers still intertwined with his, looking back at him as he stood. "I never guessed when I arrived here a week ago, that leaving would be so hard."_

 _His hand touched to my cheek, his fingers trailing down the side of my neck. All over again my control, my willpower was drained._

" _If you ever change your mind about being a Guardian; If you ever change your mind about us," That swell of uncertainty crept in, and I could, "I will be waiting." Aaron said, leaning down, pressing his mouth to mine, the warmth of the kiss wrapping itself around us. His kiss said much more than he ever could, and more than I would ever allow him to say._

My eyes opened slowly. It wasn't just a dream.. It was a memory. It was a memory that I did not have time to be considering right now. This was not the time for me to reminisce about Switzerland. There was trouble on the horizon, and Strigoi at the center.

"Bells, we're here." I heard Jesse's voice break through the swirling mass of confusion that I had cocooned myself in. I had no idea what I was going to say as the door opened and I descended the steps of the Court jet, setting foot back into the Moroi Court.

There is nothing worse than the unknown. When the enemy is hunting you, and you are hunting the enemy, and when your life is constantly at risk, there is no good in wondering what the outcome may be. Good? Bad? This is a job that can never truly determine the difference.

At night, just outside of our Court walls, and the walls of our homes, the dark corners that kept us hidden from enemies during the day become more dangerous. At night they become the corners that hide our worst nightmares. Even in the pitch dark of night, Strigoi would use the alleys, shadows, the wooded spaces, and other spaces to lure, to attack, and to kill. But every so often, more often lately, Strigoi would slip up, and attack in wider areas. They would step out of their safe shadows and they would be caught by our cameras and security systems. The Strigoi that dared to come out of their hiding places were immediately caught and dealt with in one way or another. These days there were new ways of "dealing" with the enemy. We now had methods of saving those who had been unwillingly turned, and those who intentionally turned. I wondered though, why I was the one being tasked to make this choice.

As I sat now, frozen in place, watching this footage over and over again, footage that had been shown to me three days ago, I wondered what the best possible choice was.

Dimitri was standing at the base of the steps, ready to greet me and Jesse as we arrived with such little notice. I hugged him, but he immediately sensed all of the stress I carried.

"What is going on, Bells? You and Jesse never show up to Court with less than twenty-four hours-notice."

He was all too aware of my scheduling crisis. "Is everyone here?" I needed to avoid his questions for as long as I could. What the hell was I supposed to say to him? I did not want to be the one to bring this information to him and the others I had personally called to appear with insufficient warning. I was still trying to process and find answers myself.

"Yuri and Sophia arrived yesterday. Stefan is here too." He stared down at me, trying to gain answers. "You called Stefan here from the Academy?"

I nodded, starting to make my way off of the tarmac with Jesse.

"Shane Reyes called too. He and Aaron are running late."

I did not need to mention that Shane had called me as well. He and Aaron were indeed running late, but would arrive soon enough. Yuri and Sophie were waiting in the greeting area, rushing towards me and Jesse as soon as the door opened.

"Bells." Yuri's voice was full of relief, seeing the distress that I tried to hide from Dimitri. I had already called Yuri, telling him as much as I could about this very confusing situation, without breaking down or getting angrier.

By the time that Yuri and I finished getting Jesse and Sophie settled in at their residence, it was time now to go and meet with the other Guardians I had sent emergency calls out to, disrupting lives, and worrying more people than I ever had before. It was decided that the larger of the conference rooms in the Guardian district of Court would be of better use, as I needed clear video and computer access. Adrenaline and anxiety both rose quickly, my stomach turned and my heart beat so fast that I was sure it might fly from my chest and across the expansive room as Yuri and I entered. I immediately ran to Eddie's open arms as he stood from the large circular table that took up most of the room's center, burying my face into his chest, trying desperately not to break down again. I tilted my head to the side, to see Rose and Dimitri sitting quietly confused with one another. I smiled and Rose did the same. Dimitri still worried, as I knew he would.

Once everyone quieted and sat down at the table, I stood in position to see the eyes of each person I knew I could call on for help. I was trying to find the right words to explain to them what I had seen. There were no words. I did not know what to say. Instead, I took a seat, placing my head into my hands.

"Bellamy, it is clear that everything is not okay? I heard Dimitri voice softly. "Did something…"

"Bells, what is this about?" Eddie was next to question.

I lifted my head, my eyes moving over to Yuri.

"It's time, Bells. You need to tell them what you told me."

I nodded as Yuri sent a smile of encouragement, strengthening my resolve to reveal everything.

"Rose," I approached this subject as carefully as I could. There was no gentle way of doing this, "what happened the day that Mason died in Seattle? You were in the house when he…" Even after these last few years, I couldn't bring myself to easily say the words.

"That's an odd question to ask."

"What kind of question is that, Bellamy?" Eddie was still defensive about Mason, and what he too thought happened that day.

"Let me rephrase my question." I had to gather all of my courage and logic. "Are you sure of every detail that occurred?"

"Am I sure?" Rose sounded more indignant than questioning, but I hated it when people avoided answering my questions by repeating them.

"How certain are you that he died?"

"Bellamy!" Both Eddie and Dimitri stood in defensiveness now. Not only was I questioning Mason's death, a dark moment for us all, but in their eyes I was also attacking Rose.

I looked back at all of my friends in the room, pleading with them to listen. "I'm sorry. I am not trying to be insensitive or cruel. I know all too well what Mason's death put you through, but this is a question that I must ask. I am asking with purpose. Rose," I met her eyes directly, "you know that I would never consider asking a question like this if it did not have good purpose. How sure are you?"

Rose gave a nod before her eyes were far more dismayed. "Up until a minute ago, I was one-hundred percent sure. But," she looked to Dimitri, "the look on your face and hearing you question this subject specifically, I…"

I knew that I had just made Rose feel uncertain, along with everyone else in the room. I needed that doubt in order for them to believe what they were about to see.

"I have been at the Guardian Court for the past several days and nights." I explained why Jesse and I were not in the UK. "More specifically, I was called and "asked" to appear in the office of Guardian Council member Katja Reznik."

A few of the Guardians looked unaware of the name, or Katja's position.

"Katja is not only a sitting Council member, but also the head of International Security Relations at the Guardian Court."

"That's a fancy way of saying she is in charge of the department that reviews any CCTV video that shows Strigoi attacks and sightings." Yuri said quietly to Eddie and Stefan.

"It is Katja's job to determine any threat levels and methods in which to control those threats." I corrected my husband. "Katja called me to Court on Wednesday."

"Bells, it's Saturday."

I gave Stefan a slight smile before continuing. "After my meeting with Katja, I spent the next two days screaming at every Council member I could corner at Court. They were all very glad to see me leave earlier today. When I was not screaming at them, I was watching and dissecting every part of this." I held up a cd, placing it then into the computer I had requested, pulling up the video that I had already seen. "Believe me when I say that each reaction to this video is completely justified and expected. This footage is recent." I said. "It was taken a week ago." I then had to walk to the opposite side of the room while the gasps and breaths of disbelief all made me cringe, bringing the tears back to my eyes all over again.

"This is impossible." I heard the disbelief in their voices, I heard the panic roll over the room from one person to the next, and through it all I could not ignore the fear, and most of all the despair.

"This is not happening. Bells, tell me this isn't happening." It was Eddie's voice I heard now. I went to him, pulling my arms up around his mid-section.

Mason Ashford was a Strigoi. I had no idea how it had happened. I had no idea when it had happened. But, the Strigoi that stepped out from the shadows this time was unexpected and heart-wrenching to say the least. And, despite being able to understand the emotional turmoil in others, my own emotions were still conflicted and numb. I especially needed Rose and Dimitri to see this video, after they had been at the house in Seattle when Mason had died. The couple was now as baffled as I was.

"How?" Dimitri then asked the real question, holding onto Rose the way I held Eddie.

"I don't know." Unfortunately, I had no answer for him or anyone else yet. "But, that is why I am here, and why I called you all in here to see this." The room went eerily silent. "The Council "offered" this latest mission to me first, considering my history with Mason. Even if I wanted to, I could not turn this mission down." When I used the word "offer", I was being generous. The truth was, I was not given a choice in this matter.

"You're going after him, aren't you?" Stefan guessed.

The idea of tracking and hunting Mason down was already exhausting me. "Yes I am. And I will not be going alone."

After the video was watched, watched again, paused, and once the initial shock had reached its peak, our small meeting began to let out. I was still talking with Yuri, as others started to separate.

"Rose," I caught her before she and Dimitri left the room too, "I know it is short notice, but is it possible for me to get a meeting with Lissa this evening?"

"After this bombshell? I think she will be willing to fit in a meeting with you."

"Great. I will be with Jesse and Sophia until the meeting is confirmed." I gathered my things up, and made the decision to disappear before a barrage of more questions could be considered, with no such luck.

Dimitri caught my hand as I passed by a separate secure room. Seeing the look in his eyes only made the confliction of my emotions worsen. I could see his guilt resurfacing, his own confusion, and worst was his concern. We needed to talk.

"Rose went straight to inform Lissa about all of this." He told me. "Are you alright?" His voice lowered to a whisper. He had known the instant I disembarked from the Court jet. He knew as soon as I had started to question things we already knew. He knew even more as he looked back into my eyes, questioning my once solid emotions and rationality.

Everything in me started to shake again, starting from my toes, working its way up to my shoulders. Shock was catching up with me. Dimitri caught me, his arms wrapped around my waist before I fell to the floor. He moved me to the closest chair he could find, calling Yuri in from the hallway too.

"He's Strigoi." I said out loud for the first time. "He was turned Strigoi."

"I am so sorry, Bellamy. If I had known… If any of us had even the slightest clue that he…"

"No." I felt my breathing speed up and slow. "Don't apologize, Dimitri. This is not your fault."

"But, we had his body." Dimitri was still questioning me with actual questions and half sentences. How, when, and where were the more common half questions, and I could not answer even one.

"I am as in the dark about this as you are." I replied. "All I was told by the Council is that he is Strigoi, and I am to retrieve him if possible."

"So, the Guardian Council wants you to go after him and bring him back?"

"They want me to put together a team of six or seven Guardians to go after him." My head lifted slightly. "I know that Rose and Lissa are going to be away from Court, on royal business, but I was hoping I could persuade you to help me out."

"You never needed to ask." Dimitri confirmed. "But, what about Christian? He is relatively safe at Court, but I might be able to ask Eddie to…"

"You think I'm not here to ask Eddie to go too? Mason was his best friend, and I know he will want answers like the rest of us." I had to pull back his plans for someone to temporarily guard Chris. "Actually Thor, I kind of need to talk to you about Christian."

Dimitri and Yuri were both worried, curious as to my approach about this subject. One shock should've been enough for the night.

"First, please do not tell Christian that I am here at Court yet."

Confusion crossed Dimitri's face again. Usually Christian was the first person I wanted to see, and the last. Usually, he knew weeks in advance before I would touch down at royal Court.

"Bells, he will see Jesse and know you're here. He will want to know what is going on. He will want to know why you won't see him. I cannot hold him at bay for long."

"I plan on seeing him, but there are some things that I need to see to before that."

Both men understood. Well, they agreed not to say anything.

"Now, the second part of this conversation might be more difficult. " I took a deep breath, preparing to ask Christian's Guardian for an unbelievably high risk favor of sorts. "While Jesse and I were in flight here to the Moroi Court, I was asked to devise a plan of attack to lure Mason out of hiding. I have come up with something unofficial, but I would never even consider attempting something like this without your permission first."

I told Dimitri and Yuri my potential and unofficial idea, and the look I received from my Guardian half-brother said everything that he didn't. Dimitri was not okay with this plan, and I could completely understand his disinclination to agree to such a wild and uncertain plan. Honestly, if he had come to me with something like this, I might react the same way. After everything that Dimitri had gone through after the death of Ivan Zeklos, I knew I was asking a lot. I was not going to convince him to say yes easily.

"What I am asking is a lot, I know, and it is easy to misinterpret what I am asking of you."

"Misinterpret?" Dimitri kept his voice as low as possible, but the harshness stayed. Others were still roaming the outside halls. "Let me see if I've got this straight." He and I went back and forth, each bringing our own arguments and logic to the table until eventually we came to a half-agreement, settling things there before splitting up again.

I should not have been so surprised to see Eddie in the courtyard outside of the apartment Yuri and I shared at Court.

"Ed?"

"Is it a joke?" He was hopeful in his question. "A cruel fabricated joke?"

Yuri smiled sweetly at me before moving into the apartment, giving me and Eddie more time alone to talk.

"Ed, you have been to Guardian Court with me. You have seen the resources that they have at their hands. We both know that the Council has many forms of recognition software to determine these things with ninety-nine point nine percent accuracy." I took his hand with mine, feeling him shake. "Honey, I went over this footage over and over for three days. I have lost sleep watching every part in great detail. It's him. It's really Mason."

"I don't understand any of this, Bells." I listened to my friend talk, trying to make sense of this news like the rest of us. "I was there. Rose, me, Christian, and Mia, we were all there. Granted, I was out of it much of the time, but…" It hurt my heart so much to hear his voice cracking with so much sadness. It was the sort of sadness that cannot find its way out of the darkness, the sort of sadness you do not easily return from.

"I wish I had more answers, sweetie." I consoled my friend, each question in my head doubling as I thought about everything Eddie said. My anger had doubled too, but still, I was numb, unable to banish any of the anger I was feeling.

"One minute, I want to be angry, with him, with the world, and with myself." Eddie went on. "We just got our lives back on track after the chaos we experienced in school, and then here. Everything is finally calm, and now this bombshell is thrown from left field." I wanted to cry. Eddie was right. We had all been through so much in the past few years, and we deserved a break. "The next minute, I want to be happy. He was my best-friend. If there is a chance," Eddie sat up, looking back at me now, "if there is even a fraction of a chance that we could get him back, does it matter how? Shouldn't we be happy about this?"

I wanted so badly then to say 'yes, we should be happy. We should run from Court, go find him, and bring him back home.' But I couldn't say that. It was a lie. I couldn't be happy about Mason being seen alive. I could not be happy about the possibility that he could return to our lives, like nothing had ever happened. There was something big missing, some extra hidden fact that I couldn't see. How had he escaped death and made us all believe he had died? How did he fake his own death? Why would he choose to fake his own death?

"What do you think, Bells?" Eddie finally asked me the question I dreaded most from him, and I had to answer. I had to say something to keep him from falling further into his dark abyss.

"I think…" I hesitated, trying to find the most diplomatic words. "I think there is no denying this revelation. I think that I have lost three days and nights of sleep over this. And mostly, I think that we have no choice but to face the truth now."

"That does not answer my question." Eddie was not in a state of mind to accept my response. "That doesn't tell me how you feel about all of this."

"You didn't ask me how I feel. You asked me what I think."

"Same difference." He unraveled my logical argument. "You still didn't answer."

Eddie let my hand drop from his, likely sensing my discomfort in answering a question that I was not ready to answer yet.

"I don't know." I was honest with him. "I don't know how I feel or what I think. I don't know how I'm supposed to process any of this. I don't know how the Council didn't know about Mason until now. And, I do not know why they would expect me to process any of this without questioning everything. His death shattered me, and I am expected to relive all of that pain. I swear I'm losing more and more faith in people by the day."

As I sat silent, Eddie did the same, pulling his arm around my shoulders, leaning his head against me as I leaned on him.

"Bells," Eddie and I stayed close as Jesse was on his way out of his front door, neighboring mine and Yuri's, "Aaron and Shane are here. The plane is touching down now."

Normally, I might take my time to join Jesse, and get to the hangar, but I was expecting Shane Reyes, another Guardian friend. He needed to know this news about Mason too. Eddie was at my side the entire time. I was sure that like me, he wanted to see if he could make sense of this from a different perspective, through another set of eyes. Evening was finally falling as Court became more crowded with not just Guardians, but also Moroi. There were visiting classes from St. Vladimir's and St. Basil's this week, so it was possible that we would all have to be more careful about what was said, and who it was said around for a while. The numbered hangar for the arriving flight was empty, all except for the taxiing jet that held mine, Eddie's, and Jesse's friends.

"My girl!" Shane greeted me as soon as he and Aaron were fully descended from the jet.

His smile made me feel better and forget the bad for all of five seconds, throwing my arms around his neck, and holding him close for as long as he allowed.

"Hey," Shane too picked up on my anxious and disconcerting behavior, "what is it, love? What is going on with you?

"Yes," I heard the displeasure in Aaron's voice as he spoke, "do please tell us why you've called us here, back to Court, last minute, from a much needed vacation."

"Aaron." Shane spoke in a way that told Aaron he was being rude.

"No." I stopped him. "He is right. I should have a good reason for calling you last minute, asking you to come to my rescue immediately and without question, disrupting your lives and plans."

"And she does have good reason." Eddie added to the conversation, greeting Shane and Aaron as well. "She has an unbelievable reason."

I pulled Aaron off to the side to speak with him privately. I needed to be careful of what I said and how it was construed, keeping many details out of the conversation.

"I had a dream on the way to Court." I mentioned. "I had his full attention as he smirked. "My dream was about the last night we were in St. Moritz together."

"That night was a difficult time for both of us." He reminded me. I agreed, hoping remembering that time would help my explanation.

"Aaron, as difficult as that night was, what I'm about to do is going to be one hundred times more terrifying for you, me, and others. I need you to agree to let me borrow Shane. I need your permission, and you cannot question why I am asking yet.."

"You need me to trust you." He considered.

"Yes."

"You know that I do." He wasn't hesitating, his hand touching to my arm sweetly, and I knew that despite our history, he still undoubtedly trusted me.

While we are away," I spoke to both Jesse and Aaron now, "I do hope that you are both mature enough now to keep out of trouble. Jess." My attention was directly on the Moroi I was in charge of keeping safe and out of trouble or danger.

"Still don't trust me?" My blond Moroi smiled, still trying to charm me after all this time."

"With Aaron? Hell no." I replied. "The two of you get together, and it's like you revert to being twelve years old again."

Jesse still smiled, leaning over to kiss my cheek. "Don't worry so much, Bells."

"Promise you will be safe. I've seen you get into more trouble that your children."

Jesse promised as Shane provided much of the same warning to Aaron.

Eddie took my hand again as the two of us led Shane back to my apartment, where no other eyes and ears would interfere with the plan still to come. I squeezed his hand, happy to have his hand to hold while Shane found the video equally as inexplicable.

"Where did this come from?" Shane inquired, sitting down, pausing the video on the face he was seeing.

"Guardian Council." I sat with him. "Katja Reznik called a meeting with me, and showed me this in strict confidence. Now, I am showing you in that same confidence."

"And we are sure it's…"

"It's him." Eddie agreed with me. "There are still distinct mannerisms that are one-hundred percent Mason." He had noticed.

"His index finger tapping to his neck before he attacks?" Shane said. "I caught that one too."

We were all three silent, the video still on pause for the next ten minutes, none of us knowing still what to say. Shane however, like me and Eddie, was never one to let a problem continue to get worse.

"So, what are we going to do about this?"

"We are going after him." Eddie had decided to stay at my side no matter the outcome, the moment he had seen the video footage the first time. I knew that I never needed to ask him either.

"The Guardian Council's orders are to kill him only if I must, but it is preferred that I bring him back to be questioned by the Guardian and Moroi Councils." I corrected Eddie about what I was asked to do.

"Okay." Shane was not one to hesitate either. "I'm in. When do we leave?"

"Whoa." I put the brakes on both men. "No one is going anywhere yet. I need to talk to the Queen tonight. I need any plan that is drawn out to be sanctioned by her and the Guardian Council. I need to find a way to tell Jesse that we aren't going back home to the UK for a while. And I need to come to terms with what I'm about to do. Otherwise, we're all going to be floating in a boat at sea without oars."

"Jesse's going to love hearing that you're not leaving for a while." Eddie said using his more facetious tone.

"The point is, there is more to do than simply deciding to run off looking for Mason. We need proper plans in place." I stood back up. "And it goes without saying, not a word of this to anyone. The Court has eyes and ears. We do not need this flying through Court as a wild rumor."

The three of us made a plan to get together after my meeting with the Queen, but I still had so much to do.


	2. Chapter 2

PART 2:

After making a short run over to many of the Court security buildings, I spoke with a few more Guardians to get the information I needed to keep my Moroi and his family safe, even at Court. We'd had problems here before, and I was not taking any chances. I then had a few minutes to spend with my husband, getting his opinion on all that was happening. Next on his mind, was Christian.

"Bells, doesn't your idea further complicate the situation?" Yuri asked me.

"I don't think it does. I think it is one of the very few things that may push this Strigoi to face me."

"You aren't thinking clearly because it's…" I could tell by his behavior and the sound of his voice, what Yuri's real problem with this was. The problem wasn't a Strigoi. It was Mason. After we'd discovered tha this ex Katya Gorchakova had survived, and after she managed to torture me with Illya, Yuri's brother, he was justifiably concerned.

"Yuri, if I asked you to stay here at Court with Sophie and Jess, would you?"

His arms pulled me into him, as close as he could. "I would, but first I would ask why you would keep me from going. Is it because of Mason or Christian?"

"Neither. It's because of Jesse. But also a little because of Mason." I honestly told him. "If he is going to believe anything I say, he cannot know about you yet."

"You are playing a game of deception with Strigoi." Yuri pointed out what he saw as a flaw. "That is dangerous."

"Every bit of this situation is dangerous. Strigoi feed on deception, and whether he is Dhampir or Strigoi, Mason Ashford isn't going to just come when called. He will need motivation. I cannot use most emotion in this case. Strigoi only know anger, hatred, jealousy, and in some cases greed. I need you to be here with Jesse and Soph also because you know Jesse is going to go bat crap crazy when I tell him that I'm leaving."

"Are you going to tell him why you are leaving?" Yuri and I both considered the repercussions of a decision like that.

"No. I don't think he would take it well. I'll only tell him as much as is necessary."

As night fell, and evening faded to the background, I was surprisingly early for my previously unplanned meeting with Vasilisa Dragomir. I made it to the royal receiving rooms where the current Queen held many of her meetings in more comfort, rather than the stuffy ornate rooms Tatiana used during her reign, made to intimidate others. I was met at the door by Rose, who still looked uncertain and in shock, but as I peeked inside of the room, I saw Lissa staring at a computer screen, her hands over her mouth in sheer panic, and the same tears in her eyes. After hearing what Rose had to say, the Queen postponed two diplomatic phone calls with royal families, in order to speak with me.

"How are you doing?" I asked Rose, waiting for Lissa to finish.

"I don't know." She shook her head, trying to make sense of what she had been through in Seattle, and what she had seen then versus what she was being told now. "I really don't know how to react after seeing something so…"

"Impossible?"

Rose gave a single nod.

"Guardian Pearce?" Lissa turned in her chair, spotting me and Rose at the door. "Bellamy, is this real?" I could hear the edge of hope ringing out as she spoke. "Is it true?"

I wish she had not sounded so hopeful. I wish she hadn't sounded as though this were at all easy. It wasn't, and I could not feel what she was feeling. I still couldn't feel much of anything. I had cried when Mason died, I cried when I realized that I had let him go and moved on, but I could not find it in myself to cry over this. I was done crying.

"It's true. It's all true, very real, and it will not be an easy road from here forward." I made this as clear as I could.

"Does the Guardian Council have a plan? What can the Moroi Council do to help? What can I do?" She asked in seriousness, with that tone of authority she did not often use with me.

"Guardian Reznik has asked me to devise a secure plan of attack, and that is what I am doing. It is also one of the reasons that I asked for this meeting. I have a request that I need to make of you, as both Queen and as a friend."

"What is your request?"

"This request I'm about to make is going to ruffle feathers at both Courts if it gets out. It must be kept confidential."

She looked back at me, intrigued by what I might ask. "I trust you, Bellamy. This Court trusts you. Whatever you might ask-"

"And if I asked for your permission to borrow Christian as part of this mission, and as part of my plan?"

"I'm afraid I don't understand." Lissa spoke. "Christian is part of your plan?"

"Bellamy," Rose started, "the laws about Moroi…"

"The laws about Moroi fighting in the field are very clear. I wholeheartedly agree with those laws, and I do not plan on breaking any of those laws."

"Just bending them?"

"More like using fine print to bypass them." I said, and Rose looked fascinated.

"One of these days you'll have to show me how you get around the Guardian laws, and how you know them all so well."

I took in another deep breath, returning to Lissa. "I don't know what all Christian has told you, but when I attended St. Vladimir's as a novice, I was in love with Mason. I was also in love with Christian. They were both in love with me too."

"Christian has told me much more about your friendship and your relationship over time, and it's helped me understand why you two are so close. But I don't see what one has to do with the other."

"What Chris didn't tell you, because he didn't know the extent of it, is that Mason and I fought a lot throughout our relationship too. We mostly fought over my friendship with Christian, my refusal to stay away from Christian, and we fought over what Mason saw as flirting between me and Christian. He hated the way that Chris would look at me, the way I would touch his arms, hold his hand, or protect him."

"So, it wasn't just about Christian's parents and the mainstream dislike for all things Ozera." Rose caught on.

"Nope. Mason disliked Christian because Christian had a part of me that wasn't understood by Mason or anyone else."

"So, their rivalry put you in the middle." Lissa was caught up, and catching on to my plan.

"I have not come to this request or plan easily. I will always say that Moroi do not belong anywhere near the field, no excuses. But, Christian is the only person who can help me provoke Mason enough into making any sort of appearance. Chris and I can tap into the anger and jealousy he felt."

"And you're sure that Christian can provoke Mason enough to…"

"Chris is one of the best I know at antagonizing people. " I joked, gaining laughs from both Rose and Lissa. "I'm ninety-percent sure that Christian's presence will be enough to help."

"And the other ten percent?"

"The other ten percent is up to me. For better or worse, Mason and I have a complicated history. "

Lissa questioned me for the better part of an hour, and unfortunately there were still answers I did not have-one in particular, but once our meeting finished, I had one more argument I would have to face sooner rather than later. I could not avoid contacting the Guardian Council any longer after talking to both Dimitri and Lissa. I needed the Council's permission most of all in order to move forward. If I made the decision to utilize Christian in the field without getting approval from the Council, it wouldn't matter if Lissa and Dimitri were in agreement. My Guardian title, duties, and even my decision making would all be called into question.

As expected, they were not receptive to this idea either. At first.

"Guardian Pearce," I heard the sharp tone of voice that came with a refusal or a reprimand, "this is a highly unorthodox appeal." It was Rhiannon Morgan. "And, it is surprising that such a request is coming from you, considering your own stringent beliefs against Moroi being allowed to fight in the field."

"Please Guardian Morgan, I would not make a request this extreme if I did not believe it to be the most advantageous choice, and if I did not think that it would be successful without loss of life. My beliefs about Moroi fighting have not changed; magic or no magic. It is not my plan to allow Christian Ozera to fight. I would never place him in danger. I would never risk his life." I had to make my case very carefully with this Council.

"But you are asking us to allow you to bring this specific Moroi into a potentially dangerous battle with you?" Guardian Reznik added to the outrageousness of my idea. "Your request is asking us to approve a mission that brings the Moroi lord with you, to locate this Strigoi."

"Yes."

"How does that prevent putting a Moroi life at risk? How would you keep lord Ozera from…"

"I do not want Christian anywhere near a fight, if it comes to that. If it should come to a fight, I will already have multiple safety procedures in place to ensure Christian's safety. Really, I only need him as…"

"Bait." Alicia Jordan finished, and although I did not want to use that term for Christian, I agreed.

"Essentially."

I'd never spent so much time pleading a case or making a request of the Guardian Council. Normally, Guardians made a request, the Council would deliberate and make a decision. They had a long list of questions for me this time, and I was not prepared yet for them all.

"I cannot lure this Strigoi out of his hiding place without Christian Ozera."

"Why Lord Ozera?" Rhys questioned me.

And this was the easiest answer. "Because of the challenging history between Christian and Mason, with me stuck in the middle. Not to mention that Christian Ozera is not just any royal Moroi. He and the Dragomir Queen are the two royals that rank highest on Strigoi kill lists." Was this helping or hurting my case? I wasn't so sure. "Mason Ashford does not like Chris. If Christian and I are seen together, Mason will make his presence known."

There was a long drawn-out silence from the other end of the phone as members of the Council quietly deliberated.

"Guardian Pearce, "I finally heard Katja say, "we would like a fullcomprehensive plan in writing, detailing all of the questions we have posed, as well as any plans you make."

"Of course, Guardian Reznik." I agreed.

"And," This was not the end of their restrictions and demands, "it will be your responsibility to clear this with Guardian Belikov. You then will be solely responsible for the royal. His life is in your hands throughout the whole of this mission. You will take accountability for any and all unforeseen problems, injury, or death that may occur."

Stepping back out of the receiving room, I spotted my big brother, arms crossed, back leaning against the trunk of a tree, clearly waiting on my exit.

"What is the verdict from the Queen?" He moved straight to the point.

I shrugged. "She had some questions and more than a few reservations, but I spent the last hour talking to her, and answering questions about the complicated history between me, Mason, and Christian. She understands why it has to be him. It has to be Christian."

"Does it?" Dimitri wondered out loud. "Does it have to be Christian?"

"Yes." I was fighting for this one. "Yes, it has to be Chris." I understood Dimitri's reluctance to let Christian tag along as part of this mission. He had already lost one Moroi to Strigoi, and blamed himself. Now, I expected him to let me use Christian to provoke another Strigoi? I was putting Christian's life in direct danger, for what purpose? My own plan? A plan that might or might not work?

"Bellamy," Dimitri was giving me the strangest look, "there is something you need to know before you decide to bring Christian into this." He spoke with that scary warning tone. "Come with me."

Dimitri took hold of my hand, driving us all the way to the opposite end of Court, to one of the many Hall of Records. As a Guardian working and residing within the royal Court, Dimitri had access to the building. And apparently as a Head royal Guardian to a high ranking royal, so did I. The cavernous building was as decorated and opulent as any of the other royal buildings Tatiana had designed. And from floor to ceiling, the entire building was filled with, what else? Records. Files on both Moroi and Guardians, and their conduct, depending on the infraction or on the special occurrence were all filed in a special sort of crazy order. Dimitri sat me down at a table with a small simple reading lamp. I watched him as he moved through the room, down aisles and through numbers and names. He had a purpose, even if I did not know what it was yet. The records, like all of those at the Guardian Court, were pretty extensive, but they were not as organized as Guardian Court records. Dimitri seemed to know its system well. His expression was rapt, totally focused on his task, but his eyes were different, catching my attention. I'd only seen this look in his eyes one other time. I watched him with just as much purpose.

"Dimitri," I made him stop and turn, "you are starting to frighten me. You need to tell me what is going on."

Finally, he found the file he was searching for, placing it down onto the table in front of me. "You should read this."

I slid the file back at him. "I don't want to read a damn file. I want you to talk to me. I want you to tell me why we are here."

"Bellamy, please. I would not do this if it weren't necessary."

"Dimitri Belikov." I used his name in a way that shut him down. He sat. "I do not have the patience or the strength to play this game. We have enough to deal with."

"Okay." He relented, causing a chill to run the length of my spine as he said the word.

"The only other time I have seen that look in your eyes, was when Jesse and I returned to Court, the first time you and I saw each other after you were turned Dhampir again. That look in your eyes is genuine fear. You were afraid of my reaction back then, and you are afraid now."

"You and Christian have been in a similar situation before this." He told me.

"With Mason? I admit they had their problems, but never…"

"With Queen Tatiana." Dimitri said. "I should not be saying any of this. These files will tell you everything." He pushed the thick folder back to me. "If you insist on bringing Christian on this mission, I will not try to stop you."

"Glad to hear it."

"On one condition."

There is always a condition. "And the proviso of your choosing is?"

His hand moved to the folder again. "Read. You need to know all of the facts first."

This time I relented, opening the file folder, full of pages. Apparently, Dimitri was telling me the truth. Christian and I had been in a similar fire fight, metaphorically speaking, with the former Queen and her guards. We ran from St. Vladimir's, we were kept hidden, but still we were found. I read on further, reading about what the Queen had done, toying with the compounds of my blood even more.

"I don't remember any of this." I said to Dimitri.

"You wouldn't." He replied. "After everything was said and done, you made the decision to have yours and Christian's memories wiped of all of this."

"No." I still refused to believe what I saw. "No way. I wouldn't do that. I would not ask Christian to do that either."

"You did."

"Why?" The only thing I could think was: Records don't lie. Not the records in this hall anyway.

Dimitri then put his hand on mine. I fought the urge to pull back.

"I cannot answer that for sure. All I can say is that what you and Christian endured together, was traumatic for both of you. You fought so hard for each other. You were separated and both injured greatly. I think by being compelled, you were protecting yourself and Christian too. You were both having nightmares. It was…it was bad Bellamy."

"Then answer this." I made my demand. "How does any of this work to help the situation now, if I can't remember. It was compelled from me. Why are you telling me any of this? Are you trying to change my mind about Christian?"

"I do not want to see you go down the same road."

"What road? I don't remember what happened, Dimitri." I was getting more upset. I should not have been so worked up, but at least I was finally expressing more emotion. "Aren't you breaking the rules by revealing all of this?

"Probably." He smiled slowly.

"This is all quite enlightening." I calmed down, feeling Jesse at work to quell the inner discord I felt. "But, I still don't see how it does much now."

"I just needed you to know."

"And now I do."

He and I sat at the table, silent, studying each other until deciding we'd had enough.

"Come on." I insisted, standing, taking his hand this time. "I would like to pay a visit to Sonya."

Dimitri pulled back a little. "Sonya? For what purpose?"

"I'm multitasking." I cryptically said. "I have a theory I've been trying to work out for months, and I would like to discuss it with her." I kept walking as we talked. "After I had that very weird yet extremely perceptive conversation with your grandmother in Baia, I started thinking."

"Bells, I've already told you, you cannot take everything she says so seriously."

"I just want to answer the questions I have, seeing as she wouldn't give any."

A few months back, Yuri and I had travelled with Dimitri and Rose, to meet Dimitri's mother, his sisters (also my half-sisters), and his grandmother. It was an illuminating visit. Rose had forewarned me about Yeva Belikova, but the older woman seemed harmless from a distance. I quickly learned that I should've listened to Rose.

"'From the ashes of fire comes new life.' That was what your grandmother Yeva said. "'You are given the gift and the curse of rebirth each day'. There is something more to that."

"Bellamy." Dimitri still complained, but we were already pulling up to the Science, Research, Design, and Development building where Sonya Karp-Tanner spent much of her time. "Bellamy, is this really a priority right now?"

"Yes." I said firmly, softening my demeanor. "You don't have to come with me. You can…"

Dimitri amiably smiled, opening the door for me, entering and following in after me.

"Did Dimitri's grandmother say anything more?" Sonya asked, sitting in her chair, studying me the way she often did when I sat to talk with her, while she studied me and my blood. Sonya had a calming presence despite her strange disposition, so I was happy to be around her right now. I needed a little calm in my life currently.

"Nothing worth mentioning." Dimitri stood next to me, answering before I could after I told Sonya much of what the older woman had to say to me.

"I was hoping that since you have been examining my blood for different or unlikely components, maybe we could try a short dive into a few new theories."

"What sort of theories were you thinking?" I did enjoy Sonya's interest in almost everything around her.

"You are going to think I'm crazy."

"Try me."

"Well, having Strigoi blood mixed into my system suggests there is more to me than others, so I want to start with a strange and improbable theory. Immortality."

Dimitri made a choking sound, but Sonya looked committed and intrigued by the half theory I was running on.

"I don't necessarily mean that I could be immortal."

"To be immortal, you'd have to be Strigoi." Dimitri argued the opposing side.

"I am part Strigoi. We have already established that."

"Strigoi don't have use of their magic." He continued.

"Dhampir aren't supposed to have magic either, but I do. And when we were in Baia with everyone, I admit I did not take any seriousness to what Yeva said, but it has been weighing on my mind Dimitri. There is more to what was said. That crap your grandmother said about rebirth is relative to…"

"Bellamy, it's ridiculous." He interrupted. "It's a half concocted theory that has no real foundation or path to research."

"Maybe, maybe not." Sonya countered Dimitri's argument, but Dimitri was not up for debating this.

"Sonya, please do not encourage her."

While Sonya sat, taking more blood from my arm, and testing it against any and all of our theories again, I was busy noticing Dimitri's sullen mood, and the grimace on his face.

"I didn't mean to upset you over this. I know it is far-fetched. I know it is an improbable theory."

"It's not that, Bells."

"Then what seems to be bothering you? Is it the Christian subject?"

His eyes tilted up to me again. "I wish that you could remember what I do. I wish you could truly understand why I am so worried about this decision of yours. It is not just about Christian. It's about you too."

At least I finally had him talking. "I wish I could remember taking on Tatiana too, but it doesn't work like that."

Did it? Compulsion was part of the Moroi magic, my brain silently hypothesized. Plenty of Moroi could use compulsion at varying levels, on unsuspecting Dhampir and humans. Those who were best at it though, were Moroi with spirit magic, like Adrian, Lissa, or even Sonya. My thoughts ran wild again, and my eyes widened as I considered a deeper question.

"Sonya, you're a spirit user." I pointed out the obvious, but she nodded politely anyway. "What are the laws pertaining to compulsion, or in your case super-compulsion?"

"That depends on what are you asking?" Sonya looked up from the work she concentrated on.

"I'm not entirely sure." I did what I could to properly phrase my next inquiry. "I guess what I am asking, is if compulsion can work in both directions. Can someone be un-compelled to recall specific events?"

Again, I had her full attention. "I am not sure I've ever heard of such a thing."

"Do you think it might be possible?"

"Bellamy, no." Dimitri did not want me questioning or attempting to walk down this road either.

"That is an intriguing question, and an even more intriguing idea. Scientifically," Sonya reflected out loud, "I do not see that it is possible."

Dimitri looked relieved, but I was not giving up.

"And magically?" I asked. "I know that Science and Magic are in many ways intertwined, but spirit magic seems different. Spirit users are always more powerful, and you can do things that other Moroi only dream about. Everything you can do contradicts space, time, life, death, and truth."

"We are still learning more and more about spirit and its different gifts and uses every day. There may be a user out there somewhere that can do what you are asking."

"So we would have to search for that one in a billion Moroi who could potentially do that?" Dimitri sounded purposely smug. I didn't like it.

"Perhaps not." Sonya lifted my hopes again. "If there is a spirit user who can do what you are asking, then maybe other spirit users can learn the technique too. Adrian Ivashkov and Queen Vasilisa have been practicing to learn each other's abilities. But as I understand it, neither is as strong in their learned talents."

"Adrian did heal and bring Jillian back to life when she was attacked those years ago." I recalled Eddie telling me the entire story when we were able to really sit and catch up. "He had to learn how to do that."

"Bringing people back to life has it consequences." Dimitri also reminded me that Adrian and Jill were now shadow-kissed, as Lissa and Rose once were. Rose had to die again in order to sever that consuming tether.

"All action has its consequence, Dimitri." I returned to him. "There is no getting around choices and repercussions. Basic Philosophy. It also does not guarantee that the outcome will be bad."

Without warning, I felt weightless, my thoughts going fuzzy. A sharp piercing coursed through me, causing such a strange sensation. I was feeling lightheaded only as Sonya's hand touched to my shoulder. I turned and saw her hypnotic gaze luring me down further into a chasm of dream and memory. But, as quickly as it all hit me, it disappeared.

"What was that?"

"I'm sorry, Bellamy. I'm just not strong enough on my own."

"Wait, it…you were trying to reverse the compulsion? I think it was working. I could feel something strange occurring."

"But, I cannot hold on for long."

Sonya returned to her study of me and my bloodwork, while Dimitri now seemed more interested in this wild idea of compulsion reversal.

"You could feel it working?" He kept his voice relatively lower. "How did it feel? Do you remember anything yet?" He had more questioned than I did.

My head shook. "I don't know how to explain it. It was as though memories were swarming around me into a giant funnel. I couldn't see them or remember anything. But, I am thinking about what Sonya said about Lissa and Adrian not being as strong in their learned abilities, compared to their dominant magical talents."

"And?"

"And, I am wondering if we could vary our tactics in this case. Maneuvering with an army is more advantageous and more likely to work."

"Strength in numbers."

"Exactly." I said.

Dimitri was more on board now. I wasn't going to argue with his change of heart, but if he wanted to help, I had a job for him. While he disappeared to help gather the people I wanted, and any other materials necessary, I was pulling out my cell phone and stepping to the side of the room. This call was unexpected, but I was happy to hear that through the shock of me calling, he was thrilled to hear from me.

"It's true." I listened to Adrian Ivashkov say. "Our ability to compel others is stronger. Lissa can compel entire rooms on her own, and Sonya… "

"That's good to hear, because I am going to need you here, to use your magnificent compulsion in reverse." I told him, hearing silence on the other end of my phone.

"I am not sure I understand. Use compulsion in reverse? Reverse a compulsion?"

Deep breathing, Bellamy. "I need you, Lissa, and Sonya to try to reverse a compulsion that was done on me and Christian back at St. Vladimir's. I need to remember certain moments about an event."

"Is that possible?" What you're asking, I've never heard of anything like this."

I told Adrian about Sonya's first attempt, silencing him again. "If bringing Strigoi back to life is possible, why not this? I think it can potentially be learned, and at the very least, tried."

"It sounds dangerous." Adrian sounded like Dimitri had at first.

"I do not doubt that there may be risks involved," I agreed, "but there is a tenuous situation that I must take care of, and it has come to my attention that there are parts of my past and Christian's that others would like me to recall if possible."

"When do you need me, Guardian goddess?" He still used the nickname he'd given me the first time we met.

"As soon as I have you convinced." I said. "The sooner the better."

"Me, Syd, and Dec are on our way." Adrian was gracious enough to make a trip back to the Moroi Court with his family.

I hung up my phone, looking over to see Sonya smiling as if she held some secret about me. Maybe she did know things about me that even I was not aware of. A few short hours later, Adrian had arrived, and somehow, Dimitri had managed to convince Lissa that this would be a good idea. She still didn't look too sure, but she was willing to try.

"You had me compelled?!" Christian was not exactly shouting when he entered my apartment, but he was louder than normal. "Why?" He moved swiftly to my side of the room. "Why would you do something like that, Bells?"

Out of defense, I placed my palms between me and Chris, keeping him at arm's length temporarily.

"First of all Christian, I had both of us compelled. Second, I don't remember why. I can't remember either. But, if you are willing to attempt an experiment, we can find out together."

"I'm willing." Christian agreed. "Let's go."

"I explained to him the conversation I'd had with Sonya and Dimitri earlier, and he did not look nervous, but he sounded it.

"How does this work?" His eyes were on the three spirit users talking in the corner.

"We don't know." Lissa said to him. "It's a guess. It might not work. We might not be strong enough."

"Sonya tried the experiment on me once already," I tried to silence his frustration and fears, "but she was not strong enough on her own."

"Will it hurt?"

I took his hand with mine.

Lissa moved to Christian as Yuri too was at my side. I had made certain that he made sure Jesse and Sophia were kept busy for the next few hours, or however long this took. I hoped that none of this would be felt by Jesse. He had not mentioned anything from when Sonya made her attempt, so I figured I was good.

"Is remembering your quarrel with Tatiana really this important Bellamy?" Yuri whispered softly, my face buried in him as he spoke.

"Dimitri is worried I'm repeating some destructive path with Christian. I am making this choice Yuri. I do need to do this. If there is something I need to avoid, I need to know. "I pulled back looking back into his always wonderful eyes. "If it gets to be too much, I'll stop."

Yuri leaned down and kissed me less passionately as we did when in front of others. "I love you, Bells." He told me.

"I love you too." We let go of each other, and Christian and I sat back down in two chairs, at the center of the room.

"We will work separately, one on one, in order to put you back into your memories from St. Vladimir's." Adrian explained. "Then we will all three work together to strengthen the reversal. I will work first with Bellamy, and Sonya will work with Christian. Lissa will help once you are deep enough in."

Christian and I agreed, preparing ourselves for the unknown in every way possible.

Adrian took my hands with his, looking directly at me, compelling me into the memories I already had. "I need you to fall. Fall back to your time at St. Vladimir's as novice. Remember Dimitri training you, remember Bridgette," my heart and mind cried remembering Bridgette alive and happy with Dimitri. "Remember the good, the bad, the successes and failures, the joy and the pain, the fear, and all of your fearlessness. " Adrian had regressed me back far enough to that time, and in the distance, through the many things I could recall, I felt more hands on me. Adrian's still held my hands, but now there were more on my arms.

The three Moroi spirit users worked for the next hour, pushing the limits of their power, their powers waning every so often, and returning after they stepped away and took a breath. And then suddenly, like a bolt of lightning, I could see the swarm of memories returning, and I could see the flashes of pictures, strange pictures of memories that I neither remembered nor forgot. I could feel these foreign memories returning, and I could feel every emotion that had been lost with them. I remembered the helplessness, I remembered the protectiveness, I remembered missing Mason. I had a sudden flash then of Queen Tatiana appearing at the Zeklos estate where Bridgette and Dimitri had hidden me and Christian. I saw me and Christian being held captive in cells, deep in a bunker located secretly at St. Vladimir's. I recalled every detail of how Tatiana looked at me, yelling at me to attack Christian, to use my own magic against him. Christian and I were separated when we refused. We fought, we shouted, but I was forced to the cold sterile table, wires and needles stuck into me as I struggled to escape and help Christian.

Out of nowhere, pain rippled through me over and over again as it all flooded back. I felt as though I were being ripped in two. I reached over with my hand, finding Christian, his hand gripping mine tighter, the pain coursing through him as well.

"Chris." I was barely able to get his name out through my gritted teeth, but I could feel him with me, I could hear his response.

"I'm fine." He lied. "I can remember everything. Keep going." He insisted as the three still held their hands to us, helping us to remember everything to the end.

The pain did not fully subside when Lissa, Adrian, and Sonya removed their hands, but lessened slowly as my eyes refocused out of the compulsion. I could see figures around me, but my vision was still blurry.

"Stand back!" I heard Dimitri yell to everyone still in the room with us.

The others sounded as though they were in awe.

"What is happening?" Christian asked. I assumed his vision was blurry too.

"It's beautiful." Sonya spoke. "Look at the way their aura shines as one together."

There was light surrounding me, the color of a sunrise, just before dawn. Reds, oranges, golds, and blues all blended in harmony around me. I laughed, feeling at peace, turning my head to see Christian looking back at me. The same colors were around him, and he was smiling too.

"I remember it all. You saved my life Bells." He acknowledged with gratitude in his words. "You were willing to risk your own life for mine."

I smiled back at him still, standing carefully. "Chris, I will always be willing to sacrifice anything, including my life, not just for Jesse and Sophie, but for you too. Always."

Christian stood with me, our hands still linked as he moved in closer, bringing my hands and arms around him. I laid my head to his chest, and closed my eyes again, sensing the colors that surrounded us growing brighter and brighter until the increase of power exploded outward. We both fell to our knees, still holding each other. Dimitri, Yuri, Adrian, and Sydney all surrounded us, helping us both to our feet.

"Always." Christian repeated.

We were all breathing heavily. Yuri was with me again, looking helpless and curious. I held tight to him through the surrounding bodies.

"Did it work?" He asked me, and I nodded against him.

"It worked." I said with a clear mind. "I know what happened." Tears suddenly sprang to my eyes. I backed away from Yuri and everyone else, feeling claustrophobic. "Christian and I remember everything about Tatiana, her guards, how they hunted us, used us, and whoa…" A few things were still trickling back, but my brain came to an abrupt halt. I looked to Christian. "I remember that room in Ivan's house." At the mention of it, Christian and I laughed.

My eyes still met with Christian's, and I could see so much more now. I made my way over to him, sitting with him on one of the couches, curling up against my best friend as he pulled me closer, resting his head against mine.

"Maybe we should give them some time alone to talk." Dimitri made the suggestion.

Yuri was reluctant to leave, as was Lissa, but reassurances from me and Christian were enough to get an empty room. We didn't move away from each other, and we did not talk. We didn't need to. Our connection was stronger than ever now that we could recall every detail of that time. We sat for another two hours together, content to just be. When we left the apartment, I walked him back to the Queen's residences.

"Go get some sleep." I ordered, kissing his cheek.

"Bellamy." His voice stopped me as I turned, twisting back to see him unmoved.

"I know Chris. Me too."

I knew now what Dimitri had been referring to when he'd mentioned that he did not want to see me make the same mistakes with Christian. Christian and I had nearly lost that battle with Tatiana, and if it had not been for Dimitri and Bridgette, neither me nor Christian would be alive today. But, even after remembering all of that, I felt that I needed more than ever to have Christian Ozera at my side in this next battle.

"Chris," I stopped him from walking away, finally ready to ask him for this favor. "I need to talk to you about one more thing."

"Sure, Bells." He yawned.

"I need to ask you a favor."

"Anything." He said, and I knew how much he meant it.

As I turned back around, moving towards the gates where Christian stood waiting, I wondered where I should start.

"Has Dimitri told you anything at all about why I am here at Court so unexpectedly?"

Christian shook his head. "No, but come to think of it, you never show up to Court without a few weeks of planned notice." He was right. Yuri and I always kept our schedules tight, and we gave both Courts enough notice before we visited. "So, what are you doing here?"

I snuck back under his arm again, happier being close to him. "I was at the Guardian Court before this, and I had to get here to the Moroi Court to show other Guardians…" This was still the tricky part in my mind. "Chris, I am heading up a mission to go and subdue a Strigoi."

"Okay. I know that when you say subdue, you mean something totally different." He was still in the dark. "Why all the secrecy?"

My voice lowered to a whisper as people passed by us. "The Strigoi we are going after is Mason."

"Mason?" There was the disbelief and shock I expected to hear. "Mason Ashford? Bells, that's impossible. Mason died in…"

"Seattle. Yes, that seems to be the major consensus."

Christian sat down on the small steps leading up to the gates he would soon enter, looking like he might start to hyperventilate, which in this case would be a normal reaction.

"So, can I correctly assume that this favor you need has something to do with Mason being Strigoi?"

"It has everything to do with it." I sat down beside him, my hand automatically linking with his. "We both know that Mason did not like you when he was alive."

"Christian scoffed in seriousness. "There's an understatement."

"Even more so," I went on, "we know how much he did not like me being anywhere near you."

"He hated it." We agreed.

"And that animosity between you two was only fueled by the fact that I couldn't stay away, and I refused to give you up."

"I'm grateful for that, Bellamy. You know that I am. What are you asking from me?"

"I need you to help me lure Mason out of hiding. I have already discussed this with Dimitri, Lissa, and with the Guardian Council."

"Bellamy, you just agreed that Mason did not have any kind of good feelings toward me when we were in school. And now you are asking me to help you antagonize him as Strigoi?"

I half expected the 'Are you mad' question to come from him next. More than half expected it.

"That is exactly what I am asking you for Chris." I knew this wouldn't be an easy agreement either, but I was hoping it might be easier than Dimitri or Lissa. "I understand if you want to say no. It is a lot for me to ask of you."

Christian let go of my hand, putting his arm around me. "In the scheme of things," he reflected, "it's really not. You saved my life, Bellamy. You saved me in more ways than I know how to say."

"I did not do that then so that you would owe me any sort of favor now."

"That's not what I'm saying, Bells."

"I don't want you to say yes to me because you think you owe me something."

I could sense him looking up at me now. "Does the Guardian Council want you to bring him back?"

"If I can."

"What does that mean?"

I cleared my throat. "It means, if Mason has to die, so be it."

"Could you?" He questioned me, and I could tell that he found my response slightly detached and cruel. "Could you kill him?"

"Chris, if it comes down to him or me, I'll kill him. If it came down to a choice between you and him, I'd kill him without question. Without second thoughts."

"Good to know. When do we leave?"

I now felt that I could look back at him. "When we have a proper plan mapped out for us and the Guardian Council. And by we and us, I mean Guardians. Now," I stood, instructing him, "go and get some sleep."

I left Christian with more questions than answers between us, but I could find more answers later. I had too much on my mind to start sorting through more questions. I grabbed a golf cart from Alberta, driving back home. In the distance as I closed in on the Zeklos Court property, I saw Yuri sitting at the edge of the property, a good ten miles out. As I pulled to a stop, he looked as though he needed to talk, and I was not going to deny him any answers he wanted with everything going on. After I'd asked him to stay at Court with Jesse and Sophia, and after he left me and Christian alone, seeing the true intensity of our closeness returned, he had the right to any answers he wanted.

"We should talk." I said as he climbed in on the passenger side of the cart.

We were silent the first half mile onto the property, but Yuri started the conversation.

"Your connection with Christian…" He started slowly, his voice soft.

"Our connection feels stronger than before. It feels more tangible now."

"Did it not feel real before this? I've listened to you and Christian talk about each other, and your connection has always seemed real."

"No. It's always been real." I was trying to better explain what I was feeling. "But along with these returned memories, I also remember feeling like something has been missing between me and him. Like a missing puzzle piece." I tried for the best example. "There is always one puzzle piece that falls to the floor, and it takes time to find it. I feel like that piece is slowly returning."

"Do you….Are you still in love with Christian?" Yuri sounded so sad as he asked the question.

"No." I told my husband. It was bad enough that he had to watch and accept the returning full connection between me and Chris, but to think that I could be in love with Christian seemed ridiculous only to me. I took his hand, as the golf cart pulled to a full stop. "I've heard people say that you only get one true love in a lifetime, but I do not believe that anymore. I have had three, and you've had two. I am lucky to have once been in love with Mason and Christian. But, I am even luckier to have found you; the one man who has completed my love and soul, and will do so for the rest of my life."

Yuri was always convinced of my love for him. It was no lie to know how much I adored, loved, admired, and needed my husband, and we both knew it.

"When I returned to St. Vladimir's after I lost Mason, I was broken and incomplete. I was walking through a maze of pitch black, and on unsolid ground. I could not find my way forward, backwards, or out of the maze. But then I found your hand in that darkness," Yuri put his hand to my face, "and I was able to slowly take those steps forward. You led me back to a place where I could find light again. You are the person who kept me from free-falling. Christian is my best-friend, and I love him in that way only. But I will forever be in love with one man."

Yuri opened his mouth to speak, but closed it before doing so.

"I don't know what to say, Bells. I don't know any way to respond to that sufficiently enough to express how much I love you in the same way."

You never had to say anything, Yuri." I leaned over and kissed him, my hands both moving to the back of his neck, moving through his hair, and as we separated, my eyes meeting the silver and blue of his. "I have always known how much you love me."

"No man has ever loved you as much as I do." Yuri said. "And no man ever will."

"I believe that." I sat leaning into Yuri, finally feeling at peace in my life. There was only one more hurdle I needed to jump in order to find true peace and happiness.

As the light of day crept over the mountain horizon, Yuri and I were finally returning to our apartment, taking a few minutes first to check in on the kids, as well as Jesse and Sophie before they went to sleep.

"You were in pain." Jesse rushed to me as soon as I walked into the library Jesse was busy pacing in. "I felt it. It was unbearable. What's wrong?"

My hope that Jesse would feel nothing as Christian and I went through our memory regression, was dashed as soon as I looked into Jesse's eyes. He had experienced it all with me.

"I am so sorry Jesse." I moved into the room, closer to him.

"What happened?"

I told Jesse about the experiment Lissa, Adrian, and Sonya had attempted and finally succeeded at.

"After the pain lessened, you felt… I don't know." Jesse had trouble placing my emotions afterward. "You were changed. You were-"

"Complete?"

"Yes." Jesse agreed. "You feel whole." Jesse was on his way to sleep a short time later, content to know that I was feeling more like myself.

Yuri and I were also able to grab a few hours of sleep before my phone began to ring, along with the doorbell. Yuri was up out of bed before me, on his way to answer the door as I picked up my phone, looking at the callback number.

"Christian?" I answered, looking at the clock on the bedside table. "It's three in the afternoon. Why aren't you asleep?"

"I was hoping Yuri might let you come out and play." He offered.

The bedroom door reopening kept me from responding right away.

"They need us." Yuri was already grabbing his weapons as he changed into actual clothes.

"Who needs us?"

"Belikov, Castille, and the others."

I was upright and pulling on my own clothes in seconds. "Chris?" I spoke into my phone again, "I will have to meet you later tonight. I'm being called into a Guardian meeting."

Yuri surprised me by adding to my conversation. "Belikov says that if you insist on bringing Christian with you, he should know exactly what he is getting himself into. He should know all of the plan too."

"You get all of that Chris?"

"See you soon, Bells."

We hung up and I grabbed my stake and hoodie before Yuri and I were headed out the door. When we arrived, the entire group of Guardians I had assembled to go with me on this 'Mason mission', were all gathered in one of the larger strategy rooms.


	3. PART 3

**PART 3**

'O Divine Art of Subtlety an Secrecy! Through You We Learn To Be Invisible, Through You Inaudible, and Hence We Can Hold The Enemy's Fate In Our Hands-Sun Tzu, The Art of War'

"No." After Yuri and I entered into the planning and strategy room, I'd spent the better part of this last hour debating "trouble spots" in any of my potential plans with everyone. "We will find another way." Now, we were busy arguing the finer points of our stringent laws pertaining to Moroi being in the field, versus our possible need for a spirit user with us on the super-secret mission to "retrieve" Mason after it was suggested that we bring along a spirit user, more as contingency than as a concrete strategy.

"We do not need a spirit user, but you want to put another life at risk in case of some unnecessary unlikelihood that the spirit magic in our weapons is not enough?" I was arguing with Stefan. "You want to risk a Moroi life, a life that wouldn't be needed with us in the first place?"

"Isn't that what you are doing?" Stef referred to the fact that I was stubbornly bringing Christian Ozera along with us. I immediately changed the subject, unwilling to let the tension I was building up in myself explode just yet.

"The only spirit users at Court right now are the Queen, Adrian Ivashkov, and Sonya. I am not going to explain to all of the nosy gossip spreading Court individuals why we are taking Lissa away from Court, or for how long. Besides, the Moroi royal Council would never sanction anything like that." I left out the argument of also wanting to keep Lissa out of mortal danger, when I'd chosen to bring Christian with us. I didn't need anyone throwing that back in my face again and again.

"What about Adrian?" Eddie offered. He and Adrian Ivashkov had spent a two year span of time in hiding together, becoming relatively close friends over time. And even after that, the pair were still pretty close.

I still had to refuse. "I'm not putting his emotional or mental health in jeopardy for this. Think about what his being in that situation would do to Jill." I used the fact that Adrian and Jill were shadow-kissed to keep Adrian from this fight.

"And you are not going to ask Sonya for similar reasons." Yuri added, and I knew that he too was still ruminating over my resiliency to bring Christian with us.

"Sonya has been through enough." The debating continued for another twenty minutes before my attention suddenly shifted to the other conversation being had in the room. It was also another potential problem.

"We have to pin down his exact location first." Eddie said over more arguing Guardians, quieting them. "Then we can debate the rest." He was referring to Mason's exact location.

I sat down silently listening as others studied, disputed, and tried to determine methods of attack. When the door opened again, Christian arrived tentatively. Dimitri said something quietly to his Moroi before sending him to sit beside me. I was happy to have Christian beside me, the closeness we brought to each other, with our original bond returning.

"We know one thing for sure." Shane spoke up. "We know that he is in Dublin somewhere. All we need is an exact location to determine our perimeter, how to hit him, and how to keep the area clear of humans and public record."

Eddie and I can help with most of that." I mentioned, sliding away from Christian to stand at the table, across from Eddie. "Over the last six months, Eddie and I have been writing code and developing a new program for tracking."

Eddie reluctantly admitted to developing new software with me. "Recognition software is not the only program type that the Guardian Court retains and puts to use. Bellamy asked me about eight months ago, to help her come up with a way of making it easier to seek and find specific Strigoi that the Council has Guardians out looking for."

We caught each other's eyes, and smiled. Eddie and I had had a secret for eight months, and no one, not even Jesse, Sophie, or Dimitri had known about this.

"We found it absolutely impossible to improve on Bridgette's program, so we decided to design a new program that improved everything else." I said

"Eight months?" Shane eyed me and Eddie, unable to stay quiet about not being let in on our secret. "You kept this secret for eight months?"

"Eddie wanted to make sure that it was finished and fully operational before we took it to either Court."

"How does it all work?" Stef stepped in closer.

Eddie and I went to work, setting up two separate laptops, and pulling our program up onto our screens.

"I'm in." I told him.

"Me too."

We started typing, ignoring the commentary being had around us while we worked, studying and narrowing down our locations.

"I don't see anything in Dublin."

"Neither do I." I returned, slowly scanning the area Mason was said to be seen in the week prior. "I'll run the outlying cities and towns through the system." My eyes tilted up to Dimitri as he cleared his throat, looking more impressed from across the table. "It works much the same as Bridgette's program," I explained to him, "but ours gets closer, plus it is connected to the Court's facial recognition software, as well as all of the security cameras in the cities watched by the Guardian Court."

"Our program also moves faster than most others used by the Courts." Eddie added.

"When did you two get so good at computer programming?" Stef questioned us, and I heard Dimitri mumble a familiar phrase.

"A Guardian is never just a Guardian."

I smiled, but pointed to Eddie. "It was mostly Eddie. Turns out, he is a super genius at computers and software. Also, he can code faster than most Guardians at Court."

Eddie rolled his eyes as I complimented him.

"He is not in the outlying areas of the city either." I mentioned, running through our program features.

"Let's back up." Eddie suggested, meaning that he and I should expand our search area again.

"How far?"

"Won't checking city by city take too long?" Dimitri asked, and I caught the smirk cross Eddie's face.

"We don't need to search city by city with our program." I replied, keeping any complaints or sarcastic comments about our work out of Eddie's mouth. "Let's spread out. We'll do a country search."

Eddie nodded, looking up slightly at me, sensing what I had said to Dimitri was meant to silence him.

"Nothing." I said. "There is nothing."

"Are you sure your computer skills are as good as Bellamy claims?"

Both Eddie and I gave Shane dirty looks.

"He was in Ireland last week when the cameras caught him, but he has since fled that country."

"So," I saw Alberta sit beside Eddie, leaning in to examine his work, "you can get access to any city camera used by the Guardian Court?" She was as fascinated as Dimitri.

"Guardian and Moroi security cameras." Eddie corrected.

While the two talked about how the program worked, and all of its different uses, I kept my eyes on the prize, widening my search until my screen had full maps of every world continent and country, at my disposal.

"There!" I shouted, turning every head in the room. "Gotcha."

"Where are you?" Eddie was immediately concentrated again.

It took me another few minutes to answer him as I zoomed back in towards the stationary red dot that my search centralized on.

"I'm in Vienna." I tried keeping my confused tone quiet.

"Vienna?" But clearly I was not the only confused person in the room.

"How did he go from Ireland to Austria? That's an odd change of heart."

"No, it's not." I said, not giving any more information than that. The significance of the city was a closely guarded secret between me and Mason alone.

"We have to go now." Eddie stated firmly, before he moves again.

"He's stationary. It's day there." I looked at the time. "It's two am here, which means it is eight over there."

"Bells." Eddie and Shane must've figured I was procrastinating.

"If we left now, it would be six in the evening when we stepped off of the plane."

"And?"

"And I don't want anyone to know I'm going after him until we are right up on him. We can leave at one or two in the morning, and arrive in Vienna at noon. That would give us the time we need to get there, get set up, plan accordingly, and do our job correctly."

"In that case, I say we leave at ten tonight. We will get there at eight am…tomorrow?" Shane was hilarious when he tried to do math in his head. He made a good point though.

"Your math is right." I confirmed. "And ten is fine. The jet will take off at ten." I settled any debate that might be had, and as plans were made to leave sooner rather than later, I sat back down beside Christian, leaning into him as his arms circled me. I stayed quiet, half listening to the others while still contemplating more of a plan for the Council on my own.

"Silence is never pointless where you are concerned." Yuri sat with me and Christian.

I looked over to him. This man knew me so well, and I was not going to deny his observations. I was contemplating strategies and tactical control of the looming fight.

"There has to be a reason he has been able to go unseen for so long. How the hell has he stayed under the radar for so long?

"Besides the fact that we were under the impression that he had died in Seattle?" Shane overheard my questions. "We weren't looking for him because as far as we knew, he was…"

"It's more than that."

Dimitri was studying me still as I put pieces of another puzzle of information together in my head.

"I recognize that look in your eyes." He smirked smugly, knowing he had learned to read my expressions better over the years. "You're thinking philosophically. What are you considering?"

"I was thinking about logic and politics. More importantly, I was thinking about strategy. The big ball of weird in my head started mixing soccer plays with the strategic structures in 'The Art of War'."

Dimitri laughed out loud. "Only you would be clever enough to merge those two things together."

"It's borderline genius." Alberta agreed. "What exactly do you have in mind?"

I stood, moving back up to the table where Eddie and Stef had spread maps out.

"'All warfare is based on deception.'" I said. "In other words, in laying plans, we never let on what we have planned. We do not all six surround him in the field, and if he does show, we do not show our force at once."

Dimitri was leaning back in his chair now, grinning, his chin resting to his palm.

"Am I missing anything?"

He sat back up, his smugness still showing. "'If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles'"

This time I laughed. "You're quoting Sun Tzu to me?"

He shrugged.

"I'm impressed, Thor."

"Bells," Shane spoke again, "how do we all keep from surrounding and subduing the enemy?" I was not the only one who noticed that Shane had replaced Mason's name with the word 'enemy', but none of us said anything yet. "Wouldn't it be better, or wouldn't we have a better chance with more Guardians on the offense?"

"Of course it will be easier to subdue him with more Guardians, but no one, even Strigoi is daft enough to jump into the center ring of a fight with experienced Guardians. We need the element of surprise. Chris and I will be out in the open." I clarified. "We will bait the enemy into gracing us with his presence. I can antagonize him into an attack. I'm good at antagonizing others with my words." I winked at Christian and Dimitri. Yuri laughed out loud in agreement. "His attack first will provide me with cause to attack in return. Before I attack, Stef and Shane will be signaled to join the ambush."

"Bells, there is just one fault in your plan." Yuri had once referred to 'The Art of War' as my Guardian handbook. Like me, he knew it well. The word 'fault' was also a reference from the philosophical battle guide. I did not question, but waited for him to continue.

"Christian." He said. "I believe the phrase in war conditions goes 'over-solicitude for another exposes one to worry and trouble'."

The not so subtle reference to Christian was not lost on me. He would be the one I would worry about in a fight with Mason, or any Strigoi.

"It also exposes your weaknesses." Dimitri added.

"Christian." I said his name. "You are right to think that I don't want to see Christian in harm's way. I will worry terribly and my focus will be distracted. It is not just hesitation that gets you killed. Distraction can be one's downfall too."

"So, what do you plan on doing so that you are not distracted?" Christian asked, hoping I had an answer.

"The fact that I have even considered involving you in this fight, in any capacity does not sit well with quite a few people, including your Guardian." I met Dimitri's gaze again. "But, if anyone for a moment thinks that I would not have plans and multiple contingency plans in place before involving you, if anyone thought I would let anything or anyone hurt you, then they do not know me as well as was thought."

Dimitri acknowledged the truth in my comment.

"I am officially Jesse's Guardian. He absolutely comes first, but unofficially, I will also always protect Christian. I will do the same for Aaron, Jillian, and Lissa." I looked at the other Guardians around the table, and each one knew that I would stand between any enemy and all of our guarded Moroi. "Dimitri will grab Christian, and get him to a safe place as soon as Shane and Stefan are in place. Alberta, Eddie, and Dimitri will hold the perimeter in different positions." All five Guardians and Christian stayed quiet, possibly looking for flaws.

I was prepared for their confutations.

"We can make any changes to our plans, or add to them once we can properly see, and map out the area we will be in."

"What do we do about a spirit user?" The problem persisted.

And I had no real answer to my biggest hitch in the plan, so I shrugged. "We will either find a spirit user to bring, or decide on a better path before we board the jet."

The conversation went on much longer, as the Council had demanded our plans be recorded and appropriately delivered. Once finished however, most of us were in agreement about the way things would hopefully work out. Eddie however was not happy about the way I had managed to keep him from fighting, or going anywhere near 'the enemy'. I would hear much on this subject soon enough, but he was on his way back to speak with his Moroi, Jillian Mastrano-Dragomir before we would leave Court.

We all exited the strategy room, and I needed to talk to Jesse and Sophia. I had no clue what I was going to say to him, how I was going to keep him composed, and how I was going to ask him to keep any of this silent. Yuri was all for honesty in this case. Honesty in its most straight-forward way.

"I trust you." My conversation with Yuri was cut off at the quieter voice coming up on my left, fingertips touching to the lower strands of my hair. It was Dimitri. He looked apologetic. "I trust you with Christian."

"I know." I replied.

"I trust you absolutely with his life, as much as I trust myself or Rose."

I stopped walking, twisting to face my half-brother. "I know that you trust me, Dimitri. I also know that you are still skeptical about involving him. You know that he will always be our Moroi. You are his official Guardian, but he is equally as important to me."

"Sometimes I forget how close you two are." Dimitri reflected. "But, if anything God forbid, were to happen to Christian, I would be at fault."

"No, you wouldn't." I revealed. "That was one of the conditions to being allowed to involve Christian. The Council made sure I would take full responsibility. I have taken temporary accountability for Christian's health, life, and well-being."

Dimitri gave that all too familiar sigh. "You shouldn't have done that." He said.

"I did. It's done."

Two hands gripped my waist, keeping me standing in place as Yuri took a single step to his right.

"Hi Chris." I didn't need to turn to know that the hands holding me were Christian's.

"Hi." He said into my hair. "Can we talk?"

"Yes." I agreed, fully aware that I still needed to speak with him alone before we jumped on a plane to Vienna, away from my husband and his girlfriend, the Queen. "But first, I need to speak to Jesse. He needs to know what is going on. He needs to know why I am leaving him here at Court. Go and pack your things. I will meet you at Rose and Dimitri's apartment."

I pulled away, but was kept in place by his arms.

"This can't wait." Christian said, now pulling me away from Yuri and Dimitri.

"Okay." I let my eyes fall to the Guardians, signaling for them to go on without me. "Let's talk now Chris." The two of us walked in the opposite direction, my arm linked to his as we kept our silent bubble as long as possible.

"What's going on Christian?" I had to ask him after ten minutes. "What is so important that it couldn't wait until…"

"What if we didn't have to bring a spirit user to Vienna?" He inelegantly blurted out. "I know that you are trying to keep as much of your operation under wraps. Bringing other Moroi would complicate that."

I sighed, knowing he made a good point, but that I was still stuck. "But Chris, we might need someone with spirit to stake Mason. We need spirit magic."

"What if you don't." He was being annoyingly cryptic, and the look I gave him said that I had no time or appreciation for it. "Why can't you do it?" He questioned me. "Why can't you stake Mason yourself? He would never expect it from you." That just was not true.

"Because I'm not a Moroi, and because I don't have spirit magic."

"Exactly."

"Do I need to leave and come back when you make more sense?" I countered his obviously absurd question.

"I have a theory. Hear me out." He appealed to my reasonable side. "Spirit is the most obscure and improbable magic used by Moroi. But, what is more improbable or impossible than a Moroi with spirit?" He asked as though he expected an answer from me. "A Dhampir with Moroi magic. What you can do is far more implausible. You are literally the only person like you."

He was confusing himself as he tried convincing me that I could somehow maybe use my magic as a conduit to save Mason. He made some good points again, and I had to admit that at least most of us could give explanation to spirit magic at this point. That however did not change the most fundamental parts of this thought. Fire and spirit were different types of magic. Still…

"If you're not willing to take Lissa," a decision that Christian was ever so thankful I'd made early on, "and you don't want to risk the mental stability of Adrian, what are you going to do? What choice have we got Bells?"

"Even if you are right, even if I could counteract spirit through my impossible magical ability, I'm a fire user." I pointed out. "It could backfire. I could kill him. I could kill others. That is not a risk I'm willing to take either. There's got to be a better way."

We left it at that, but neither of us stopped thinking about the partially formed idea. It was something to think about, mostly because it was crazy enough to consider working. I could use Moroi magic, which made me even more impossible than spirit users these days. I would have to carefully bring it up to the others.

On the way back to the Zeklos residence, I quickly had to decide on the best way to tell my Moroi about this mission, and what it would mean for the long term. Honestly, I was not too keen to tell him so much, but with the chaos of things to come looming in the distance, he had to know. Sophie was still awake when I returned, the shades drawn, rocking Ivy back to sleep. Yuri was going to talk to her while I dealt with Jesse, but as I reached the door to his and Sophie's bedroom, I hesitated.

"Jess, "I moved into his room, sitting down beside him on the bed, "I need you to wake up."

He groaned, rolling over to his side away from me. "Bells, it's not even three in the afternoon yet."

"Yuri is talking to Sophie, and I don't have a lot of time sweetie." I could sense his anxiety now and I knew his eyes were open. He was listening. "I have to tell you what is happening right now. First I need you to know why we rushed from one Court to another without warning." I took a deeper breath, preparing to let him in on this reason.

"I have to assume you have some monumental reason that supersedes anything else. Aaron was quite put out by your demand that he and Shane return to Court immediately. They were on vacation in Switzerland." Jesse faced me, lifting up onto his elbow.

I made sure that my expression did not shift at the mention of Switzerland. "My reasons absolutely supersede any and everything." I said, looking down, willing my emotions to stay buried.

Jesse still winced, feeling more than I wanted him to again. "Bellamy, what is going on?"

"Budge over." I told him, laying down next to him as he made room, placing my head to his chest.

"Whoa. The last time you crawled into bed with me, you had bad news."

"Jesse," My voice cracked, "at the Guardian Court, I was shown a security video. It showed a Strigoi in Dublin."

"So?" He seemed to be urging me to get to the bad news quicker.

"We rushed to this Court so that I could show the video to some of the other Guardians here. Actually, we rushed here so that I could show other Guardians who knew Mason Ashford."

Jesse was running his fingers through my hair-an action that usually calmed us both.

"The Strigoi on the video was Mason." I made myself say the words, and Jesse sat up straight with me.

"Mason Ashford is dead. We went to his funeral. He died in Seattle, being reckless and stupid."

I told Jesse everything then. Well, almost everything. I intentionally left Christian out of my plan to go after Mason. If I told him I was bringing Christian with us, Jesse would throw one of his royal tantrums. I had not seen one of those from him in a long time, and I did not have the patience to deal with one now.

"Bells, are you going to kill him, or…"

"I don't know, Jesse." I answered the difficult question honestly. "I really don't know yet."

Jesse was feeling conflicted about what I told him, but he was also feeling protective.

"Okay," He faced me, "I am not usually so overemotional, but I am going to hug you now, Bells."

I lifted my eyebrows, not expecting the gesture from him.

"Don't be so shocked." He said. "This is one of those extraordinary circumstances things. You aren't leaving me here, so that you can run off somewhere nice and happy. You are going to fight Strigoi. You are putting yourself in close and mortal danger." He shook his head, sensing my dismissive demeanor.

"Please do not be so flippant about this Bellamy."

"I'm sorry." I apologized. "I get that this is not an easy situation, but it will be okay. I will come back. I promise."

"No." Jesse scooted closer to me. "Don't promise that until you are on the jet, on your way back here to Court."

"Okay."

He put his arms around me as I returned the gesture. Knowing that Jesse was not always a big hugger, this action and larger show of affection meant a lot to both of us.

"I need you to come back Bellamy." Jesse whispered. "Would you do me a favor?"

"Anything Jess."

He paused, "Would you call me when you arrive in Vienna? Your flight takes off here at ten, so with the time difference you should get to Austria around midnight. Six here."

Jesse was smart, and much to my surprise, he liked math. He always had mathematical answers before I did.

"Yes, I will call." I swore. "Now, go back to sleep." I smoothed strands of his hair away from his eyes. "I've got to go and pack before I finish up a few more last minute things."

"Seriously?" He was unlikely to take my sleep request without difficulty. "You think that I am going to sleep now?"

I leaned over and kissed his cheek. "Don't look at me like that. You'll get frown lines." I stood, but Jesse stayed sitting up, bringing his knees up to his chest. "I have to go, but I will find you before I leave." I left the room, and made my way through the still dark residence to meet up with Yuri in the front room, where he was still sitting with a concerned and somewhat distraught Sophia.

Unlike Jesse, Sophia was all for shows of emotion, whether they were extreme or slight. She rushed to me as soon as I entered the room, hugging me as Jesse had done.

"You don't have to go. This Strigoi mission is optional."

I sent Yuri a look of trouble. Had he told her that this mission I'd agreed to was optional? I could see why he might say that, but it bothered me that he had. Did Yuri feel that I had some sort of option in this case?

"It's going to be okay, Soph." I soothed. "I will call you and Jesse, and Yuri as soon we land in Austria, and then as soon as we are on our way back here."

"Jesse asked you to call." She put two and two together after hearing my comment, letting her arms drop. "He must be very worried."

"He is better now." I reassured. "Soph, you don't need to worry about this. I'm not going on my own. There are other Guardians coming along too."

"Those Guardians are not you and Yuri." She argued. "Bellamy, this scares me. What if something terrible happens? What if…"

"I also promised Jesse that I would find him before I leave. I will see you before I leave Court." I changed the subject quickly before she could finish her what if questions. "I promise this is nothing for you to be so worried over."

Once Sophia was less troubled over my impending absence, Yuri and I took our cue to exit, letting all of the Zeklos Moroi sleep soundly.

A short time later, Yuri was walking me to Rose and Dimitri's apartment. I had promised to meet Christian with his Guardian after I finished with Jesse, and he finished packing.

"Guardian Tverskaya." Both Yuri and I turned, unsure of which one of us was being requested. It was Jillian Mastrano- Dragomir, Lissa's half-sister. She was headed straight towards me and Yuri, with the same look of concern I had seen on Jesse and Sophie.

"Hello Princess." Yuri greeted.

I smiled at the young girl. "Jill, you really should be asleep."

"I spoke with Eddie." She said rather clearly, and I knew exactly why she was not asleep. "May I ask a favor?" She directed her question towards me, and there was no way I could refuse as she spoke.

Once our impromptu conversation with Jillian wrapped up, we were again headed in the direction of Rose and Dimitri.

"Are you going to do as she asked?" Yuri inquired about Jill's request.

"Probably." I said. "It would actually make sense. I was already worried about how he might react and respond when faced with the enemy." The 'he' I referred to was Eddie, and I would have to prepare myself for a bad conversation with him.

Yuri simply put an arm around me, doing his best to quiet the situation. After knocking on the apartment door, Yuri left with Stefan Chase, the two men happy and willing to get out of any line of fire when Dimitri and I talked.

"I asked Christian to meet me here." I informed Dimitri as he came to the door after Stefan.

"He called a few minutes ago. He is on his way now." Dimitri let me into his apartment.

"Where is Rose?"

"She is already packed for her trip, but Lissa had a packing emergency that requires the assistance of her Guardian."

"Which likely means that the emergency has nothing to do with packing," I pointed out, "and more to do with the other situation at hand."

"Most likely." He agreed. "Bells, while we have a few minutes alone, can I ask you something?"

I sat down on the couch in his front living room.

"Bells, this sighting of Mason, do you think this is really the first? It has been years. It is one thing to keep a low profile, but do you think the Guardian Council could've or would've kept any other sightings from you? It would not be the first time they have…"

"Do I think they have spotted him before this, and purposely not said anything to me or anyone else? No." I answered him. "They would not have kept this from me if they knew." I was resolute in my answer to him. "They would not be smart to keep something this important from me. Not after Brooklyn."

"Are you sure? They have…"

The knock on the door brought our conversation to a halt.

"Bells?" Christian's voice called, entering into the room.

"Christian." I called out his name as he rounded a corner, dropping one of his packed bags. "Are you properly packed?"

"The rest of my things are on the way to the jet." He took my hand with his, attempting to lead me back out of the apartment.

"We do not have much time left to prepare." Dimitri informed us.

"I need to talk to him alone for a few minutes." I let go of Christian, telling Dimitri in a quieter tone. "I need to know that he is doing all of this for the right reasons. I need to know that he is not doing this for me."

"Of course he is doing this for you, Bellamy." Dimitri pointed out an obvious truth. "We all are. I mean, we all want to help bring Mason Ashford back, but the truth is," his index finger brushed away a stray eyelash, "there are those of us who will rally without hesitation or question for you."

"Yes, well," I hesitated myself for a moment, "I also want to know that he is okay after regaining all of those compelled memories."

This Dimitri understood, and seconds later, I was pulled out the door, my hand linked with Christian, the two of us walking aimlessly through different areas of Court.

Walking through one of the royal gardens with Christian, I had not realized how quiet, or even how long I'd stayed quiet until Christian brought the silence up.

"Sorry Chris." I apologized.

"I would say that you must have something important on your mind if you're so quiet," my friend turned, "but you had a lot on your mind even before we started to recover memories of St. Vladimir's."

"How do you feel about all of that Christian?" I found myself asking him.

"Bells," He tried to cut me off, but I wasn't finished. I wanted specific answers from him. I did not want him to mollify my feelings like Dimitri and Jesse sometimes managed to do. "I know it is so much to process in a short amount of time, and I shouldn't expect you to have processed it all yet. That is why I am giving you an out on this mission. What we went through is a lot to deal with, and I am not going to push more onto your shoulders. It is not your job to do this sort of stuff in the first place. I've always taught you that, and…"

"Bells," He stopped me from starting to ramble, "do you remember a few years ago when you said that there was still a small part of you that would never fall out of love with me?"

I shot an uncertain look back to him, undecided about which direction he was taking this conversation.

"Well, when all of these memories started returning, gaps started filling in, and I recovered that same part within me. I had forgotten how deeply I had once loved you. I always knew I loved you, but now I know how much I really cared."

"Again Chris, I am sorry." I felt the need to apologize again. "If I had known then…"

"Don't apologize Bells." His hand touched mine. "It was my choice, remember? I have always loved you. That did not change because of a compulsion. But, forgetting all of the bad shit made it possible for us to move on. I was able to love Lissa, and you were able to love Yuri. You are happy."

"Where exactly are you going with this conversation?"

He gave a short laugh. "It's just that the last time I could recall these deep rooted feelings for you, there was no Lissa. There was no Yuri. There was just you and me."

"There will always be you and me Christian." I reassured my best-friend. "That never changes. You and I have learned over the years to become better friends with our bond, rather than two people in love, in a complicated relationship. I know that Lissa is worried." I made sure to let him know that I was not oblivious to his girlfriend's reservations. "She isn't just worried about your safety. She is also worried about you and I being so close while we are in Vienna. She and Yuri aren't there to keep an eye on us."

"So, is Yuri as worried about this dangerous adventure as Lissa?"

"Mm-hmm." I hummed, my thoughts all still jumbled and chaotic. "More so I think." I squeezed Christian's hand with mine. "In his case though, he is less worried about you and me, and more worried about me and Mason. I get the feeling he thinks that in my haze of anger, I'll shoot first and think later. Every once in a while he sees my emotions overriding my training and duty. He sees that once impulsive novice he trained, running head first into danger."

I half-laughed, thinking about the person I used to be.

"Are you going to kill Mason?"

"Christian!" I heard my voice full of shock, but realized that he was not the first person to ask me this question. Was I really so unpredictable?

"Are you?" He wanted an answer.

"Not if I can avoid it. The truth is, I want as many answers as everyone else." I turned a corner, pulling Christian along with me. "Let's go get Shane. I told him I would stop by the Drozdov homestead and pick him up."

Christian and I picked up a golf cart, taking the drive to where Aaron and Shane stayed while at Court. Our approach to the front doors was halted as a large Guardian stood under the frame, blocking our entrance.

"Guardian Pearce." The Guardian's stoic façade didn't fool me.

"Dom." I used a less formal and shortened version of Guardian Dominic Hartley's name.

We both smiled slowly as the façade of formality disappeared. Suddenly the big Guardian's arms were around my waist, picking me up into a friendly hug.

"How the hell are you, Bells?"

"I have missed you, Dom."

"Life at Court is a bore. You should convince your Moroi to move here."

"Not happening." I refused. "Is Shane still around?"

"Packing." Dominic and I separated, my eyes landing on Aaron, standing inside behind Dom.

"I am sorry that I have to take him with me."

"Are you?" I guessed that Shane had said more than was necessary, and Aaron was clearly not happy with Shane and I were walking into this dangerous situation either.

I moved inside, closer to the vexed Moroi, hoping that neither Chris nor Dom would take notice of the hesitation or the closeness Aaron and I still drew from each other after our time together in Switzerland. If I told Aaron more about what we were about to do, and why, he would understand. But, it was not my place to say.

"I don't want this mission on my hands. I'm more sorry than you know." I replied quieter. "I don't want to go. I don't want Shane to go.

"Can I ask why you are stealing my Guardian to pick up Strigoi? Why can't another Guardian go?"

"No. You cannot ask me why. You promised you wouldn't." I put my fingers to his wrist, forcing him to not only look me straight in the eyes, but to also find a calm place. "And I am not stealing Shane. I'm borrowing him. That means I will bring him back to you."

"Can I ask another question?"

"Sure." I granted, knowing there were things I couldn't say yet.

"When you and Shane say that you can't say where you are going, or why, do you really mean to say that you won't say?"

I couldn't disguise my smirk. Aaron was often as smart as Jesse, and as infuriating as it could be, their intelligence also meant that they knew when not to push some secrets kept by their Guardians.

"Can't…won't… Does it really make much difference in the end, Aaron?"

He shot me a look that I recognized without question. I'd seen it for the first time in St. Moritz, and a few subtly placed times since. "I'm sorry Aaron." I rested my hand gently to his face. "This is something that for the time being, needs to stay between a small group of Guardians."

He gave a nod. "You and Shane don't keep many secrets from me, Jess, or Sophie, so when you do we assume it is for our safety." His fingers then touched to mine. "I just want to say one more thing before you go."

"Anything."

"Be careful." His eyes were full of concern. "Don't do anything that will take you away from all of us."

I wanted to reassure him. I wanted to say that everything would be fine, and that we would all be back on Court soil before he knew it. Instead, I kept silent for a minute, my eyes glued to his. I could not pacify Aaron like I could Jesse or Christian.

"Okay." I agreed, rather than asking him not to worry. "No needless heroics."

"No needless heroics, no acts of martyrdom, no unnecessary feats of recklessness." Shane spoke up, entering the foyer, a bag packed and pulled over his shoulder.

"I see he gave you the same spiel."

"And I intend on heeding his advice this time."

I watched as the two said their very brotherly farewell for the next …undetermined amount of time. But, I was back in conversation with Dom and Christian when Aaron's arms wrapped around my mid-section, pulling me off to the side, his voice low, his gaze more mitigated.

"Be careful Bellamy. Whatever reason you've chosen to do this, I need you to be careful. Think before you act."

"I promise." I tried to stop him as he leaned down, kissing my cheek.

At nine-thirty, Guardians were already gathered in the hangar for this long flight to Austria. It was silent as Shane, Christian, and I arrived. Christian kept walking through the hangar to a group of more official looking Guardians. As they parted, I saw why he had not stopped. Lissa's flight was taking off before ours. He stood with her, reassuring and kissing her. I had not noticed that Rose and Dimitri were not far to Lissa and Christian's left side until Rose beckoned me over to speak with her as well. Reluctantly I stepped away from Yuri, Jesse, and Sophia for a brief time.

I was all too aware that this would be a conversation that should've come sooner. Her eyes were full of sympathy as I approached, and I did not like others looking at me with sympathy and pity.

"I want to say thank you before you leave."

Now I was confused. "Why should you need to thank me?"

"I…" Her voice was a strange blending of fear, guilt, and sadness. "I don't think that I could do what you are doing. I don't think I could face him like this. I don't know if I can forgive him."

My eyes wandered shortly to where Dimitri stood, feet away, allowing me and Rose to talk quietly. I smiled, knowing that he was still here with me, and part of my world, because of his own wife. If Rose had not been brave enough to go after him, he would still be lost to me and others.

I turned back to Rose. "Saving him, bringing Mason back as a Dhampir, doesn't mean that I forgive him." I clarified first. "It means that I will do what I have to do. But, you and I are more alike than we think, because of this situation." I gave a weak laugh. "I never could've faced Dimitri the way that you did when he was Strigoi. I never could've put that stake through his heart. It would've killed parts of my soul."

Rose laughed a little then too. "I'd like to think that I know how hard this must be for you, but I was not in love with Mason the way that you were."

"I think that if anyone comes remotely close to understanding how I feel, it is you. You may not have been in love with him, but…"

"Thank you." She interrupted.

Rose and I had a particularly productive habit of interrupting each other when we talked. It was as though we could speak in code. She and I could have full conversations this way.

"Does it change things?" She asked me the real question she had been waiting to ask.

"What?"

"Not being in love with him anymore. I was still in love with Dimitri before, during, and after. But you…"

"It is probably the biggest difference, but it changes nothing, morally speaking. It might be different or more difficult down the line, if and when Mason is Dhampir again, but not in any way that alters my life or my beliefs." My head turned to the side, watching Yuri as he spoke to Jesse and a Court Guardian. "I like to think that I've made peace with Mason and our past. He may not have died as we all assumed, but we broke up years ago. I have a husband who adores me, and I wouldn't be the person I am without him. I enjoy my life."

"Which is still hard to believe considering you are Jesse's Guardian."

We both laughed then, closing our conversation about Mason as Lissa sauntered across the way to us.

"Don't let him get into your head." She reminded me. "It's not him. And don't let him get ahold of you. While you are trying to subdue him, he'll be on the offensive. He will try to subdue you too. "

"I am not afraid of Mason Ashford. When I look into the eyes of my killer one day, they won't be his."

"Good luck in Austria." Rose quietly wished, taking only a few steps back to stand beside Dimitri while I faced the Queen once again.

"You will keep him safe, won't you?" The concern of the Queen was still in no way a surprise to me. "Please keep Christian safe. I honestly don't know what I would do if anything happened to him." Her comment suddenly sounded half concerned, half threatening.

"Nothing and no one will touch Christian Ozera. Lissa, I would give my own life before I ever let that happen."

"Let us hope it does not come to that either." Her hand rested to my arm, the same look of sympathy Rose had shown, now present in Lissa's eyes.

Both Rose and Lissa then boarded their royal jet, followed by a handful of Court Guardians joining them. I was happy to have a little more time with Yuri, Jesse , and Sophie.


	4. VIENNA

**PART 4: VIENNA**

I was in hell. Literal hell. My entire sense of concentration was gone. We'd been in the air for hours now, and the jet was too bloody silent and small. Eddie was keeping his distance, either angry, disappointed, or both with me after what I had done to him before take-off. Shane was doing his best to ease the conflict between us, but to no avail. Christian had tried sitting next to me, tried starting a conversation, but I was in no mood to find the simplicity of the situation ahead of us. I kept quiet for the most part too. And Dimitri was always quiet, and in his own thoughts before any battle. He was at the back of the jet, headphones in, his expression hardened and focused. He was so focused that I hesitated to move to sit beside him, ultimately deciding that I had no choice though. He only took notice of me when I put my hand to his forearm, taking his headphones from his ears.

"Hey Bells." He moved his arm from under my hand to my shoulders.

I rested my head against him. This was not easy on any of us, and I was about to make things harder and more uncomfortable.

"Dimitri, I need to ask you something. I need to pry into your personal life for a few minutes."

"What else is new?" He returned facetiously, allowing me to ask the questions I needed to.

"I need to ask you questions about when you were Strigoi."

"Bells." He removed his arm, shifting uncomfortably.

"I know." I disliked having to push him to relive the memories of that time in his life. "It's not the easiest subject for you to talk about. It isn't easy for me either. I hate to think of you like that. But you may be able to give me firsthand insight into more answers about Mason before we have to face this version of him.

"Okay." I could hear the difficulty in Dimitri's agreement. "What do you need to know?

"First, I need to know how you stayed off of the grid, especially in populated areas. How did you manage to stay off of the Guardian Court's radar?"

"Strigoi have their own technology and resources."

"Nothing as advanced as Guardians."

Dimitri gave a troubled look. "You're asking, how did I stay hidden without the help of someone like Bridgette?"

"Did you have help?" I had more questions. "Were there areas that you and others purposely avoided?

"A little of both."

I sat back, crossing my arms against my chest, considering the answers I was given. "The fact that Mason has kept himself off of our grids for so long means that he has become much more skilled at evasion."

"Which ultimately leads us to more questions." Dimitri commented, and I knew that he was trying to keep me talking, keeping my mind from my others troubles with Eddie and Christian.

But Dimitri did bring up a solid point. Suddenly, we had more questions than answers again.

"You didn't go home to Baia when you were Strigoi. Was that an intentional choice?"

I didn't have to look over to my brother to know that my question had confused him.

"Is Vienna significant to Mason in some way that you aren't saying?" He changed the subject, turning it around to me now.

"Yes." I told him, feeling my chest tighten with guilt and grief all over again. "Vienna is as significant as Dublin."

"Start with Dublin." I was instructed. "What aren't you telling me? What aren't you telling us?

I half smiled. "Dublin is easy. It's where I went to school before St. Vladimir's. It's where I grew up, had a life before Mason, and It's where Jesse and I disappeared to until his graduation. It isn't impossible to imagine me or Jesse wanting to stay invisible for as long as possible, especially considering the trouble we caused or took blame for in Montana."

"And Vienna? What is so important about Vienna?"

I was saved, stopped from answering Dimitri's question while Shane sat down across from us.

"What if he wants to be seen by Guardians now? What if he has come out of the shadows so to speak, for a reason?"

We had to consider Shane's inquiry seriously.

"What kind of reason?"

"He was in Dublin before Vienna." Dimitri was in deep thought again. "St. Sebastian's is in Dublin."

"Just on the outskirts." I confirmed.

"But you and Jesse haven't been in Dublin for years now."

"But the assumption could be that we would've decided to stay in Ireland?" I had to question Shane and Dimitri's hypotheses. "Son of a bitch!" I shot up from my seat, practically sprinting down the aisle, passing both Eddie and Christian, both brooding and still upset with me.

I picked up one of the phones near the front of the jet, dialing a memorized number.

"Dane?" I spoke when he picked up his cell phone.

"Hey Bells." He had finally stopped calling me Barbie. "Mom and dad said you left Court without Jesse. Where are you? What's going on? Why would you leave Jess…"

"Nothing I can discuss." I was not about to divulge anything to him. "I need you to answer an important question for me." He waited before I summoned the courage to ask and hear the answer. "When you were on vacation in Dublin a few years back, when you were hurt by that Strigoi, do you recall what the Strigoi looked like?"

"You're just asking now?"

"Dane." I used a warning tone, and he apologized. "Male or female?"

"Male."

"Good. Do you remember hair color?"

"Ginger with a bit of brown mixed in."

"One more question. Did he look like he had been Dhampir or Moroi before he was Strigoi?"

"What kind of question is that Bellamy?"

"A valid one if you can recall the details. Please think back."

"Dhampir, I guess." Dane hummed softly as he tried to remember details from a terrifying experience. "If you need details, his upper body was broader than a Moroi."

"Dane, thank you." I stopped him from providing in depth details, fearing it might send him spiraling into more fear.

"When are you coming back?"

I exhaled slowly, keeping my voice low. "Soon sweetheart. I will be back soon."

I listened for a few short seconds as Dane breathed into his phone, not fully accepting my response.

"Dane, I have to…"

"Bellamy, whatever you are doing, whatever it is you won't discuss with Jesse and Sophie, be careful. Don't do anything stupid."

"I promise Dane." I hung up the phone, staying put with my back to others, gathering my thoughts as I stared down at my shoes. I needed to recover any composure and semblance of a poker face I could manage before I returned to my seat.

"What was that about?" Shane asked as soon as I was back beside Dimitri.

I didn't answer right away, mostly because I could not be sure of my hunch yet. But as I started to put more pieces together, little things that had not made sense to me before, and things that I had not considered before now, started to come together. And they were all starting to pique my animosity and my pragmatism.

"Bellamy." Dimitri touched my hair with his fingertips, gaining my attention again.

"Dane Zeklos and his friends were surprised by a Strigoi in Dublin shortly before my wedding. The Strigoi that hurt Dane was male, likely a former Dhampir, and had red hair." I mentioned to the men with me.

Shane caught on pretty quick. "You think it was Mason?"

"I don't think it is out of the realm of possibilities." I leaned back, furious at the idea that Mason, even a Strigoi version of him, would go after a member of my family.

And while I thought on the matter, growing more and more agitated, I was thrown another challenge. Eddie was standing over Shane, the two quietly talking while Eddie glared every few seconds at me, mild contempt written in his eyes. This petulance of his would not do. I stood back up, indicating for my friend to follow me.

"We need to talk."

"If our talk has anything to do with your reasons for keeping me from fighting, we don't need to talk."

"It's not about that." I said. "We need to talk."

"Fine." My friend followed me to the back room of the plane, used mostly for injured persons. I entered after Eddie, locking the door behind me, blocking it as I turned.

"I lied." I said, watching him grow more irritated..

"Let me back out of here."

"No."

"Bellamy, move."

I continued to block his only exit. "You'll have to physically move me."

I saw his eyes briefly contemplate his best decision, wisely choosing not to touch me.

"What is going on with you?" His tone was angry. Resentful. "Why are you acting like such a…"

"Say it." I dared him. "Finish that sentence. I'm acting like a controlling bitch. You're damn right I am. And you need to hear why. You need to hear what I have to say."

"I've heard what you have to say. I am not as detached from the "target" as you and Shane. You're afraid I'll hesitate. You don't trust me."

"Of course I trust you." I let my guard down. "Ed, I haven't told you everything about why I made this decision. Please stay and listen."

Eddie suddenly looked less confrontational. "I'm listening."

"I spoke to Jillian before we boarded the jet. She came to me." I informed him. "She stopped me and Yuri. If you had seen or heard the fear in her, you would understand. You are more than just her Guardian. You made the decision to tell her where you are going and why. She is afraid of losing you, and she is not the only one." I swallowed hard. "I've lost you before Eddie. If I lose you in a fight, no matter who it is with, I won't get you back. If I lost you in this fight, it would ruin me. I'm not saying that I would not put you in a fight. You are a great fighter. This was not an easy decision for me. I knew it would cause conflict."

"But you still think that I can't separate myself in this situation."

"It's bad enough that Mason has an arsenal of information to use against me, and he will. When face to face, he will attack me in any and every way that can potentially hurt me. I will not let him use you against me, and I won't let him confuse you too."

Eddie was still somewhat defiant when Dimitri knocked on the locked door, but he was now listening.

"The pilot says we are starting our descent. Come on out."

"Are we done?" Eddie questioned. "Are you going to let me out?"

I unlocked the door, moving to the side. This time, Eddie sat across from Christian, still brooding, and looking as though I had offended him in some way, but at least I had been honest and given him my justified reasons for keeping him away from Mason. A short time later, our plane touched down on the Austrian runway. We were still a short distance outside of Vienna, but that much closer to our Strigoi target.

"Our base is a fifteen minute drive from here." Stef informed me, disembarking, loading bags into the waiting SUV's waiting for our use.

We would be staying at a former Monestary, hidden on the southern border of the city limits, but impossible for Strigoi to breach. It was still considered hallowed ground, so keeping Christian inside would keep him safe. Our plan was to get settled into our borrowed rooms, and meet up to map out our plan of attack at sunrise. Eddie and Christian were still not on full speaking terms with me, so I rode to our destination with Shane and Dimitri. Once arrived to Heiligenkreuz Abbey, it was decided that Christian and I would share a room. I shrugged indifferently, noticing Christian did not seem to mind either. Dimitri and Eddie were paired together, as were Stef and Shane. Alberta was the only one to find a single room. We were less than thirty minutes from the Vienna city limits, tucked away in a small but noticeable part of the Vienna woods. And the best part about staying at the Abbey, was its rule of silence, designed to be strictly obeyed within its walls. This meant I didn't have to hear Christian and Eddie bitch about whatever decisions I made. I could concentrate on this mission, and everything that would come with it, in silence.

"Alright Bells." Christian closed the door of our monastic room, the tenor of his voice changing, "you need to talk to me."

"Shh." I silenced. "There is a rule of silence here." I reminded him with a whisper, placing my bag to the foot of the bed I chose near the window. "Unpack and rest. We have work to do later."

"Tell me what is going on." Christian continued.

"What do you mean?"

"Bellamy," He sat at the edge of his bed, using the same warning tone Dimitri used when I pushed him too far, or when I wasn't listening. No doubt Christian had heard the tone enough from his Guardian too, "you haven't said a word to me since we left Court."

"That's not true." I attempted to justify my short monosyllables or hummed responses on the plane ride. And I intentionally had not spoken to him in the last several hours, believing he was cross with me.

The look he sent across the room spoke many volumes. "It has been exactly four hours since you said a single word to me. It's been radio silence between us for nearly half of that plane ride. What gives?"

On instinct, I moved to his side of the room, sitting close to him. His arms held me closer in place, and I felt warmth return to us.

"Tell me what is going on with you Bells. You are never distant from me, even in the worst of situations."

"I'm scared Chris." I could see the nihilism in his eyes. "I'm afraid to walk out there. I'm afraid of seeing him again. I'm in an argument with Eddie because I don't think he can disconnect from one end of the spectrum to the other, but it's me who is afraid to face either version of Mason Ashford. I'm…scared. I'm properly scared."

"Nope." Christian wasn't buying it. "There's more to it than that." Shifting me from beside him, he stood, crossing to the opposite end of the room. "There is something you're not telling me."

"Chris."

"No way. You are not afraid of Strigoi. You're Bellamy Pearce. You are the wife of Yuri Tverskaya, the niece of Bridgette Pearce, the half-sister of Dimitri Belikov, and you are the badass protector of Jesse Zeklos, a Moroi who now sings your praises. Who would've expected that?" He made me smile. "You aren't afraid of anything."

"I'm afraid of this."

"Why?" He truly wanted to know, because until he did he could not believe my fear was real, or even a consideration.

"I've lost too many people in my life already. I lost Mason, or thought I had, and then Dimitri, I lost Bridgette, and I have come too close to losing you, Yuri, and Eddie on multiple occasions. Back at St. Vladimir's, I could defeat Mason one on one without trying most days. He is Strigoi now. He is stronger, faster, very irrational, and more unpredictable. He is dangerous to us all. He won't hold back, and I'm afraid that if I don't fight, someone I love will be killed. But if I do fight him, I might actually kill him. How do I reconcile either side of that challenge?"

I felt my hands starting to shake as Christian held them, his sympathy for my situation on higher alert.

"You don't. You can't reconcile those arguments, Bells. Come here." He kept hold of my hands, leading me to my bed. He laid down on his side, letting me curl up next to him. It had been so long since he and I had been this close, and it still felt natural to both of us. Sleep came to me for a few hours, until my phone rang just before dawn. Dimitri was as ready as I was to start formulating a more solid plan. I let Christian stay asleep, hoping he would sleep most of the day. I met Dimitri and Stef outside of the Abbey walls where we could talk openly but privately.

"This whole vow of silence thing is mind-numbing. Who chose this place as a base of operations?" Stef was already complaining.

"The Queen." I pointed out. "She thought it might be good idea for us to settle in a place of peace, to gain better perspective, considering the job ahead of us."

"I agree with her." Dimitri spoke in a still softer tone.

"While we have these hours of daylight, we need to go over this plan." Shane and Eddie arrived ten minutes later. "Do we have the maps of the city?

I handed over a stack of our maps to the two men who went straight to work.

"We do have another very challenging obstacle." Alberta also joined us. "Did anyone happen to see the posters and flyers along our drive here?"

"The Opera Ball." I had seen the posters littered along our drive, thinking about how disappointed Jesse would be, knowing that he could not be here for that experience. "Tonight is the start of the Vienna Opera Ball. It is the premiere Ball of the season, it takes up a lot of space in the city center, and there are other performances throughout other areas."

"How much space does an Opera actually take up?

"This one takes up blocks. Whole buildings. And, the main area that everyone gathers into is also exactly where we need to be to draw out Mason sometime in the next few nights.

"The Palace." Dimitri confirmed, both of our brains going into strategic overdrive.

"Our main plan hinges on not drawing attention to ourselves, and not frightening the Viennese people and tourists who may be out."

"Can we get around the event?" Shane asked. "If we don't get out there tonight to get a feel for the area…"

"If we don't get out there tonight, we won't be seen." I explained. "I need Mason to know me and Christian are here. Maybe we can use the Ball to our advantage. Strigoi won't stay away from an opportunity this easy. They are less likely to attack in a crowd such as this, but they will still hunt."

"They will follow their prey throughout the night." Dimitri followed up on my thought, bringing his own detailed knowledge to us.

"We just need to make sure that Chris and I are that prey."

We followed up all of our thoughts and ideas with a short trip to the city center, mapping out the streets, alleyways, and buildings we could use to our advantage.

"It goes without saying that we do not break anything here, especially the buildings." Dimitri made another point to say.

"Especially Hofburg Palace." I added. "It's nearly as old and revered as Moroi Court. It is the seat of power in this country. We do not need to piss off the Austrian Government."

After many hours of talking, mapping, and planning, our first plan was set, our minds and bodies being prepared. Christian was still asleep when I returned to our small intimate room, so I chose to take a walk through the Abbey. Everything and everyone remained perfectly silent within the walls. No tourists were present at the Abbey during this time of year, so I was grateful for that as well. If I were not looking to face Mason, and either kill him or bring him back, this was the sort of place that would put my mind at ease. It was a place to reassess choices and priorities, as well as relieve stress, or seek contemplation. For the next week, I found different places around the monastery to sit in silence, attempting to make a very difficult decision. The Guardian Council had insisted I keep a running record of what occurred on this mission, so I sat, journaling things we had or had not seen, things said, the important changes to our plans or ideas, and my own thoughts on this mission.

NIGHT 1: NOTHING. SUBJECT REMAINS UNSEEN.

NIGHT 2: STILL NOTHING. BOREDOM SETTING IN ALREADY. THE SILENCE IS WEIGHING HARD ON ALL NERVES.

NIGHT 3: ONE STRIGOI CONFRONTATION NEAR CITY'S CENTER. FEMALE STRIGOI. OUR ATTEMPT TO SUBDUE HER WENT SIDEWAYS AS SOON AS SUBJECT GOT CLOSE TO GUARDIAN REYES, GOING FOR HIS THROAT. STRIGOI WAS ELIMINATED.

NIGHT 4 AND 5: ALL'S QUIET ON THE "HOMEFRONT". FRUSTRATION AND BITTER JUDGEMENT INCREASING THE LONGER WE ARE HERE, LOOKING FOR A NEEDLE IN A HAYSTACK. THINKING THE SUBJECT MAY HAVE MOVED ON, BUT ASKING EDDIE (GUARDIAN CASTILE) TO HELP WITH THE COMPUTER SEARCH SEEMS UNLIKELY RIGHT NOW. OUR BOREDOM IS CAUSING SMALL PETTY DISAGREEMENTS (AND CHALLENGING MOMENTS) AMONG GUARDIANS (AND MOROI).

As I sat filling out a notebook full of paperwork and thoughts for each Council member(because there was little else to do besides train and plan during the day while others slept), a familiar shadow approached, blocking out any sun I felt overhead.

"Can I ask a favor?"

I wanted to laugh, or at the very least, scoff at his request.

"Ask anything. After all these years Dimitri, you shouldn't need to ask. What sort of favor would you like?"

"One of kindness." My half-brother sat across from me. "I am asking you to look beyond…everything you are wrestling with, emotionally. I am asking you to show the compassion I have always seen in you."

I recognized the pause in his words, understanding immediately what he was asking for, and why he was asking. "You don't want compassion. You want clemency." I reworded his diplomatically spoken words. "You want me to show mercy to Mason."

"Yes."

"Because you are all so certain that I won't. You think you're the first to question me?" I had trouble holding back my arguments, tired of my motives being suspect. "You are all so sure that I will act before thinking; that I'll fall back into that pattern of recklessness you once saw in the novice I once was, because it is him I'm facing."

"No. I'm not sure what to think, Bells." Dimitri argued back. "For the first time in a long time, I don't know what you are thinking. None of us does."

"This might be hard for you to believe Dimitri, but I still have a heart when it comes to Mason. This is not easy for me to think about. It's difficult for me to resolve any choice I make. I won't kill him unless I have to."

"Unless you have to?"

The inquiry was putting me further on edge.

"I don't understand why you should all of a sudden think that I might give up on the laws and lessons I choose to follow as a Guardian. The idea that I could kill without considering the consequences…"

"But you could kill him," It was Eddie's voice cutting through my words now, rounding a nearby corner, adding to this current debate of conscience, "couldn't you?" He was more accusatory than inquiring, and I had to be upfront with my own thoughts.

"If it came down to him or me, I will protect the people in my life who need it. I'd give my life for the people I care for, but I will take out the threat in the process."

"The people you care for." Eddie grew contemplative. "Is this about Christian still? We are back to that stupid love triangle all over again. You are not Christian's Guardian." He made sure to remind me.

But his last sentence only fueled my own frustrations. After all these years, my best friend still did not get it.

"Yes Eddie, this is about Christian. It's also about you, and Yuri, and Shane, and Dimitri. Most of all, it is about Jesse."

"Jesse is back at Court. He's thousands of miles from here. Admit it Bellamy, this is about you and Christian versus you and Mason all over again. You can't make up your mind. You may have been in love with him, but you've also always had feelings for Christian." Eddie finally confronted me about this subject. It had taken him years to say anything because there was never a need to, but with Mason no longer dead in the way we'd thought, pent up frustrations and ideas were resurfacing.

"So what if I have?" I shot back at him. "Yes, I was very much in love with Mason. But, I also fell in love with Chris. That was a long time ago, and now the truth has changed. The truth is, Mason lied to me. He lied to all of us, and it puts my mind at ease. It is what will help me concentrate and face him. I can't focus on the past version of him."

"And you won't put me into this fight because it is your personal and professional opinion that I might not keep my concentration. You think I will drop the ball."

"Exactly!" I swore louder than normal, lowering my voice as soon as Dimitri tried stepping in between us. "Jesus Eddie, if you or I , or any of us hesitates for even a second because we are not able to see and separate Mason from this thing he chose to become, then all of this planning, all of this work, and the entire fight goes to hell. This is not your first Strigoi. You know how this works. If you hesitate, he gets by you. And if he gets by you, we lose. He gets to others like Christian and Jesse, and Jill."

"Leave Jill out of this. Jill isn't here either. She and Jesse are not here." I had clearly hit the right nerve.

"But that only adds to my point Ed." I used my most calming pacifying tone. "I am Jesse's first line of defense in a situation like this. Even if he is not with me, he is at the forefront of my mind always. I fight for him. You fight for Jill. No matter how far apart we may temporarily be, no matter what the threat is, we protect them."

"Well argued Bells." Dimitri finally spoke up again. "When it comes to someone we know and love, fighting, the actual fight itself becomes that much more difficult." He defended. "After listening to her reasons, her strategies, and mindset, I must agree with Bellamy. If I found out that Bridgette or Ivan were Strigoi, I would willingly remove myself from the fight. The Council has not given Bellamy that option."

"Conflict of interest." Eddie agreed. "I get it. But why is it a conflict of interest for me and not her?"

"Because," Shane and Stef both rounded the corner, "she was in love with him." Clearly both were also unable to sleep. "She would've jumped in between Mason and that Strigoi in Seattle if she'd been there. She would've risked her life for his. And, she is doing the same thing for Jesse, Christian, and others now. She is making the difficult choice we are all faced with at some point as Guardians."

I felt my cheeks redden from tears falling again as Shane spoke, clearing up any debate, and explaining everything I couldn't with clarity and definition.


	5. BATTLE LINES

**PART 5: BATTLE LINES**

" _Let there be no more war! And straight away at the word, along the Mediterranean shore, the call to arms is heard."_ I spoke the familiar words I knew, unprepared for another confrontation with Eddie as he sat down beside me." We were all preparing for another night of strategic placement, and Strigoi watching.

"I don't want to fight with you, Eddie." I whispered, folding my hands together at my lap.

I listened as he took in a deep breath. "I don't want to fight either, Bells. I want to apologize."

"Why?"

"Because I don't want to go into a possible fight, already having a fight with someone I love. And because you were right."

"About what?" I stood, walking a few steps away.

"You were right about keeping me from this fight. I have trouble separating our Mason from this present evil one. He was like a brother to me. He was once the closest person to me. But if I had to choose between him and Jill, I would choose her every time. For years we've had our questions go unanswered and now with the possibility of finding answers, I don't know if I want them anymore.

Eddie and I sat, whispering in conversation a little longer, trying to still determine where we stood with Mason and his undead reappearance, but we had no concrete answers. I was startled when my phone rang, swearing I had set it to vibrate, and if it were anyone else, I might not have answered.

"Are we too late?" I heard Yuri's concerned voice ask as soon as I picked up.

"We?"

"Jesse and Sophie are here, along with Aaron and Mia."

"You're not too late. We finished up multiple sweeps of the area again today and mapped out a new perimeter. It's five here, so we'll wait another few hours, and see if we can't get anything. We are still competing with the Opera Ball."

There was a sudden rustling on the opposite end of the phone call before a new voice started to talk.

"Bells." His voice was a comfort to me now, but I could still sense his worry, his fear, and it was drilling little holes into me.

"Jess, calm down. Your anxiety is too much for me." I pleaded with my Moroi. "Have a seat, hold Sophie's hand, listen to Yuri, and do not worry."

I could almost feel him inhaling and exhaling as I listened. It was similar to the times I could put my head on his chest and listen to his heartbeat.

"Have you gone through reciting all of your quotes yet?" He questioned my pre-training and pre- battle routine. "Because I found a statement you could add to them." I said nothing, unsure of what to expect from Jesse. But I listened. "I hated every minute of training, but I said 'Don't quit. Suffer now and live the rest of your life as a champion.'"

"I like it." I returned finally. "Whitman? Tennyson?"

"Muhammed Ali."

I laughed with Jesse, our moods lightened marginally, taking in my own deep breath as the other Guardians and Christian all started to gather a distance away from where I sat.

"I have to go Jess. I'll call back soon. Kiss Sophie for me."

Christian and I made sure that we were seen again. It was close to nine, and the city center of Vienna was packed with people in their finest Opera wear. Tonight was the main event, and no less than three- thousand people were in attendance. We didn't exactly blend into the scene, but fortunately formal wear was optional. The lights around us flickered once or twice as we sat at an open café across the street from Hofburg Palace. Dimitri was a few yards behind me and Christian; close enough to grab and dash if need be. We still had a few hours before the crowds would thin out, and the Ball would come to its nightly end, so I relaxed. While I would not allow him to take part in the battle, Eddie did have a perfect view of any and everything that might occur from where he hid in position as well. I'd tactically positioned Stef and Shane inside of another building on the opposite side of the square, both waiting for hours before I would give any kind of signal. By midnight, I had gone through three cups of very strong coffee, and still we saw nothing. Alberta was in charge of the security cameras, watching video of each city center section that cameras recorded, not only looking for Mason, but any Strigoi on the hunt.

"Let's take a walk around the square." I suggested to Christian, knowing that we were well watched, and that Dimitri would manage to follow at enough of a distance. I took Christian's hand, crossing the now more vacant street, walking with him in silence. My heart was racing, and my eyes surveyed every direction, every corner, and every dark shadow I could see without being obvious, hiding my own fear and concern from Christian as he seemed to observe my alarm.

Our relationship had changed many times in so many ways since my arrival at St. Vladimir's, and I could sense another one of those changes coming. Things were still a little strange between us since the reversal, and to my own surprise, it was me not Christian who was having trouble adjusting.

"I've missed you, Bellamy." He sat on the edge of a large circular fountain, holding both of my hands as I stood in front of him, absent from the moment. "What's going on in your head right now? What are you thinking about?"

"Nothing Chris. Really." I lied, trying to suppress each of the ten-thousand thoughts going on in my mind.

"Bellamy, I can always tell when you are worried about something. Dimitri is right. Your eyes still give you away."

"Fine, I am worried." I sat down with him, keeping his hand linked with mine. "But I was thinking that it isn't so difficult for me to understand why Yuri and Lissa might be somewhat apprehensive about you and I teaming up like this, instigating trouble or violence from Mason all over again.

"Yuri is worried too?" Christian asked, and it made me think that he and Lissa may have had more than one conversation about this plan.

"Yes. Yuri is worried too. Jealousy is a useless emotion in our relationship, but before we left Court, Yuri asked if my feelings for you had resurfaced. I clearly explained that he will never have reason to worry, and neither will Lissa."

"Yuri is an extremely lucky man."

"I happen to agree, but I think that I got the better deal."

"Sure. Whether it's at Court or anywhere else, he is your husband, and you get to be his wife." I wasn't sure if the comment Christian made was to me, or one of those thoughts we accidentally have out loud. I let him go on, wondering however, which road his thoughts were taking him down.

"That is the way it will always be seen to everyone around you.

And it hit me, clear as day, in the face. Even ignoring his last name, and the stigma his parents and Aunt Tasha left with him, things were not the same with him and Lissa. Even if his surname were different, the Moroi Court would always see Christian as one thing. Lissa was Queen, so there was only one word that was used to describe Christian. Consort. It was a word with just as many stigmas attached. While he could petition for the title of 'King Matrimonial', the Moroi Council likely would not agree. Even if Christian and Lissa were to marry, even if they produced children together, and proclaimed their love every day for the rest of their lives, it would not change Christian's new title.

"Chris, Lissa loves you more than anything. In her eyes, you are everything. Nothing compares, and nothing could replace you in her life."

"In her eyes, yes. In your eyes, in Dimitri's, Rose, Yuri's too. But to everyone else…"

"Screw everyone else. The lot of them."

I watched him lower his head, and exhale. "It was the same when you and I were together years ago." He mentioned. "I was never actually seen as the one you were in love with. No one else knew how much you really loved me, and how much I loved you."

"Why should that have mattered?"

"I knew. You knew. Others assumed they knew, but I was the consort then, and I am the consort now. Story of my life."

"Stop it Chris." I demanded quietly as we walked. "Stop feeling sorry for yourself. You're being ridiculous. These resurfacing emotions are confusing you. You love Lissa and she loves you. That is the only thing that should ever matter. If Yuri and I weren't married, it would make no difference. I love him and he loves me. That is all we need to know. The rest of the world doesn't concern me."

"I hoped I might see you here soon." My conversation with Christian was instantly halted as we both heard the words spoken from the shadowy area to my right. "Which would imply you've been looking for me. And I see you brought your boyfriend." Slowly, he stepped out into the moonlight, and all of my inner strength waned.

My knees weakened and my breath caught in my throat. I could hear Dimitri in my ear, telling others to keep their positions. Chris and I were not the only ones to have spotted and heard Mason.

"Are you ready?" Mason was speaking directly to Christian as I kept pulled him around to my back, looking for any opportunity to attack. "Are you ready to take your place with us, and-"

My arm kept Christian in one place, unable to shift in either direction around me. "You don't want to try this." I was only going to warn him once. "You don't want to try getting between me and Christian. You'll never make it to him. I will enjoy the fight, and I am not so inclined to kill immediately."

Mason laughed a rougher and sinister laugh. "You always were arrogant, and you were always so protective of this Moroi." This was not Mason's voice. It wasn't him I kept telling myself. This was evil, coming to tear apart my family and all we'd built.

"Did you run right to him?" The question hit me and Christian. "When I was gone, did you run straight to the Moroi you love? Did you wait even a day before I was out of the picture? Poor Vasilisa." Mason antagonized. "I bet she never saw you coming."

My chest burned with anger, sadness, confusion, guilt, and provocation. I recalled the day, the exact moment that Bridgette told me that Mason was gone, but I would not give him the satisfaction of knowing what his death had done to me.

"Stop."

Mason took a step closer, and I felt Christian trying to shift. My hand grasped his, keeping him at my back, and quelling his anxiety and fear.

"Do you expect that you can hurt me at this point? You think I'm unprepared for what you might say? I got over you and moved on long ago."

"I can see that."

I ignored his baiting comments.

"Nothing you say or do is going to make me run. And nothing you say will change what I have to do."

"Good to know." Mason took another step towards us.

Even now I could read his body language. I could still read his thoughts in a fight.

"Christian." I whispered his name, and he was ready to do what needed to be done.

It was fantastic coincidence that Chris and I shared a room, rather than Chris and Dimitri. It gave the two of us a chance to discuss any contingency plans of our own, away from other Guardians. In a split second, he was at my side again, our hands still linked. We were going to save ourselves, surrounding the two of us in a ring of fire, daring the Strigoi to come closer to either of us. Mason growled, and it was feral, coming from a place deep within him. It was predatory and merciless. He was positively irate. In fact, I was surprised that he wasn't willing to attempt jumping through fire to get to us.

"What's the matter? Are you afraid?" Maybe Mason couldn't bait me, but I could still provoke him in return.

I did, giving Shane and Stef the opportunity to use stealth as they moved out of the building they were positioned in for hours. The two made it halfway to us before being detected. Mason twisted his neck back to me.

"So, you did bring the troops with you." He was taunting. "Didn't think you could handle me on your own?"

I smirked, giving a nod to the two Guardians. Mason's attention was on Shane, his outrage and challenges giving me a chance to drop my magic to literally get Christian out of the fire.

"Chris, go now." He and I were weakened after our use of magic, but Dimitri was not far. He's snuck up closer to us, moving in and out of his own light and shadows. "Run straight back until you run into Dimitri. Go."

He did not argue with me this time, and I was thankful. His fingers touched to my waist once, and he was gone, disappeared into the night. I wanted to look back, to see that Dimitri had him, but Mason's attention was on me again, and my magic was drained.

"Is that your plan, Bellamy?" He sounded overconfident. I had incited a riot within the former Dhampir. "I am faster. I can get to him through any of these dark shadows, or alleys."

"You think so?" I threatened him right back. "You think I'd be irresponsible enough to let Christian Ozera run off into the crowded or vacant streets of Austria at night without a Guardian or two ready to defend him?"

Stef tried to get closer, his hand on his stake, but Mason kept him back, away from me. I was the one Mason really wanted to kill. Oh, he'd take others, but only to get to me. And after me, he would find Jesse. I was not going to let that happen.

"You think I don't have Guardians placed all around this square, inside buildings, watching every bit of CCTV footage in real time?

"I don't believe you." His voice rose.

"Run." I offered. "Run in any direction. I dare you." Sure I bluffing, but unlike Christian, Mason could never fully see through my poker face. I was taking a risk as he looked around the square, attempting to decide if he should run or fight. "Christian is safe." I said, still trying to mask the uncertainty I felt about the statement until I could see Christian again. "You most of all should know that no one gets to him without going through me." I lifted an eyebrow, wondering if my challenge worked.

Half a beat later, I didn't have to wonder. Mason lunged forward, giving me no time to think. I fought him the same way I had any other Strigoi. He captured my arm in his hand, gripping tight. I was stuck briefly, but Shane was ready to move into the fight. He had Mason in a usually inescapable hold, but Mason twisted down and around, going directly for Shane. Stef and I attacked again from both sides.

"Are you alright?"

"I'm fine." I shouted. "Get him to the ground!"

The three of us were no longer in and out of this fight. We fought together as one, and eventually the two men had Mason pinned, struggling as I pulled out my stake, hoping I had made the right decision to trust that spirit in my stake was enough. I also hoped that my magic would not do more harm than good if mixed with the magic used to save Mason. Bringing my weapon down, it plunged hard and solidly into Mason's chest. Spirit rippled through the two of us first, blasting out in one earthquake of magic. Mason slowly started to return, and my stake dropped to the ground as Stef caught me seconds before I collapsed.

"Can you stand, Bells?" He asked, helping me to my feet, watching me grab my arm, wincing in pain as soon as I was upright. "I knew you were hurt. What happened?"

"He had hold of my arm, but when he turned on Shane, he…"

"Come here. Let's get you looked at." Stef insisted.

"No." I denied. "Not yet." I spotted Eddie on his way over. He ran to me, pulling me close.

"Do you know how horrible it is to watch you fighting, getting thrown, punched, and hurt? Inspiring but horrible."

Eddie and I twisted around to where Mason was curled up in a ball on the ground still, Dimitri, Shane, and Alberta now all kneeling or sitting with him. My eyes searched the area, spotting Christian only a short distance away, sitting by the large stone fountain. He was safe. He'd found Dimitri, or Dimitri had found him, and he was alive. Eddie was intensely focused on the scene with Mason, as his returned friend was starting to sit up. Dimitri was talking to him, reassuring him quietly the same way he had done with Sonya Karp.

"Stef, see to Christian." I commanded him before Eddie had hold of my good hand, taking slow steps forward.

Mason looked over to us, his eyes now back to their normal color, full of regret, guilt, and possibly the same sadness I'd felt when he was gone. Eddie stopped, frozen in place, squeezing my hand a little tighter as the two men were visually reunited.

"Bells," Eddie's voice was so low I almost couldn't hear him, "I found that disconnection you wanted." He told me. "I have to get out of here. I can't… I can't do this right now."

"Okay." I was not going to argue with him. "We can go." I turned with him, taking him away from the scene, both of us walking away from Mason. "Stef," I walked to him with Eddie held to me, "we're walking away. I won't be forced to deal with this yet, and I won't force Eddie to face it either. We are walking to the monastery…" Out of nowhere, my head felt light, and a pair of hands picked me up before I could register what had just happened.

"Bellamy." Voices called to me.

"I'm fine." I determined again.

"You most certainly are not fine. The magic we used weakened her too." Christian also reacted when I nearly fell. "With all of the stress she has been under, the magic was too much. Her emotions, my emotions, it's all tied to the magic, and her emotions are…"

"Twenty thousand levels of chaos." Eddie confirmed. "Come on. We're taking the car back." He stated, carting me off towards the SUV's as Stef tossed the keys his way.

"Bellamy." Dimitri called over to me.

"I'm good, Dimitri." I assured him too. "We'll talk when you get back to the monastery. He gave a nod, and Eddie and I were off, on our way back to the safety of our temporary home base.

"I have to call Yuri and Jesse."

"That can wait until you're rested." Eddie refused my request, keeping his eyes on the road.

"It really can't." I sat forward, fumbling through a bag I had stashed my phone in. I dialed a number that gave me no difficulty, smiling as soon as I heard the voice on the other end.

"It's finally done. We found him and it's finished." I told Yuri, and he breathed in deep, unsure if by 'done' I meant that Mason was Mason, or Mason was truly gone this time.

"Are you alright?" His concern was expected, and it made me smile again.

"Weak and sore. The fight was much quicker and rougher than I expected. I'll give you a full rundown when I've had a few hours of sleep." I kept my injury silent, fearing he'd have Eddie take me straight to hospital if mentioned.

"Get some sleep." Yuri advised. "The fight may be over, but the battle is just beginning." He said. "The Guardian Council has started arriving at Court. The worst may be yet to come."

I sighed, giving Eddie the news, causing more strife within each of us.

"I will tell Jesse, Sophie, and Aaron that you'll be back soon."

"Tell Jesse I will call him from the plane."

-A FEW DAYS LATER-

DIMITRI

"No!" I heard Bellamy shouting through the doors and walls. I was on my feet, along with Eddie, both of us rushing into the room next door, not bothering to knock.

Bellamy was standing in the middle of the small cell she shared with Christian, cell phone in hand as she listened to what was said from the opposite end. She did not turn, but Christian, trying to comfort and calm his friend, spun at the sound of the Guardian entry.

"She is talking to the Guardian Council again." Christian informed. "A woman named Alicia, and a man. I didn't catch his name. They demanded to hear about the fight with Mason."

Bellamy threw her phone onto one of the beds, and I had to guess that her conversation with the Council had only finished on her end. We all three watched as our friend sank to her knees, hitting the floor. I was sure she would lie down and curl into a ball if not for Eddie's quicker movement, kneeling down with her.

Her voice was little more than a whisper as she relayed the general subject of her conversation with Alicia Jordan. "The Council has made the not so subtle demand that I go and have a conversation with Mason Ashford."

"They can't do that!" Eddie angrily maintained, pulling her close, protecting her the way he often did. "Is it not bad enough that they sent you out to retrieve or kill him?" The two friends were very much in the same boat, emotionally speaking when it came to facing their former friend. This was difficult on both of them. They had questions of their own, they needed answers, but as angry as they were, neither was ready to hear the answers yet.

"It appears that they can do it." Tears fell, hitting her bare legs before she could hide them. "And this decision is not to be argued or refused." She looked up, her eyes meeting mine.

I looked to Eddie, he looked to me, neither of us sure we could say anything sympathetic enough to help. Eddie kept hold of her, letting her cry through her frustration, her returning anger, and confliction. I jumped, not expecting Bellamy to get to her feet so quickly after her short outburst. She was not yet finished venting.

"I was willing to go through with this 'subdue and detain' plan; I was willing to temporarily leave Jesse, Sophie, and Yuri on the Council's orders, but they're asking too much of me now."

"Do not approach Mason this minute." I implored her, unable to anticipate her reaction. "You are angry."

"I am not angry."

"Wait until we are back at Court."

"Neutral territory." Christian was trying to help.

Bellamy shot the two of us a look of disdain, indicating that it was time for us to leave. Christian chose to stay, switching places with Eddie inside of the room. I wasn't sure how much good Christian's presence would do, but if Bellamy didn't argue, neither would I. Instead I hoped that I could calm the impending war that would come once we arrived back at Court. I needed to speak with Mason myself.

I waited until he woke on his own. Having close personal experience with the changes that come with each transformation, I could not help but have a small percentage of compassion for Mason's position. Once he woke, I asked him to meet me quietly. I knew where Bellamy stood with her opinion of him, but I felt it best to get a better idea of Mason's current opinion of Bellamy. I found a place for us to sit, a place that held fewer distractions. It was still a bizarre thing to see the eyes that were once flooded with red, returned to their normal color after Strigoi were returned to their former selves. It was even stranger and more confusing to see the changes in this Dhampir I had once trained. A table sat between us. I was going to get a confession. There had to be more to this story. Mason looked skeptical and suspicious as I slid pens and paper across the table.

"I was hoping we could talk while you write."

"Write what?"

I shrugged. "Whatever you'd like. I will make sure it gets where it should."

He was definitely suspicious of my empathetic gesture, sitting back in his own chair, pushing the materials away.

"Why are you being so nice to me?"

"Because I have been in your position." I had his attention now. "I have gone through every part of what you are going through now. I have been transformed, and I have been returned."

"And you are back to the Guardian God you once were?" He sounded far too facetious for my liking. This would be harder than I thought.

"The difference between us is that I was unwillingly transformed.

"That is the only difference?" Mason sarcastically questioned.

"Bellamy thinks that you made a choice to become Strigoi those years ago when you were still novices. But," His eyebrows arched as I made I clear that I was sure there was another answer, "I have the feeling that you were influenced. Which of us is right?"

Mason still said nothing, refusing to answer the question yet.

"We cannot both be wrong either." I was careful not to push him too far. Rage would still be at the forefront of his emotions.

"She told me all about them. She told me about Bellamy and Christian."

I did not respond to his statement, mostly because I did not know what to say. Bellamy and Christian had become as close as two people could without being in a relationship, and I had seen the good and bad moments between them. Still, it was not my place to say what I felt or saw. Instead, I analyzed his reactions, taking note of each movement he made as he spoke about Bellamy.

"It has been so long since I've seen her, and the other night when I …when I returned to me, I almost didn't recognize her when I saw her. The look in her eyes was intense. It was something I have never seen in her. Maybe it was hatred. Pure hatred." Mason reflected on the first time he and Bellamy saw each other after their fight, and after she brought him back from the dead.

Again, I did not say anything about that moment between the two. I sighed and he looked back at me, disappointed. I was hoping he would answer my questions without debate, rather than having to face Bellamy. In her current frame of mind, she would not approach him with as much caution. In fact, I made a mental note to check her for weapons when near Mason.

"If I remember the date correctly," He was now starting to have a real conversation, "it was late December after Bellamy and I ended our relationship, and Rose was on the verge of further breaking my heart again. I was doing everything I could to keep it all together. I was avoiding the subject with Rose, but there was no avoiding the falling out we had.

"That should not have been your reason to run off and…"

"I know. Those girls were not the only reason for my decision." Mason quieted again, but I could tell he was trying to find the best way of explaining his choices, so I listened. "I was already in a bad place emotionally when there was a knock on my door at the lodge we students were kept at. Imagine my surprise to see Natasha Ozera standing in front of me, asking to talk. A short time into our conversation, she let it slip about Christian and Bellamy. She detailed the true nature and the depth of their relationship."

"Tasha should not have done that." I continued to curse the woman who had damaged so many lives while she was still alive. Even in death, she continued to cause trouble. "I also should not be so surprised by her true duplicity. Bellamy has paid a large price for many years because of Tasha's hidden machinations."

"Natasha convinced me that Bellamy used me, and that she was…" His voice trailed off, giving me the opportunity to defend Bellamy too.

"She loved you Mason. Those of us who were still with her, saw what your death did to her. She was not the same after you died. She is still so changed."

Mason scoffed then. "You are still protecting her." His tone had turned accusatory in seconds. "She was lying to me. She was seeing Christian Ozera too." Mason leaned forward, placing his elbows to the table. "He knew about me and Bellamy, so he is equally as guilty as she is."

My eyes travelled briefly to the side of the room. Bellamy, Christian, and Eddie were now on their way outside, all quietly laughing together. I wondered what it would do for Mason to see the three getting along so well. It would save for a later day. Now was not the time to reveal that change. I had to keep questioning and listening.

"When you say that you and Bellamy ended your relationship, what you meant to say was that you ended things between the two of you long before you heard anything about her and Christian." I had to protect my half-sister, letting Mason know that I knew more than he assumed.

"I guess Bellamy would've told you about that too." Mason's disdain had since disappeared, but he was still fairly defiant about the truth. "You two were close back then. I assume you still are f…"

"Mason, do not assume anything about me and Bellamy. We are still close. She is my…" Mason had missed so much over the last several years. "She is my sister. My half-sister. And I have been Christian's Guardian since he graduated from the Academy."

"You'd think that might surprise me more. Hell, for that matter you'd think that you and Rose ending up together would surprise me too."

"You know about me and Rose?"

Mason met my eyes, glaring back with what I thought was jealousy. "I know more than you think I do. I was told about you two. I was also told that she went after you."

We were silent for some time, Mason picking up the pen I'd offered him, tapping it to the table between us over and over again, the rhythm quick, sounding more like a hammer pounding to the ground.

"Bellamy disappeared for a few hours last night. When I stepped outside, I heard her on her phone. She was talking to…"

"Jesse." I mentioned, reluctant to start with the subject of Bellamy first. "She has called him each night since your capture to reassure him of her safety."

"They must be close at this point. I mean there's really only one reason she would choose to be his Guardian."

"There is much you don't know about Jesse and Bellamy. They have had their ups and downs, but Bellamy has always put Jesse first. All of her sacrifices have been to benefit her Moroi, rather than herself. And for a long time, they had only each other to rely on. Bellamy has said that these days, Jesse is the person who knows her best." I reflected on previous conversations, musing about the Guardian relationship Bellamy held with Jesse Zeklos.


	6. HOME

**PART 6: HOME**

BELLAMY

Most of our small group was catching up on sleep as the plane took off, and continued over an entire continent. I'd intentionally stayed awake longer, keeping watch, and pacing the aisles. As I reached the back of the plane, I saw I was not alone. Eddie was still keeping his distance from Mason, and it wasn't until his head lifted that I saw it. I saw a look in his bright eyes that I had not seen in years. It was fear. It wasn't the fear of facing Strigoi, but fear of facing the dead, which in many cases could be considered the same thing. This was different. This was going to be difficult on all of us, and it would only get worse when we touched down on Court grounds.

It didn't take long as long as I had hoped to arrive back at Court. It also hadn't taken long for rumors and gossip to spread across the whole of the Moroi Court.

"Bells, we have a problem getting back into Court." Shane mentioned casually after we pulled the cars into the parking structure. "It somehow got out that you and other Guardians, including Belikov and Castile have been absent because of a mission to either kill Mason or bring him back to face the Guardian Council. Large crowds are gathered at the North gates, hoping to get a glimpse of your decision."

"I don't know what to do." I hesitated, never having been in this sort of situation.

"Bells, this is your show until we are back through the gates." Dimitri stated from the driver's seat, each Guardian clearly in agreement. "We follow your orders."

Exhaustion was finally setting in, making it increasingly difficult to think on my feet. Our mission had been deemed highly classified and had stayed that way on our end. This was not a problem I had thought to consider, and as our SUV's reached the parking garage, I had no time left to think.

"I'm going to need some guidance here, Thor. I'm not exactly up to date on Court protocol when it comes to escorting Dhampir who have been terrorizing the villagers as Strigoi."

I could see the left side of his mouth twist upward slightly, barely hiding a smile. I wasn't sure if he was tickled by the joke that wasn't so much of a joke, or if he found the idea of my needing help comical.

"Bells," Dimitri quietly voiced, exiting the vehicle's driver's side, "you've got this under control."

"I really don't." I jumped down from the passenger side, my hand reached out to no one in particular, grasped by the person whose hand I needed to hold most in this moment. I could feel the tranquility I wanted wash over me, back in our small bubble, tapping into our connection.

"First things first." I held onto the shred of control I still had. "I don't want you near these crowds." I informed my friend, my priority in this moment, to keep him safe and unseen.

"Bells, if this is a Strigoi thing; If anyone thinks that I…"

"It's not that." I confirmed. "The Moroi at Court cannot know that you were in Vienna with us. If anyone discovers that Guardians purposely took a Moroi, a royal on mission, hell will further break loose in every direction."

"Good point."

"Dimitri, Stef, and I will take Mason through the North gate. Shane and Eddie will move Christian through the West gates while Alberta does a little damage and crowd control with Court Guardians."

Once we were all separated again, and Shane called with news that Christian was safe inside, the rest of us made our way back into Court. We made it through the first set of gates quietly, but the second area we came to was where our trouble ensued. People were talking and rumors were indeed flying. Rumors had no doubt started flying.

"I should've anticipated that our absence would be more noticed."

"So, your plan is to parade me through Moroi Court for all to see."

Mason was incredibly indignant about my plan. I paused at the doors leading to our check-in, turning swiftly on my heels. "Perhaps you should've considered the current spectacle before you made the choice you did." This was the first time I'd said anything to him since… well really since he'd ended our relationship.

"Don't you think you're being a tad harsh Bells?" Dimitri questioned, that soothing tone doing its job, but I shot him my best look of disinterest, leading the way inside.

There were a mix of comments and questions coming in each time the door to the check in station opened and closed, and it was making me nervous. The courtyard outside was full of pockets of Moroi and Dhampir, all in debate over Dhampir and Moroi being saved. It wasn't a new argument. It all continued to stem from the same ridiculous dispute over magic. Why were Guardians allowed to use magic (within stakes) in a battle, but Moroi were still banned from these dangerous situations? It was a silly argument that I continued to ignore, along with Dimitri and other Guardians. We paid little attention to the opinions around Court, but from outside, one voice caught my attention, standing out.

"Sophie?" I turned around, searching out the large window behind me, glancing at every face in the crowd until I spotted my friend trying to politely push through others in order to get to the building's door.

I smiled, looking to make sure guards had hold of our captured Dhampir before I stepped outside to hug my friend.

"You're really okay." Her voice was a little shaky.

"I'm really okay Soph." I continued to hug her, remembering how worried she had been before I'd left. "I told you everything would be fine. How've you been?"

Sophie let me go, looking around at the others in the room, her eyes stopping to directly examine Mason, who stood studying Sophia Zeklos equally as much.

"That's the guy?"

I found it impossible to hide my reaction to Sophie's inquiry and size up of Mason. And, it was admittedly the first time I had laughed out loud since the capture.

"That's him." I confirmed.

"Funny." Her eyes continued to dissect him. "I thought he'd be taller."

Again, I could not suppress my emotional eruption. I laughed until I hurt, hugging Sophia again, happy knowing that she was safe.

"The Queen will want to see him." Guards stated, and I was focused once again, pulling Sophie behind me.

"Hey Bells," Stefan stopped me from needing to be further involved, "why don't you and Belikov go find your Moroi." He offered. "We can handle this part on our own."

Under normal circumstances Dimitri and I would've objected more, but he had missed Rose like I'd missed Yuri, and this was the longest I had gone without seeing Jesse. I was not given a chance to argue before Sophie began pulling on my jacket, moving me closer to the door.

"Thanks Stef."

He winked. "You owe me a drink later."

Once the Queen was informed of our actual return to Court grounds, a meeting was arranged for later. Lissa wanted a rundown of her own. Everyone separated again, filing out of the room. I watched quietly while Mason was taken through a more discreet exit from the building, finally exiting the building myself, holding onto Sophie as she finished a conversation with Jesse over the phone, telling him that she in fact had hold of me. No doubt he and Yuri were on their way to greet us. That made me happy.

We were all home now, back to the safety of our friends and families. We had returned to Court victorious, a battle won, and still I was being asked to stand in for the Guardian Council. I was being asked to go against many of the codes and principles I held faithfully to for so long. After all I had gone through, facing the fact that Mason was not dead, and not just facing him, but after fighting him while he was Strigoi, and returning him to his former self, the Council was still "asking" me to have a face to face chat with my once long dead ex-boyfriend.

I wasn't sure where Mason's fate at Court stood, but it had not helped either Court when I'd voiced my personal opinions on Mason's return at the most recent Guardian briefings. I had nothing nice to say. There were long debates about the mission, all opinions split pretty evenly through the room. Ultimately, I knew that the decision would come down to both Councils, each scheduled to conduct their own warranted inquisitions over the next several days.

I however was up first. After returning to Court, Mason had not been placed in the Court prison cells only because Lissa did not find it a fair decision. The Queen had final say over these matters, and she had sympathy for the man in question. Instead, he was being kept inside of an empty often unused visitor's apartment. While not technically a prisoner, Mason was still under constant watch by armed guards.

As I approached the apartment from the small outer courtyard, the pair of Guardians at the door tensed, their hands twitching, moving slowly to rest on their weapons. I might've laughed out loud if I weren't equally as tense. But come on-Am I really so intimidating to two full size Guardians?

"Stand down." I ordered, but both men stayed in position.

"I'm sorry Guardian Pearce, but we have strict orders not to let anyone inside."

I rolled my eyes. At least they knew my name. They were still young Guardians, just graduated and transferred to Court from one of the Academies, but I was in no mood to play this game of supremacy.

"One: that is a stupid thing to say to me." I used my Guardian tone; the one that usually put Jesse and most Guardians in their places. "Two: that order does not apply to me. Not only do I outrank pretty much every Guardian at this Court, I am here on the orders of the Guardian Council, and I'm sure they would agree that their requests supersede any rules at Moroi Court." I gave a charming smile to each man. "Stand down and step aside before I get angry and pull rank."

Immediately the two men stepped aside, opening the door, and allowing me and the two Guardians at my back into the small space. I stepped inside to find that it was dark. The blackout shades were drawn closed, and the lights were off. It was the middle of the day and Mason was sprawled out on a couch. As I stood waiting for him to stop aimlessly flipping through television channels, a throat behind me cleared. Mason jumped up, startled by our presence.

I stepped in further, keeping my distance, turning on a side lamp, and opening the window shades.

"Bellamy." Yes, he was one-hundred percent stunned by my appearance in the apartment. He stood, sitting again as I pointed back to the couch he had been occupying.

I sat a good distance from him, wary to be much closer to him, let alone have a friendly chat.

"Do you need the pack of Guardians here while we talk?" Mason motioned to Stef and Hans as they joined me. "I don't need Guardians at the door and Guardians on top of me. I'm not going to attack you, Bellamy."

I sighed, keeping my composure. His voice was just as I had remembered. It was now soft and full of every emotion we had once shared. This would be harder than I thought.

"They aren't here to protect me from you." I explained. "Hans and Stef are here for your protection. They are here to keep me in line." I glanced over to Stef and he coughed, winking to me in encouragement. "I am not exactly a willing participant in this question and answer session."

"Guardian Pearce threatened to conduct this interrogation with her gun in hand." Hans was required to inform Mason. "And while many Guardians and Moroi feel she might be justified in that action, others have had the better judgement to keep you uninjured."

Stef and Hans both kept their opinions quiet, but looked to one another.

"Thank you for your good judgement." Mason responded to Stef, but Stef couldn't help but smile wickedly.

"Oh, I am not one of the Guardians who wants to keep Bellamy in check." Stef sat beside me, taking my hand as it started to shake. "Bells, let's get this over with so that we can go play."

"You are happy with Jesse Zeklos." Mason mused out loud before I could begin my line of questioning. "Considering the History between you two, I find that hard to believe."

"I don't care what you believe." I shot at him, but Mason stayed unruffled.

"And you are happy with Christian I have seen."

I stood defensively. "Do not bring Christian into this conversation. What you did has nothing to do with Christian." He was calmly trying to antagonize me, and it was starting to work this time.

"I know all about you and Christian."

And now I smiled. He was going to push this subject again. We were going to take a trip down memory lane. I took a deep breath in. Dimitri had managed to get a few answers from Mason before leaving Vienna, attempting to soften the blow for me. In doing so, Dimitri was told more about Tasha Ozera and her duplicitous and dangerous nature.

"You think you know about me and Christian." I replied finally. "You don't know a thing about me and him."

"I know everything. I know that you two…"

"You know what Natasha thought she knew. You know what she chose to say. Natasha was very good at choosing her words, what to say, and what to manipulate to her advantage. She was good at bending truths and being selective about those same truths." My defenses were up as I talked about Tasha, and Mason's attempt to demean Christian brought out my more hostile side.

"I know that the two of you were seeing each other behind my back at St. Vladimir's." Mason stood, truly facing me for the first time since we'd seen each other.

"I won't deny that we saw quite a bit of each other back then."

"There was more than tutoring going on between you and him."

"Far more than tutoring." I was looking to hurt him, but Mason was always better at keeping any anger he felt tempered. He could rarely see through my poker face, but I could rarely break through his.

"So, Tasha wasn't lying."

"Again," I moved away, "that woman was so good at deception at its finest, and bending facts to suit her own nefarious purposes. That doesn't mean she knew anything about what was done, said, or felt between me and Chris." I thought back to that short time in my life, seeing far more clear with time and clarity in these past years. "But, I am not here to talk about me and Christian. I'm not even here to talk about you and me."

"Why are you here?" The derision, the petulance, and of course the indifference could be heard in his tone again. "You chose not to say a word to me in Vienna. Why now?"

"As I said, I'm not a willing participant in this situation. The Council wants me to question you before you face them. Perhaps they think I can find answers that they can't. They seem to think that you might talk to me."

"What do you think?" I couldn't tell if he was baiting me again as he sat down on his couch.

"What do I think?" I said the words in a laugh, glancing at him again. "I think that you are a coward. I think that if you were a real Guardian, you never would've considered doing what you did.

"I was weak." Mason claimed, looking to excuse his decision.

"Giving up is never an option. Giving up or giving in is worse than being defeated." I provided my opinion. "It means you could've done more, but chose not to."

"Can I talk to Belikov?" Mason was obviously not happy with my outlook. "At least when he lectures, he is kinder."

"Dimitri is busy."

"He told me that you are his half-sister." Clearly Dimitri had been far more willing to talk. "When did you get that information?"

I closed my eyes, grinding my teeth, gathering courage to stay on point. "I'm not here to discuss me and Dimitri either."

"Bellamy-" He was pleading.

I swallowed hard. "I am aware that Guardians have already informed you of your rights and restrictions while you are under this Court's protection."

"Protection?" He scoffed.

I ignored his condescending reaction. "The Guardian Court has ordered a hearing within the week. Before that, they want as many answers as possible, so I suggest you cooperate. This is not a game." My tone was firm. It was the same tone I used long ago with Jesse while we were still in school. "You are restricted to this apartment, unless joined by a minimum of three Guardians. If you insist of leaving this safe space, you are to have no contact with Eddie Castile or others until it is decided that they are ready to face you."

"I take it Eddie won't be popping by to defend his absence during the fight in Vienna then?"

"Eddie has made it crystal clear that he is not ready to see you yet. If you fail to follow this rule or others, I will toss you into a prison cell myself." The rest of the meeting went on with no less condescension from Mason, and no less harshness from me, but I got through it, asking questions, receiving half answers, and ready to run as soon as I finished.

I couldn't get out of Mason's temporary housing soon enough, and as quick as Stef opened the door, I was finished, breathing heavily as the cold air swept over my skin. I sat down in the middle of the courtyard, willing myself not to hyperventilate, concentrating every bit of energy to my breathing. It worked temporarily, long enough to stand, tell Stef I'd meet him later with Yuri, and make it the golf cart, driving home to find peace.

When I pulled into the Zeklos compound, the gates closing behind me, I realized I was still concentrated on my breathing. There was a Court SUV parked at the front, and I could only guess who might be waiting. I stayed outside, parked beside the SUV, turning my thoughts to a mental review of the mission. Along with Mason being questioned by the Council, they would also interrogate me in detail about every step taken during my time in Vienna.

"I thought I saw lights pull up." Dimitri's voice startled me from my concentration. He sat in the passenger seat, putting a hand to mine, easing the storm as best he could. "You did good Bellamy. I want to commend your ability to command. The mission to Vienna was a success, and that is thanks to your leadership. You should be proud."

"I am." I let him know. "I am pleased, I am proud, and I am appalled with myself."

"Bellamy." His tone went from proud to concerned in a matter of seconds. Yup, my opinion had sent a shockwave through him. He had not expected my statement.

"Don't misunderstand me." I said before he could begin lecturing me. "I am pleased that we succeeded, I am pleased that we were able to do the job that we are born and trained to do, and most of all I am grateful that no lives were lost."

"Those are all reasons to be proud Bellamy."

"Yes they are."

"And still, you said that you are appalled."

I nodded. "I am appalled by the methods taken in order to win the battle. I am appalled at the decisions I have made. Most of all, I'm appalled by the choice Mason made, forcing me to make the decision to save him or kill him. I have done things I know are morally wrong, but I made those choices anyway.'

"Why?"

"Only way to win." I shrugged. "Only way we were going to survive. I don't like everything we did, but I wouldn't change anything about Vienna."

"That's good to know." Dimitri hugged me.

"Why are you here?" I knew I finally had to ask him, hugging him in return. "I figure you and Rose might be locked away for the next several days."

My brother gave one of those 'we need to talk' groans, and I knew I was in for another Court treat.

"When will you talk to Mason next?"

"I have a three day reprieve before trying again. Why?"

Another groan. "Rose and I were talking, and she wants to see him. She wants to see Mason. I thought I could get an idea of your position before she asks your permission."

"Why would Rose ask for my permission?" I knew what he was going to say.

As soon as we'd reached Court, returned with Mason, I was handed the long list of people, Moroi and Dhampir, wanting to see the returned man. Some were old friends wanting to see if the rumors were true. Others simply wanted to get a look at him in order to brag to their friends at Court. There was also a steady well organized schedule of Guardians shifting in and out of the residence, questioning and checking in on Mason. I would be happy when the full Guardian Council arrived, relieving me of this responsibility.

"According to the Queen, you are still in charge of this matter until the Guardian Council states otherwise."

I knew better than to further argue that point with anyone. I also knew by his more stoic tone, there was more he was not saying.

"Normally these cases are handled by the Moroi Court, or strictly by the Queen, but this is a special case."

"What do you think?" I asked his opinion on the matter. "How do you feel about Rose wanting to see Mason again so soon?"

"I do not like the idea." He was as straight-forward as he could be. "I do not think that she is ready. I also do not think that Mason is ready. Rose thinks that I am too cautious."

"You are." I agreed, considering the request, unsure of where I stood myself. "But, I also think that Rose can be too impulsive. Nearly as impulsive as me. Can I give this some thought before making a decision?" I offered to him, and he seemed pleased that I hadn't automatically said yes. "I think I can find some middle ground to this request."

Dimitri agreed as we each exited the cart, separating again.


	7. THE LIES WE TELL OURSELVES

**PART 7:**

 **THE LIES WE TELL OURSELVES**

"This is harder than I expected it to be." She voiced quieter than ever, her hands in her pockets, nervously trying to steady herself.

When Dimitri had approached me about Rose seeing Mason, my first initial thought was to agree with his more vigilant approach. I soon realized after speaking to Rose, that I was not being fair. I was not considering the extent of what she might need under these circumstances as well. In this case, the reunion could not be my decision. Mason Ashford and Rose Hathaway had known each other since Kindergarten. They were friends once too. If she wanted answers of her own, I wasn't going to stop her. Explaining that to Dimitri in a calm manner was not as easy. I wouldn't stand in Rose's way. I also wasn't going to let her walk through the lion's den alone.

This was the third time I was scheduled to chat with Mason, still getting useless non-compliant responses when I asked anything. I had to hope that Rose being present might do some good for us all. I was first to approach the door, allowing Rose to gather up any courage she needed.

"Welcome back Guardian Pearce." I heard Mason's voice say as I entered into our usual meeting space. "I see you are alone today. Does that mean you are no longer a threat to me? Are you unarmed today?"

He was being as patronizing and difficult already, giving me less hope that he might behave better for Rose.

"I've brought a friend with me today, and I am warning you not to cause trouble. This will be challenging enough without your snide comments."

"Has Eddie finally decided to come and face me?"

"Eddie has made it clear still that he is not ready. Someone else offered to join me."

As we stood, speaking, and tossing back the invisible ball of arrogance and superiority, Rose knocked.

"Guardian Hathaway is not on the list of visitors today." One of the other guards complained, and I smiled, leaning back only slightly to speak with him.

"Who is in charge here? Is it me or you? If I am willing to allow Guardian Hathaway access, you will not stop her."

Rose was chuckling as she entered through the small foyer. "One of these days you have got to tell me how you do that." She was speaking as easily as usual. "Every Guardian here at Court both loves and fears you." I caught her smiling until she rounded the corner, coming face to face with our new reality.

"Mase." She said his name, her entire body looking like it might shake apart, fragmenting into millions of tiny pieces. "It's really true."

I knew this feeling all too well. I'd had the same reaction countless times in the last few weeks since seeing Mason in Vienna. Mason's reaction to Rose was more predictable, as if no time had gone by; as though he had not committed a serious crime.

"Rose." He sounded light, kept back in place as she practically bolted backwards, her back hitting a near wall.

I stepped in between them, my fingers twitching over my weapons. "You sit over there." I ordered Mason, pointing to the couch used when Guardians would question him, and making sure he sat facing away from Rose until she was better prepared.

"Where did we leave off the other day?"

"We left off with you refusing to answer my questions." Mason was being indignant.

"I'm not required to answer your questions."

"Bellamy, I have answered every question you have ordered me to answer. I deserve answers of my own."

"Deserve?" I tried to keep my cool, but his unbothered approach was still infuriating. "What exactly do you want to know?"

He paused for much longer than I appreciated, only speaking when Rose started to slowly move around him, her hand close to her weapon too. I did not blame her for that one.

"What happened after you left St. Vladimir's? Where did you go?"

"You know where I went." This was not news to him. "I was called to Guardian Court." I kept my tone as tolerant as possible. "I was at Court for several weeks while the Council proceeded to map out the rest of my life. They gave me a choice after long deliberations."

"You had the option to return to St. Vladimir's." He had guessed that, and I was not going to lie to him.

"I was given the option to return to the Academy, to train with the Guardians I'd already been training with. Or, I could train with Bridgette. I don't care about what you thought of my choice. It was the right one. I was able to train in the field with some of the most elite Guardians in our ranks."

"Huh." Mason leaned back, crossing his arms. "All of that elite training, and you chose to guard Jesse Zeklos."

I could feel Rose smirking as Mason attempted to degrade my choice.

"Jesse was never forced upon me. I made the choice to guard him."

"Shocked the hell out of everyone too." Rose added her opinion.

"My choice shocked a lot of people." I agreed. "Bridgette and Dimitri most of all, but Jesse needed someone who would see that there was a better person within him. I also needed Jesse."

"Damn." Mason shook his head back and forth. "I think the spirit in your stake did something to my hearing. It sounded like you said you needed Jesse."

"Jesse made me want to be a Guardian again." I defended. "After you died, I didn't see the point of being a Guardian. I lost my faith in our purpose. That's what you never understood about me and Christian. We as Guardians, we need the Moroi. They are our purpose. We are drawn to them. We are born wanting to protect them. We are trained to protect them, and we will willingly lay down our lives to do that." I was lecturing, but I didn't care. "You don't get to judge my choice about Jesse. You don't have that privilege."

"I never had that privilege."

"Here we go again." I complained. "Back to the past."

"The past is all I know."

"Whose fault is that?" Rose commented half under her breath, and it irritated Mason that she too was more hostile to him than usual.

"I don't get to judge your choice, but you all get to judge mine?"

"Absolutely." I replied. "For the rest of my days, I get to judge your choice. The difference between us is I did not choose to die and come back as the one evil thing we train to kill."

"Fair enough." He poured a glass of water, setting it down before he went on questioning my life and choices. "Am I allowed to talk about Eddie? He was in Vienna. Why didn't he fight?"

"That was my call. I wouldn't allow it. That's all you need to know."

"Bet he enjoyed that decision. He was always a good fighter."

"He still is." I supported my friend in his absence. "He eventually understood my reasons, and agreed." I left out the loud tense arguments we'd had beforehand, knowing it was best not to fuel any arguments Mason had with Eddie.

"He still won't come by to see me."

"He is traumatized. We are all traumatized." I further explained. "If you'd look past your own selfishness, you might see that your return is not just hard on you."

"I have one more question." He changed subjects immediately, clearly not wanting to feel any of the guilt he should feel.

"Make it a good one."

"Dimitri mentioned something about the Guardian Council gathering here to decide my fate." Mason said. "He said that there are Guardians who can stand in Court; Guardians who can request leniency."

"Why would Dimitri tell you that?"

"Because I asked, and because he appears to be one of the few who cares enough to inform me of these things. Is what he says true?"

"I can't answer that."

"Is it classified?"

"No." I said. "I don't know. Dimitri really should not tell you these things."

"Why not?" He was starting to argue with me all over again.

"It gives you hope. Do you really think you deserve clemency from the Guardian Council?

"Dimitri also mentioned that death is a possible option as punishment. Do you think they will make that choice?"

"Why are you asking me?" I'd since become more cavalier when discussing the Guardian Council and their edicts.

"I'm asking you because you are clearly working with them now."

Rose and I both laughed out loud then. "I don't work with either Council. I work for them, as all other Guardians do. They give a command and we follow it. I'm here because after enough arguing and shouting, I have no choice."

"Would you let them kill me?" The tone of his song was changing at the idea of a permanent death. "Look, I know what I did was wrong."

"Do you?"

"Hindsight Bellamy. Please answer the question."

"You aren't the first to ask that question. Over the last several weeks I've had Guardians, Moroi, and even a Queen ask me that question. In Vienna, it was: 'What would I do? What should I do? Would I kill you or would I let you live?" I took a deep breath, continuing. "The truth is, even I didn't know what I was going to do in Vienna until that moment. As we all do in life, I made a choice. The Council will make their choice and we must all live with those choices."

"You made a choice." Mason repeated. "You brought me back to life, and brought me here to Court. You did all of this so that I could feel as tortured as all of you."

"You don't know the meaning of tortured Mason. I am not torturing you."

"No? Being here, sitting in front of you, watching your eyes hate me, hearing your voice despise and condemn me-you don't think it's torture?"

"You put yourself in this position."

"I thought I understood why Dimitri was so angry about you threatening to pull your weapon on him." Mason and I heard Rose say to me. "I really thought I was on his side. I usually am."

"Me too." I laughed in agreement. "He is frustratingly level-headed sometimes."

"Now I have to worry about both of you pulling guns on me?"

"Who said anything about my gun?" I replied back, equally as frustrated. "I carry more weapons than any Court Guardian. My gun should be the least of your worries." I found as much of my calm as I could manage, sensing much of my animosity spreading to my Moroi. "Perhaps we should end our session here today." I stood.

Rose slowly stood, moving slowly as I ended the question game.

"Can I say something before we leave?" Rose asked, getting Mason to turn. Still she kept a good amount of space between them. "I was a wreck when you died. You staged your death. You worked with a deceitful Moroi, to make it seem like you had been killed in front of me. You needed a damned witness, and didn't care about what it would do to those left to mourn you. I didn't know it at the time. I don't even think Dimitri realized the extent of it, but Bellamy held more guilt than us all. She didn't deserve what you did." Rose defended me now. "None of us deserved it, but her most of all. Frankly," her head tilted to look back at me, "I am surprised she held herself together as well as she did back then. I'm surprised she was able to get out of bed and function at all."

"All that guilt," Mason turned from Rose, back to me, "it ate at her until she ran right back to Christian. My death ultimately lifted your guilt. Admit it."

"Do not turn this around again. Do not place blame for your choice on others. And, do not bring Chris into this battle again. You didn't become Strigoi because of Christian, or me, or even because of Rose. You did it because you are weak. You weren't strong enough to face your own insecurities and fault."

"My insecurities were not unfounded." Mason continued blaming everyone but himself. "You contributed to half of the self-doubt I was feeling back then." He was back to using that aggressive growl in his throat, this conversation once again getting us nowhere, backsliding to our complicated past.

"I can't keep doing this." I refused, opening the front door, practically shoving Rose out before me.

Mason followed as far as he could before stopped by Guardians, the three of us realizing that fortunately for both Rose and I, Dimitri Belikov is in fact overly cautious when it comes to his friends and family. I smiled as he stood from the center courtyard fountain, revealing he'd brought along one of my favorite people to mellow me out after this meeting. Rose went straight to her own protector as Jesse started towards me.

"I cannot keep going round and round with you Mason." I stated, going to Jesse before he could get anywhere near Mason, or vice-versa. "I cannot keep listening to you blame me, Rose, and Christian for what you did." My temper and volume were on the rise again. "If the Council wants answers from you, they can bloody well pry them out of you at your trial."

Jesse put an arm around me while I allowed him to step in as my own protector. He held me with both arms, expecting my break down at any moment. I wasn't going to give Mason the satisfaction of a break down. I was stronger than that. I hoped that I was stronger. Jesse and I stood silent and unmoving for minutes, before even needing to say anything.

"Guardian Belikov said that you might want a friendly face out here."

"Thank you for being here Jess."

He kept an arm around me as we started to leave.

"Are you coming back again?"

So close, I thought to myself, and Jesse chuckled as though he could read my mind. I spun slowly back to Mason as he stayed behind the Guardians outside of his door.

"Now you want me here?" My eyes rolled, but his question kept me in place. Part of me wanted to know the answer.

"After what Rose said, and after everything Belikov has had to say, I see that things really have changed."

I couldn't tell if he was lying, or saying this to get me to talk with him again, to start another row about me, him, and Christian. Nevertheless, my time for this evening was up.


	8. Part 8

**PART 8:**

 **I apologize for the lack of an update. I'm in the process of moving, and it's hard to sit and get all of this on to my computer while packing boxes. The next chapter is all about Switzerland. I'm writing it up now, so hopefully, it will be up soon too. Happy Reading! Enjoy.**

Everything I knew was changed. Every _one_ I knew had changed. I could feel the changes in me occurring, leveling out over the last several days. It had taken a few weeks, but Dimitri mentioned that because I had been Strigoi for a longer amount of time, "coming down" as he called it, was taking its time. As the resentment and animosity faded, I was seeing much more clearly. My eyes were open again. Guilt. Guilt and regret were highest on the list of things I was feeling. Each repercussion of each action or decision made was returning to me rapidly.

It was Dimitri's turn to talk with me today. I didn't mind sitting with him, because he held less judgment. He'd been in my position too. When he offered a day out of my apartment, away from Court housing, I accepted. We spent the morning still flanked by two more armed Guardians, but Dimitri suggested a place that would be quieter on Court grounds, away from the eyes and ears of Court gossip. The soccer pitch was quieter, but not altogether empty. Bellamy, Jesse Zeklos, and Yuri Tverskaya were all on the field, kicking a ball around and having fun together. It was still a strange sight to see Bellamy and Jesse laughing, enjoying time together.

"She is so different." I commented, seeking some tactful way of bringing up all of the shifting emotions in me.

"Of course she is." Dimitri said, and I blew off the unintended sarcasm I could hear in his tone.

"She is happy. She never looked as happy as she does now. When we were together…"

"You were both young." He said. "You were inexperienced at life outside of the Academy." We sat in the stands, looking down at the field. "Bellamy has grown as a person. She has grown as a Guardian."

"She's still as stubborn as always." I half-joked.

"Some things never change." Dimitri and I laughed, even gaining a chuckle from the Guardians at our backs.

"I spoke to Bellamy last week, and I don't think I'll get to talk to her again until my trial." I brought up my upcoming trial with both Councils, letting Dimitri know that I too was ready for resolution.

"Even if you two aren't meeting until your trial, she is aware of the ongoing meetings you will have."

"Good." I wasn't hiding much anymore, allowing Guardians to know where I'd been. I had not yet given detailed specifics of why I had done what I'd done, but I also had not been asked for specific details.

"The last time we spoke, she said that if I want to ask more questions about when or why she changed, I should talk to Eddie or Aaron Drozdov. What do you think?" I asked the Guardian beside me as he too watched Bellamy and her Moroi.

"In my opinion," Dimitri was fully concentrated on the soccer field, "I would say your best bet is Aaron Drozdov." He too was aware of the strict rule that I was not to approach Eddie Castile yet. "If Bellamy says that he has answers to your inquiries, I would ask him."

I saw the look in his eyes shift as he turned to face me again. Despite answering my question, he had his own. Dimitri was visibly shaken by the notion that there was something others knew about Bellamy, that he did not. Hell, I was thrown by the same thought. Considering how close Bellamy had been with Dimitri at St. Vladimir's, I wondered what a royal, one who did not run in the same circles as my Dhampir ex-girlfriend, might know about her.

"As a precaution," Dimitri went on with hesitation, "I would respectfully consult Guardian Reyes about talking to his Moroi."

"Let me ask you a question," I was hoping for an honest straightforward answer from him, "Would you let me sit down with Christian if I asked?"

"I would." Dimitri was as forthcoming as I might expect. "But I may feel different than Shane. "You two have more history than you and I."

He made a good point, and for the next forty-five minutes made many more good points. I was going to have to nicely make my request to Shane about his Moroi. We talked for as long as we could, and it was nice to have someone better understand the changes, and why I wanted to better understand those around me. I was risking a lot for a small amount of insight and knowledge.

 **BELLAMY**

" _Sometimes I forget who you really are." His words were softer, but in truth still meant to be some sort of cutting remark, taunting me into this antagonistic banter._

" _Who am I?" I was unwilling to let myself fall into the same pattern of antagonism._

" _You mean besides the niece of the most celebrated, influential, and valued Guardian to grace the ranks? It appears that you have not surprisingly taken up that very position."_

" _You don't know what you are talking about." I did not like him bringing up Bridgette, or what she meant to /guardians, especially those who knew her._

" _I always knew you'd be an extraordinary Guardian."_

 _I laughed quietly. Truly he had no real clue as to what really happened in the time between my being a novice and becoming a Guardian. "You spend a day here and there with other Guardians and you think you know who I am now?"_

" _You are changed. I'll give you that." Mason was willing to concede._

" _You're talking to the wrong people." I provided him a clue. If he wanted to know what I'd done and why, he could talk to others if they were willing to talk. "You want to know the real story, what happened after you died, maybe start talking to the right people, and ask the right questions._

" _The right people?" He was still questioning. "The way I hear it, you are the go-to Guardian when you're here at royal Court."_

 _I was shaking my head with amusement by the time he finished his assumptions, standing, preparing to leave his apartment. Our time was finished, and now that both Councils were present and accounted for on Court grounds, the trial would begin soon. My job was done._

" _Who does know? Dimitri?" Mason inquired, still on the wrong path. "Jesse?"_

" _Nope. Aaron knows." I suggested, half realizing what I was doing._

" _Drozdov?"_

" _The one and only."_

" _What about Ozera. He must know." I was getting nowhere with him still._

" _You're looking to the wrong people. Christian still doesn't know. Yuri knows. And Eddie. Eddie shouted at me for an entire day when he heard that I gave up; when I quit."_

"He wants to talk to Aaron?" Shane walked right into my kitchen. "Why would he ask to talk to Aaron? What possible reason is there?"

This was definitely my doing, and now my friend was freaking out. "I know." I said, letting Shane know that I was aware that Mason might request an audience with Aaron. "It may have been my suggestion."

"What? Why would you suggest that?"

"Mason has questions."

"So?"

"So, I thought you and Mason were buddied up again. Why is this such a problem for you?"

"He wants to speak to Aaron alone. He doesn't want any Guardian interference or influence."

One-hundred percent not the safest of ideas, but as I gave more consideration to the thought of sending Aaron to see Mason, I recalled what I had said to Mason last we spoke. I was the one who suggested Mason talk to the "right" persons if he wanted the right answers. I was putting Aaron in a precarious position, causing Shane massive anxiety, but there were only three people who had knowledge of my "in between" time Mason was not permitted to go anywhere near Eddie, and Yuri wanted to repeatedly punch him in the throat. Aaron Drozdov was literally the only person Mason could talk to about these things.

"Let him do it." I advised Shane. "Let Aaron sit down with Mason. What harm could it do?"

"What harm could it do?" I could answer my own question, but really did not need to provide my friend with more concern about his Moroi. "You're not serious Bells."

I suddenly realized that I was being used. Shane, like me knew every direction this conversation could take, and he had come to me. I was currently the least likely person to ever place anyone near Mason Ashford. Why come to me?

"You were hoping I would say no." I surmised. "You were hoping that I would say no, so that you could blame me when you refuse Mason? That is a shitty thing to do, Reyes. I'm not going to be your scapegoat. If you want to say no, do it yourself. I am however on board with sending Aaron over to see Mason."

He looked remorseful enough after my berating of him, also acknowledging the crappy position he put me in.

"Why?" He asked, leaning onto his elbows. "Why are you on board such an uncontrollable idea like this?"

"It's not uncontrollable. Even if you and I aren't there with Aaron, I wouldn't go in without a plan."

"Why?" He questioned me again, wanting my reasons.

"It's personal." I kept the details to myself, but that was not good enough. "Aaron knows a part of me and a time in my life that you and others don't."

"What time? What does that mean?" Now Shane like Mason wanted more answers.

I was not ready to provide him with those answers yet. "Ultimately, this will be Aaron's decision. He must decide to talk to Mason. Before he does, I would like to speak to him on my own. Please."

Shane had no issue with me talking to Aaron alone, but evidently, his "trust" in Mason only went so far. Big surprise. A knock on my office door, close to evening hours, interrupted any work I was catching up on.

"Bellamy." Aaron slowly opened the door, smiling as he saw me. "Shane said that you want to see me."

I stood as he entered, trying to keep the look and feel of panic from my face. "Come on in. Have a seat."

Aaron sat in one of the chairs across from my desk, leaning back comfortably.

"You want to explain why you and Shane are acting so shifty the last few hours?"

"Are we?"

"Bells, what is going on?"

Out of nowhere, I felt as though I would cry. Recalling everything Aaron and I had talked about in Switzerland was bringing back memories, and doubts. He was now well aware of why Shane and I had jetted off to Vienna. He knew many details about Mason's return to Court, and I was pretty sure Shane had filled him in on things that many at Court weren't privy to. I wondered exactly how much Aaron knew, and I might've asked if he didn't start the conversation first.

"How are you doin, Bells? We haven't seen much of each other since you came back from Austria." I knew that he and others were worried that Mason's return might break me all over again, but Aaron also knew that I was stronger than that. "Jesse mentioned that you haven't been feeling like yourself lately."

"You talked to Jesse about me?"

"He's concerned. We are concerned. Mason's return has hit you the hardest."

"Speaking of Mason," I took the opportunity to change the subject, "I know that Shane mentioned that Mason wants to talk to you."

Aaron nodded, his eyes now looking tense.

"I'd like to ask you to do the same thing." I moved from where I stood, sitting in the chair next to my friend, taking his hands with mine. I knew what I was asking him to do, bringing up that same urge to cry again. After the tragedy and trauma he had suffered at the hands of Strigoi, I couldn't expect much from him. I was positive that he still had nightmares. I was also positive that I was running the risk of triggering some post-traumatic-nstress episode in him.

"I know what I'm asking. I know that this is no small favor I'm asking you to do, but you are the only person I can ask."

Aaron pulled his hand from mine, placing it under my chin, bringing up more memories of a time gone by. "You know that I would do anything for you." He surprised me. "Can I ask…"

"He wants to know about me." I replied before he could ask. "He wants to know about the side of me that only you know."

"You're asking me to tell him about Switzerland?"

"No." I stopped him. "I'm asking you to answer his questions. Leave Switzerland out of it."

"Will you be there?"

"No." The next shoe was dropped on Aaron, and now I could sense the trepidation radiating from him. "No Guardian interference or influence. Mason said he doesn't trust you to answer honestly if Shane and I are with you. I saw his refusal coming. "I know what I am asking you to do, but just because Shane and I cannot be there, does not mean that I would send you defenseless and alone. I'm sending Jesse with you."

I thought he might laugh. "Jesse? I hope you have a good plan. Sending in someone who is looking for a reason to kill your ex doesn't sound too wise."

"Jesse won't touch Mason unless he has to, and if that moment comes, Shane and I will literally be feet away."

I wasn't sure how convinced Aaron was, even after agreeing to see Mason, but as I'd anticipated, Jesse was all to wiling to join Aaron on a visit to Mason. I didn't enjoy sending two Moroi into Mason's apartment alone, if only for the fact that they both held long standing grudges against the man, but if there was anyone I could send in this particular case, I trusted Jesse. If any dangerous or tense moments crept up, I would know immediately. Jesse promised not to mask his emotions no matter how troubling.

"Shane and I are not allowed in the apartment with either of you, so I need you to be my eyes and ears in there Jess." I explained to my Moroi all over again while we stood in the visitor's Courtyard, a few feet back from Shane and Aaron. "I need you to stay in control. Aaron is there to answer simple questions that he knows the answers to. But, Mason has had time to become a master at his own manipulation tactics."

"You can trust me, Bells. I can do this for you." He took my hand

"I know. Anything goes wrong, if things go sideways, you call. I'm right out here."

"I assume you won't allow me to hit the guy." Jesse gave a short amused hum at the thought of punching Mason, walking ahead of me as I pulled on Aaron's awrm after Shane finished his own set of restrictions.

"I want you to be careful in there. I want you to be mindful of your surroundings, and if you need to walk out of there for any reason…"

"Bells," Again he put his hand beneath my chin, bringing me slightly closer, "Bells, it'll be okay. I agreed to this. We won't be in there long and he won't know anything you don't want him to." Aaron's voice was soft and reassuring. "Don't worry."

 **AARON**

I walked through the door, into the front room, my eyes adjusting to the lighter surrounding. The room was pretty sparse. Two couches, a chair and table, a flat screen on the wall, and some electronics spread throughout. Compared to most other apartments, this place was lacking in space, décor, and amenities. Fit for the man who had willingly turned Strigoi, pushing the woman he claimed to love into the darkest pits of fear, pain, sadness, and grief. It was unbearable to think about what Mason had done. It was unthinkable and impossible to imagine what he was putting Bellamy through all over again.

As we entered the room, Jesse saw him first, a sharp breath escaping him.

"My God." I said, my eyes resting on him, feeling as if I had walked through a portal into some alternate universe. "You really are alive. You really were Strigoi." The last word felt as though it would tear my insides to shreds. I pulled myself together, knowing that Bellamy was counting on me, and I'd meant it when I promised to do anything for her.

"You asked me here to talk.' I moved in further and Mason peered around me.

"Your watchdog?"

To my surprise, Jesse kept his cool, not reacting to Mason's insult

"Are you going to get to the point of this meeting? What is it you wat to know? " I tried to do what Bellamy asked. I tried hiding my true feelings, tried keeping personal opinions to myself, and resisted the surge of anger and resentment.

"I am trying to understand Bellamy. After all of these years, she is a different person. She mentioned something cryptic that caught my attention, but when I asked her to elaborate, I was told to ask the right people."

"You and Shane are friends." I found myself mentioning the obvious. "And still, he doesn't want me here talking to you. He thinks it is a bad idea." That was the truth. He hadn't stopped telling me that he was not thrilled with me talking to Mason on my own.

"Hmph." Mason made a small noise. "And yet you are here. Why?"

"Because Bellamy approves. She asked and I'm here for her. No other reason."

"No other reason." He repeated my words with a stretch of venom, studying my words, twisting what I might say or think. Mason sat down, leaning to the side as he spoke. "She convinced you to come here alone, talk to me, and divulge her cryptic secrets, and you agreed, despite the fact that your own Guardian is against it." He analyzed the look I tried to hide, sitting across from him.

"Are you in love with her?" He reached for anything he could that might antagonize. "You wouldn't be the first Moroi who's fallen for her charms."

Jesse chuckled.

"Don't be ridiculous. She's my friend."

"That often makes unrequited love harder."

"You'd know." I spat back at him, pleasing Jesse as he stayed behind me, listening to the conversation as Bellamy had likely requested. "You talk to Rose lately?"

"Talk is a strong word." Mason said. "How long have you been in love with Bellamy?"

"That's enough." We both heard Jesse protectively growl his own command.

At that, Mason shut down any accusations, moving on with his purpose.

"She quit. She said that she quit. After I was gone, she decided not to be a Guardian."

I could feel Jesse doubting and denying what I knew to be factual.

"Why?" Mason asked me.

"Why do you think?" I couldn't help my tone, but it was a stupid question to ask. I gave a short pause, studying his reactions in return. "She was overwhelmed. She didn't want to lose anyone else. She lost who she was; lost who she is."

"Okay." The former Strigoi, former dead man seemed to understand the truth in my words. "Why do you know all of this? How did you get firsthand knowledge of these things? Bellamy said that no one knows that she quit, except you, Eddie, and Yuri Tverskaya."

"I want to know the same thing." Jesse chimed in. Had Bellamy not considered that Jesse would find out that there had been a possibility she never might've been his Guardian, or anyone else's for that matter?"

"I was there right after she quit." I hadn't told anyone, including Jesse these secrets I now revealed, and it was not easy with his eyes on me instead of Mason. "I was in a bad place mentally and emotionally. Bellamy was there to help me after my family and others were attacked." I was careful about what I mentioned, and how it was told. "We talked for days and nights. She told me what she had done, and I doubt I was alone in my shock. I told her she was crazy to quit. She is one of the best Guardians I've known. She lost faith, she lost her purpose, and ultimately she lost the person she was before you…" I did not need to finish my sentence.

I was another half hour before Jesse and I were walking back out of the apartment. I felt drained and weak after recalling so much. I must have looked the way I felt, because Shane and Bellamy had Jesse and I driven directly to one of the feeder's buildings.

 **BELLAMY**

"Is Aaron in love with you?"

"What? I sounded offended, although it wasn't the first time the question had been asked. Bridgette once posed the same question, using the same words.

Standing outside of neighboring feeding rooms, I had to respond in a much more diplomatic way after the questions Mason asked.

"Why would Aaron be in love with me?"

"I know it sounds insane." Shane held onto the suspicious tone in his voice. "But the way he looks at you sometimes, the way he talks to you, and the way he reacts, it's almost as if…"

"Please don't read too much into it. Your Moroi is not in love with me."

"He broke up with Mia.' Shane mentioned.

"Again?"

"Something about not being able to fully commit himself."

Not that I was totally surprised by this bit of news. Mia and Aaron had already split up at least five times since losing the baby Mia carried. It was a sad loss, but it made keeping them together far more difficult.

"The funny this is," Shane continued, "I've never seen him look at anyone the way he looks at you. He is often willing to drop everything if you ask."

"That doesn't mean anything more than we are friends." The truth was, if anyone other Guardian had high-jacked Shane Reyes for a dangerous mission to Vienna, Aaron would've thrown a week long tirade and tantrum for the world to see.

"Something happened between you two and I want to know what it is."

"Fine." I caved.

"I want to know about Switzerland." I wasn't expecting him to say that. My chest tightened around the request. "I know it has something to do with you two. When we land in St. Moritz, Aaron grows sullen and nostalgic. Plus, I've heard both of you mention it."

"Switzerland is just a place."

"It has something to do with your connection to my Moroi."

"Almost everything." I softly voiced. "Okay." I agreed. "You are right. You should know. A Guardian should know everything about their Moroi. If it were Jesse, I'd want to know. Let's go back to our compound. Aaron and I will explain everything."

Shane, Aaron, and I were gathered in the main receiving room of the Zeklos compound as Aaron and I prepared to tell our Guardian friend all the details of what happened in Switzerland. The pounding knock on the front door didn't concern me until I heard Dimitri's voice in the foyer.

"Where the fuck is Bellamy?"

"Bells?" Jesse faltered, slowing opening the door and poking his head in a few seconds later. "Guardian Belikov is here. He would like to know where the fuck you are. His words not mine."

My heart dropped and my stomach was doing Olympic style cartwheels all of a sudden. My half-brother burst through the doors, past Jesse, and into the room. He knew, I thought. He knew what I had done, and he was pissed. I had agreed to let Aaron explain the events of the time shortly after Mason's presumed death. I should've expected the fallout to follow. A rumor at royal Court could spread in no time. The truth, in all of its salacious glory, traveled at miraculous speed. Did Mason go straight to Dimitri after the conversation with Aaron?

"Why would you hide something so important from me? Explain to me." Dimitri insisted. "Tell me why you would do something so irresponsible."

"Dimitri." Rose was at his side. "You said you were going to stay calm."

"I am calm." He growled, staring down at me.

"I don't want to talk about this with _you_?" I used the last word in a way that said he was an exception to all others.

"With _me_?" He was stone cold, and it did no less than worry me. He couldn't understand why I would not want him to know what I had done. "After everything we endured together Bellamy, how could you make such a permanent decision? Why did you never say anything to me? Why didn't you come to me? You ignored my calls. Explain yourself."

 _.._ "Why didn't I come to you?" Yup, I knew what he was on about, and it was time to come clean. "You were the enemy, Dimitri." My sentence was as matter-of-fact as I could make it. "Mason had just died, and I had very little clarity. People can do and think the worst things when emotions overtake reason. You were there in Seattle, and at the time, I blamed you. You let him die. I blamed all Guardians. Everyone around me let Mason die."

"What did you do, Bellamy?" It was Rose questioning me this time, trying to keep Dimitri from flying off the handle.

"I quit. I didn't want to take on the responsibility of killing, watching others be killed, or being killed. I didn't want to be responsible for another life." I confessed to Rose, Dimitri, Shane, and Aaron. "After I quit, things only got weirder."

"You blamed me." Dimitri sat down slowly. He sounded saddened by what I had confessed. He had not expected it. "You still blame me?"

"No. Of course I don't. I gained the clarity I needed while I was in Switzerland."

"Switzerland again." Shane breathed out. "What is it with Switzerland? What is it that connects you, Aaron, and Switzerland?

"Mason said that Aaron is one of three people who knows the details of that time." Dimitri added. "Why does he think that?"

I closed my eyes. The time had come. "You're all going to want to sit and get comfortable."

"Bells." Aaron nervously stopped me.

"I never should've asked you to keep secrets from Shane, and I should've been brave enough to talk to Dimitri." I shifted over as Aaron traded places with his Guardian. "We're going to tell them now."


	9. Chapter 9

**PART 9: WHAT HAPPENS IN SWITZERLAND**

Listening to the messages filling up my voicemail was not without its own efforts. Every Guardian I knew was calling, leaving messages of condolences, of apology, regret, or of justification. The first message I heard made me want to throw my phone across the room. Better yet, I would smash it with a hammer.

" _ **Bellamy it's Dimitri. (Silence) Please, call me."**_

This was the fifth message he had left for me, and he was asking a lot under the circumstances. Alberta called, but I was in no mood to talk to any Guardians. Members of the Council called and knocked on the door to Bridgette's apartment where I was hiding out. They had all dropped the ball. My questions, my valid questions continued to either be avoided or completely ignored. The excuse that novices were not caught or seen because cameras around Seattle were not a priority, was a lie. After the Badica housemurders, and the Drozdov attack, Seattle should've been priority number one. I didn't like people lying to me, deciding what I should or shouldn't know. I went on refusing all calls. Then Yuri called.

I had to force myself not to pick up my phone. I didn't blame him. I simply couldn't talk to him. I couldn't listen to him yet, but I did listen to his voicemail.

" _ **Bellamy." (Silence from him too) "Bellamy," He repeated, "I'm so sorry. If there is anything I can do, anything you need, don't hesitate."**_

I closed my eyes, focusing on his accent, the accent that thickened with his emotions. I was grateful not to hear him say 'how he wished he had been there, wished he'd prevented the tragedy, or that he might've done more'. The last few seconds of the call was the sound of his breathing. It was low and unsteady. Listening to Yuri's voice did a little to lift my spirits.

After news of Seattle and Mason's death, I was banished (more or less) to Guardian Court. Bridgette and I had been training in Budapest, but when the attacks first began and news of the Badica's hit us, she was more on edge. Bridgette was on her phone with Council members more often. And then I was sent here, to Court.

I couldn't sit and hide forever, but I also didn't want to see or speak to anyone. I was alone in one of the small Guardian training depots, lifting weights when the doors opened, closing rather loudly. I assumed the noise was meant to get my attention as I turned to see Kenley Price motioning for me to stop what I was doing. I set down my weights, and picked up my water bottle.

"I chose this facility so that I could be alone."

"I know you are hurting Bellamy." Guardian Price attempted.

"I have nothing to say to the Council. I thought I made that clear by not taking your calls."

"Nothing to say, aside from the unprofessional drive by letter of resignation you dropped on us. We are in a period of transition and in the middle of a crisis. You cannot just quit." Kenley lectured me.

Perhaps my method of abandoning this path had not been wise or professional, but it made my point. I did not want to be a Guardian anymore. It was the decision I was making for my life. I would be responsible for myself and no one else. If others died, it wouldn't be my fault.

"Bridgette would like you to meet her in Switzerland." Kenley's words were more of a demand than a request. This, I considered, was a learned habit, because Bridgette was also very skilled in her very specific tones.

"Switzerland?" What is in Switzerland?" I asked.

"Her job."

"She's on a mission?" I inquired. "That's why she sent me here to Court?"

Kenley did not elaborate on her response, so the only information I would be given was: **A:** I was summoned to meet my Guardian aunt in Switzerland, **and B:** She was on a mission. The many problems with both statements crowded into my head. The main problem being…

"I'm not permitted to be on field missions with her." I pointed out the most obvious fact. "I don't have that kind of clearance." In fact, no Guardians outside of Bureau Ten were permitted to be on missions with Bridgette. She was often tasked with doing things that I didn't want to think about most days.

"Nevertheless," Kenley went on, "she has asked for you, and you are being sent immediately."

Something wasn't right, but I wasn't going to argue. "I have no other choice but to accept. But, as you and the Council demanded I be put in the position of Guardian earlier than most, please give me the courtesy of a straight answer. Why am I being pushed from Court grounds so quickly?

"There are groups from the royal Court and Guardians from St. Vladimir's Academy on their way to our Court."

There it was. The truth.

"You are not particularly fond of Guardians at this time."

"Curiously," I brought up the sensitive topic, "exactly which Academy Guardians will be here at Court?" I made my question sound less demanding.

"Does that matter?"

"It does to me. I want answers from them. I want face-to-face answers."

"That is not wise Bellamy."

"I want to stay and hear what they have to say for themselves."

"The Queen will also be in attendance."

"Oh." I stopped my petition to stay at Court. The arrival of Tatiana Ivashkov was a whole different and complicated set of circumstances.

"You are most definitely not a fan of Tatiana Ivashkov."

"That is putting it mildly." I spoke softer. "I get it Guardian Price.' I gave her a reprieve. "I will fight her opinions and those of the attending Academy Guardians, and Tatiana will not hesitate to make me suffer for voicing my opinions."

"Exactly, Guardian Pearce."

"I haven't changed my mind. I'm still not interested in being a Guardian." I repeated. "The title is not necessary."

"Of course." She chuckled. "You will be further briefed by Bridgette upon your arrival." She left me to return to Bridgette's apartment to pack my things. I had no clue how long I would be in Switzerland, or what I would be doing, so I packed for all occasions.

Descending the jet stairs felt surreal. Being in a completely different country made me feel far more separated from the life I once clung to. There was a tinted SUV parked near the jet, and as I reached the last step, Bridgette exited the vehicle's driver side. She didn't speak at first, but her eyes and body language were full of apology. I didn't like her feeling sorry for me. I pushed through my own emotions.

"Switzerland." I spoke first, pulling the collar of my jacket higher, fighting against the wind and falling snow. "I thought you were still in Hungary."

She smiled in greeting. "With all of the conflict and utter chaos your friends caused in Seattle," I flinched at the mention of the events that recently occurred in Seattle, "the Badica murders, and the Drozdov attack, I could not sit by and do nothing. I have a job to do." Bridgette added a not so subtle dig at my decision to relinquish the title of Guardian. "I am here to help. And so are you."

"That's why I'm here? You are in on this plot to keep me from Court while Tatiana and Academy Guardians gather to justify their mistakes?"

"There is no secret plot, Bellamy."

"That's not what Guardian Price said." I used a sing-song tone, moving closer to her. "She made it transparently clear that my particular sense of opinionated logic might not be appreciated by some."

Bridgette nodded. "Guardian Price knows your dislike for Tatiana runs deep. If the Queen is in attendance at Court, it is best that you are not." She knew more than she let on, as usual. "Now," She was back in full Guardian mode, "we have business to take care of. Follow me."

She was all business and talking fast as we began a drive through mountainous terrain, assuming that I picked up on every single detail and nuance of her speech.

"I have an assignment that I need you to take care of."

"An assignment?" I only had a short window of time to voice my feelings on the matter. "Oh, I am not going to like this, am I?"

I could feel Bridgette roll her eyes beside me. "Please don't be dramatic, Bellamy."

"I'm not being dramatic. I am stating a fact. What sort of assignment have you recruited me for?"

"There is a Moroi I would like you to guard for the next week."

And here was the truth. "You want me to play Guardian? Bridge," I sighed, knowing I was disappointing her, "I've already told you and the Council that I am no longer interested in being a Guardian. My thoughts on the matter have not changed."

"I heard about what you said to the Council when you interrupted a very important session." She confirmed that she'd heard everything I said, or rather wrote, but clearly she was not listening.

"You heard, but you still don't understand why I made the decision."

"I need someone that I can trust to do this." She changed the subject back to this project.

"There are Guardians who are far better skilled than me."

"True." She agreed. "But, none who possess your uncanny ability to simultaneously charm, pry, and listen to others while reading their behavior at the same time." Bridgette explained much of the situation to me as we continued our long drive.

Bridgette was expected to escort Lucca and Larisa Drozdov back to Guardian Court, in order to discuss the new allocation of Guardians after the recent attacks. The Drozdov family, in its entirety, lost three-quarters of their Guardians. A waste under any condition. It was another moment in time that I personally felt that both Council's acted far too cautiously. While she would be at Court, Bridgette tasked me with guarding a royal whom I was somewhat familiar with. Aaron Drozdov. Aaron was having the worst sort of nightmares, having seen Guardians and family members die at the hands, and fangs of Strigoi.

"Try to get him to talk to you, Bells." Bridgette urged. "See what you can do to help. You two might have more in common than you think."

I agreed to help my aunt. I was already in Switzerland, and figured a week of babysitting couldn't hurt.

The Survetta was situated on one of the many mountain tops in St. Moritz, Switzerland. Upon arrival, it looked more like a luxury hotel than a Swiss chalet. The outside alone made one's jaw drop immediately. Humans stayed away from this side of the mountain we were currently on, mostly because of the warning signs that had been purposely posted along the route. I had seen them start at the base of this mountain, and continue all the way up our drive. Guardians kept watch here, for those who did not listen to the signs, as well as looking out for Strigoi. After all, that was the job. Below us, at the base of the mountain, was the entire town of St. Moritz, with its quiet and quaint homes, shops, people, and a lake. It looked picturesque during the day, dusted in a thick layer of freshly dropped snow.

As we entered the main building, chalet still seemed less appropriate a word. It was a hotel. There were ten rooms, each the size of a very spacious luxury apartment available within the main part of this place. Along with the rooms within the hotel, there were five cabins on the property that could be rented, within the perimeters, all more heavily guarded after the recent attacks. The cabins, while not attached to the main residence, were all as fully staffed, stocked, and guarded as the main chalet. Bridgette said that a private cabin had been rented for me, mentioning something then about needing time to myself and time to gain more clarity and perspective. Translation: She did not want me to quit. Perhaps I was also here to start my mourning process, but then again, I was also here, away from anything and anyone I knew, to make a clear and more informed decision about being a Guardian.

"Guardian Pearce." A Moroi man in his early thirties made his way over to me and Bridgette. "Lord and lady Drozdov are expecting you back in their suite. Everything has been prepared for you and we are ready for you to…"

"Don't tell me you are leaving me on my own right away." I remarked, not expecting to dive into this new mess with such little knowledge of what to expect.

"I am not staying. I am meeting Lucca and Larisa Drozdov to let them know you are here, and that you have agreed to try helping your friend." Bridgette put a stop to the man practically falling at her feet. "This is my niece." She explained to him. "She is also Guardian Pearce. She will be staying for the next few days and nights as an emissary to the Guardian Council, overseeing the care and Guardian duties for Aaron Drozdov. See that she has everything she asks for."

'Emissary to the Guardian Council.' An interesting title meant to press fear into others. This was the Council's way of diplomatically manipulating me to their will again. The Moroi man looked from Bridgette to me, smiling, pleased in a way that said he would be ingratiating himself to me for the duration of my stay.

"Guardian Pearce." I was brought to a halt by the helpful concierge guru, who made a point to introduce himself before any others could. "I am Bastien Müller." He said. "Should you require anything-anything at all, do please call on me."

I smiled back at the man, listening as Bridgette went on speaking and giving very clear, not to be ignored or changed directions.

"Why am I playing pawn to the Council again?" I asked Bridgette as Bastien beckoned to show me to an underground entrance leading to the cabin that I would be staying in.

"You are not playing the part of a pawn. You are a Guardian. I told you that I am here on assignment, and they want…"

"They want to keep me out of trouble."

Bridgette grimaced, knowing that I was on the right path to what the Council members were expecting from me.

"Bells, it is a few days. Take this time to reflect."

The first and probably not the only thing that Bridgette failed to mention was that the Survetta was a hidden escape. It functioned mostly as a place for Moroi and their Guardians to escape attacks. And, there had certainly been plenty of those lately.

"You'll need to change before meeting Larisa Drozdov." Bridgette mentioned, taking a closer look at my attire.

"Why am I meeting lady Drozdov?"

"Because you will be sole Guardian to her only son for the next week, and after the string of unexpected attacks, she is hesitant about such a young Guardian being brought in." Bridgette had not said any of this to begin with, and I knew why. I should've expected the bias against me. "I have assured Larisa of your skill and extensive training since your graduation. She insisted on meeting with you herself. Bellamy, you must not be rude or sarcastic. Please take this seriously. I am trusting you."

"When have I ever been rude to anyone important?" I should not have asked this question aloud.

"Last week." I was reminded. "To the entire Guardian Council."

I held my smirk back, not wanting to cause a row. "That was different."

"In what way?"

"They asked for my honest opinion. I gave it."

"Please go and get changed." Bridgette shook her head. She was not up to debating me on the subject. "If you're not going to act like a Guardian, you can at least look like one."

Is there anyone else here at the hotel, or in the other cabins?" I asked Bastien, joining him as he led me away, showing me around my own borrowed Council cabin. It was clear that the Council was feeling the need to convince me to stay a Guardian.

"Bastien looked wary to respond, but because of my status as a Guardian now, he gave up as much information as he could.

"Guests check in and check out each night. The only guests staying for a long period of time have been the few members of the Drozdov family. They are in the main house. They recently arrived, after…"

"After the attacks on them and on the Badica family and others." I let him know that I knew enough.

Bastien nodded, continuing to show me around. This was no ordinary cabin. It was outfitted not for visiting Moroi, but for the Guardian Council. Few Moroi were ever permitted to even see this cabin, unless strictly ordered from a Council member. The entire cabin was three stories if you included the garage that held two fully loaded SUV's. Bridgette said I was only allowed to take the cars in life or death circumstances. The next floor up was the main floor. It was guarded and secured like no other cabin. It was used only by the Guardian Council members, so the technology and security were at the top of the game. Hiding all of that security was comfort. Rather than the same strict over the top luxury of the main hotel, this cabin utilized a comfortable sense of luxury. Everything was designed in a Neoclassical style, with much attention to detail. From the Art on the walls to the presentation of the hand towels in each bathroom, everything was perfectly staged. Bastien left to return to the hotel a short time later as evening fell with another foot of snow falling with it.

A short forty-five minutes later, I had showered, changed into an outfit deemed appropriate by Bridgette, and made my way back to the main hotel.

"This is important, Bellamy." Bridgette repeated to me, buttoning the top button of my shirt.

"Of course it is, Bridge. Which is why I'm not complaining about having to walk into a claustrophobia inducing room with a smile, putting up with any and all insulting comments about my age, my skill, and the condescending looks meant to belittle me even before I start this favor for you. I can guarantee I'll walk out of that room feeling worse about myself than I do now. But, I will get through it all because you asked."

"Thank you." She smiled sweetly, kissing my forehead.

She knocked on the door in front of us, entering Larisa Drozdov's suite of rooms, before introducing me. I stepped around Bridgette, watching as the royal woman looked me up and down, effectively analyzing every part of me before she sat down in a large desk chair with arms.

"Larisa, this is Guardian Bellamy Pearce."

"Your niece?" The protest in the woman's tone and stare was undeniable. "She is…"

"She is a Guardian." Bridgette defended before Larisa could use the word 'young'.

"She is a young Guardian." It was said anyway. "Perhaps too young." I kept my mouth closed and my comments to myself. "Your aunt informs me that you have met my son."

"Yes." I gave a succinct response. What more could I say? "I attended St. Vladimir's for seven months. We ran into one another once or twice."

Larisa nodded, giving me a look that I recognized all too well lately. "Bridgette, when you recommended your niece for this position, you did not mention her exact age."

And there it was. I tried to keep the look of insult from my face, and saw Bridgette trying her best not to look back at me, silently telling me not to lose my temper. My age was the thing that most Guardians and Moroi tended to focus on first. Bridgette and other Guardians made it clear when giving me my title, there would be obstacles. I would find Moroi and Guardians alike who would question and refuse to recognize me as a full on Guardian because of my age. "Why put me in this position if that is the case?" I had asked. The only answer given: "It is necessary." What that meant, was still very unclear to me.

"Bellamy is very close to her eighteenth birthday. She is a full Guardian and extensively trained." Bridgette defended me. "I can personally vouch for her, as will any member of our Guardian Council. Aaron will be as safe in Bellamy's care as he would with me. He might be safer." Her compliment was not lost on me. She went on about the details of my training with her, Dimitri Belikov, Janine Hathaway, and also the many training sessions I'd had with our own Council members."

"Okay." Larisa ultimately relented. "I am willing to take your word and trust that this will work out safely."

One obstacle down.

"Bellamy, you are aware of all Guardian guidelines and duties. I will be traveling with lord and lady Drozdov. We will be at Court for the next week."

"While we are away," Larisa slowly said the words, coming to stand with Bridgette, "I have a request." Bridgette only nodded as the Moroi woman went on.

"We would like you to find out why my son is having such terrible incapacitating nightmares."

"That's an east one." I remarked. "Of course he is having nightmares." I had started considering this subject as soon as Bridgette brought up St. Vladimir's. The Badica's were all erased from the royal lines for no other reason than their royal standing. Then, the Drozdov's, their staff, and Guardians were next. Aaron was faced with Strigoi. That could terrify anyone. Was it any wonder that he was not doing well?

"When he does sleep," I listened to Larisa explain, "He often wakes in a cold sweat, screaming at times." Larisa and Bridgette also mentioned his lack of appetite, his anxiety, and all other signs of his current suffering. "He roams the hotel from time to time, refusing sleep."

Another forty-five minutes had passed. It was forty-five minutes of conversation with Bridgette, examining the reach and limits of the property perimeters, and getting to know the hotel staff, as well as its own hired Guardians. I was now alone in this lovely decorated and technologically advanced cabin that was being used as bribery against me. I was already feeling extremely claustrophobic. Being alone had me overthinking far too many details. I reviewed every inch and detail of what I'd been told about the events before and after Mason's death. I thought about Mason, Eddie, Christian, Dimitri, and even Yuri, and I was ready to scream out, at the top of my lungs. As day turned to dusk, and dusk turned to night, the wind grew colder and the sky darker. I had been in Switzerland less than twenty-four hours, and already I felt ready to leave. The fact that Bridgette had put me on an assignment of my own, meant that I was stuck for now. If I felt I could escape without Bridgette finding me within hours, I'd have already been on a train, headed anywhere but here, anywhere but trapped deep in these feelings of loneliness, sorrow, regret, and a feeling of being incomplete again. I was getting nowhere being on my own. I thought, I paced, I reviewed and revisited, I cried, I paced… and started the process all over again. I hoped to feel even a little less claustrophobic and disoriented by exiting my cabin. I could have a cup of tea in the main lounge. I had seen a small Bistro in the hotel, along with a bar. To my own disappointment, I quickly realized that being alone is sometimes better than being surrounded by others. Strangers all looked up at me as I entered, both Moroi and Dhampirs all watching as I crossed the expansive front room.

Bridgette made another point before leaving me on my own, to inform me that this place had one of her personal credit cards on file, and that they could charge any and everything I wanted to that card. I had no doubt that much of the staff in this place would ingratiate themselves to me and my needs for the duration of my stay, however long that might be.

"Guardian Pearce." Even after all of this time, I still searched the room for Bridgette when someone called either of us by title. "Guardian Pearce." I realized that the person was talking to me. It was Bastien Müller. As soon as I stepped into the hotel, he was helping me with my coat.

"Thank you." I was friendly with the Moroi man willing to help me in any way. "I was hoping to have a cup of tea in the bar." I explained, and Bastien was all too happy to make it happen, showing me in through to the bar and bistro.

He whispered something to the hostess, and I watched her give a small nod, peering around to get a better look at me. I was no longer dressed like a Guardian, wearing a pair of dark blue jeans and a white t-shirt that clung to my waist, nothing that made me look like I should be sitting in this particular bar either. But, I was shown to a table immediately. I was offered a private booth to myself, and as I sat down, happy to keep to myself, I saw that might not be possible.

"Can I get you anything else, Guardian Pearce?"Bastien stood, waiting for me to ask. "Biscuits with your tea? Scones? Would you like dessert?"

"I am not very hungry." I refused, seeing the eyes of the man look back at me with the same sympathy of those who knew Mason had left me forever.

Had Bridgette warned people of the other reason why I'd been shipped here, and all that had happened? Was I also being catered to because of the tragedy of Mason's death? I chose not to dwell on any of that as Bastien disappeared, leaving me to my tea. Ten minutes into my first cup, as I sank deeper into the loud intense ravine of thoughts, trying to ignore the passing glances I received as people walked by, I was again interrupted.

"The Moroi gentleman two booths down has asked for you to join him." One of the waiters, whose nametag read 'Tobias', brought a second cup of tea to me.

I did not necessarily want to be alone, but the idea of sitting with some strange Moroi man was not part of my plans. I had just lost Mason, left Christian, and I had given up Yuri. Considering the idea of being around another man, who probably only wanted to get my clothes off, was not my idea of fun. I would have preferred swimming naked in the snow.

"Please tell the Moroi gentleman two booths down no thank you." I had no intention of letting some random guy think that my attention was so easily granted. "That is a nice offer, but I must respectfully decline."

The waiter nodded, quietly walking to his left, assumable to give my declined invitation to the man. I went back to concentrating on the cup of tea in front of me, watching the steam rise as my finger trailed along the top edge of the cup, circling over and over.

"If you will not join me," I heard a distinct voice mixed with arrogance and flirtation say as a man came to stand at the edge of the booth I occupied, "may I at least join you?"

I lifted my head, my eyes coming to rest on a familiar face. Aaron.

"I do hate to sit alone." He spoke in that recognizably flirtatious tone of his.

I smiled for a second, allowing him to sit across from me. At least he wasn't a stranger. And because I did not want to be completely alone either, I would take what I could get. Besides, it was my job to guard and get a read on his troubled behavior over the next week.

"What are you doing so far away from St. Vladimir's?" He had to know that Bridgette and I were related, and that she was guarding his parents.

"I graduated early." I told him, lowering my head.

He sounded surprised, but I recalled that less than a handful of people knew that the Guardian Council had made this decision for me.

"You're kidding." I heard him laugh a bit. "So, you're here…"

"On a Guardian assignment."

"Really." Now he was more intrigued. "Who?"

My eyes lifted, meeting his and he knew. "You're here as my Guardian?"

"It appears that way."

"Why?" He was asking more questions than I wanted to answer.

"Your parents are heading to…"

"Your neck of the woods." He joked. "Guardian Court."

"My aunt is escorting them to Court, and they all want to be sure that you are well guarded." I kept my ulterior motives to myself. "Bridgette mentioned that you are having trouble sleeping. Nightmares?" I read fear in his eyes, but defensiveness in his body language. "I have them too. After coming face to face with my first Strigoi, I had the worst nightmares imaginable. For weeks after that, I was afraid to close my eyes."

"What makes you think I'm having nightmares?"

"The circles." I kept Bridgette and Larisa's deeper concerns quiet.

Aaron lifted an eyebrow in question. "Circles?"

"The dark circles under your eyes. You haven't slept in…"

"I've slept."

"Not well obviously."

Aaron went quiet. "So," I approached the first matter, "why are you still here in Switzerland?" I asked him, curious about his opinion and thoughts about why he had not yet returned to his friends and the Academy. Security had since been tremendously increased in the last few days and nights, so I had to think that he might be safer with the Academy Guardians, rather than here or anywhere else where Strigoi were still hunting down royal families.

At the thought of answering my inquiry, I saw the regret and anguish pass over his face. As Aaron sat in the booth, keeping a distance across the table, I knew what he would say. I knew that look of hopelessness. I felt it grip me when Mason died.

"We escaped. My family and I barely escaped when Strigoi attacked. We are in mourning for the Badica family." He answered, and from the shifting of his body language and his quieting volume I knew that the mourning he spoke of had hit close to home.

I did not pry, but this time I did not need to. Aaron talked on his own.

"So many innocent people were killed in the…

"The attack on the Badica's and their Guardians." I finished, letting him know that I knew about the horrible incident.

Aaron lowered his head slowly.

"Aaron." My hands moved up to my face in shock and empathy for what he had gone through too. "I am so sorry." Emotions swelled and swirled within me, feeling the loss of Mason all over again. "I know what it feels like to lose people you care for to a Strigoi."

Aaron had not yet heard much about the escaped novices and Moroi back in the states. I told him what I could and what I knew, still mourning my own loss.

"How could they be so stupid? There are age and magic laws for good reason." Aaron was in angered agreement with me. "Those novices were not ready to find their way out of a bad situation like that. It's bad enough that Strigoi exist at all," he growled, "but to purposely go looking for them is absurd." He agreed with the fact that Mason, Eddie, and Rose needed more training before being thrown into the fray.

Aaron also shared a similar opinion on these Moroi issues. "Fighting at all is never going to be a good idea." He shook his head, drinking his iced tea. "Fighting with magic is a whole new issue. It is…that's never going to be accepted. It should not be accepted. Neither Council should ever agree to that."

"I wholeheartedly agree. Which is why I'm not allowed at Court." I sipped my tea.

The two of us talked longer, discussing the students at St. Vladimir's, laws that were being challenged at both Courts, we talked about Christian and about Vasilissa Dragomir, and then we started to talk about Mason. It was difficult to talk about, but for some strange cosmic reason, it helped. Talking to Aaron Drozdov was helping me to feel a little more numb. An hour later we were paying the check, and heading out of the establishment.

You really should try and rest." I suggested, looking at the time and the staff around us preparing for daylight hours. "I'm not asking you to sleep." I was not expecting him to agree so easily, and he expectedly started fighting me on the issue, until I offered to stay with him.

Aaron was spending much of him time within the confines of his rooms these days. A short elevator ride brought us up to the floor that Aaron and his parents occupied. One needed a key to access the floor, which made me feel better about security measures, but as we walked down the stretch of long hallway, I counted each security camera, and memorized any and all potential exits from this floor. We reached Aaron's personal suite, directly across the hall from Lucca and Larisa's suite of rooms.

"Come in." Aaron offered.

I entered through two large sturdy doors, locking them behind me. The décor in the foyer and main rooms was in blatant contrast to my Guardian cabin. It was darker, thanks to the blackout curtains, but still extravagantly decorated with reds and golds throughout.

"Do you want anything?" I was offered by my host. He was stalling.

"I said I would stay, but only if you lie down and rest. Please."

He smiled at me again. "Okay. I'll go change. Give me a few minutes."

I watched as he walked away, closing himself inside of the bedroom. Ten minutes later, the door reopened. Aaron had changed into a pair of pajama pants to be more comfortable as he granted my request.

"There is a couch inside." He mentioned, pointing to what was more of a loveseat than a couch.

"I'll stay." I stepped into his room, sitting on the couch. "I'll be right here." Still I listened to protesting.

"I hope you're not expecting me to sleep."

"I expect you to lie down and rest. Sleep is not my condition."

To my surprise, Aaron crawled up onto his bed, facing me as he put his head to his pillow, his arm tucked underneath for support. His eyes were closed two hours later, lulled into a moment of sleep before I watched the Moroi sit straight up, breathing as though he had run a marathon.

"No!" He shouted, and I instantly shot up from the couch, instinctively going to him. "Oh God, no."

"Aaron." I was sitting beside him, my hands touching his shoulders. Without another word, he reached out, his arms pulling me against him. "Aaron, it's alright." My arms wrapped around his waist. "You're safe. It was a nightmare." I could feel his fear. It radiated from him as he shook.

"It wasn't. It was real. I was there. It all happened. They died. They all died violent deaths." He held me tighter and I held him in return. "Please don't leave." He beseeched.

"I'm here Aaron. I'm not going anywhere."

His breathing eventually began to settle, and his heartbeat normalized as we sat taking in deep breaths together. I thought he might settle down again as his arms released me. Instead, he was back out of bed, throwing on a shirt, walking back into the main area of his suite.

"I cannot see that again." He insisted. "I won't watch people being ripped apart every time my eyes close."

Nope. He was not going to sleep today, and there was nothing I could do to change that. I didn't want to change it now. Seeing what Aaron was going through reminded me of my own experiences. The first time that I had killed a Strigoi, the first time I'd looked into the eyes of evil, I was terrified. I was lucky to have Dimitri with me that night. But, it did not mean that the nightmares did not plague me. I was affected by what I had gone through, and the Moroi I was looking after was going through much the same thing.

"I want to go for a walk." He insisted, and immediately I knew that any response I gave might cause a row.

"It's two in the afternoon." It was not exactly the best time for Moroi to go walking outdoors. Not that night was any better these days.

"So?"

"So, I'm not too keen on risking your health more by letting you pass out from exhaustion. Can we not think of something better to do for the next several daylight hours?"

"Bellamy," Here came the argument, "I'm not tired, I'm not hungry, and the walls are beginning to close in on me. Please can we get out and go for a walk?"

Who was I to argue that last point? I was no stranger to claustrophobic tendencies. Even so… "It isn't a safe idea, Aaron."

"Safe?" My logic was questioned. "It's the middle of the day. Strigoi aren't coming out for a fight."

I scoffed at his flawed argument. "You ought to know by now that Strigoi are no longer the only thing we need to worry about."

"Humans." He was starting to get that alarmed tenor to his voice, but it change in a matter of seconds. "I guess we could always stay here and find trouble of our own to get into." He implied, his eyes locked to mine.

I couldn't tell if he was bluffing, but I was not about to take a chance either. "Outside for a walk it is." I relented. "Don't forget to wear a jacket with a hood to cover yourself."

There was little sun showing outside, thanks to the clouds and wintery weather, but it was still bright enough to drain the energy of a Moroi who lacked sleep and an appetite. I had already walked the perimeters of this place, so it was easier to map out when we were into dangerous territory. Actually, being outside, away from the hotel gave me a chance to talk and discover how far the strain went in Aaron.

"I hate feeling this way.' He said before I found the words to approach. I could sense all of his frustration. He wanted to yell as loudly as he could. I wouldn't have judged if he tried to topple the trees around us with a good shout. "I don't know how to stop feeling so…"

"Scared? Helpless? Alone? Panicked?" I tried, hitting all of the right words this time.

He nodded.

"I know how it feels. I wish there was something I could say or do to make it all disappear. There is no profound solution."

We walked in silence for a few more minutes, listening to nature around us. It was deafening.

"Thank you by the way."

"For what?" I was grateful when Aaron started to talk again.

"For still being next to me when I woke up."

He had assumed that I would leave once his eyes were closed? I liked to think that I deserved a little more trust.

"I gave you my word that I would be beside you."

To this he simply hummed a reply. "How do you really keep your nightmares from overwhelming you?" He kept asking questions.

This time I gave more consideration to my answer. More insight to his problem gave me better clarity. "I fight." The look on his face said he feared the way I might handle my own personal demons. "In order to erase the images that plague my sleep."

"What I meant to say is, we have to fight an internal battle. It is a battle that many Guardians struggle with."

"Really?" Aaron sounded almost comforted to hear that he was not the only person to find himself walking through this dark tunnel.

"We fight the demons that tell us we aren't strong enough to come through the opposite end of the horrors we have seen. We fight the thing that says we are too scared, or that we should hide, ignore the problems. We fight." I said.

"You're still fighting." Aaron noticed, and I couldn't deny telling him the truth.

"I've seen a lot of death in the last year of my life. Strigoi included."

"That's right." He chuckled low. "I never got to say congratulations to you."

"What are you congratulating me for?"

"Back at St. Vladimir's, some of the Moroi would talk. It was mentioned that you got your first molnija mark by killing a Strigoi outside of the Academy gates. You kept us safe that night." He brought up my fight with Brooklyn and the same pain returned to dig into my heart.

"That was my mother." I said to him, letting him in on one of my own secrets.

"Your mother was Strigoi?"

This was about to start a whole new conversation, and frankly I did not need the rude comments and disgraced looks from him too.

"Yes, and I would rather not discuss it."

Aaron easily accepted my request. "Is that also why you are here in Switzerland?"

"No." I told him. "I am here for many reasons. I'm here as a favor to Bridgette, I'm here because Mason died, and I'm here because I cannot be trusted to keep my personal opinions from being spoken to the Queen who is currently on Guardian Court grounds with Guardians from St. Vladimir's. Oh yeah, also I'm here because I quit. The Council is less than happy with me for that decision."

"Quit? He inquired. "Quit what?"

"A couple of days ago, I decided not to be Guardian anymore."

Aaron frowned and his eyes were full on confliction. The idea of me not being a Guardian looked to be a harder concept for him to accept. "Can you do that? What does that mean?"

"It means that I am guarding you this week, as a favor to Bridgette. After this, I will find a new path. My own path."

"Hmm." He hummed again, making it clear that he did not entirely approve or truly understand. "So you just quit being a Guardian." His head now shook in amusement. "I can't picture it. I watched you train at St. Vladimir's. You are," he smiled, "incredible. Bellamy, the only fighters better than you at the Academy, are the Guardian instructors themselves." He complimented, making me feel good about my skills, but also slightly conflicted.

""Thank you. "I said. "But, what's done is done. I've made my decision."

"Did you quit because of what you've seen? Is it because of your nightmares?" Aaron was looking straight back at me, searching for this answer specifically. "If you don't mind my asking."

"Partly." I was honest with him. "I also can't imagine doing this job without Mason. I quit because Mason died, and there was no good logical reason for him to die. Being a Guardian seems rather pointless if we are getting killed for nothing."

"No, I guess not." His tone still held an edge of deep dissatisfaction with my answer.

After not being able to sleep through the day, Aaron kept to his room into the night, tossing and turning in the darkness. I was forced to leave his room a few hours in, called down to answer a call from Kenley Price. She made sure of my safe arrival, my updates from Bridgette, and my current assignment. I knocked on Aaron's door when I returned, only to return to a bitchy Moroi.

"Please go away." He mumbled, pulling his blanket over his head. I had literally been gone for ten minutes. When did he have time to go through such a swift mood change?

"Okay." I agreed to his moody request. "I'm going back downstairs. I am going to pop down into the bar for ten to fifteen minutes. You can either go on feeling miserable in your small space of the world, or you can join me in my misery with alcohol. Your choice." I backed out of his room, leaving the door open a crack. I had a new plan, and a new way of going in depth to his problems.

Ten minutes after ordering three shots of vodka, I was finally joined by my temporary Moroi. He still looked exhausted and broken. I found myself feeling sorry for him, and everything he'd been forced to see. He had bed head, his shirt was wrinkled, and he wore the same pajama pants he'd had on when I left his room.

"You look like you just rolled out of bed."

"I did just roll out of bed."

I saw the bartender walking by, so I indicated for more drinks to be brought my way. He complied, pouring two more shots at first. I handed one to Aaron.

"For future reference, when I ask you to join me, I expect you to wear proper clothing. You are a Drozdov for God's sake."

"You sound like my mother." He drank his shot, making a face that told me he was not anticipating the strength of the alcohol. "Why are they serving you drinks?" He then inquired.

"I'm a Guardian." I replied, drinking another shot, sliding a second over to him. "Guardians are more often than not, eighteen years of age. Everyone here assumes that I am of age, and I am in no state of mind to correct them."

"Enough said." Aaron agreed and drank the second shot.

"What would you like to do tonight? We can do anything you'd like. Within reason."

He contemplated a response for less than a minute of time. "This." He said to me. "I want to do this."

"We cannot sit here and drink all night long."

"Why not?"

I did not know how I should answer his question. Truthfully, I was not opposed to using the next several hours to find my way to the bottom of a bottle or two.

"If Bridgette or your parents call, we should be sober. Relatively sober." I used Bridgette and his parents as an excuse, knowing that at some point I should expect a call or two.

"You are determined to get me out of my room."

"I think I've accomplished that part." I smirked back at Aaron, motioning to the surrounding area. "It's not my job this week to get you out of your room, Aaron. It's my responsibility to see that you are well protected."

"So, my mother didn't ask you to "talk to me" She didn't convince you to go digging around in my head to find out why I'm so…"

"Destroyed?" I knew the exact word to use this time. "Of course she did." There was no way to hide the request Larisa made from him, and I was not willing to lie to him about this. "Your parents are concerned. I am concerned."

"Given the opportunity," Aaron then tried using logic against me, "after Mason's death," he added the use of my own grief against me, "wouldn't you rather be in bed with the lights off, shutting the world out for a little while?"

He had me there. It sounded like a great idea, if it were actually possible. "Sure I would." I confessed. Lying in bed was a nice thought. Shutting out the world sounded like the easiest idea in theory, but I couldn't do it. Not now anyway. "I don't have that option." I explained. "I can't stay in bed and ignore what happened. If I crawl into bed now, I won't get up. What does hiding from my problems really solve? The world keeps moving, and time doesn't stop for death or grief." I watched Aaron's reactions as I spoke, telling him how I really felt about these things.

"Besides, every time I crawl into bed, I think about Mason, what happened, why it happened, and how it all could've been prevented. I think about the Guardians who were not there when they should've been. I think about Christian ignoring the things I've said to him about mixing magic and fighting."

"You understand." Aaron stopped me from rambling. "You get it."

"More than anyone, I understand what you are going through. That's why I think we should talk. Everything you have seen I've seen. I know the loss, the strain, the panic- I know it all so well."

His hand touched to my arm, his fingers slowly pulling away. "How did you conquer it?" He was asking the same question as earlier. "How the hell are you still standing right now?"

We both drank and I gave him a real answer this time. "Truthfully, I haven't conquered anything yet. I learned how to compartmentalize. I don't focus on it. I can't yet. If I do, I don't make it through the day or night. I fall apart, and picking myself up in pieces, becomes a full time job."

"Don't think about it." He considered. "That night is all I see. When I close my eyes I only see the blood, I hear the screaming of innocent people, I feel the hands of Guardians grabbing me, pulling me to safety as others suffered and died."

My heart sank as I watched him reliving vivid nightmares. I touched his hands, still examining his reactions and expressions.

"I have those nightmares too. Sometimes I wake up mid panic attack."

"You too?"

"Yes." I said.

We were doing more talking than drinking after a few more shots, and I had suddenly gained a better concept of where Aaron stood after the attacks, and how I might be helpful. Hours later, the sun was on the rise yet again. Aaron was quiet and comfortably sprawled across a couch in his hotel suite. He had no intention of lying back down to rest, and suggesting it was a mistake I would make only once. Instead, he was on a mission to annoy his Guardian by rapidly flipping through channels on the television. The sounds of changing voices, violence, and movie genres changing in rapid succession was grating. I could only handle it for so long.

"Must you do that?" I finally snapped, stopping him. He landed on a French news channel and met my eyes.

"It bothers you?"

"Very much." I returned. "Please settle on a channel and stick to it."

"I'm sorry." He needlessly apologized. "But, everything is in French."

"Yes. Because one of the main languages people speak here is French."

"Well, I don't speak French. Do you?"

"Yes."

"Of course you do." His response was not derisive, but unsurprised by the fact I had provided.

"And those last two movies you flipped past weren't in French. They were Romansh."

Our mainly mundane conversation halted as soon as my phone rang. The number was a familiar one. It was the hotel concierge. When I picked up, Bastien did not sound happy.

"There is a visitor here at the desk, asking to see you Guardian Pearce."

"Who is it?" I was not expecting anyone I knew to randomly show up in St. Moritz of all places. No one knew that I was here, except Bridgette and members of the Guardian Council.

The concierge master either wouldn't or couldn't reveal the identity of the visitor over the phone, so I instructed him to have the person wait downstairs. My Guardian spidey senses were on alert, and my nerves were only made worse when Aaron insisted on tagging along. We argued for what felt like an hour, but in reality was about ten minutes. I relented as we both entered the elevator, taking the short trip downstairs. The moment the doors re-opened, I could feel that this was not right. Literally no one in the world would come here to look for me. This sort of situation had me questioning each decision I made. It had me looking around the entire room before exiting.

I took in a sharp breath and felt my heartbeat speed up. Aaron and I stepped out past the bank of elevators just in time to see the dark-haired woman turn towards us. It was impossible not to recognize her.

"I thought you said that no one knows you are here." Aaron had the same questions in mind. "What is _she_ doing here?"

"I think that she is here to see Bridgette." I kept my voice low. "She asked for Guardian Pearce. Aaron, I need you to quickly turn around and go back upstairs to your room. Stay there and don't let anyone in." There was nothing ambiguous about my tone, but I could see him resisting, fighting the urge to follow my orders.

"I'm not." He refused. "I'm not leaving. What is so wrong that I have to leave immediately? Is she a threat?"

""Bellamy?" His question went unanswered as my name was called out in surprise from the lobby.

I spun around, keeping Aaron at my back as much as I could. "Hello, Tasha." The visitor was none other than Natasha Ozera. Bridgette had carelessly mentioned something about Tasha causing trouble in Idaho, questioning Moroi politics and laws. She was also causing more friction between Bridgette and Dimitri.

"What are you doing here?" She hugged me.

"My job. I'm guarding a Moroi for a few days." I feigned enough of a light tone.

Again, the look of surprise and confusion. "You're a Guardian now? Has the Guardian Council given up and decided to start employing children to fight wars now?"

Her question was met with more indignation than I should've shown. "I'm hardly a child and hardly inexperienced."

Tasha said nothing in response, but I could see bitterness in the dark of her eyes. Her gaze shifted to Aaron as he subtly came to stand on my right.

"I expect you are here to see Bridgette rather than me. She is…"

"Where is she?"

"On a mission." That was something that Tasha would've known if Bridgette had sent for her. And it was highly unlikely that Bridgette would send for Tasha while on duty.

"I did come to see Bridgette." She confirmed what I already knew. "But you will do. I need your help."

"How can I help?"

Tasha motioned to the sitting area in the lobby. I walked in behind her, my glance moving to where Bastien stood behind his desk, also watching. Did he recognize Tasha? Did he not trust her sudden appearance too? He nodded and I knew that I had his attention. I sat, keeping Aaron by my side.

"I was coming here to speak with Bridgette about these outdated laws."

"Outdated?" Sure, some of our laws were somewhat antiquated, but why would it bother Natasha Ozera enough to take so much time to seek out Bridgette?

"The magic laws." She clarified. "No doubt you have heard about the recent discussions about fighting with magic. Even the Queen has been unusually vocal." Tasha leaned back in the chair she occupied.

This was not a debate that I wanted to have right now, or right here. It was a useless and futile argument. Not to mention it was inappropriate after all that had recently occurred. It was a short stretch of luck when my phone rang again. I looked at the caller, and made a snap decision.

"If you will excuse me. It's Bridgette. I need to take this." I stepped only feet away from Aaron as I picked up my phone, and began speaking. When I hung up, I was back standing beside Aaron within seconds. I had become much faster over the last several months.

"How did you know to come here specifically?" I asked Tasha, placing my hand to Aaron's shoulder. "If you don't mind my asking."

"Is that important?" Tasha sat up, preparing to stand as well.

"I'd say it's important. Your showing up here, out of the blue, compromises the safety of others. It compromises Bridgette and her job. How exactly did you locate her?"

"That was the easy part."

"You're lying." I argued, knowing the truth, gaining more of it as she spoke. "It would not be an easy task. It should've been impossible. Bridgette never gives away the location of any mission. It's against every procedure and code ingrained into her. Hell, I don't know where she is ninety percent of the time, and I'm family." I put my hand to Aaron's back. "Aaron, it's time for us to leave." Without any hesitation, Aaron stood, allowing me to pull him behind me. He took hold of my hand, and I knew he was uncomfortable.

"You talked to Bridgette and she told you about Dimitri, didn't she?"

Yes I was gaining more information by the minute.

"She doesn't own the man. She discarded him. They broke up. He owes her nothing. If he wants to be my Guardian, she should not have a say in his choice."

"Have a restful day Natasha." I said as much as I needed, keeping my tone as civil as I could manage.

"Bellamy, I do hope to see you again before I leave."

'Fat chance.' I wanted to say, but held my tongue. Instead I smiled, ushering Aaron away from the room. He made a movement towards the elevators, but I resisted, making another snap decision.

"This way." I ordered, both of us walking calmly to the heavy steel entrance leading to my private cabin.

"I need to call Bridgette."

"Who was that on the phone?" Aaron asked as we walked at a fast pace through the long steel corridor that lead to my cabin.

"No one. That was a way of getting information from Natasha. She should not be here." I angrily said. "She should not in any way, shape, or form, know where to locate Bridgette."

Aaron still wasn't seeing the bigger picture, and the bigger problem with anyone arbitrarily deciding to show up here. I was trying to keep the way in which I conveyed this trouble calm. I was not looking to stress Aaron out any more than he currently was. He was having enough trouble containing his nightmares. Neither of us needed to think we should be looking over our shoulders at sketchy Moroi too. I wondered if Tasha showing up at the Survetta meant that she was looking for a way to discredit Bridgette? She had mentioned Dimitri, and clearly there were issues between the three that I was unaware of, but it made me think.

"What did she say to you?" I questioned Aaron as we reached the door. I pulled out my key, and unlocked the doors to the Guardian cabin.

"Nothing." Aaron entered after me. His eyes were wide and he was avoiding my eyes. I could tell he was lying, keeping something from me. "Wow. This is a nice cabin."

"It's a bribe. I've got everything you might need here." I pointed out everything within my cabin. "Entertainment on the first floor, bedrooms on the second. Kitchen is that way." I pointed towards the back of the cabin where I had a small personal sized kitchen. There's blood on hand if you need or want it."

"I should've listened to you." He quietly spoke. "I should've gone back upstairs. She asked if you were planning on becoming my permanent Guardian." Aaron hesitated, finally confessing some of what Tasha said when I'd stepped away. "Before I could answer, she made a very rude comment about you not being good enough to guard Christian."

"Oh." I replied. It was good to know how people really felt. It made me sad to hear Tasha's real opinion of me and whom I might guard. This was not something Tasha would admit to me, but in the end, it no longer mattered. Chris and I weren't together anymore.

"For what it's worth," He noticed my change in demeanor as I considered the comments made, "she couldn't be more off the mark if she tried."

"Thank you." I smiled up at him. "Make yourself comfortable. I'm going to call Bridge." I stepped away as Aaron went into the living room, picking up and playing with the many remotes used throughout the cabin.

"What did she say?" Bridgette was immediately questioning Tasha's motives and sudden appearance as I explained the situation. "What did she want?"

"Some outrageous notion about changing the magic and fighting laws. She mentioned that Tatiana is now voicing opinions on the matter." I paused, hearing the deep sigh Bridgette gave, indicating stressful situations. "Bridge, how bad is all of this getting?"

"Bad." She admitted to me. "There are arguments on both sides of that issue, but it will not be resolved any time soon." She gave another long stressed groan. "Bells," She said my name, and I knew this sound. I had done or said something wrong and she was going to reprimand me. "Bells, why are you ignoring Dimitri Belikov?" She was talking to Dimitri again? Had they made up? Did she know about any trouble between him and Tasha?

"I got his voicemails." I verified that he continued to leave me multiple messages. "I don't have anything to say to him."

"This is a difficult time for him too Bellamy." I really did not want to listen to this argument from anyone. "He is fighting for you. Talk to him, please." So, Bridgette was on the Guardian side of this issue. Forgive and forget.

"I don't have anything to say to him." I repeated.

"So don't say anything." She continued to push. "Let him talk. You cannot see it past your grief, but Dimitri needs you right now. Please call him."

I yielded. I would call Dimitri. I would hear him out. But really, what was he going to say that I didn't already know? I was tired of apologies and excuses from Guardians. Bridgette finished our call by mentioning that she and Larisa were preparing for their return. Lucca Drozdov would make his way to royal Court to further petition for Guardians. Their return to Switzerland did not mean that I was of the hook however. I was contracted to finish an entire week.

I hung up and returned to Aaron, who had figured out how to draw the blackout shades, use the dvd player, and he'd found the coffee bar.

"How is Bridgette? Did she say how things at Court are going?" He asked as I sat down.

"She and your mum are on their way back to Switzerland. Your father will stay and come to an accord with the Queen and Council. Probably another day before they get here, depending on their departure schedule."

"Does that upset you?" Aaron was currently reading my crossed arms and tense mood

"No."

"But you are upset."

I leaned back, not realizing his arm was resting behind me. Without thinking, I let him pull his arm around my shoulders. "I'm not upset. I'm in a position that will require more courage than I have, and I have to do something that requires a level of civility that I am maybe not ready to feel or show."

He kept his arm around me as we both looked up at the subtitled movie. "Bellamy, you are one of the brave ones. After everything you have told me, everything you have conquered, including death, I think that whatever you have to face should be easier than you imagine

"Maybe." I wasn't sounding as confident as Aaron.

As the movie we were half watching finished, my sense of relaxation disappeared. I'd had a two hour reprieve from my problems, but now had to face it.

"You can do this." Aaron encouraged me as I stood, pulling out my phone again, dialing a number that I probably still knew better than my own.

"Belikov." He answered his phone in Russian, not recognizing my number yet.

"Dimitri." I already sounded short and annoyed.

"Bellamy? Bells, thank God. I have been so worried." His usual soft peaceful tone was gone. He sounded both frantic and relieved. "Did you get my messages? Are you all right?"

Was I alright? What the hell kind of question was that? I didn't answer and Dimitri was smart enough to know that my silence spoke volumes.

"That was a stupid question. I apologize."

And here were more of the apologies, I thought.

"Bridgette insisted that I call you." I let him know that this call had not been my idea, and if given the choice we would not be speaking yet.

"I'm glad." He went supremely soft spoken again. "I have been worried. I asked Bridgette about you."

"Bridgette is at Guardian Court."

"I know." Dimitri returned. "Many of us have been back and forth to Court these last several days. Your aunt has been extremely vague about your whereabouts and about your state of mind."

"You've been at Guardian Court too?"

"Yes." He answered. "And I was hoping I might see you there."

Another piece of this shifty puzzle revealed. I had another clue as to why the Council had shoved me away from Court so swiftly. They were in cahoots to keep me away from Dimitri as well as Tatiana.

"I'm doing a favor for Bridgette."

"And you can't tell me where you are?"

"No." Any other time, I wouldn't have thought twice about discussing becoming a Guardian, or my current location with Dimitri Belikov. He'd had my unconditional trust. But, things had changed. It wasn't that I couldn't tell him where I was, and what I was doing. I didn't want to. Not to mention I did not need a twelve hour bitching from him about my decision to no longer be a Guardian.

"I'm glad you called me Bellamy. I want to say I'm sorry. I…"

"I don't want an apology." I kept my voice low, moving out of the room, away from Aaron. "I want to know what happened." I sounded less angry, but more determined to hear the truth.

Dimitri was silent, wary to provide details. He, much like the Council, was deciding what I could and shouldn't know.

"Here is your chance to talk to me, Belikov." I let him know that I was not letting him off the hook. "Give me answers, because I don't understand." He began by telling me what he knew, and what I already knew about the escape and the chaos in Seattle.

"I know all about Seattle." I cut him off again. "I want to know about your role. I want to know why you weren't there to stop this. You are far too vigilant to not notice something like this happening. It happened on your watch." The emotions I'd tried suppressing temporarily were resurfacing as I reflected again on all of the damage done. "What was more important to you that it blinded you from doing your bloody job?" I was growing angry and antagonistic with him.

"That is harsh Bellamy."

"It's honest." I corrected. "Talk."

"I'll tell you what I told the Council. I…"

"No!" I shouted at him through the phone. "I don't want to know what you told the Headmistress, the Queen, or either damned Council. This is a conversation between you and me."

"Alright." I heard him relent, and this time his tone was different. He sounded shattered. He sounded as though he too was on the verge of a breakdown. Not once had I ever heard this tone of voice from Dimitri Belikov. I wondered, was I being too harsh on him? Was I asking too much? No, I decided quickly. I did not think so.

"It all happened so fast." He was finally speaking honestly. "As soon as we heard that the students were missing, we did everything we could to locate them. I did everything I could to…" He cleared his throat, a sure indication that he was struggling to hide his own emotions.

"You didn't do enough." I also needed to be honest with him. I needed to tell Dimitri how I felt.

"That's not fair."

"The man I loved was just needlessly killed. He died because Guardians were too wrapped up in their own shit."

"Bells, stop." Dimitri demanded.

We were up to not just arguing but fighting. I'd never fought with Dimitri like this, and it didn't feel good. That didn't stop me. I was making him angry by not keeping my words and opinions to myself.

"You weren't there Bellamy. You don't understand."

"You're right." I wasn't going to argue that point. "I don't understand. I'm asking you to help me understand. Tell me what I don't know. Tell me what everyone else doesn't want me to know. "Tell me the truth." Stop treating me with kid gloves. I'm not some child who can't handle the bad stuff."

"Okay." I heard in his breathing that I had set him off. His reply was full of what I guessed was defensiveness or hostility. Either way, I was fully expecting him to unleash his own harsh views. "The truth is, your friends got hurt, and Mason Ashford died because they made foolish choices. You know it and I know it."

Welcome unrestrained harshness.

"The truth of this matter is, had any one of them thought things through, we wouldn't be in this situation. We wouldn't be answering to the Guardian Court, and to the Queen. The decision made only proved the lack of judgment your friends hold." His voice grew incrementally louder. "This did not happen because Guardians were lolling about, not doing our jobs. It happened because a group of novices thought that they were smarter than anyone else."

He was mostly right. I couldn't do a lot of arguing to the points he'd made. I wasn't going to admit that out loud, and it still did not excuse the fact that a significantly large number of Guardians allowed novices and Moroi to escape a supposedly "secure facility".

"If I had been there…"

"But you weren't Bellamy." Definite hostility showing.

"I wasn't." I agreed. "And I have questioned my decision every day since leaving St. Vladimir's. If I had stayed, if I'd been there, would this have happened? Could I have prevented Mason from…"

"It wasn't going to change things Bells." Dimitri softened. "Mason was as stubborn as you." Another good point. "He was going to find a way to go. That is the harsh truth. You wanted the truth. There it is."

I wanted to start crying again. In fact, I was going to start crying again. I needed to end this repeat conversation before new tears started to fall.

"I have to go Dimitri. I have a job to do." My statement was more unforgiving, as well as an unnecessary dig at his recent lack of giving a shit. I said it anyway.

"I miss you Bells." He was so good at pulling at my heart strings. My tears were already falling, rolling over my cheeks, and falling to the floor in front of me.

"Bye." I hung up and allowed every oncoming tear to fall. I was crying, and then I was sobbing, falling to the floor, and pulling my knees to my chest, struggling to catch my breath.

I didn't want to cry again, but it was impossible to stop the flood of emotions I'd kept pushing back. I was sad, full of regret, and still unable to come to terms with Mason's death. Then I'd fought with a man I still respected more than most. Even when Aaron entered the room, I couldn't stop.

"Bellamy, what happened?" He rushed over, picking me up from the ground and circling his arms around me. "What horrible person has upset you this much?"

I immediately pulled myself together when asked questions that I did not want to answer.

"It's nothing." I kept the truth from him. "I knew that my conversation with Dimitri would be rough."

"Dimitri Belikov?" Aaron inquired. "The Guardian from St. Vladimir's?"

"I'm still so mad at him, at the Academy Guardians, and at Court Guardians. They could've done so much more."

"Bellamy baby," Aaron chuckled, holding me, "it doesn't work like that. You can't blame the Guardians for what happened."

"Why not?" I glossed over the fact that he'd called me 'baby', pulling away a few inches.

"It's not Guardians leading the raids on royal families. It's Strigoi. Keep focused on the real enemy." Aaron stated far too logically for my liking. "If Guardians hadn't been there the night my family was attacked, things would've been much worse." He pointed out and I wholeheartedly agreed. "Sometimes Guardians can't be everywhere at once." His comment sank in and made sense. "Don't blame Guardian Belikov. I've seen his dedication firsthand. I'm sure he did all he could, and all that was in his power to do."

I compared what Aaron said to the things that Dimitri had stated. Damn I hated being wrong. I was still upset, but I needed to apologize to my friend. I needed to correct my own mistakes. I'd said things to Dimitri that I shouldn't have. What happened wasn't his fault, and it was unfair of me to blame him. Unfortunately, he was not answering my calls. I hung up my phone and set it to the side after my fifth message to Dimitri.

"Bridgette and you mum are back tomorrow." I mentioned again. "We will stay here until then. I want to be sure Tasha is gone before I take you back."

Aaron hummed again before questioning me. "Will you stay, or will you go?" He asked me, referring to the end of my time in Switzerland, and this time I was not sure how to answer his question.

"I don't know."

"What if I said I don't want you to leave? I like having you as a Guardian."

I was almost gutted to hear him say something like this, and I found myself wanting to stay near him as much as he wanted me to. Aaron and I stayed held together, one hour passing, then a second. I worried briefly, hearing and feeling his breathing slow. His heartbeat slower against me. I turned my head to see the Moroi fast asleep. For the first time in a long period of time, he was properly sleeping. His arm stayed wrapped around my shoulders, holding me close. I leaned back , feeling his head rest against me, soon feeling my own body tiring. My eyes started to close minutes later, letting my guard down for the first time in days.

When I woke, Aaron was in the same spot. The clouds outside still covered the sky in dark grays, snow covered the ground, continuing to fall, but evening was creeping in again. I shifted my body, hearing Aaron make a sound on my right.

He sat straight up, his arm dropping away from me. "Oh my God." He spoke, sleep straining his voice. "Did I sleep that long?"

"Yes." I twisted to face him. "We both did." I stood, stretching my body.

"I haven't slept like that in…since the attacks." He was full of surprise. "I didn't have any nightmares."

"I noticed." I moved to check my phone, hoping to see a call back from Dimitri. Nothing.

"So," Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Aaron watching me, analyzing my own behavior and my actions, "at some point we will talk about you, right?" He questioned in a non-challenging way. "Can we talk about why you made the choice not to be a Guardian? I'm tired of talking about me." He sighed, leaning back into the couch again. "I'm so boring."

"Hardly."

"Why are you really here?"

So, he wanted to play psychiatrist. I laughed a bit, not seeing the harm in this game.

"You obviously have a stellar reputation already. Otherwise the Councils would not have promoted you so soon." Aaron surmised. "My mother never would've agreed to this arrangement if she did not believe you are as good as others believe you to be."

I smiled at him as he continued his attempt at analyzing my current circumstances.

"To be fair, I'm not here because of your mother's faith in me. I'm here because of Bridgette. Three –quarters of the royal families, including Tatiana Ivashkov, have petitioned to employ Bridgette Pearce as a head Guardian if and when she ever decides to give up being a field operative Council member. Your family is especially keen to contract my aunt." I mentioned as politely as I could. "I am nothing more than a pawn in royal politics to your mother."

"I don't think that is true." Aaron disagreed with me.

"Then you are more blinded than you think."

He had the same look on his face again as he grew reflective of what I said. His thumb and index finger rested to his chin, elbow holding him up. I knew what the next question on his mind would be.

"And you?" He wanted this answer. In fact he sounded very similar to the psychiatrist that Bridgette made me see before requesting I come to Switzerland. "You are certain that there is no royal family that you could see yourself protecting? Is there anything, or anyone who might change your mind?"

"No." I replied. "As I have said, I do not think that I can live my life waiting to watch others around me die. I don't want to be the person responsible for the deaths of others."

"That's bullshit, Bellamy." He called me out. "You cannot let the death of someone who knowingly did something stupid stop you from being what you are meant to be." He reminded me of what Dimitri said to me. "You are too good a fighter to give up on us. You are too good a person to let one setback bring you to this point."

We both stayed silent for the next few seconds. I stood up, growing uncomfortable with the conversation focused on me.

"You mum and Bridgette are expected early tomorrow evening." I changed the subject again. "Until then…"

"Can we stay here awhile longer?" He looked relaxed in my cabin. "It's comfortable here. I don't feel cornered or claustrophobic." Before I could protest, he had my hand in his, pulling me back down to sit with him.

Awhile turned to hours, and as night came we ordered food, continuing to talk. At one point, Aaron had me laughing to the point of tears. He and I had more in common than I had ever assumed ; more than I'd ever thought to assume. Aaron's mood shifted as I took notice of the color once again changing in the skies outside.

"It's almost dawn.' I pointed out. "We literally talked all night long."

"I like talking to you." He said to me, genuine feeling to his words.

I smiled at him. "I like talking to you too."

"If you had told me six months ago, even three months ago, that you and I would be sitting here having an interesting and necessary conversation, I would've laughed the idea off."

"I guess life is not always what we expect it to be. Sometimes tragedy steps in to crumble the facades around us."

Aaron shrugged. "The point is, I'm glad you are here. I'm glad it's you guarding me."

"I'm glad too, Aaron."

We walked together out of the cabin, making our way back to the main building. So long as any potential danger had disappeared, I felt more at ease returning Aaron to his own space. Plus, I felt better knowing that Bridgette would return soon enough as well.

"Good night Aaron." I said, reaching his suite, sensing disappointment from him.

"You won't stay?" He offered me entrance to the room.

"I won't be far from you." I reassured him, Right out here." I stayed in the large living room.

"Okay Bellamy." He slowly leaned down and kissed my cheek, touching his hand to mine. I was not expecting the strange comfort that reached me. I didn't pull away, but gave a small hum. It was an unpredicted reaction to us both.

"There is a low key numb feeling I am experiencing right now." I explained. "I'm taking in the moment. You kissed me and for those few seconds, I didn't thinking about all of the chaos in my emotions that I haven't been able to shake off."

I hadn't closed my eyes for a full minute when I felt his lips touch to mine.

"Aaron!" I jumped back, placing my hand between us.

"I'm sorry." He immediately moved to apology mode, my shock throwing him back into a panic. "God, I'm so sorry. I misread the situation. I am a terrible judge at reading women." His eyes would no longer meet mine. "If you want to leave, I would completely understand."

I moved my hand to his arm, trying to get him to look back at me. I stepped in closer.

"Why would I go?" I pulled myself together swiftly, doing as much damage control as I could before Aaron fell into another panic attack.

"Because, I'm an idiot. I shouldn't have just assumed…"

""True." I did not disagree. "But, I'm not an easy person to read." Finally his eyes settled on mine again. "I'm not going anywhere." I assured him. "I'm your Guardian." He smiled and nodded. "Perhaps, you would know better what I do want, if you knew better what you want." I was reading the words in his sudden apology. "It's actually very simple."

"Is it?" He was not convinced of my logic.

I stepped back again, moving back into the spacious living area. "What do you want?

He stayed quiet, keeping his position across the room near his room.

"What do you want from a woman?" I clarified. "What is the first thing you want in a potential partner?"

He shrugged. "Are you talking about looks and personality?"

"No." I watched him become intrigued by my question now. "Forget about all of that for a minute. What is the first thing you think of when you meet someone you are interested in?"

"Do they like me for me?" He stated, and I could absolutely understand what he meant. "I always question why. And I ask myself' what does this person want from me?'" He sat with me.

I couldn't help but grin. "You are so innocent." I was not trying to insult him.

"I'm not that innocent Bellamy."

"You may be the most innocent person I know. Please don't be offended. I find it endearing."

"In that case…"

We both gave a laugh.

"Can I ask you a question?" Aaron returned, and I was willing to answer. "How many relationships have you been in, and which was the best?"

"That's two questions." I returned, but still answered both questions as truthfully and as best as I could. "I've only been in three real relationships. Liam back in Ireland, Mason and Christian at St. Vladimir's. My best relationship was with Mason, but what I had with Christian was unpredictable in some of the best ways. Our relationship was blood, fire, and wild desire all in one."

Aaron didn't say anything at first, but thought about what I had said. "And, what did each of them say after those relationships ended?"

It was my turn to go silent for a bit, recalling these moments in my life.

"Liam was angry. I didn't care about what he said or did. I found out that he was with me, looking to spy on me and feed information to Guardian Council members.'

Aaron looked sympathetic but I brushed the look off.

"Mason ended our relationship just before he died." I swallowed hard and felt a hand rest over mine. A comforting feeling. "He ended things so that he could date someone else. Christian hit me harder though." I said, and it was the god's honest truth. "I broke up with him shortly after leaving St. Vladimir's. And he said that 'he will always care for me'. It was a slap in the face. He was still so nice."

"Well, you are lucky." He came back. "My exes were not as kind as Mason or Christian. Lissa left without a word the first time. She ran off one day and disappeared." He was referring to the incredible and long escape Vasalisa Dragomir made with her Dhampir friend before both were eventually found and returned to St. Vladimir's. "The second time she broke up with me was worse. She actually looked me in the eye that time."

"Harsh."

He smirked. "Mia was next. Hell hath no fury. When we broke up, she shouted in public and told me that she could do better. This was after I found out that she was shagging Jesse."

"I thought those two seemed unusually close."

"Worst was Camille." Aaron went on, trying not to recognize my last observation. "What is it with you women knowing exactly how to humiliate us after break-up's?"

"Please don't group me in with Mia Rinaldi or Camille Conta." I insisted.

"Sorry. Maybe you haven't purposely humiliated a guy."

"I'm not saying that."

"Camille held semi public forums around the Academy, telling anyone who would listen that I am the worst she's ever been with in bed."

"Bad at sex?" I confirmed, receiving a slight nod. "Well, even if that were true, it doesn't matter."

Again he shot me a look of skepticism, this time mixed with disdain and insult. "Hear me out."

"I'm listening."

"What do all three of those women have in common?" I asked him the not so obvious question.

"Besides enjoying my heartbreak and humiliation?"

"Besides being lucky to be with a good guy in the first place." I attempted to heal the clear trouble the subject caused him.

He smiled. "Thanks for that. What do they have in common?" He challenged me to answer.

I had to carefully consider the words I used, wary to damage his already fragile sense of being.

"They lost you."

"I'm afraid I don't follow."

"Why did you break up with Camille?"

"I guess I wasn't happy." He said with a shrug of his shoulders.

"Why weren't you happy?"

He thought about the answer. "You are a little too good at digging Bellamy." He avoided the answer to my question.

He was not wrong though. I could pry into people's lives and sensitive subject matter with little regard to their wanting to talk or not.

"I just see what I see, and I want to know why I see it."

"What do you see?"

I smiled at him now. "I see you. You're right. Perhaps you are not as innocent as I first thought, but trauma will do that to a person. It takes our innocence from us."

He agreed without hesitation.

"Wait." Aaron furrowed his brow. "You used the word blood when referring to your relationship with Christian."

I was hoping he would either forget I'd used that word, or that he had missed it all together.

"Did you two…"

"Once." I knew what he was going to ask me. "And it is not something that I will do again. I was curious, and now I'm not." I was honest with him about the fact that I had let Chris bite me.

Bridgette and Larisa returned to the hotel a short time later, pulling up in the standard blacked-out SUV. Both were eager to see Aaron and any potential changes in his demeanor. I shouldn't have been surprised when Bridgette stopped me, pulling me to one side of the lobby, asking for a full account of my time here thus far. She looked exhausted and drained. I could only guess that it was from dealing with Guardians and Moroi from both Courts.

"So, how was your trip to Court? Are there going to changes made so that what happened in Seattle doesn't happen again?"

Bridgette rolled her eyes.

"Do the Drozdov's have new Guardians?"

"They have been given two new Guardians for the time being. They will both be arriving shortly. I will stay on with Larisa and Lucca Drozdov for the next two weeks until both Guardians are up to speed."

"Good." I was glad to hear that the family would have any amount of protection. "So, I am still free to leave in a few days?"

"Bells." Her voice changed and I knew what was coming. She was going to throw the same argument at me.

"Bridge, I don't want to discuss this anymore. I…"

"You need more time to think." She was offering. "You need time to consider this before making this sort of life-altering decisions Bellamy."

"No I don't. Please don't try to convince me otherwise."

"Okay." I was not anticipating such a quick surrender from Bridgette Pearce. "I have something for you." Out of her jacket pocket, she pulled out an envelope. "It's a letter."

"From whom?"

"From your friend." Eddie Castile."

She was holding a letter from Eddie, addressed to me. I was at a loss of how to react. Did Eddie know where I was? Had he been at Court to give Bridgette a letter? It wasn't possible.

"Eddie gave you this?"

"No." Bridgette sounded as though she might laugh at the possibility of that happening. "Dimitri Belikov gave me the letter. He knew he couldn't give it to you directly, so he handed it off to me." Her eyes lowered. "He is still very concerned about you Bellamy."

"Did you two do a lot of talking at Court?"

Bridgette rolled her eyes again. "We talked entirely too much. The two of us being in such close proximity is still very painful. We talked and still resolved nothing. He is very stuck in his opinions."

"So are you." I mentioned with a hint of sarcasm and seriousness.

"And that will always be our biggest problem."

I could not argue that.

"Tell me about Aaron. How is that going?" She changed the subject before I could go on questioning her about her journey.

I crossed my arms, preparing to provide as much information as I could without betraying Aaron's trust and confidentiality. "It will be a long road ahead. He's gone through something difficult that cannot be recovered from so easily. Moroi don't see Strigoi every day. There is no quick-fix Bridge. He's talked more than I expected him to in these last several days. He has ventured out of his room, showered, and I got him to eat."

Bridgette looked pleased.

"I decided I should hide him in the Guardian cabin for the last twelve hours until Natasha left."

"Tasha is not gone." She informed me with no love loss.

"She gave an unsolicited and unnecessary opinion about me to Aaron. Fortunately, Aaron does not feel the same as Natasha."

Bridgette and I discussed Aaron's very small progress awhile longer until our Moroi were in need of us.

 **AARON**

By the time my mother and Bellamy's aunt returned to Switzerland, I was starting to feel more like myself. It was astounding what one person could do by simply having a conversation. I knew that in the coming days Bellamy would find a way to discuss the attacks and what it was doing to me, but her presence so far was doing wonders for me. I was no longer afraid to close my eyes. The nightmares weren't gone by any means, but I was learning to control them with her help. Knowing that there was someone else that I could talk about these things with was starting to help me. Bellamy already had multiple Strigoi kills tallied, so she was fully aware of the mayhem even one Strigoi could cause. She had seen the same bloody images repeated in her sleep. I enjoyed having her near me, but wanting her near and having her near were two separate things. Really, I knew that there was only one way to guarantee her staying near me, and it was not going to be an easy or quiet fight. Bellamy was adamant about giving up being a Guardian when she left Switzerland. I needed to find a way of convincing her not to quit the thing she had been working so hard to achieve all of these years. Before I approached Bellamy however, I would need to have a serious conversation with my mother and Bridgette Pearce.

Bridgette and my mother offered a few moments to me, and I could feel by her exhausted expression as I entered, that Larisa Drozdov was not going to accept my request easily. As I entered the office my mother used in her suite, I passed by one of the new guards given to my family. He'd arrived only hours ago, but already I could see that he was nothing like Bellamy. I secretly wondered if Bellamy could take him, and the thought made me smile.

"I haven't seen you smile like that in weeks." My mother noticed as soon as she saw me. "I have missed your smile." She rushed over to put her arms around me, kissing my cheek, introducing me then to Dominic Hartley, one of the new Guardians we had received. She then promptly dismissed him from the room.

"I assume that your time with Bellamy Pearce has been productive?" My mother started the conversation, sitting beside Bridgette as I stretched out on a chaise.

"My time with the other Guardian Pearce has been well spent."

My mother gave her best fake smile, hoping to bypass the conversation about Bellamy being or not being a Guardian at current.

"Has she talked to you?" Bridgette asked me about her niece. "Has she talked about Mason Ashford or about his death? You don't need to provide details." She wanted to know.

"I'm just…"

"Concerned?"

Bridgette nodded.

"Mostly we have talked about me. A few times she let me in, and she mentioned Mason, but she has not specifically discussed his death or what it has done to her."

"You see it to?" Bridgette noted that I had noticed Bellamy's change.

"She is destroyed by his death. She isn't the same person she was at St. Vladimir's." I paused, watching both women agree with what I thought and witnessed. "She has also mentioned Dimitri Belikov."

"Yes." Bridgette said. "That is going to need settling too."

"She called him."

"I know."

"It did not go well." I pointed out the contention Bellamy still felt towards most Guardians, including Belikov.

Bridgette only frowned. "I know."

"As it happens, this time spent with Bellamy has made me consider my own future more. I am going to need a Guardian of my own soon, and I am going to ask Bellamy to be my Guardian permanently after graduation."

This pleased Bridgette briefly, but her hopefulness quickly turned to what I believe looked like grief. "Bellamy has made the unfortunate decision to walk away from being a Guardian when she leaves Switzerland."

I nodded my head in agreement. "Convincing her will be a hard sell, but I am hoping that if I plead my case well enough, she might consider staying for me."

"Her?" My mother chimed in with her opinion. "Really?"

"Yes. And, there is something I will need before I ask."

The conversation between the three of us went on for another forty minutes, until I was ultimately able to convince the two that I knew what I was doing. Sure Bellamy had sworn to quit being a Guardian after this week, but maybe, just maybe she would stay for me.

"There is a function this evening that I would like you to attend for a short time if you are ready." My mother pressed, as if coming out of my room meant that I was fully prepared to rejoin the world and its horrors.

"If you decide that you are ready to attend tonight, you should bring Bellamy as your Guardian. She may be a help to you if the festivities prove to be too much." Bridgette then advised.

"I will mention it to her."

The idea of attending a crowded Moroi function was intimidating, and an overwhelming thought, but if I had Bellamy to lean on, perhaps I could get through the night without much trouble. I could also prove what an asset she was to me.

 **BELLAMY**

We were picked up just after dusk, chauffeured in a very expensive car from the Survetta, driven to Dal Mulin. Aaron and I were expected to make an appearance at the European style restaurant just within the borders of the sleepy ski lodge town. The party or "function" as it was being called was small scaled in comparison to most that I had seen. But this night was not officially sanctioned by the Court. Besides Aaron and I, there were only fifteen other people, not including Bridgette and Larisa, who had yet to walk in. At first look, I counted exactly four other Guardians inside of the private establishment. There were likely more Guardians outside, but I did not assume. I took position near one of the doors, watching Aaron do his best to mingle and finally speak to other royals after so many weeks in hiding.

As duty required, I moved around the perimeter of the room, discreetly studying each exit, making a 'just in case' plan, all while keeping a close eye on Aaron. I returned to my post to see the royal suddenly surrounded by four royal girls, similar in age to us. He didn't look overwhelmed, but I spied the discomfort written on his face a few times. I feared that his recent memories and nightmares might be triggered if one of the girls dared to mention those recent attacks. I made ready to jump in and save Aaron if need be, but as the evening progressed, I let down my guard as much as I could manage. The girls whom Aaron had befriended whether willingly or unwillingly often made their way through the somewhat crowded gathering, but they always returned to wherever Aaron seemed to be. There were times as I kept watch, when he looked helpless and cornered, and then times when I swear he was flirting. It was an interesting show at times.

I got a break from it all as Bridgette walked up beside me, keeping her voice hushed.

"I received a call from Kenley Price." She referred to a member of the Guardian Council and High Court.

I gave a slight nod. "Any news on security upgrades or more Guardians for the Drozdov family?"

"No." Bridgette said, the sound of disappointment clear in her tone. "Kenley was calling about you." I turned to face her, fearing what might be said next. "The Council would like you to…" Her sentence and request went unsaid as I felt someone come to stand behind me.

I spun around. "Aaron." He had taken a break from the scene. "Are you enjoying yourself?"

"Not especially." He extended his hand to me. "Dance with me, Bellamy."

I gave a quick refusal. "I am here to guard you. Not dance with you."

"You can multitask." He fought my rejection. "Besides, technically, you have decided to no longer be a Guardian. One dance."

I heard Bridgette sigh, likely from hearing Aaron use my non-Guardian status against me. Saying the words and hearing them from others only made it more real.

"One dance." I agreed, suddenly very aware of Bridgette's exasperation, and wanting very much to escape it

Aaron took my hand, leading me to the middle of the dance floor.

"Everyone is staring." I I noticed, but he said nothing.

One palm touched to my lower back, bringing me closer while the other stayed clasped with mine. As he kept me close, holding me against him, I could feel his breath run across my neck. I could hear him low in my ear. It was strangely reassuring. It made me feel better for a few brief seconds. It also scared me. It terrified me to my core, panicking me.

I pulled back, looking into his eyes, searching for reason. "Aaron, why dance with me? " I questioned him. "You are surrounded by beautiful girls this evening. Any one of them would be overjoyed to be here in my place."

He grinned slowly. "Remember our conversation. You asked me what I want." I recalled the conversation we'd had. "Well, I need to take a deep breath. I want to dance with someone I actually like, someone I get along with." He explained as best he could. "I want just a few minutes in the presence of someone who doesn't have an agenda. You don't want anything from me. Do you?"

"No. I don't want anything from you." What more could I say?

We danced through the entire song, pressed close together, silently enjoying each other's company. Once the slow ballad came to its end, so did our hold. I backed away, letting my hands drop back to my sides.

As I stood back, Aaron's eyes shifted around the room, searching and anticipating danger. I saw those around us wondering what the young royal might do next. He looked fragile again, the lighting in the room suddenly illuminating his features, showing the struggles he quietly dealt with.

"Bells," He said my name, reaching for me again, "I need to get out of here. I need to go outside."

I worried as he spoke, hearing his extreme uneasiness resurfacing.

"Okay." I agreed. "We can step outside for a few minutes." I offered, letting Bridgette know that we would not be far.

Once outside of the restaurant, in the frigid temperature of Switzerland in winter, Aaron and I sat.

"Are you alright?" I got up the courage to ask him after several minutes.

"Yes."

I was not wholly convinced. "Are you sure?" I placed my hand close to his, feeling warmth radiating from him. "Aaron, we can leave if you'd like. I think you have fulfilled your obligation for the evening."

"Can we hide out in your cabin for the rest of the night?" He sounded so hopeful that I could not refuse.

After informing Bridgette of my plan to escort Aaron back to the hotel, she informed Larisa. Out of the corner of my eyes, I saw Larisa watching as I took Aaron away from the crowd indoors. I even thought I saw her smile. She looked pleased for a change, and it made me feel good. Aaron and I were in the same car, being driven back to my cabin before others could notice our abrupt disappearing act. The ride back was silent. Aaron stared out of the window, staring into the night. Once arrived, the car parked a few feet from the front door of my cabin. As I unlocked it, I felt Aaron starting to crumble again. He took my hand and we entered into our combined isolation.

"I had to get out of there." Aaron finally started speaking again as I closed and locked the door, doing my usual safety and perimeter checks of the place.

"I understand." I led him to the open area, sitting beside him on the couch. The fire was going, so I did not feel the need to readjust it.

We sat together for a bit longer, holding hands still, and watching the fire as it crackled and burned.

"You were there for me the whole time. Tonight was easy because you were with me."

I heard myself scoff. "You seemed to be doing just fine on your own." I couldn't keep the tone in my voice as neutral as I'd hoped to. "A night surrounded by girls falling on your every word." Why did I sound so suspicious?

He laughed. Did I sound as if I cared more than I should? Probably.

"That was my cousin Sophie. She and a few friends are visiting from St. Solomon's."

"Oh." I definitely sounded as though I cared far too much.

"Is it just me," Aaron joked, "or do you sound a little jealous?"

"I'm most definitely not jealous." Suspicious maybe, but jealous I was not.

"Oh." The joking tone he used turned to let down. He relaxed after several more minutes, his nerves finally settling.

"You didn't eat anything at the restaurant." I had noticed. "Dal Mulin is known for its amazing food. The chef is extraordinarily talented." With all of the food set out, Aaron had not touched a single thing. "Are you hungry? Should we order in? When was the last time you fed? There is blood downstairs in the refrigerators."

"I'm fine Bellamy." His eyes were closed and his head was leaned comfortably onto the couch. "Order in if you like."

News of Seattle and the mistakes made had now reached the European Continent. Switzerland in particular. It was all anyone could talk about in the main lobby of the hotel when I made my way through the room to check in with Bastien. Royals and novices being harmed and even killed was almost unthinkable to most, so the topic was certainly heated at times. Opinions and tempers were running high. With Aaron still resting in my cabin, I took the time to breathe. Bastien made sure not to question me personally about Seattle, and the students involved. I worried that he had already been informed of my own tragedy, or how close I was to most of the students. He offered to send tea and cookies to my cabin with a smile.

Once alone, I pulled out my phone one more time, hoping to get better results. Sitting in an empty part of the lobby, still listening to Moroi talk amongst themselves, I dialed the same number again. I got his voicemail.

"I don't know what it is like on your end, but over here there is so much commotion and confusion. Moroi and even the Guardians here are discussing the possibilities of Dhampir needing more training after graduation. It's an interesting idea. They are also fighting about royals being caught up in the field. Damn Christian." I kept my voice light and friendly still, urging him to call. "I have my own opinions on that matter, but I was hoping to hear your views as well." I wanted him to call. I wanted to apologize to him for my atrocious behavior in our last call. "I know that we may not be on the best of terms right now Dimitri, but please call. I know that you are concerned." I said goodbye and hung up, hoping to hear my phone ring immediately.

"Don't be discouraged." I heard Bridgette say from beside me as she walked up. "Aaron mentioned that you called and talked to Dimitri."

"I did."

"He also mentioned that it did not go well."

"It did not. I acted like a child. I told him he didn't do enough in Seattle." I stood, facing her. "He must be very upset if he hasn't called me back yet."

"She shook her head. "He has a lot on his plate right now. He has been very busy. He will call Bells. Give him time."

"I was not very polite or understanding during our last conversation, Bridge." I admitted, but she did not seem too concerned.

"You may not be understanding, but Dimitri Belikov is always understanding when it comes to you. I am certain he knows what Mason's death has done to you."

Nope. Not a subject I wanted to discuss.

"You look tired." She changed the subject.

"You trained me yourself." I made a point. "So, I can go without sleep for nearly forty hours before I crash."

Bridgette looked proud, knowing that I had passed all of her tests in Hungary. I had gone without sleep, and stayed on my game while tracking and hunting Strigoi.

"Aaron is finally resting. I took a few minutes to call Dimitri again, but maybe I will go and try to catch up on a few spare hours of sleep."

I turned but stopped as my aunt made a sound of uncertainty. "Before you go Bells, are you alright?"

I was pretty sure of what subject she was poking at this time. "It seems that you haven't spent much time grieving yet. Mason…" She apprehensively said his name.

"Bridge, I'm fine. Really. I'm not ready to face this, or ready to grieve him yet. I need more time."

"Understood. But Bells, Kenley contacted me." She mentioned cautiously. "The Council would like you to return to Court when your time here in Switzerland is finished. They want you to…"

"What do they want from me this time? Blood? Sweat? Tears? They've taken all of those from me."

"Bellamy, have a seat."

I crossed my arms and leaned back defensively. The Council wanted something from me, and Bridgette was in on their plans again. "I will stand. What do they want from me?"

"They are going to ask that you attend the funeral of Mason Ashford."

I blanched, unsure of what to say to Bridgette or the Council. "No." I insisted. I was not ready to start my own grieving process for Mason, let alone have it staring me in the face. Not to mention that Mason's family was allowing his funeral to be held at the Academy. I would have to face Christian, his new girlfriend, Dimitri and the other Academy Guardians, and I would have to face Eddie Castile. I was not ready to see Eddie without others around to keep me from taking a swing at my friend.

"No." I repeated. "I can't do that."

"They still want to talk to you at the end of the week Bells. I am sending you back to Court."

"I should check in on Aaron." I needed to get away from this conversation as quickly as possible.

I returned to the Guardian cabin a few minutes later, walking inside to see Aaron still relaxed and comfortably resting on the couch where I'd left him. I walked across the room, over to the granite topped bar. I stood still my hands gripping the sides of the structure, threatening to crumble the marble into dust as it cracked under my fingertips. I could feel my entire body starting to shake all of a sudden. It rippled through me, spreading everywhere. I could feel fear, regret, and mourning overwhelming me. All of my emotions were spiraling out of control and I couldn't do anything about it. I wanted to explode in this very spot. I was not focused on anything in particular, continuing to feel myself spiral after my very short conversation with Bridgette. My mind was not focused on anything around me.

"You're back." I vaguely heard a soft voice say from behind me. "Where did you go?"

"I was talking to Bridgette in the lobby." I recognized Aaron talking to me. I held my voice from shaking, but could not stop the rest of me from continuing to shake uncontrollably.

A pair of hands took hold of my arms, trying to pull me away from the bar. I couldn't move. My feet and hands were glued to this spot, but without any warning, Aaron let go of my arms.

"Bellamy!" He shouted at me, but it didn't register as shouting. Was he experiencing fear? Having some sort of regression moment of his own? I still could not force myself to focus on him. "You're on fire." His voice was sounding warped and mumbled.

Did he say that I was on fire? Was I? I looked at my arms. "Huh." I said. "I am on fire." My voice squeaked, not realizing that I had just made a huge mistake in judgement.

"Bellamy, you're on fire!" Aaron repeated, his voice coming in more clear as I snapped out of my short daze.

"Oh fuck!" I fought for control of my emotions. I needed to get a grip on myself. I was currently on fire, and Aaron was going to ask questions. I could not avoid this problem. I moved the fire from my arms into my palms, rolling it into a ball before extinguishing it completely. Aaron looked horrified. He looked awestruck and intrigued.

"I'm sorry." I said, turning to face him. "When I lose control of my emotions, I sometimes…"

"Randomly catch fire?" There was no hint of sarcasm to his question.

"Can you honestly tell me that you don't sometimes still lose control of your magic?"

"Sure." He agreed to the point. "But, I'm Moroi. I'm supposed to have magic. You're Dhampir."

"Yes I am. But I am a Dhampir with Moroi magic. "

"I don't understand. It's impossible."

"That's me." I answered him. "Pretty, deadly, and impossible."

A few deep breaths, eyes still wide, and more moments of consideration, Aaron reflected on what he had seen, experienced, and he extended his hand to me.

"We should talk. Who else knows about this?"

"Bridgette, Dimitri Belikov, other Guardians at St. Vladimir's, Mason knew, and Christian knows."

"That's it?"

I grimaced. "The Guardian Council knows."

"The Queen doesn't know."

"No!" I almost shouted, my fear showing. "No she doesn't know, and she won't. She would…"

"She would use you to her advantage if she knew." Aaron was more aware of the problem that I realized. He saw the danger, the liability, and the use for me in the wrong set of hands.

We sat down together and talked for hours longer. Again, it was nice talking to him. Aaron asked many questions, and I answered as many of them as I could. By the end, we were both exhausted.

"Can I ask one more question." Aaron sounded uncomfortable again.

"Anything."

"You have mentioned your relationship with Christian Ozera a few times. You indicated that there was a difference between that relationship and the one you shared with Mason Ashford."

All of a sudden I regretted agreeing to answer any question Aaron might pose. "What is your question Aaron?"

"Well, you also said that your relationship with Christian was full of fire and bllod."

Yes, I was definitely going to regret my promise to answer him.

"I am wondering if you ever… I mean," He hesitated to ask his question, "did Ozera ever… Did you ever let him…" He sighed in frustration, trying to tactfully ask me.

"Are you trying to ask if Christian ever bit me?" I wasn't so tactful.

Aaron nodded, and so did I, answering his question honestly.

"Once. I was curious."

"And?"

"And now I will no longer be curious about that. The sight and smell of blood makes me nauseous. The sight and smell of my own blood freaks me out."

He accepted my response and moved on quick enough, hopefully unwilling to revisit the subject ever again.

"Why don't we have dinner in town tonight. Just you and me. We can get away from this place for a little while." Aaron suggested. I didn't see the harm in a quiet dinner with him, so I agreed.

 **AARON**

We agreed to leave at eight later that night, giving us the day to relax. It also gave Bellamy the opportunity to get a few hours of exercise. I figured she was going to go stir crazy soon enough. It also gave me the short span of time to slip away and get in a short conversation with the other Guardian Pearce. I looked for Bridgette everywhere within the hotel, and it took me some time to locate her. I happened upon her in the midst of her training the two new Guardians joining my family ranks. It was a somewhat violent yet inspiring sight to see Bridgette Pearce in the training rings. She moved fast, she was quick on her feet, and she could strike a serious blow with her fists.

Back at St. Vladimir's, there had been a rumor or two circling that Bellamy had singlehandedly fought off four Guardians at once during one of her novice training exercises. At the time, I'd heard the rumor, but shrugged it off as nothing more than academy gossip. I thought back to that moment as I watched Bridgette Perace fighting, and it became clear that if Bellamy had spent any amount of time training with her aunt, the rumors were more likely to be truth.

Bridgette didn't notice me standing in the wings of the Guardian gym until I coughed. She turned to me, guiding the two Guardians to spar with each other, before stretching her fingers and pulling off the wraps around her hands. She made her way over to where I stood, allowing me to enter the training facility. As I approached her, I immediately took notice of the concern crossing her face.

"Aaron, where is Bellamy?"

"She went for a run. " I said. "She won't be gone long, so I don't have a lot of time. I need to talk to you about her."

"Okay." Bridgette was not too happy about my purposely sneaking away from Bellamy, but neither did she address it. "Let's sit." She offered me a chair closest to the entrance. "Is Bellamy alright?"

"No." I shook my head back and forth. Bridgette sat down beside me. "Guardian Pearce, please don't make Bellamy attend Mason Ashford's funeral."

"Aaron, I…"

"No, you don't understand." I hesitated to tell her about Bellamy's extreme moment of anxiety back in her cabin. "Please don't make her go. She can't handle that yet."

"It's sweet that you are so affected by her, but Bellamy is capable of handling much more than you give her credit for."

My tone shifted, and I was now pleading with the Guardian sat beside me.

"I don't doubt that. But not this." I still insisted. "She cannot handle his funeral."

Bridgette twisted her face up. Did she think that I was making a bigger deal of this than it was?

"The decision has already been made. It is out of my hands."

I couldn't let this go. For Bellamy's sake, and for her state of mind, I could not let this issue drop. "She caught fire." I stated, looking down at the ground. I kept my eyes on the floor, feeling as if I were ratting Bellamy out to her parents. I felt awful. I felt sickened.

"She caught what on fire?"

Well, I had gained her attention.

"Herself. Her arms. It was fire. I felt it." I was doing a rough job at explaining what I had seen. "What I mean to say is, she accidentally caught fire. She didn't mean to use her magic." I mentioned that I was now aware of Bellamy's secret gift. "Emotions make the elemental magic more unstable."

"I know." Bridgette commented. "Before she knew what it was, this would happen when her emotions ran high." She was in deep thought as I spoke. "Tell me exactly what happened."

"When she returned to her cabin earlier, she was having a full blown panic attack. I assume it was caused by the demand that she go to the funeral. Her arms lit up with flames, and she was able to extinguish them in her hands like it was nothing."

"I'm sure that must have frightened you." Bridgette reassured, but I didn't want to respond to that.

"She talked." I mentioned to her instead. "Bellamy finally gave up a shred of information regarding how badly she is internally handling all that she is going through.." I knew that Bridgette was concerned for her niece, and everything that Bellamy had to accept and deal with. "She touched on Christian Ozera, Dimitri Belikov seems to be a sore subject with her, and she may or may not punch Eddie Castile in the face if she sees him. Facing all of this is having a serious effect on her. If she goes to that funeral now, she is going to have a mental breakdown."

In an instant, I saw the same look of concern return to Bridgette's face.

"I will speak with her." She assured me. "Thank you for coming to me Aaron."

I gave a nod, still feeling as though I may or may not have done the right thing. "I'm taking her to dinner tonight." I also felt the need to mention this. "It might do us both some good to get away for an hour or two."

Bridgette agreed. I didn't know if I should tell her that I planned on asking Bellamy my biggest question. I didn't want to get either of our hopes up yet. I left the training facility in a hurry to beat Bellamy to her cabin. I didn't want her to know that I'd snuck out to talk to her aunt.

I ran through the hotel entrance, through the tunnel connecting the cabin. I arrived just minutes before Bellamy, greeting her from the lounge chair as she entered through the front door. She was still breathing hard from her run, and she looked even more exhausted than before.

"Come and sit. You look like you need the rest."

Bellamy walked over and fell onto the couch. She was asleep in minutes while I too got in an hour or two of much needed rest. The sight of blood spilling on the floor woke me. I could not watch the scenes in my head again. Nor could I expel them completely. Bellamy was still asleep when I woke. I watched her, seeing all of the trouble, fear, and anxiety erased from her face while she slept. She was beauty, death, and chaos all in one. How could someone so sweet and in tune with me also be one of the deadliest people in my world? I touched my fingers to her face and she stirred. Her eyes opened and I felt struck by more than her beauty.

 **BELLAMY**

 **I** woke to a hand, gently caressing my face. My eyes opened to see Aaron, barely a foot from me. I had fallen asleep for hours, and wondered how long he had been watching me. He was sat on the floor beside the couch, staring at me in the most pleasing manner. I might've found his behavior strange, if he himself were not so terribly endearing.

"Hi." He said in a low soft voice.

"How long did I sleep?" I stretched out.

"Not long. A few much needed hours. " Aaron returned. "I didn't mean to wake you. You look so peaceful when you sleep."

I looked over to the clock on the wall. Five o'clock. "We should both be up anyway." I brushed off his compliment. "We have dinner reservations at eight."

"Right." I could've sworn I heard a hint of disappointment, but it disappeared in an instant.

Dinner alone with Aaron was nothing short of spectacular. He had rented out a small establishment in town, giving us hours to talk, laugh, and eat together. There were violins playing in the background, a soft candlelight atmosphere, and a wait staff catering only to the two of us. After two and a half hours, we were three courses in, and on to dessert. It was something wonderfully Swiss and covered in chocolate. I was having a remarkable evening with Aaron. He had turned out to be a surprising person.

"Bellamy, I have an ulterior motive for asking you to dinner tonight." Aaron soon confessed to me, making me apprehensive . "I have a question that I would like to ask you."

"If this is about Christian again…" I approached, but he stopped me. I was in no shape to continue the conversation of Cristian, or my blood.

"It's not. I swear. What you and he did in the privacy of your relationship is your business."

A wistful and somewhat captivated look then washed across Aaron's face. His features were far more intense and clear in the light around us. He smiled.

"I wish more than anything that I had taken the chance to get to know you better when we were both still at St. Vladimir's." He expressed his regret in not gaining my friendship until now. "Bellamy, you are without a doubt the most amazing person I've met in I don't know how long. You're not like other people. You are strong, you're wise beyond your years, and you fight for what is right. And most f all, you don't put up with my shit."

"Well, you are not so hard to deal with once you let people in." I replied sweetly.

Aaron reached across the table, placing his hand over mine. ""You make others want to be better than they are Bellamy. You make me want more for myself." He smiled again, slyly this time. "You know, before Bridgette brought you here to Switzerland, my parents and your aunt had me "talk" with at least five therapists." A fact I had not been aware of. "Not one of them got through to me. Not one could relate to what I had been through, or what I had seen with my own eyes. You knew immediately. Turns out all I needed was a friend. A Guardian."

I had a feeling that I was now in for a troubling conversation now.

"Bellamy, I know you have said that you don't want this life. You say that you don't want to be a Guardian, but you have been at my side this entire week without question or resistance. Guardian is not just a title for you. It's not what you are. It's who you are Bellamy. And that is more important than anything."

A short silence passed as we sat staring at each other.

"You said you had a question."

"I do." He lowered his eyes slightly, pulling a box from his jacket pocket. He set the small box on the table, opening it before giving it to me.

I stared blankly at what he had just handed to me, unsure of what to say exactly.

"This is a ring." I stated the obvious, picking my jaw up from the floor. In truth, it was not just a ring. It was the most flawless sapphire that I had ever laid eyes on. Why was he giving this ring to me?

"It is a family ring." Aaron told me. "It has been in my family for generations.

My eyes turned up to his. Big mistake.

"What is it for?" My question was vague, but he knew precisely what I wanted to know.

"Well," He leaned forward, his hand returning to mine, "its purpose is to be given to someone that I care for. It's supposed to be…"

"An engagement ring." Yup, now I was sounding panicked. "I don't…I can't… We're not…" He had me at a complete loss for words. My head was spinning.

"Bellamy, breathe." He laughed. "You're cute when you're nervous. Don't worry. I'm not asking you to marry me."

"Then what are you asking me?"

"I had a long talk with my mother the other day when I told her I want you to have this ring." I now knew that he'd gone to Larisa for the ring, which likely meant that she knew its purpose. "She agrees with my decision to ask you to be my Guardian. Permanently."

He was offering me a job. A royal guard position. The idea of guarding someone that I got along with was intriguing. I looked back at him again. His eyes were full of immense hope. My heart fell, and I wanted to say something. Anything. But then, how could I outright say no to him? I didn't have the heart to do that. Plus, strangely, I felt part of me wanting to accept the offer.

"What happens when you change your mind? What happens a week from now, or a month, or even six months from now when you want someone else?" I tried not to let the sound of my voice reveal too much, but it was hard. The pain I still felt was ready to show itself.

"Is that what this is all about Bellamy?" Aaron inquired. He and I had discussed my own issues here and there, and not surprising, Aaron was more understanding than most. Sometimes he could read me as well as I read him. "You refuse to be a Guardian because you are afraid a Moroi will leave you? Like Mason?" He had hit it on the nose, but I was not going to have a discussion like this right now, in a restaurant.

"I don't have an answer right away Aaron." I returned to the subject at hand. "I think I need…"

"Time." He suggested. "Sure. Take your time."

"I need to talk to Bridgette."

When we arrived back to my Guardian cabin half an hour later, we were silent. Nothing more had been said about Aaron's request or whether or not I would even consider it.

"Do you want to come in?" I asked the Moroi as he walked with me to the door. I realized as I thought about him stepping away, that I was not ready to be separated from him just yet. His presence was… well, it brought a sense of peace. No. Not peace. Something more.

"Don't you want to talk to Bridgette?" For the first time in days, I could not read his tone.

"I can talk to Bridgette in the morning." I decided. "If you want, we can hang out here for the night. Right now, I feel like I need you near me. Please stay." I asked him, knowing he would.

Aaron agreed, taking my hand, and walking into the cabin with me. I couldn't let go of his hand. He felt like a lifeline to the past and present.

"This might sound out of place, but for the last few days, I've felt like a fog is clearing from my eyes. I've begun to feel like facing death is not going to be the end of me." I squeezed his hand gently with mine, and he stopped in place. "I have you to thank for this Aaron."

"Me?" He was visibly bemused by my gratefulness towards him. "Why me? I've been a PTSD mess for you to handle."

He wasn't wrong. He was a mess. But, I was more of a mess. I just knew how to mask it better.

"When we are together; when I'm near you like this, I feel numb."

"Thanks?"

I clearly needed to re-phrase what I tried to convey to him. "It's not a bad thing, Aaron." I clarified. "It's wonderful. I don't feel any guilt, regret, or sadness plaguing me at all hours. Talking to you started out as a job, a way for each of us to cope with tragedy and trauma, but I realized a short time ago, that you have also been helping me to see straight."

"By making you feel numb?" He still couldn't grasp my thanks.

"Yes. Feeling numb makes me feel whole for a little while. Like I am me again."

His fingers linked with mine a few moments before, were now moving across the side of my neck. His piercing eyes stared down at me. He touched my skin lightly, distracting me from every logical thought in my head. As I stared back at him, I did not want to think about anything important now. I needed a night off. I did not want to deal with the questions I had surrounding Mason, Christian, Eddie, the Council, or being a Guardian. I didn't want to deal with the life and death questions and decisions that might dictate the rest of my life. I wanted to feel numb for as long as possible.

"Aaron," I moved in closer to him, pulling my hands around his neck. I kissed him.

He pulled back a few inches, far more uncertain of my mental state now. "Bellamy, the last time I kissed you…"

"This time I kissed you, and I'm going to kiss you again." I let him know.

His hand moved into my hair, pulling me as close as he could before I kissed him. This feeling of being anesthetized was freeing. The best I had felt in weeks.

"Come on." Aaron urged, leading me further into the cabin. "We are going to crawl into bed, turn off the lights, and shut the world out for the rest of the night. Tomorrow we decide what we will and won't face yet."

I complied, just wanting to be closer to him, and to go on feeling this numbness. I walked us both up to the second floor, allowing him to enter the bedroom I had chosen. He turned on the table lamp beside the bed as I closed all of the shades, and took a few minutes to change my clothes. Once ready, I returned to see Aaron sitting on the edge of my bed. He lifted his head when I crawled up on the bed, and then joined me, his arms circling around me as I turned out the light and kissed him once more.

When I awoke, Aaron was asleep beside me. I stayed in place, trying not to wake him too. I felt his hands shift over my leg, and realized that I was half dressed. What had I done? Well, I knew. We spent a few hours making out half dressed. Normally it wouldn't be such a big matter, but this happened directly after he'd requested that I be his Guardian.

Aaron began to stir a few minutes later, his arm wrapped at my waist, keeping me close as he kissed my neck again. My fingers dug into his hair, further enjoying the need I had for him.

"I don't know if I can let you go Bellamy." He whispered to me. "Even if you aren't my Guardian, I don't want to be away from you."

In an instant, my biggest predicament resurfaced. I sat up, releasing the hold his arms had.

"Did I say something wrong?" Immediately the anxiety I felt could be sensed.

"No."

"Do you regret what happened last night?" He asked, resting back into a pillow, his arms moved behind his neck.

It was a valid question. "No. I don't." I replied slowly. I did not regret kissing him. Again, I had made a choice, but I was now doing everything I could to avoid his questioning stares. "You're not the first guy I've made out with. You're not even the first Moroi."

"No." He agreed. "But I am the first since Mason…"

"Yes." I stopped the rest of his remark.

"I thought I might hang out in my suite today." Aaron said to me, picking up his clothes. "You can take time to consider my offer, and discuss it with Bridgette. I think I will meet the two new Guardians assigned to my family. I'll see if they're as tolerating of me as you are."

I laughed out loud. "You're going to drive them nuts within hours." I retorted. "If they need a break from you, you can come back here."

He was happy for the offer, and kissed my forehead before going downstairs to find a cup of coffee. I took the next twenty minutes to shower and get dressed.

It was time for me to talk to Bridgette. I knew that she had been troubled by my behavior and well- being. I had not been willing to talk to her about my thoughts and feelings on everything, not because I blamed her specifically, but because of her support for the Council and other Guardians. Now, I needed her help. I asked her to coffee, knowing that neither of us had a whole lot of time for an in depth long chat. While waiting for her, I read through the letter given to me days ago. It was finally time to face Eddie.

When she sat down at the table across from me, I kept quiet until Tobias brought a pot of strong coffee. Bridgette poured a small cup, drinking it without filters. I added my cream and sugar before starting my inquisition.

"Did you know?"

Bridgette cleared her throat. "Be more specific. Did I know what?"

I slid the ring box I'd been given the night before across the table, my eyes staying on her, searching for a reaction.

I watched her eyes grow in size as she slowly opened the box. "Bells, this is a…" The ring caught her as off guard as it had me. "This is an engagement ring."

"No." I steadied her nerves too. "It is an offer of employment." I corrected. "It's an offer from Aaron. He uh… Last night he asked me to be his Guardian."

"Oh." She stared back at me silently.

"I haven't answered him."

"Because you don't want to hurt him? Bellamy, you cannot just disappear on him."

"I know. Actually, I haven't answered his request because I find myself giving consideration to it." Had I shocked her? No. Shocking Bridgette was near impossible. She had seen it all. "This week with Aaron has given me time to think about my choices, and why I've made them. Were you expecting me to reach this point? Did you know that I might find myself realizing what I am? What I want to do?"

"I hoped." Bridgette spoke again. "I did not have any expectations. But I wonder, what has you hesitating an answer?" She sounded more sympathetic to my dilemma.

"Emotion." I informed her. "If I say yes, feelings will be involved at some point.

"Aaron has feelings for you?" Bridgette surmised.

I half nodded. "Maybe. I'm not altogether sure."

"You have feelings for him?"

"No." I said. "Not like that. He's great, but after Christian, I'm sure that I don't want to be involved with anyone I choose to guard."

"You know who might be better at helping to solve this sort of predicament?" Bridgette smiled slightly. "Dimitri."

Nope. "I do not want him to know that I quit. I don't want him to know that I'm no longer a Guardian. I can deal with your disappointment to a point, I can deal with the Guardian Council being disappointed, but please don't make me face Dimitri's disappointment in me."

Bridgette chuckled softly. I know how you feel. I hate disappointing that man too."

"Please don't tell him, Bridge."

Reluctantly she agreed, additionally telling me that she hadn't said anything during their wanted or unwanted conversations at Court either.

 **BRIDGETTE**

Aaron was right. Bellamy was not doing well. I could see it written all over her face as she talked. I gave it a little more time, but it was not getting better. Her time in Switzerland was coming to its end, and as I checked in on her, I soon saw that she'd made her decision. She made time to call the Guardian Council to review her recent conduct, and to make amends.

As she video called to the Court, I was on edge, waiting to hear what she might say in defense to the Court. Each member of Council decided to be in attendance for her call, also waiting to hear what she might say this time. The last time she'd confronted this group of people, she had thrown down her stake, and given them a letter of resignation. At least this time, she was willing to speak to them.

She took in a deep breath. "I should start by apologizing to the Court for my behavior these last several weeks." She was off to a good start. "The truth is, I love, loved Mason Ashford. After I was told he died, my love and conviction for this job slipped." She was justifying her actions, and it was caught.

"This is not the first time that you have slipped Bellamy." Rhys was quick to point out. Guardian Bowen had always held a soft spot for Bellamy and all she endured, but her recent actions did little for him.

But Bellamy was prepared for his remarks. "Unlike Hungary, I had a moment of weakness because sometimes it feels like no matter what we do, and how much we do, nothing ever changes."

"You must learn to tread carefully Bellamy." Kenley held a more reasonable tone. "Your emotions often cloud your judgement."

"My emotions have made me stronger." Bellamy pointed out. "And they are the reason I am still willing to fight. Over this past week I have seen how many changes we can make to Moroi lives. I learned that many lives were saved during the recent attack on the Drozdov family. We have Guardians to thank for that. Guardians who have sacrificed and dedicated their lives to a cause. We don't just take lives when necessary. We save lives, and we keep Moroi alive and stable. That is what I want to do."

She had made her decision. She was a Guardian again. She was a Guardian still. I never doubted that she would come back and reconsider. Her love of this job runs too deep. Now, she only had to accept and handle the next hurdle. Mason's funeral. The Council demanded her back to Court, which meant that she would also need to make a decision about Arron Drozdov's offer. After demanding her return to Court, the Council requested the return of Lucca, Larisa, and Aaron to Moroi Court. Their new Guardians would be trained there. I agreed, make a note to stop one other place before Court.

I was busy with paperwork in Larisa's office when the doors swung open. Aaron looked like he'd lost everything dear to him. He was frantic.

"Where is Bellamy?"

I hesitated. "She is in her cabin. She is packing." I was less than sympathetic, but I had a feeling I knew which way Bellamy was leaning when it came to Aaron. She had become quite fond of the royal, even relying on him a few times for support, but her concern and reason for his feelings would likely win out. "The Guardian Council has made their demands very clear to her. She is instructed to return to Court, and then attend the funeral. There is nothing she or I can do to change the decision."

"You are leaving too." He noticed suitcases to the side of the room.

"I am escorting you and your family back to royal Court. First I will stop at St. Vladimir's and call a meeting with Guardians there. They will be made aware of Bellamy's mental and emotional state."

As night rolled around, Bellamy met me in the lobby. She had tears in her eyes, and as I peeked behind her, I saw Aaron towards the center of the room.

"Bellamy!" He called out to her. I stepped back, allowing the two to talk. "Bells, I don't care if you're not my Guardian. I told you before I still don't want to let you go. We can be together."

I was not expecting him to say anything like that. What the hell had gone on between these two in a week? What were they talking about? And what were they really doing together? I wondered if approaching Bellamy with these questions was wise? The parent in me wanted to give her a Guardian inquisition before she stepped foot on the plane back to Court, but I also did not want her to rebound and bolt.

"I can't make that decision yet Aaron." Bellamy said to him, touching his face very sweetly. Clearly the two had a connection in some way. It was nice to see. "I need to get through the funeral first."

A wise decision on her part.

She returned to me after kissing him goodbye. It was a kiss that said something had happened between them, but I made the choice to keep quiet. Bellamy was on her way back to Guardian Court, the Drozdov family was shortly on their way to Moroi Court, and I had a pit stop to make before joining them.

 **DIMITRI:**

The entire campus was silent. For the first time in weeks, I could hear the trees rustling in the wind, and I could hear the water from the lake hitting against the small rocks at night. It was almost more unsettling that the reasons behind the silence. Students and Guardians all made their way around campus, to classes, and to wherever we were required to work, but after the tragic events of Seattle, no one had much at all to say yet. My own task of conducting security checks at the main North gate were only put on hold as the device in my ear began to sound.

"Belikov." I heard. It was Alberta, and she sounded frustrated. "Belikov, I need you in Headmistress Kirova's office right now." She commanded, and I was not about to refuse the woman.

"On my way." I did not need any more bad news. I could not handle any more bad news. The school could not handle any more bad news, but as I drove across campus, my intuition said that being called to the office of Ellen Kirova could only mean one thing. As I parked the blacked out SUV alongside the correct building, I pulled up beside another familiar vehicle. It carried flags on the front, signifying its importance. It was one of the vehicles used by the Guardian Council, and clearly they too were in with the Headmistress. Once out of the car, I sprinted up the multiple levels to where I needed to be.

Imagine my surprise as I knocked and the door swung open. Alberta was already seated inside, her foot tapping impatiently. I should not have been so surprised to see Bridgette Pearce as well. After the death of a novice, especially the death of a novice who was incredibly close to Bellamy Pearce, I should not have been surprised to see any member of the Council trying to smooth this tragic event over. I had trouble believing that Bridgette Pearce would do damage control for the Guardian Council. Not to mention that she was technically no longer a sitting member of either Council. Bridgette Pearce was now part of Bureau-Ten. She was now part of that secret elite society of Guardians, who saved the world from more threats than just Strigoi. Strigoi were easy in comparison to everything else that hid in the shadows of our world. And Bridgette Pearce was one of the few who stood between us and those terrible threats. But here she stood again. Why?

"It is good of you to finally join us Guardian Belikov." Bridgette expressed her impatience. She did not move. She did not even turn. And after all of this time, I could not blame her. After our own breakup, things between me and Bridgette were strained. I was hurt when she let go, so I refused contact. After all of the years that she and I had been friends, I refused her any communication, and it had hurt her just as much in return. We'd spoken once or twice recently at Court, but the conversation was short, to the point, andgave no real information.

"Good to see you too Bridgette." I moved by her, taking a seat beside Alberta, waiting for either Bridgette or the Headmistress to say something.

"Now that we are all present and acquainted, is this about Bellamy?" Alberta was first to speak. "How is she? Where is she? I know that she and Mason Ashford were very close. Is she…"

"Guardian Petrov." The Headmistress halted the barrage of questions we had. "I am quite sure that Guardian Pearce is willing to answer your questions once you give her the opportunity to do so."

Alberta quieted, but I had the same questions.

"Bridgette." I implored her.

"I have come here as a favor." Bridgette finally sat down calmly, folding her hands into her lap, and keeping all of her well-guarded walls up.

"A favor to whom?" I knew that she could not actually say whom she had agreed to do this favor or most other favors for. Her position would never allow it. Still, I asked.

Her head shook. "Let's just say that I am here at the behest of a royal individual." I watched as she lowered her head a few degrees, and touched her index finger to her right temple. If there were recognizable actions that could speak volumes and clue me in to what Bridgette was thinking or feeling, it was the subtle ones. She was keeping something important to herself. She was keeping something important about Bellamy from us, the other Guardians who also cared for Bellamy Pearce.

"I am here to give you a heads up." She said as matter-of-factly as she could.

"A warning?" I leaned back into my chair, crossing my arms as Alberta stood nervously, on edge at the thought of any new warnings or threats.

"It is a heads up about Bellamy. This is about Bellamy." Bridgette clarified.

My interest was piqued and certainly prolonged as Alberta sat down beside me again, also anxious to hear any news on one of her favorite young Guardians.

"How is she?" The question was repeated.

"She is surviving."

I studied Bridgette as she sat across from us, talking about Bellamy in such a cavalier manner.

"That is the official answer." I said.

"That is the answer I have been sanctioned to give." Bridgette challenged me, but I could not back down now.

"How is she really doing?"

We both glared defiantly, unmoving, willing the other to back down. And, I was pleasantly surprised when Bridgette yielded first.

"She is not the same girl you knew, Dimitri." She sighed exhaustively. "She is not the same lucid and cogent girl that I raised. She still won't talk to me. Not really. She will not accept that what happened to Mason Ashford was not her fault." Bridgette explained. "The Council is afraid she might run. If she does, they won't find her. And she will not return the next time."

"Next time." Alberta and I muttered in unison, but Bridgette shrugged off the mention of Bellamy's proclivity for running.

"Not important." She looked so much sadder now, talking about Bellamy. "With his death," she referred to the death of Mason Ashford, "she lost so much of herself. It took me, the entire Council, and one of your novices to convince Bellamy not throw all of her training and hard work away. I am still not convinced that she won't run."

"One of our novices?" Alberta was curious too.

"Eddie Castile."

I knew the name right away. Eddie Castile had been part of the group of novices and Moroi who ran to Seattle. He had been hurt and drugged by the Strigoi who captured the group. He had also been the closest friend to Mason. Again, I was not surprised that he had been the one who'd gotten through to Bellamy.

"Mr. Castille's letter did something to help Bellamy. Whatever he wrote to her made her want to see this through and continue. So much so, that she has allowed the Guardian Council to offer her many assignments. She has chosen her assignment." Bridgette did not look happy about Bellamy's chosen Guardian assignment. "Actually, it appears that this assignment was all Bellamy's idea. She won't say much about her choice, other than she has her reasons, and that she needs to help this Moroi if she can."

"Which Moroi royal has she selected?" Alberta asked, but it was clear that even Bridgette did not know the answer yet.

"Until the Council confirms her assignment, even I don't know."

"When will she return to the Academy?" I requested as much professional information as I could get out of Bridgette. If she insisted on keeping things strictly professional from now on, I would do just that.

"Bellamy will arrive back here with her orders the day after tomorrow."

"The same night as Mason Ashford's funeral."

"Do not force her to attend if she refuses." Bridgette made it irreproachably clear that Bellamy was not to be forced into going to or dealing with the upcoming funeral for Mason, and I agreed.

Bridgette was stopped outside in the hall after the short meeting came to its end. She was speaking to Yuri Tverskaya of all people. He too recognized Bridgette, and was likely questioning about Bellamy.

"Do you want to tell the truth and tell me what is really going on with Bellamy? I know that you wouldn't show up at the Academy, and call a meeting unless you were worried. More worried than you let on. What is going on Bridgette?" I beseeched more information from her.

"You would know the answer to that question if you had called Bellamy back." Bridgette spun rapidly on her heels. "Why haven't you called her back?"

"I thought she should calm down before I spoke to her again."

The Guardian standing with me looked enraged. "After everything she has been through with the Council, her mother, Mason Ashford, and the inept decision making skills of her friends, you expect her to be calm? That is asking too much of her." The protective mama bear was fighting for her cub in this moment.

I pushed still. "We should expect more from her."

The look Bridgette sent me told me to go fuck myself.

"She has enough problems to deal with without you adding to them. Get over yourself, pick up your goddamn phone, and show a little empathy."

"Empathy." I almost spat the word back at her. I couldn't believe she was telling me that I should show empathy.

"Put yourself in her shoes. If you lost the person you love to Strigoi. Imagine having to hear the gruesome and violent details of that person's death second and third hand. How would you feel? Would you be in the right frame of mind a week later? I seem to recall that you were almost inconsolable after Ivan…" She went quiet, careful not to throw the death of our friend in my face. "Bellamy is struggling, and you have not made things any easier on her, so grow up and do the right thing."

In this moment, Bridgette sounded so much like Bellamy it was scary. She had a good point though. One of the reasons I hadn't called my friend back yet, was pride. Bellamy had wounded me and my pride.

"She looks up to you, and you are destroying her.' Bridgette chastised. "She is at Court until the funeral. If you call now, you can catch her between training sessions." Her words were more of an order than a suggestion. Without another word, she walked off in the opposite direction.

My phone felt foreign to me in my hand as I held it, staring down at the numbers I needed to dial. Any other time, I could dial Bellamy's number blindfolded. This time, fear and pride kept me frozen. Ultimately, I made myself punch in all of the necessary numbers. She answered on the third ring.

"Dimitri." She said my name slowly. "You took your time." She tried making a joke.

I didn't say anything. I didn't know what to say. Part of me was afraid of what I might say, so I kept silent.

"You don't have to say anything. I'll start." Bellamy spoke softly. "I want to say I'm sorry. I was out of line when we talked before. I should never have said what I said. I let my emotions speak rather than my head. I let emotion cloud my reason. I know you have been worried about me, and I recognize that."

I could hear the intense emotion spilling into her voice. I recognized the sound of heartbreak and loss. I had experienced those same things not too long ago.

"I will do anything I can to fix any damage I've done." There was silence on both ends of the phone conversation now. "Are you still there?"

"I'm here." I answered, keeping my own voice soft and level. I heard a sound on the other end that sounded much like a catch in her throat. "Please don't cry Bells." I hated myself for causing her any more emotional distress. Bridgette was right. I was only making things worse. I wanted nothing more than to reach out and hold her tight.

"I should've called you sooner." I stated.

"I should've kept my mouth shut." Bellamy added. "I have a proclivity for saying things that I shouldn't at inopportune times."

"You are going through a lot, and I failed to recognize how much, and how deeply."

She and I talked for another thirty minutes before both needing to return to work.

"I will see you soon Bellamy."

"I will be there in a few days." She said before hanging up, refusing to say goodbye.

READERS:

 **I KNOW THAT THIS CHAPTER TOOK A TON OF TIME TO FINISH AND POST. APOLOGIES. BUT I FINALLY FINISHED IT. I AM SPLITTING THIS CHAPTER INTO TWO PARTS. THE NEXT PART (WHAT HAPPENS AT St. VLADIMIR'S), WILL BE POSTED SOON. IT IS SHORTER AND EXPLAINS UNEXPLAINED IN THIS CHAPTER. UNTIL THEN…**


	10. Something Isn't Right

PART 10

"The day you called me," Dimitri said to me, his eyes still on the floor. He wouldn't even look at me after I'd confessed to him that I had quit for any amount of time, "you could've told me."

"I could've." I was not arguing with him.

"You' didn't."

"And I regret that now. I was blinded by my emotions."

"I was the enemy." He repeated my words, letting them sink in. "You didn't trust me anymore."

"You were the enemy, Bridgette was the enemy. I didn't trust anyone. I didn't even trust myself, Dimitri. It wasn't about you."

He stood, moving past me and Aaron. "Yes it was. It was about you and me. I would've helped."

"You would've pushed."

"I would have helped you. You were struggling."

"You…" I stopped, unwilling to debate this same fact with him. "Maybe you could've helped." I conceded. "But I wasn't in a place to accept it. I'm sorry." I reached out, but he walked away, refusing to continue listening. Dimitri stormed out of the room and then out of the house. I joined Rose as she stopped in the grand foyer with me.

"Give him a few days Bells."

"I just disappointed the one person I never want to disappoint." There were two men in my life who had never intentionally disappointed me. Disappointing either of them in return was crushing.

Rose gave a mix of a scoffing laugh. "You could never really disappoint Dimitri Belikov. He admires you more than any other Guardian."

"Excluding yourself." I added, gaining a laugh from her.

"Give him a few days." She advised. "Then tell him he is being ridiculous."

It was days before I even considered approaching Dimitri again. On Monday morning, once Jesse and Sophie were asleep, Yuri and I were running our errands. We ventured a short drive to the Guardian administration district, making our way in and out of multiple buildings. I was hoping to find a file on a Guardian candidate for Jesse, as well as check on any updates to the impending trial of Mason Ashford. There was no new information. The last Council member had arrived days ago, but they were spending the week meeting with the Queen and her advisory Council first.

Next I told Yuri that we should stop and pick up a few loaves of the Borodinsky bread, a traditional Russian black bread, that Jesse and Sophie liked. We stopped inside of a very small Russian bakery before returning to the car.

"You have to face him Bells." Yuri said as we made our way through the center of Court. He pulled the car to the side of the street, and wanted to have a chat about this now. "Now he knows what happened in Switzerland. He knows why you did what you did."

"I always forget how big this place really is." My mind was wandering, avoiding this conversation as I looked in each direction.

"You are avoiding the problem."

"He's mad." I pointed out.

"He is forgiving." My husband countered. "Trust me, I know."

"He's going to yell."

"At you? Not likely." Yuri put his hand to mine. "But if he does, isn't it better to get it over with? Stop avoiding him. He is your favorite person."

"You are my favorite person." I kissed him sweetly, but it did no good.

Yuri got out of the car, and pushed me to do the thing I was dreading.

"You take the car. I'll see you back at the compound after you talk to your brother."

Yuri was right. I had been avoiding Dimitri for the last few days. I hated not speaking to him. I was used to seeing or speaking to him every day. And now, I was afraid of what he might have to say.

Fortunately, or possibly unfortunately, I knew where to find him. His schedule was pretty easy to memorize after all this time. Today was Monday, mid-morning. That meant Dimitri was off duty, and at the firing range. I pulled up to the outdoor center to see him concentrated and practicing his long range firing skills. He wasn't missing any of his targets. Not that I was surprised. I parked and waited until he finished, trying not to startle or sneak up on him.

"And the award for most predictable man I know goes to…."

He froze briefly, setting the safety on his weapon before placing it to a nearby table.

"You took your time." He said to me.

I wanted to smile at his response. "I was giving you time to cool off. You were so upset when you left the Zeklos residence. Is it safe for us to talk?"

I saw confusion in his eyes. I had used the word safe.

"Of course." He spoke in that calming Zen-like Dimitri tone. "Let's sit."

I sat with him. "So, how do you want to play this?"

He didn't speak. He kept quiet, reading me and my method of attack. Damn I hated when he did this to me.

"Why don't we just sit here and talk like two rational and reasonable Guardians." Dimitri suggested.

I raised my brow in distinct question, my expression giving away more than I hoped.

"Am I so unreasonable?" He asked. It was a clear enough question for him, but the answer was not as transparent.

"You have been known to have unreasonable expectations of me." I paused, seeing the look in his eyes change. His shoulders dropped. "But no." I went on. "You are more often than not, a reasonable man. And in this case, I wonder why you are being so rational." I had to know what switch in his head had flipped when just days before, he had stormed the gates of the Zeklos compound to yell at me.

"I have had time to think." His response was spoken in the most casual way. He folded his hands in front of him.

"And?"

"And I have come to the conclusion that condemning you for quitting would make me a hypocrite."

I listened to what he said, still his words made no sense. "Do tell." I was more than interested in hearing him go on.

"A day or two before Mason's funeral, I had a short and heated discussion with Bridgette."

I definitely wanted to hear this story. "Right before the funeral." I recalled the time. "Bridgette was mad at you, wasn't she?" Bridgette and Dimitri had their differences and difficulties most days back then, but right before Mason's funeral, she knew I had been having a rough go of it. She knew that Dimitri and I were having trouble of our own.

"Very much so." He confirmed her ire. "She reminded me of my own actions and reactions when Ivan died." Dimitri had been close with Ivan Zeklos. The two had been like brothers. Bridgette once said that you rarely saw one without the other, even before they graduated. "When Ivan died, I lashed out. I was inconsolable for such a long period of time. I felt alone." Now he had that serious tone. "I cannot blame you for your actions, when over the years I have come close to doing the same. Maybe you have more courage than I do." He admitted a closely guarded secret to me. "I have thought about quitting twice in my career."

"Once when Ivan died."

He nodded. "And a second time was right after being changed from Strigoi." Dimitri confessed.

"You were going to quit after becoming Dhampir again?"

"I thought 'why bother?' Why go back to taking these kinds of risks? I could leave it all, and live a quiet life somewhere else."

"What brought you back?" I must have asked the right question, because he was still willing to reveal the answers."

"Roza." I should've guessed. "And Christian." An answer I did not see coming. "When Lissa and Christian asked me to be an Ozera Guardian, I immediately said yes. I realized that this is the life I've chosen. It's the life I want. I have never said these things to anyone. Not even Rose." He told me, and he knew that I would never give up his secrets.

I sat quietly listening to him, happy that he would share such an important and potentially life altering decision of his life with me. And now I knew that Dimitri understood more than he could say.

"I'm sorry, Dimitri." I swallowed hard. What else was there to say? I wasn't going to make excuses for the way I had treated him after Mason's death, or why I had kept this secret between me and Aaron for so long. "I haven't said that yet. I haven't apologized to you."

"You don't need to apologize. You made a very tough decision Bellamy. And, you came back stronger from it."

"Did I? If I could go back and change things, if I could change my reactions or the things that I said…"

"You wouldn't.' He still sounded so calm and level-headed. "We cannot turn back the clock Bellamy. Your reactions after Mason's death were to be expected. You were going through a terrible loss, and I expected too much from you."

He unclasped his hands, placing one to my arm. I felt comforted by him again. When I stood, he stood with me.

"Do you want to take a few shots?" Dimitri motioned for me to practice with him.

"Nope." I shook my head. "I have to get back. Jesse's mum is arriving later today, and she is bringing the kids." I mentioned the kids, and watched as Dimitri's eyes lit up. As Ivy's Godfather, he was always excited to see the little ones at Court. "Plus," I groaned, "I am attending a royal function with Jesse tonight."

"You?" My brother scoffed. "You're attending a royal party?"

"Sophie decided to stay home with the kids, and Jesse has to go. He doesn't want to fly solo to this one."

The two of us parted ways, getting on with our day, and in a better place than we were. It was certainly easier for me to focus when I was not squabbling with anyone.

 **EDDIE**

 _The door opened behind me, and for the first time, I did not care who it was._

" _Novitiate Castile." Guardian Tverskaya acknowledged me as he walked into the gym, coming to stand by the wall to my left._

 _I didn't say anything in return, but looked up in silent response._

" _How are you feeling?"_

 _He wasn't the first to ask, he wouldn't be the last, and I was beginning to resent the question. How did people think I was feeling? I had gotten myself caught up in an outrageous harebrained plan to accompany Mason and Mia Rinaldi to Seattle, to attack Strigoi, by ourselves. I'd been beaten, fed on, and drugged by Strigoi. And I had now lost my best friend during that same scheme. How did everyone think I was feeling? I was struggling to make it through the day without screaming, and through the night without the nightmares._

" _I'm getting better." I answered, not wanting to get any further into this particular discussion._

 _Guardian Tverskaya went quiet, not focusing on me or my answer for a moment. He looked distant very briefly as he fell into the transitory thoughts on his own mind. By the look in his eyes, I had a feeling he was thinking about the same person that I too spent hours thinking about over the last several weeks. I stopped what I was doing and faced him. I was looking to him in hope of an answer to my next question._

" _I haven't talked to her." He mentioned. My hope disappeared with five words. "I haven't heard from her." He was of course referring to the mutual friend we shared._

 _I gave a single short nod. "Me either."_

" _I think that she is purposely ignoring my calls."_

 _So, he had the opportunity to contact Bellamy by phone. I would keep that in mind._

" _If she has heard everything about Seattle, I cannot blame her for not responding."_

" _She's probably mad. Very mad."_

" _I expect we should give her time to process." The Guardian was trying to sound reasonable._

" _Do you know where she is?" I tried not to sound as hopeful this time._

" _No."_

" _I wrote her a letter." I informed him. "But, I don't know where to send…if I gave my letter to you, could you get it to her?"_

 _There was a distinct look of regret and sadness. "Eddie," He used my name, "if I say yes, if I accepted a letter from you, I would essentially be saying that I know where Bellamy is."_

" _But you don't."_

" _I do not." I couldn't tell if he was lying. He had no reason to lie, so I assumed he was being as truthful as he could be with me._

" _Okay." I settled, punching the closest bag I could. "I just miss her. As angry as she might be, I wish she were here."_

" _We all do. But, that is no excuse to lapse in your training." The subject was temporarily changed. "I swear, you and Bells are so similar when you are training on the bag."_

" _She still beats the hell out of me when we spar."_

" _You and me both." We laughed together, and for the first time since I'd started missing her, it felt good to even smile about her._

" _You are stepping out too early." Yuri advised. "Don't move forward until you are ready to hit. Think about your movements. Strigoi are a step ahead in the fight, so we need to always two steps ahead in our minds. Try again."_

 _I did as he suggested, attempting a few times before I got it right._

" _Good." Yuri said, leaving me to practice as he busied himself elsewhere in the building._

 _Towards evening, the space grew more crowded with whispering gossiping Dhampir. It was time to quit and return to my dorm. I saw that Guardian Tverskaya had the same thought. I figured I could catch him once more on his way out._

" _Guardian Tverskaya." He stopped. "If you do happen to hear from her…" I approached the topic a final time._

" _Eddie," I could hear it in his voice. He was considering his words as carefully as Bellamy would. He was her teacher as well as her friend, but it appeared that she had left her mark and heart with more people than me, " if I hear from her I will inform you. Maybe one of these times, she will pick up her phone."_

" _Yuri." Our conversation came to a halt. Dimitri Belikov was running towards us. "Guardian Tverskaya." He was more formal when he spotted me standing with the other Guardian._

" _I'll go. Thank you, Guardian Tverskaya." I was set to leave the two to talk before Dimitri caught my arm._

"" _You should stay." Dimitri offered. "I have news about Bellamy."_

 _Immediately I was stuck in place, curious to know where she was, what she was doing, and more importantly, how she was doing. "Is she alright? Where is she?"_

" _She wouldn't or couldn't tell me where she is, but she is as well as can be expected under the circumstances." Dimitri told us._

" _Does she know about Seattle?"_

" _She has been informed." Dimitri mentioned, suddenly looking more crestfallen. "She knows about Mason, your ordeal, and she knows that Christian Ozera and Mia Rinaldi were also involved."_

 _I winced. I could only imagine the heartbreak and hell that Bellamy was going through. I hoped that she was not alone as she went through it. I could also hope that I might see her again. Would she come back for the funeral? Would she stay away for good now?_

" _Guardian Belikov," An idea struck me, "could you help me get a letter sent? It's a letter for Bellamy."_

 _Dimitri looked wary to accept my request, and I could only guess why he might hesitate._

" _Please." I beseeched him. "If you can get the letter to her aunt Bridgette," I recalled that the two were close friends, "perhaps she would give it to my girl." I conveyed my affection for my friend. "Even if she doesn't reply; if she doesn't want to see me again, she needs to read what I've written. Please."_

 _I must have hit some sort of sympathetic nerve in him, because Dimitri nodded in agreement, willing to help me._

" _Get me your letter. I will do what I can to convince Bridgette to contact our girl."_

 _I smiled, leaving the two Guardians to speak about Bellamy, or whatever Academy business they had._

 **BELLAMY**

I had one final stop to make for the day, before I could get down to choosing new Guardians. I was meeting Shane in the royal courtyard to catch him up on anything I knew, had learned, and everything about Switzerland. I had the feeling he was still a little cross with me for asking his Moroi to keep my secrets. I arrived to see Shane and Aaron sitting beneath a covered awning. They appeared to be having a pretty serious discussion. I stood back, trying not to eavesdrop, but could hear that the two were discussing Aaron's on again off again relationship with Mia. The pair had been dating, if you could call it that, since my wedding. They were engaged at a point, but I was already well aware that Lucca and Larisa Drozdov were not especially keen on their son marrying Mia. Mia was not royal, but the biggest problem was Mia not being in good standing with Larisa after the Seattle debacle.

"I have to go deal with Mia." Aaron stood, seeing me walk towards the two. He smiled sweetly, turning back to Shane. "If you want to know the rest of the story, I should tell you about St. Vladimir's."

I slowed my walk, hearing Aaron mention St. Vladimir's to Shane. It was the rest of the story. Switzerland was only one part of the story.

"What happened at the Academy?"

"Everything else." Aaron was cryptic. He walked past me, brushing my hand with his for only a second.

I made it to Shane, and he looked far less calm than Dimitri had earlier.

"You didn't tell me the whole story." He accused. "You left out St. Vladimir's. What happened?"

""I didn't leave anything out." I countered smartly. "You asked about Switzerland. I told you about…"

"Bells, you're splitting hairs."

Maybe I was, but I was not ready to give him the details of what happened at St. Vladimir's after Mason's funeral. I was not ashamed of what I'd done, but I was not ready to hear the judgmental opinions from others. I was partly lucky when a shadow appeared to my right. Shane glanced at the approaching persons first, and I could tell by his expression that we were in for trouble. I turned to see Mason strolling towards us, Guardians in tow. Shane stood, purposely placing himself between me and Mason.

"Mase." He greeted the man. "What are you doing all the way over here?"

His voice was like a cold fire in my heart. "I was instructed to come and find Bellamy."

"You found me." I stood with Shane, moving to his side.

"I was told to give you this." Mason handed off a well-organized folder full of papers.

I saw the royal council insignia at the top of the first page, and felt my legs giving out.

"Both Councils and the Queen have agreed to a trial date."

"When?" Shane asked.

I sat back down. "Wednesday evening." I continued flipping and scanning through page after page of instruction and details. I stopped ten pages into the documents, pausing as I came to the first red flag. There was a list of people on the page. It was a short list, mostly full of Guardians. Halfway down the list I saw my name spelled out very clearly. Below my name, I saw another name. Christian would also be interrogated by each Council. I did not feel good about that, but I couldn't argue the decision after I had taken Chris to Vienna on a Guardian mission.

"The Moroi Council is asking me to appear for questioning during the trial."

"That's no surprise. You headed up the mission to retrieve Mason." Shane was careful about his words, reminding me of the events in Austria.

Mason was still standing a good five feet back from me. He had the nerve to look impatient.

"Was there more?" I inquired.

"Yes." He took another step forward, and I saw Shane tense. "I was told to bring a complaint to you."

"What have you done?"

"You assume I've done something.' Mason was extremely defensive.

"Haven't you? Who is the complaining party?"

"I am."

"You?"

"I get it." Mason went on with his martyred attitude. "You don't want to hear me complaining because you are mad at me."

"I'm not mad." I returned, setting him straight. "I don't know what I am, but I'm not mad. Who sent you to me with your complaint?"

He shrugged. "I'm not supposed to say."

"Why not?"

"Don't know. Probably because they know it's driving you nuts to deal with me. I assume they feel you and I should work out our shit."

"It was you." I took a guess. "You sent yourself. I mean…"

He laughed out loud, and Shane instantly took my hand, expecting me too lunge forward. "You think I would seek you out willingly?" He made a good point. I was nowhere near first on his list of helpful people these days.

"Fine. Don't tell me who it was." I had bigger things to worry about at this point, so giving credit or concentration to whatever game was being played was not important to me. "What is your complaint?"

"I was attacked." Mason pointedly said.

"Here at Court?" Shane asked.

"In my cell." He cleared his throat. "My apartment." He then made a correction.

"Is this some sort of joke? Are you…"

"Bellamy," Mason was insistent, "I was attacked. My guards were there to help, but I…"

His guards were with him and still he was attacked? So why was I being bothered with this? Why weren't the Guardians assigned to accompany him going to Administration?

Mason had stopped talking. He was glaring at me.

"I should've known you wouldn't take this seriously."

"Whoa." I stopped him.

"Tread lightly, Mason." Shane warned the other man, ready to step in between us again.

I stood, taking a step closer to Mason. "You can question many things about me. I have done many questionable things in my life." I dared him to agree. "But, do not bring my integrity as a Guardian into question. After what you have done, you have no right to dictate how I handle any type of situation here at Court, or as a Guardian. I will speak to your Guardians as well, and I'll relay your complaint to someone in Court Administration; someone who knows the protocol to deal with these things." I chastised him while keeping my temper in check as best as I could.

"Did you get a look at the person or persons who attacked? Height, weight, hair…?"

"He was wearing a mask."

"You're certain it was a he? I mean, it wouldn't be the first time a woman attacked a Dhampir here at Court."

Shane touched a hand to me again, his arm slowly wrapping around me, recalling the attack I endured with Katja and Illiya.

"I'm sure." Mason replied, watching the interaction between me and Shane.

"Was it a Guardian or Moroi? How were you attacked? Are you injured in any way? Someone will take photos of any injuries you have."

"Bellamy, these questions are…"

"Necessary." I finished for him. "These are necessary questions, and you would know that if…"

This time he cut me off. "If I were a Guardian?"

I didn't respond. I did not need to.

"Where were your guards?" Shane asked another question.

"They were where they always are." Mason used an annoyed tone. "They never let me out of their sight."

"They are doing their job." I made a final statement before taking what information I had, and walking away from the row about to start between me and Mason. The remainder of my day was heavily planned out. Not to mention I now had to rapidly prepare for an inquiry in front of both Councils the following day.

"I will do what I can." I twisted to see the expression on Shane's face as I was ready to leave him with his friend.

"Bells, we aren't finished. I want to talk about…"

"I know. We will. I promise."

Shane put his hand to mine, smiling. "Later." He confirmed.

I left the courtyard, returning to my vehicle, and sped off, now forced to make another stop back at Guardian Admin. I walked back in to see the same Guardian at the front desk. She was small and looked as though she had only recently graduated from one of the Academies.

"I need to file a complaint." I told her, and she began to take the little information I had to give her.

"Wait here." She instructed, disappearing into one of the back offices. I stood impatiently, plotting revenge on whoever thought it would be funny to make me Mason Ashford's errand girl. They would pay.

"I certainly was not expecting to see you today, Guardian Pearce." I heard a commanding voice come from behind me as the building's front doors swung open and closed. Lucca Drozdov stepped up beside me.

"I have a few errands to run while Jesse is asleep today." I said, greeting him in return.

"It is nice to see you since your return from Austria."

No doubt the man knew every detail at this point, about the mission to Austria. I only smiled before we both went silent for a while.

"I don't suppose there is anything you might be willing to tell me about the upcoming trial," I brought up the subject, not expecting much, "considering the Moroi Council has called on me to be its witness against the accused."

"I'm sorry," Lucca returned as I'd expected, "I am under the strict orders of the Queen to keep quiet."

I should've known. A gag order had been placed on the Council members on both sides. I was not going to get anything out of anyone.

"I understand Lord Drozdov. Thank you anyway."

The front desk Guardian returned to her desk, setting down a handful of papers. She looked at me with a puzzling expression.

"Guardian Petrov would like to see you immediately in her office." She stated, giving me the directions I knew by heart.

I excused myself from the Moroi royal, making my way back to Alberta's spacious office. I walked in, and she was happy to see me. I was not happy about disrupting her day and her responsibilities for the Court. I went through the process of telling her about Mason's complaint, and then explained why I had been sent to give it.

"I assure you, it was no one in this building who made the request that he bring his complaints to you." Alberta made very clear. "You have enough on your plate as it is. No to mention," her voice was sympathetic, "I know your history with Mr. Ashford is a dangerous subject, and that the two of you are not…"

"We are not on the best of terms." I diplomatically cited the fact that Mason and I could not go five bloody minutes in the same space without one of us screaming at the other.

"It was not anyone in this building." I thought out loud as we spoke. "But, do you know who it was to give Mason the order?"

Sheepishly, Alberta gave a nod.

"But you will not tell me either."

"I have been sworn not to say." I was getting so tired of secrets. "I can say that it was done with the best of intentions."

"You know what they say about the best of intentions." My tone was as derisive as I could sound. "If that is the case, it brings only one person to mind."

"It was not Dimitri Belikov."

I sat for a moment longer, running my hands through my hair.

"What do I do about this trial? I only have two days to prepare." We had also briefly discussed the few details I knew.

My former instructor, and now friend stood, moving to a cabinet at the side of her desk. "You do as you would with anyone else, in any other circumstance. Stand your ground." She advised me. "Be yourself. You are an honest person, even under the worst of conditions. Be that same girl, Bellamy."

Alberta spoke as if she had known me my entire life. It felt good. I felt as though I were talking to Bridgette sometimes.

"You have been through more than most Guardians Bellamy."

"I'm worried about saying the wrong thing. I'm worried that I will do more harm than good with my honesty. You know how often it gets me into trouble."

She grinned. "It has also kept you out of trouble. Trust that." She then looked more reflective. "Let me ask," And clearly she was in an interrogating mood herself, "are you afraid they will sentence him to death?"

"My drawn out sigh said much. "I'm afraid that they will. And, I'm afraid that they won't. Honestly, I don't know which answer I am more afraid to hear."

"There!" I thought she might shout. "That is exactly the honesty you need to use when being questioned tomorrow."

I agreed to do as she suggested. She also suggested that I get some rest for the remainder of the day. That was not going to happen.

"Too much to focus on." I said. "Jess and Sophie both need new Guardians." I piqued her interest.

"Anyone specific in mind yet?"

"Maybe." I was hesitant to reveal the candidate I had in mind for Jesse. "One."

"Out of how many?"

"I lost count."

 **MASON**

"That girl is never going to forgive me, is she?" I leaned back as we watched Bellamy drive away. "Do you think she'll ever look me in the eye again?"

Shane smiled, visibly unsure of what to say to me. "This is Bellamy Pearce we are talking about."

I laughed a little. "Is that your way of saying that I haven't got a shot in hell at being on civil terms with her?"

"It's my way of saying she's been through every level of hell, and it took her a long time to come back to us."

The look in his eyes was much different than I had seen in these last several weeks when bringing up Bellamy with Shane. This was a look I had not seen since we were all back at the Academy.

I gave a shorter sigh. "I need to ask you something." I said solemnly. "Depending on the verdict at my trial, I might not get another chance, so I need to know. How bad was it? Others have their versions and opinions, but I want to hear it from you."

Shane knew exactly what I was referring to. He knew what I wanted to know. His eyes turned away, and his shoulders dropped.

"Looking back," We both heard before Shane could start talking, "there was a change in her eyes." The voice was one of the few I had wanted to hear after all these weeks of silence and isolation.

"Eddie." I spun around to see the person I once knew so well. He stood a good five feet away from me, and I noticed every change in his face.

"I thought you weren't supposed to talk to me yet." I was not trying to goad him into a conflict, but I worried that Bellamy would blame me for this confrontation. She did not trust me, and these days she blamed even the slightest change in weather on me. I did not want to face her wrath for something I had not planned, even if I was happy to see Eddie Castile. "Bellamy said that we aren't supposed to see or speak to each other. There is an order, and she made it abundantly clear that I…"

"That's her rule." Eddie defiantly interrupted my protest.

"I am under the impression that her orders get followed like a law. She'll blame me if she knows you're here without her consent." I countered.

"What Bellamy doesn't know this time, won't hurt her." I saw Eddie look around m, giving Shane a look that said not to say anything to her, or argue his decision. "You've been asking questions since you returned to Court. You have talked to Bellamy," I scoffed, "you've talked to Rose, to Shane, Dimitri, and I heard you were given permission to sit down with Aaron Drozdov." There was another look given in Shane's general direction. "How about you talk to me." It wasn't a question or request.

"None of us saw the exact moment when the changes occurred." Eddie started. "I should've. He was still feeling guilt about her? "I couldn't see past my own guilt, regret, and my grief." His eyes met mine. Now I could see the damage I had done to him. "Your death set something off in that girl. She wasn't just shattered by your death. She was so damaged that repair was impossible. You will never understand how hard it was for us to see her fall apart like that."

"She was broken." Shane added in a pained whisper.

"Bellamy had to rebuild herself piece by piece, into a completely different girl. You are right for thinking she is not the same girl you knew. She was changed in some of the best and worst ways. We were all changed, but Bellamy took the longest time to level out." Eddie took a single step towards me. "Now you're here, standing in front of her, back from the dead, and I'll be damned if I see her destroyed by you all over again. I won't see her fall like that again."

"I don't want to destroy her." I told both men. "I never wanted that."

I could see the rage and hostility forming in Eddie's eyes.

"And what about me?"

"You? I didn't… Is that why you're here? You want to blame me too?"

"I'm here for Bellamy. I will protect her for the rest of my life. What you did had repercussions in all of our lives. What you did was selfish. You didn't think about anyone but yourself." Somewhere along the line of this conversation, I had incited Eddie's wrath. Never a smart idea, as it could match Bellamy's wrath any day.

"So she was in love with Ozera too, so you had a broken heart. We all go through heartbreak. It's part of growing and growing up. You don't throw in the towel because some girl goes looking for what she needs somewhere else." Eddie was irate, but to call Bellamy 'some girl', was nowhere close to accurate.

"Some girl?" I returned spitefully. "You and I know that Bellamy was never just any normal girl. She was…"

"You didn't love her!" He shouted.

Shane was on his feet again, facing us as we fought, continuing to keep the guards that followed me to the side.

"You never really loved her. You still have no idea what love is. It's sacrifice and putting the other person first. It's selflessness. It's what you see in Bellamy and Yuri, or Rose and Dimitri." Eddie used both Rose and Bellamy against me now. "You were everything to Bellamy, and when Rose returned, you thought you could…"

"Huh. You sound more jealous than concerned."

"Are you kidding? She broke my heart too." He admitted. "She chose you. She broke many hearts with her decision. You had her." I could hear that protectiveness rising in him again. The place Bellamy held in Eddie's heart was deep. He would kill for her. "You had all of her you lucky bastard, and you were playing with her emotions. You let her believe she was the only one you cared for. Is there any doubt why she fell apart then, or why she is now?"

I held back another scoff. "Bellamy's problem is not me this time around. It's her."

Eddie lunged as I gave my opinion, caught at the last second by Shane, moving swiftly between the two of us. My guards were with Shane, all three separating us, pushing us back away from each other. Shane was speaking low to Eddie, his hands keeping the man in place as they talked. Another couple of seconds, and my guards were escorting me far away from the continuing conflict in my life.

 **AARON**

"This is no longer up for discussion." My father was trying not to raise his voice as he and my mother joined forces in the same debate we had at every other family dinner. Again we were "discussing" my on again, off again relationship with Mia Rinaldi. Mia and I had been officially dating, if you could call it that, since Bellamy and Yuri's wedding. We ended things shorty after Rose and Dimitri's Court wedding ceremony, after Mia and I lost our child. She was expectedly upset, and blamed me, complaining that I was not giving her the support and attention she deserved. She said that I had been preoccupied with other royals and responsibilities. We reconciled again shortly thereafter, but things were never the same. My mind and heart often drifted in other directions.

Unfortunately, neither of my parents ever truly approved of Mia. She was not royal, and she was not in great standing with many at Court, after the Seattle affair. After a longer than needed debate over my personal life, and a few threats to arrange a new relationship, I walked out of the room. I found my Guardian and friend standing at attention outside of the room.

Shane looked more troubled than he had since we last spoke. He had more questions after learning about Switzerland.

"I know I probably shouldn't ask." He kept his voice low as we walked through the house. "Maybe I should." He wavered, not really knowing if he wanted his questions answered or not.

"What is it?"

Shane inhaled deeply before diving in.

"Are you in love with her?" He looked as though he were intruding on some new secret that I was keeping from him.

"No." I denied, but his suspicions that I was hiding something bigger than Switzerland were not gone. In a way, I was hiding more, but I feared what divulging the information might do to others.

"Were you ever in love with her?"

This was a more difficult and far more complex answer.

"I…" As my Guardian, Shane felt as though secrets should not exist between us. I agreed. "I may have been in love at one point, but that was a long time ago."

"At St. Vladimir's?"

"Yes."

"What will you do now?"

"About Bellamy?"

"About Mia." Shane corrected, dropping the subject of St. Vladimir's temporarily.

"I don't really know yet. What choice have I got?"

"As much as we all love Mia," He was comforting, "your parents are never going to sign off on a marriage to her. They'd rather cut you off financially before letting that happen." He joked, but his joke was not too far-fetched.

We separated, and I left to speak with Mia. This was not going to be a composed or reasonable conversation.

 **BELLAMY**

By the time I finished all of my planned and unforeseen errands for the day, it was time to meet Jesse's mother at the airfield. It was a short drive, and Yuri was already waiting in the receiving room inside of the hangar.

"You look exhausted." He pointed out, kissing me and pulling me close as soon as I entered.

"Good." I replied back, grateful to have a few minutes to ourselves again. "I look the way that I feel." I proceeded to give him quick updates about the trial and my day, including my latest short unsolicited interaction with Mason.

"That kid has a lot of nerve." Yuri was displeased to hear about the things Mason had to say to me.

Not long after our conversation, the expected jet was pulling into the hangar, rolling to its final stop. As the pilots powered down the jet, the first of Ekaterina's Guardians disembarked. Celil Demir waved a hand at Yuri and I as we made our way to the small set of stairs.

"Hello Bellamy." Celil's distinct Turkish accent greeted me. He smiled, greeting Yuri as well.

The two men quietly started to speak as I waited in place, finally seeing two little bodies appear in the same doorway. Jaden and Ivy Zeklos were now both in primary school at St. Vladimir's. While Dimitri, Yuri, and I had voted for St. Basil's Academy, Jesse and Sophie ultimately decided that St. Vladimir's was the better fit for the time being. Jaden rushed down the steps, his blond hair shining under the lights above. The little kid flew into my arms, hugging me as soon as he was descended. I was not just Jesse's head Guard, but also godmother to his son. Ivy also hugged me before rushing to the arms of her own godfather. Yuri picked the little girl up into his arms, laughing as Ivy giggled. The children would be here at Court only for a few days while on short holiday from school.

Ekaterina appeared next, looking royal in every way. She smiled brightly at me and Yuri, also greeting us both with familiarity. Where Howard Zeklos was more formal and rigid with Guardians, his wife was friendly to us all.

"It is good to see you again, Bellamy." She spoke "It has been too long."

I agreed. It had been months since I'd last seen Ekaterina, while Jesse and I chose to stay in the UK when we were not traveling for his Court position.

"How is my son?"

"Happy and healthy." I updated her with information. "He and Sophie are excited to see you and the kids."

With that, Ekaterina was ready to head home. Once she and the children were buckled into their car with Guardians, three cars all drove away.

We soon arrived back to the Zeklos property close to seven-thirty. Jesse and Sophie were already awake, wandering the house. Ekaterina was first to greet her son and daughter-in-law, as she stepped into the open foyer. The two parents then proceeded to hug their very missed children, enthusiastically listening to both little ones talking a mile a minute about school, their new hobbies, and their friends. Once the kids took off into the house, Jesse stopped me at the base of the staircase.

"Are you okay?" I could see in his eyes that he was inquiring about some specific event, although I was not willing to wager a guess at what.

"I'm fine. Are you okay?" I flipped the question to him. "How did you sleep?" I placed my palm to his cheek.

The expression I'd seen seconds ago, grew increasingly troubled. "Well, that's the thing. You see, I…"

"Bells," Sophie was exceptionally excited, interrupting us, "I have a gift for you. We have a gift for you.' The woman was unwilling to hide her elation. "Since you are graciously attending this party tonight with Jesse," her hand ran sweetly through her husband's hair, "he thought that you might like a gift. I helped pick it out."

My head turned to my Moroi, my apathy for receiving gifts from him displayed on my face.

"What have you done?"

Jesse shrugged, his own indifference rivaling mine. "It was delivered an hour ago. The box is on your bed."

I wanted to finish the conversation we'd started moments ago, prepared to dig into whatever was bothering him, but I could sense him sharing in his wife's anticipation.

There was indeed a large black clothing box, wrapped in a gold ribbon and gold bow waiting on the bed as I entered mine and Yuri's room at the compound. Jesse had informed me after inviting me to be his official date for the evening, I was not allowed to wear my uniform to this party. I was not a Guardian for the night. Despite the fact that I was always his Guardian, I accepted his request. I opened it quickly, pulling out a long formal dress. The deep midnight blue color was stunning. One side of the dress cut seamlessly up to my hip. It was exactly the kind of dress I would pick for myself.

I took a few more spare minutes to check into some last minute tasks in the Guardian office of the house, leaving just enough time to shower, slip into my new dress, and style my hair. I kept my makeup to a minimum as usual, giving a final look at myself in one of the mirrors before returning to the foyer. I armed myself as best as I could in such a slim dress. Jesse was ready before me for a change, waiting somewhat patiently at the bottom of the expanding staircase. Yuri took my hand as I descended the last step, twirling me around to get a look at the dress our Moroi had chosen.

Sophie was more than pleased. "I knew it." She squealed. "I knew that dress would look great on you."

I smiled sweetly back at her. "You didn't have to do this." I reminded her and Jesse of my disinterest in their purchasing gifts for me.

"Yes we did." Sophie argued. "You are willing to take my place tonight, and I am grateful. I get a night with my kids before they go back to school. The dress is the least we can do."

She and Jesse were sincere about the gesture, and in complete agreement. I couldn't argue. Jesse kissed his wife as I said good night to Yuri. He and Sophie had their own plans to see a movie with Jaden and Ivy, before stopping in to see Dimitri. My Guardian half-brother would be elated to see his god daughter. The man was clearly destined to be a father at some point, in some way.

Jesse and I left the house together, finally able to talk privately about the trouble he felt earlier in the day. He helped me with my dress as I attempted to climb into the driver's side of my SUV, considerately closing the door before climbing into the opposite side himself. Once in, we started our drive to the Conta residence. When Jesse and Sophie first asked me to attend this party as a stand-in, I declined the offer at once. Camille Conta and I had never truly been friendly with one another, and after my return to St. Vladimir's, I was certain she would attempt to royally sabotage me or Jesse at some point. I had not told Jesse why Camille disliked me so much, but he also made a point not to ask.

"You do look great." I heard Jesse say as I drove down a dimly lit path, trying not to concentrate too hard on the night ahead. "I didn't say it back at the house, but you should know."

"Thank you, Jesse." I accepted. "You look great too."

The Conta house finally came into view as we broke through the dark paths. I'd never been to this place, and never had any specific reason to, so as I pulled the car to a stop in the circular driveway, allowing valets to do their job, I admired the current atmosphere. We were expected to show proof of our invitation to the soiree before being admitted to one of three receiving rooms. Jesse gave our invitation to a man standing guard at the front doors. Once in the receiving room, we were expected to wait. We would be announced to the other guests at the party in due time. It was a different feeling being on this side of things. Usually, my duty as a Guardian would have me already standing in position inside of the party. I would not be expected to sit, smile, and provide polite conversation with other guests as a Guardian.

It didn't take too long for Jesse to be announced with his date. He took hold of my hand as we exited the first receiving room, appearing at the door of the ballroom. Jesse was surrounded by aristocrats and Court politicians nearly as soon as we walked through the open doors, and as his date for the night, it was my job not only to be his Guardian, but to provide him with appropriate gestures, conversation, and an escape if necessary. His emotions were pretty settled as he worked the room, keeping hold of my hand much of the time. He was in conversation with one of the many dignitaries visiting Court, his attention distracted when I felt a tap on my own shoulder. Larisa Drozdov stood a foot from my left side. She look as elegant as ever, offering me a glass of champagne. I refused, passing it off to Jesse, our eyes subtly meeting. He was in deep conversation with one of the many Ivashkov royals. Jesse gave a slight nod to me as he spotted Larisa next to me. I let his hand drop from mine, whisked a few feet away as soon as I did.

"I was hoping that I might see you this evening." Larisa started. She had an agenda when it came to me, and I was not oblivious to her game. "Although, I admit I did not think to see you dressed so…"

My attire had thrown her at first. "I am standing in for Sophie Zeklos." I informed the woman, my Guardian posture returning to my muscles as I moved further away from Jesse. " She has a prior engagement, so Jesse asked me to fill in as his date for the party."

"It is kind of you to step in." Larisa was being far too sweet and engaging for my taste. , but I smiled. "I am pleased that I have an opportunity to speak to you Bellamy." Larisa was finally getting to her point. She wanted something. "I would like to know if you have time to take a short meeting with me and Lucca soon. A private meeting." She added.

Lucca and Larisa Drozdov wanted a private meeting with me? There was only one reason for that. I remained uninterested in their offers, but it would be bad manners to refuse meeting with any royal. I accepted.

"I'm sure I can find time to meet with you soon Larisa. I will call tomorrow to set something up."

She smiled, pleased that I had accepted to meet with her and her husband. A few more minutes of polite conversation, and she was off to find others to speak to. I wanted to find my way back to Jesse, but I dared not interrupt the conversation he was now trapped in. Howard Zeklos had now joined into the conversation Jesse was having with the Ivashkov gentleman. His emotions were nothing to worry about. His stress level was rising, but nothing I needed to save him from. I took a few minutes to admire the architecture and décor in the room. The Conta residence was smaller than the Zeklos compound, so this ballroom did not fit as many people. I looked around, continuing to keep my guard up as I did in these situations. Guardians dotted the outer walls of the room, closely guarding their Moroi and others during the festivities. I spotted Shane standing in a far off corner, his eyes trained to the center of the ballroom floor. I walked over, dodging Moroi and servers. His arm instinctively slid around my waist as I reached him.

"Where has you Moroi disappeared to?"

Shane indicated to the center of the room, pointing out Aaron. Aaron was currently standing face-to-face with none other than Camille Conta herself. The two were clearly having an intense angry discussion.

"When did he start talking to Camille again?"

Shane made a face. "She caught him on his way inside, insisting he speak to her."

"And you immediately but respectfully made any excuse to get away as they talked."

Shane gave a nod of confirmation and we laughed quietly, watching Camille struggle not to yell in public as she continued to plead her case to Aaron. I had forgotten all about my attire until Shane eyed me.

"New job?" He grinned coyly.

"Sophie is with the kids tonight."

"After all these years, you finally agreed to a date with Jesse Zeklos." Shane joked with a small laugh.

I ignored his laughable remarks. "Are you going to step in and rescue Aaron at any point?" I saw Camille really starting to lay into the other Moroi.

"If he needs me to." Shane was not willing to get in the middle of any of the current issues between Aaron and Camille, and frankly I did not blame him.

"He broke up with Mia earlier today." Shane casually revealed.

"Again? What was the reason this time?"

Shane was not willing to say, but after he'd heard about Switzerland, I was sure he had his own guesses. We were quiet as we stood together, happy to watch Moroi dance by us and through the room. I had my eyes on Jesse for a while, until he was able to sneak up behind me. Aaron managed to escape Camille long enough to return to Shane.

"Bellamy," Aaron's voice caught in his throat, "you look…you look…"

"Pick your jaw up off the floor, and put your tongue back in your mouth." Jesse warned, half in jest half serious.

"Your beauty never ceases to amaze me Bells." Aaron finished, frowning at Jesse.

I appreciated the compliment as always, even if Jesse didn't.

"Let's dance, Bells." Jesse offered, placing himself between me and Aaron.

I concentrated on the music flowing melodically through the room. It was a Viennese waltz.

"I don't know that you can keep up." I teased him.

His hand reached out, again proposing a dance. "Try me."

Another moment, and we were spinning around the dance floor in frame, our feet moving speedily in sync. I saw heads turn, and eyes follow us, as Jesse and I danced fast, pressed together as we kept up with the tempo.

"I wasn't aware you knew how to waltz, let alone Viennese waltz." Jesse was discernibly impressed by my dance skills.

"I can do a lot of things you are still not aware of."

He was smiling now, and I could sense the contented reaction in his emotions.

"After all this time, you found a way of surprising me."

I smiled back at him, relaxing for the first time since we'd arrived.

"What was the conversation with your father about?" I used the moment to change the subject, and I saw Jesse scowl faintly. Earlier in the night, I'd seen his father insert himself into what I assumed was a strained political conversation between Jesse and another member of the royal Court. Jesse was never happy to have his toes stepped on, professionally speaking.

"Howard is a ranking member of the Queen's royal Council." I reminded him of his family's standing, and of his father's position at Court. "Your father's opinions and his influence reach far."

"He undermined my attempt to smooth over relations between Jared Ivashkov and Vasilii Voda. He doesn't think I'm capable of doing my job correctly."

"Of course he thinks you are capable Jess." I reassured Jesse, his satisfaction now turning to open indignation. "Things are just a little more tenuous at Court between Council members and the aristocracy. Everything is strained. I'm sure Howard did not mean to step on your toes Jesse. Many of the Ivashkov's are in disagreement with the orders to overturn protocol, and return a Dhampir who willingly turned to Court. The Ozera's aren't too happy about it either."

Court and societal rules were very clear. Turning Strigoi, and being turned were two completely separate decisions. Willing and Unwilling were two separate facts that dictated different protocols and punishments by our laws. Mason being returned was a disregard for those laws.

"There has been a lot of hostility behind the scenes between the Ivashkov's, the Voda's, and even the Ozera's." I informed my politically savvy Moroi. "Your dad is only doing what he can to keep the peace." I was defending Jesse's father and the job being done to settle the building acrimony over the decision made to send Guardians after Mason.

"So am I." Jesse said. "And how do you know about the fighting?"

Jesse and I had held off from talking about Court politics for the last several weeks now. More accurately, we had ignored the problems. We hadn't taken the chance to stop to talk about any of it. We talked about everything else. My head really was not in it, so revisiting the subject was not an option. It would only make things harder.

I gave a small shrug as best as I could while we danced. "Between the Guardian Council orders, demands of your dad and members of the royal Council, I know more than I'd like." We both went quiet, and I suddenly felt the need to share more information with Jesse. "I have been called by members of the royal Council, to testify and speak at Mason's trial."

Jesse's upper body went rigid. "There is a set date? When? Do they want you to tell them about capturing Mason? Can I be there with you?" He had more questions than I was anticipating, some of which I had no answers for.

"The trial starts the night after next. I'm sure I will be criticized and interrogated about Vienna, as well as other moments between me and Mason. I'll also be cross-examined by the attorney Mason chose. Raoul Charles." I said the name, and immediately Jesse was ready to know more about the man.

"Can we take a walk?" Jesse whispered as the hypnotic sound of the music faded into the room, voices filling the empty space. "It's getting stuffy in here babe." This was code between me and Jesse. It meant one or both of us needed an escape.

I nodded to him, and he was pulling me through the crowd to the nearest exit. We made it from the ballroom dance floor to the outdoor terrace in a matter of seconds. It was a record for both of us. The temperature had dipped more than a few degrees. The air was crisp, on the verge of unbearably cold. Without a thought, Jesse took his jacket off, placing it around my bare shoulders.

"Thank you." I said to him, looking at the property lit up for the night.

The Conta lands covered less acreage than other royal properties, but it was still vast, some of the area taking my breath away. I stood , watching a few lights dance their way across the grounds, my head turning to Jesse as he stood at my side. He was apprehensive about something specific.

"Something wrong?" I asked, knowing the answer.

He took my hand again. "Come on." He insisted, leading me to a small set of stone steps. "There is something that I want to show you."

Again, I had never visited the Conta house until tonight, so whatever Jesse wished to show me would be new to me. I was game. I was not up however, to a full hike in the middle of the night. We were still walking at a fast clip exactly eight minutes after leaving the terrace, and the safety of the party.

"Where are we going, Jess?" I asked my Moroi as we continued our trek. "It's not exactly easy to walk a mile in these shoes." I pointed out the heels I was wearing at his request.

Jesse didn't answer me, I also refrained from telling him that we were being followed to this far away spot he was taking me to. My first instinct said that we were not being stalked by Strigoi. That did not mean we were not in danger. My free hand went to my upper thigh where I had a stake.

"Jesse, let's not go any farther."

"It's just up ahead." He was pleading. "You'll love it. I promise.'

I relented, my guard up higher though. A short time and walk later, we finally stopped, standing at the edge of a cliff. The clouds still shined through the dark, illuminating the tops of a forest below. I stood at the edge of the cliff, feeling my life swirling into the void in front of me.. I took a deep breath, and the air was clean.

"It reminds me of that mountain we hiked in Scotland last year." Jesse reminded me of the short weekend we had taken with our significant others. It had been a relaxing short time away from any troubles. As lovely as the view was, my concentration began to wane. He was still keeping something from me.

"Why are we here?"

"At the party?" He knew what I was referring to.

"Here as in out here. Why did you bring me all the way out here?"

"I thought you might enjoy the scenery."

"And?" I knew something more was up. The way he had looked at me earlier in the evening was still weighing on me. "Out with it Jess."

"How was your day?" He asked me.

His question completely threw me for a moment. "What?"

"Your day." Jesse repeated. "How was it?"

"Fine." I didn't mask my confusion. "Busy. What does my day have to do with…"

"What did you do all day?"

"Jesse," I used my most humorless tone, stopping the useless attempt he made to avoid my inquiries.

"Bells, do you really think I would ask you these questions right now without a purpose? Humor me."

I considered what he said, and played along. "My day was packed today. I went to multiple Guardian administration buildings trying to locate a single file, I met Dimitri at the firing range to have a chat," I did not give details on why I needed to chat with Dimitri, and again Jesse did not ask, "then I met up with Shane Reyes."

"You didn't see anyone else today?"

"What is this question and answer session about?"

He urged me to answer this last question.

"I…"I hesitated, feeling the same feeling creep in. "I saw Mason.'

Jesse looked as if he had known I had run into Mason earlier.

"I figured it was him.' He said. "You saw him around noon, or just after, right?"

"Yes." I confirmed the approximate time.

"You asked how I slept," Jesse was starting to further explain his odd way of prying into my day. "The truth is, you woke me out of a dead sleep around twelve this afternoon. I tossed and turned for hours. I was worried, and terrified."

"I woke you?" I was lost once again.

"Your emotions woke me." Jesse went silent for a few seconds, catching his breath before continuing. "Bells, the emotions you felt today, I have never experienced anything like that from you."

I now felt like I'd had the wind knocked out of me, exhaling. Everything that I was feeling when Mason stopped to demean and accost me, Jesse had experienced through me. It slipped my mind that I should mask my emotions.

"I am sorry Jess." I apologized.

"I have never felt fear in you. Not on that level." He told me what he felt. "You were terrified to your core today Bells."

He was right. Facing Mason was starting to rattle me more and more. The more I learned and heard from Mason was stating to twist me up more and more.

"There was one other emotion," Jesse went on, "that quite frankly, scared the hell out of me." Out of the blue, Jesse moved in closer to me, his arms circling me, "You didn't fail, Bellamy.'

I tossed his arms off of me, taking two steps away. "What do you mean?"

He was a roller coaster of emotions.

"The emotion I felt in you, it was failure." He drew attention to what he had experienced. "It took me hours to place that one. You've never felt that. You've never failed at anything Bells."

"I've failed at plenty of things, and you don't know what you're talking about." I denied.

"I think I do." Jesse was smart, and he knew me so well thanks in part to our emotional bond. I was ready to come back with a defensive argument, so engrossed in our words, I missed the sound of approaching footsteps.

"It continues to baffle me that you two have never had a relationship. You are fighting like an old married couple. Really Jesse, I find it hard to believe you haven't shagged her, considering how passionately you…" Camille had been chasing behind us, keeping to the shadows up until now.

Jesse didn't speak but I could feel his temper rising.

"I have to assume that you got what you wanted from her at some point too."

He despised the idea of anyone even suggesting that he and I may have at any time in our relationship been intimate. It was hurtful to Sophie. I had to agree. It was also hurtful to Yuri.

"You're spying on us." I stepped in, allowing Jesse to simmer down. "You've been following us."

"I haven't."

I tilted my head, smirking over at Jesse. "I am a Guardian, and I am very good at my job Camille. I sensed you long before we made it here, so what do you want?"

"Aaron won't talk to me. He won't even listen to me." The woman complained to the wrong two people.

"Can you blame him?" Jesse spoke under his breath.

"He won't talk to me because of you." She blamed me for the mess she had made.

"I am hardly the cause for the problems between you and Aaron."

"You have him under some sort of spell."

"Don't be daft." I blew off her accusation. "What Aaron does with his life, is his decision. If he is still upset with you, that is your own fault."

"If you hadn't poisoned him against me, he would…" She paused, and I was tired of hearing her talk. "Maybe I shouldn't be surprised that you and Jesse get along so well too." She was preparing to insinuate more about mine and Jesse's relationship.

"Be careful what you say." Jesse stopped her, his tone more of a threat than a warning. This was a tone I rarely heard from Jesse. "Bellamy is my Guardian, and one of my closest friends."

"I know exactly what she is to you." She continued to push him. There was nothing more I could do for her. Jesse was in attack mode.

"Failing to show her respect is failing to show me respect.' His low tone was not letting up. "I am the international royal liaison to the Queen and Council." He reminded. "Losing favor with me can be detrimental to a person's Court standing." He didn't need my help. He had his own leverage. "Losing Bellamy's support can easily risk any support you or your family may gain with me."

Questioning or threatening the Conta Court standing would bring Camille to her knees. Jesse took my hand, bringing me closer to him.

"Of course," Jesse offered, "I would be happy to run back inside and explain to Carlo and Marianna Conta why I will no longer entertain meetings with them."

Without another word, Camille apologized to Jesse, sending me a fleeting look. It was the best I would get from her at this point. She turned, leaving me and Jesse to continue our discussion, but I didn't want to finish our discussion here.

"If you insist on not returning to that party, can we make an excuse and leave?" I suggested to him. "I don't want to talk outside in the cold."

He agreed with me, reminding me that we would revisit our conversation later. I waved a hand in response, neither agreeing nor disagreeing with him. An hour later, we'd said goodnight to any necessary persons, and were exiting the Conta house. We waited together for my car to be brought back to us, but we said nothing. The drive back home started out relatively silent too. My phone played an upbeat song by Queen that usually would've put me in a good mood.

"Turn here." I heard Jesse say out of nowhere.

"What? Where?"

"Right turn coming up."

"Why?"

His out of the blue change in direction was not going to take us back to his house, and there was no short cut coming up. I had already learned all of the short cuts from house to house.

"Turn!" Jesse insisted.

I jerked the wheel to the right before missing the turn down a dirt road.

"Where are we going?" I demanded to know.

"Just keep driving."

I did as he said, continuing to drive down the dirt road that had no street light, following the directions given.

"Take another right, and then a left." Jesse finished.

I followed the roads, coming to a stop on a back road in the middle of nothing and nowhere.

"Why are we here Jesse?" I demanded

"I want to talk."

"Well, this is not the place for us to talk."

"This is not the place, back at the party was not the place to talk." He was challenging me.

"Guardians and their Moroi do not drive to deserted areas like this to ' _talk_ '." I returned. "This is how rumors get started. People like Camille Conta will get the wrong idea."

With that said, Jesse took off his seatbelt, hopping out of the car. He walked to the front of my SUV, climbing up onto the hood.

"You might as well come join me." He yelled over the engine, so I did. I kept the car running low, keeping the headlights on, and securing my weapons as I exited the driver's side. I sat beside him, my hands nervously clasping and wringing.

"I didn't mean to upset you back at the party." He sounded apologetic. "I wasn't trying to pick a fight with you, or…"

"I know."

"It really freaked me out when you felt all of those emotions about him today." Jesse was careful not to use the words 'failure' or 'Mason', and I understood why.

"You don't need to apologize." I said, unable to look at him as I spoke. "You were right. Any time I am around Mason, I feel like I failed. It was so long ago, and I still feel it."

"Why?" Jesse was as close as he could get to me. "What he did was not your fault Bellamy." Jesse sounded so sure of his statement.

"I know that he made his choices."

"You're afraid of him." He then proceeded to reveal more of my emotions, but he was not entirely accurate about this one.

"I'm not afraid of Mason as a person. I'm afraid of what he is capable of doing. I'm afraid we captured him too easily." I let the words slip out, wondering if I was making a mistake by bringing the issue up.

"You think he has some ulterior motive for being caught?" I couldn't quite gauge Jesse's words. Was he considering what I said, or did he think I was crazy to think it? I didn't answer, so he changed the subject.

"About what Camille said, about you and Aaron…"

I hated keeping secrets from Jesse. They weren't necessary, but I also knew how he might react if he suspected anything between me and Aaron, even in the past.

"Camille has had a lot to say about you and Aaron. She claims to have proof that the two of you were caught together back at St. Vlad's." His eyes turned to the ground. "I know it was a long time ago, but…"

"Jesse, you saw where my head was when I returned to the Academy. I was in no place to be in someone else's bed. I had a hard enough time getting over Christian. The last thing I wanted was a random Moroi hookup. Besides, do you want to tell me that Aaron was thinking about me back then? He was going through his own trauma. I tried helping him through that."

"True." Jesse agreed. "But you would tell me if you…"

"If I shagged your best friend? I like to think that Aaron would tell you too."

"Yeah," Jesse chuckled, "he would be the first to tell me. He was pretty into you before you left."

"Don't be ridiculous." I laughed the idea off. "Aaron Drozdov has never been 'into me'. He was with Mia, and then Camille.'

Jesse wrapped his arms around me, holding me close again. "You would be surprised, Bells."

I leaned in against him, closing my eyes for a few seconds, escaping the emotions of the last eighteen hours. "Can we stay like this forever?"

Jesse hummed. "As much as I would enjoy that too," Yuri might want to trade places with me at some point."

I chuckled at his answer.

"And I like your husband too damn much to take you from him."

"I feel the same about your wife."

Jesse kissed the top of my head, both of us completely relaxed for the first time in weeks.

"What do you think I should do?" I asked, and Jesse tightened his arms around me, feeling my fear rise again.

"I think that you should face your demons." Jesse said to me. "Very few people get the chance to have someone come back from the dead. When it happens, I think it gives the living the opportunity to really say what they feel."

I twisted my head to look at him. "You've certainly changed your tune."

"I've had a chance to see and feel you going through this. I say deal with Mason, let him go, and then we can finally leave Court."

"So that's your game." I played. "You just want to go home." I could feel the smirk on his face. "Me too sweetheart."

Another thirty minutes of silence, Jesse and I were recharged and ready to return home. I pulled the car into the driveway, shutting off the engine at three-thirty. We walked inside, both disappearing to change before I located Yuri and Sophie watching a movie together. I took Yuri's hand, pulled onto his lap, as he kissed my neck.

"I missed you tonight." Yuri mumbled into my neck. "How was the party?"

"Eventful." Jesse answered, appearing behind Sophie.

"Mia stopped by a few minutes ago." I was told. "She looked kind of upset."

I gave a nod. "Shane mentioned that she and Aaron broke up earlier."

"Again?" Both Yuri and Sophie said.

"I should go see her before the sun comes up." I attempted to stand, to no avail. "I promise to be back soon."

"Ten minutes?"

"Probably not that soon."

Yuri reluctantly released my waist and neck. I left the house again, wondering if I should tell Yuri about my talk with Jesse. On occasion, I know it bothered Yuri when Jesse was more in tune with my emotions, and when he could get to the bottom of my problems faster and easier than Yuri. I wondered if I should bring up Mason, and what his return was really doing to me. Then I wondered if I should bring up my real suspicions. The sun was another two hours away from rising when I reached Mia's place. The lights were still on, so I knocked.

"This must be a social visit." Mia said as she opened the door, looking up and down at my attire. I could hear the antipathy dripping off of her words. Her body language spoke volumes. She was cross. Usually she was thrilled to see me before sunrise, but the look she gave me now, would've sent a less courageous person into hiding.

"Sophie said you stopped by to see me."

Mia crossed her arms, guarding herself. "You weren't there."

"I was attending the Conta party with Jesse."

"With Jesse?" She laughed. "You attended _that_ party with Jesse?" Was it so hard to believe? I was his Guardian. Helping Jesse was my job, and that role meant playing a part sometimes.

"I talked to Shane earlier. He said that you and Aaron split up again. What happened?"

"You tell me." She stated. Clearly I was to blame for her problems with Aaron too.

"What does that mean, and why are you acting so tetchy? What is it you think I've done?"

The tone of our conversation changed again as her eyes swept up to meet mine. I could see all of the sadness, the uncertainty, and the disbelief exuding from her.

"He has feelings for you." Mia stated very firmly.

"Who?" I kind of figured who the 'who' in this conversation might be, but didn't want to assume.

"Do you two still sneak off together, and…"

"Whoa!" I held my hands up, palms facing the other woman, trying not to shout at the accusation being made. "I hope you are talking about Yuri, because my husband is the only man I sneak off with these days." I took in another deep breath. "I'm going to need a few more details. Whom are we talking about?"

"Aaron." She spoke as though I should've known the answer,.

I rolled my eyes. "Not this again."

"Camille said that…"

"Stop." I held up a hand again, bringing this particular topic to a screaming halt. "Camille is behind this. I should've guessed." I had no doubt that after I blew off her accusations, and Jesse berated her for insulting me, Camille had likely gone to her so called friend, spreading the same rumor to the one person who was upset enough at Aaron to believe. I had to say something.

"She said that she saw you and Aaron together at the Academy. You were all over each other."

"That is a ridiculous rumor, started because Camille is angry that Aaron is still angry with her."

"Mia wiped at her eyes., spreading the trail of tears to the side of her face. "Why is he upset with Camille?"

"You know those two." I offered. "She is always trying to push his buttons."

"Do you think he wants to be with her now?" Her disdain was twisting into suspicion more than curiosity.

"No. If the two of you broke up, it is not because Aaron wants to be with someone else."

"Even you?" Her tears were about ready to start falling again.

"I'm married."

"That doesn't mean he can't have feelings for you."

"He doesn't have feelings for me." I was eighty-five percent sure my statement was true.

"Then why did he break up with me?" She was crying, and I was sure this would not be the last time this evening or the next that her tears would fall. She wanted answers that I did not have.

"I don't know. What did he say to you?" I had gone from defensive to comforting.

Mia finally let me inside her apartment, doing her best not to completely fall apart in front of me over Aaron. "He said things aren't the same between us."

"Things rarely stay the same in any relationship." I responded, sitting with her, hoping to alleviate some of her worry.

"Exactly." She felt the same. "You and Yuri have managed to stay together. How?" She asked. "How do you manage it?"

"Flirting." I wasn't entirely joking. "He still flirts across the room with me, and I do with him."

"There must be another reason; some reason Aaron doesn't want to say."

Again, I had my suspicions, but I didn't want Mia anymore upset than she already was.

"His mother." She surmised aloud. Her crying temporarily let up as she searched for a new reason.

"What about her?"

"She doesn't like me. She doesn't approve."

"Larisa Drozdov doesn't like a lot of people." It was a fair statement. Over the years, I had learned that Aaron's parents had collectively approved of one Moroi he'd been in a relationship with, and Vasilisa Dragomir was now Queen, and practically engaged to Christian.

I left my friend an hour later with as many questions as she'd started with.

When I returned to the compound, the sun was just peeking over the horizon. The house was quiet upon entering, despite all of the roaming Guardians. Jesse and Sophie were already tucked away in their room after putting the kids to sleep for the day, but I shouldn't have been surprised to see Yuri still up. He was waiting for my return, and clearly wanted to have a chat wit his wife. I entered our bedroom across the hall from Jesse and Sophie's room, to find him sitting at the edge of our bed. I suddenly thought back to what Jesse had mentioned earlier in the evening. He wanted me to face my demons. He wanted me to face Mason, to say the words I'd been too afraid to say yet. I pulled off my jacket and threw it onto a chair near the bed.

"Jesse said that you two had a short confrontation with Camille Conta." Yuri spoke before I could.

"Aaron is still upset with her, and she still blames me for his hostility." Yuri knew what all of this meant. He knew the story behind the story.

"You should get ahead of this problem before it takes root here at Court." He smartly advised.

"I know."

"What will you do?"

"I don't know." I let him pull me back onto his lap, his arms circling around my mid-section. "I should talk to Shane soon." I closed my eyes, enjoying the feel of Yuri's breathing as he nestled his face into my neck, humming in response to the things I said. "Earlier tonight, Jesse gave me some advice. He thinks that I should face Mason once and for all about the real issues between us."

"Jesse said that?"

"He surprised me too." I gave a short laugh, hesitating to ask my next question, but I knew that if if anyone, Yuri would have firsthand knowledge in this area. "Yuri, how did you deal with your monsters?" I started. "How did you finally face your demons?"

"Illya and Katja." He guessed pretty quickly where I was headed with my questions. Like me, Yuri had lost the one he loved. He thought Katja dead, just as I thought Mason was dead. We had both been fooled by past loves who had now come back from the dead. Yuri shook his head, removing me from his lap as he stood, walking a few feet away.

"I didn't." His eyes lowered to the floor. "I didn't confront my demons. I was not brave enough to ask the questions I needed to ask." He twisted back around to me. "But you are. Jesse is right." Words I never expected to escape Yuri's lips. "You have the chance to put all of this behind you if you choose. You have the chance to ask questions I wasn't brave enough to hear the answers to."

"If I choose.' I repeated his words. "If I am brave enough."

Yuri bent down and kissed me sweetly. "You should get some sleep. The next few days are going to get rougher. This trial will take most of your energy and concentration."

I really didn't want to sleep, but Yuri was right. I would need more energy and focus. I found my eyes closing not long after my head hit the pillows. My body was telling me I was more tired than I wanted to admit. Through the darkness of sleep, my body succumbed to the dream state taking over. A figure was emerging in the same twilight, taking shape, and moving closer. The outline of the shape soon became a person. I recognized him immediately. Mason.

One into full view, I saw that he was smiling. This was no jovial smile. The look on his face unnerved me. His eyes held violence and a wickedness to them. I had seen this look before in others. The more distance he closed between us, the more detail I could establish and see. His blue shirt was stained in red. The color was a shade. It was a shade I knew all too well. Blood. There were dots and streaks of it on his cheeks as well. My stomach started to twist, and my chest tightened. I could feel a scream rising up in my chest. Mason was holding something in each hand. It all started to connect . The look in his eyes, the blood splattered on him. Light touched his hands, and my scream finally escaped. He was holding two severed heads in his hands. The faces were easily recognized. My eyes were fixated on the horrific dead faces of Jesse and Christian.

Seconds later, I could hear the fist of my Moroi banging on my bedroom doors. His emotions were frantic, panicked, and twisted in some of the worst ways I'd ever felt. I could hear Jesse shouting, but my whole system, mind and body, was paralyzed by my own fear. Was it possible? Could Mason hurt Jesse? Would he kill him? And Christian….

My eyes sluggishly opened, my shoulders shaking. I realized that Jesse was shaking me. He was practically sitting on my chest, desperately trying to get my attention. My vision took longer to focus on my Moroi. I felt myself break down into sobbing tears the instant I recognized his face, his features full of worry, but alive. Both Yuri and Dimitri were standing with him, each equally as worried.

"What the hell were you dreaming about?" Jesse pulled me up against him, my arms holding him in return. Jesse held me close, his breathing ragged and shaky. I couldn't keep him close enough to feel safe.

"Something isn't right." I shook my head against his chest, knowing that my dream was not an arbitrary as it seemed. "Something is very wrong." It was more.

"Wrong with you?"

"No. Wrong with Mason." All three men looked confused that I might still concern myself with Mason's well-being. "None of this makes sense." I attempted to explain my not so new gut feeling. "There are pieces that don't fit this puzzle."

"Like what?" Jesse curiously questioned, eventually letting me go as I stood from my bed.

"Why?" I questioned in return. "Why would he come back now? There has to be a reason. He has been able to hide all these years without detection from the Guardian Council. What changed?" I was throwing my clothes back on as I spoke.

"Coincidence." Dimitri took a shot, but I heard Jesse scoff.

"We all know that Bellamy doesn't believe in coincidence. And after all these years of working with her, neither do I. She is asking questions that should've been asked long before the Councils put her on a [plane to go after him."

The four of us spoke for a while longer, but I was not getting as far in my argument as I wanted. The nightmare I had never would've set me on edge or further raised my suspicions, but for the fact that I was not the only apprehensive person when it came to trusting the motives of Mason Ashford. I was wide awake and fully dressed once again before noon, unwilling to let myself fall back to sleep. I could keep going. I needed to keep going, and I needed to get to the bottom of what I felt. First however, I needed to speak to Shane. I asked my friend to meet me somewhere less conspicuous. If I was going to finally divulge secrets about St. Vladimir's, I hoped for as little distraction as possible. Shane arrived at the park I chose minutes after me, skeptical of my location choice.

"Aaron is still asleep." He said, and I knew why he made his point to mention it.

"I know. I want to talk to you alone. You and I both know that there are two sides to any story. Aaron can tell you his side when he chooses, but I want you to know why I did the things I did at the Academy."

Shane sat down beside me, sharing the small blanket I laid out. We would be here awhile.


	11. PART 11: A PLAN TO GO CRAZY

**_AUTHOR'S NOTE: IT'S BEEN AWHILE SINCE I UPDATED THIS STORY. TRUTH IS, I FINALLY FIGURED OUT HOW IT WILL END. I NEEDED TO REWRITE, RESTRUCTURE, AND EDIT QUITE A BIT. NEXT CHAPTER SHOULD BE UP SOON. AS ALWAYS, HAPPY READING._**

 **PART 11:** **A PLAN TO GO CRAZY**

 _"_ _Let me get this straight." I voiced with an edge of sardonic disbelief. "You want me to spy for you and the Moroi Council."_

 _The woman on the opposite end of the phone cleared her throat. "'Spying' is such a crude word. We prefer to see this as a method of obtaining necessary evidence. I realize that I am asking a lot of you, Guardian Pearce."_

 _"_ _Did the Guardian Council put you up to this?" I took a breath in, steadying myself. I had a sinking feeling that this particular request to "spy", was an idea that came more from the Guardian Council._

 _"_ _No." The woman said. "It has recently been revealed to me that you have experience in strategic pursuit of others. You have trained as a Guardian tracker." She dumbed down my area of training._

 _"_ _Tracking is not the same as spying. I also have expert training in hostage negotiation, but it doesn't mean that I want to insert myself into a dangerous set of circumstances against people with weapons and delusional philosophies."_

 _"_ _Your aunt was a member of Bureau- Ten." Her tone took on a more straightforward sound. "The job is to simply look into behavior patterns and altered principles." It was said to me. "If we are wrong, there is no harm done. But if this suspicion turns out to be correct, and nothing is done about it…"_

 _"_ _People will get hurt." I finished._

 _The conversation went on like this for a while longer. Ultimately, I only promised to keep an eye out for suspicious behavior. I was not going to be a Guardian spy for either Council. Even sitting back and watching for anything out of the ordinary would be difficult. I was going to need help. I was going to need a lot of help. I sat down in the Monastery courtyard, watching a few tourists walk the grounds. Our group was scheduled to leave in the next few hours, but I needed time to gather my own self and my feelings before things got far more tumultuous. The call I'd just ended was not expected. I was not pleased to receive it. In fact, it made me more nervous than anything else I had experienced on this trip. It complicated so much more._

 _"_ _Everything alright Bells?" I heard Eddie Castile ask me. He stood a few feet away, still looking like he had seen a ghost the night before. He had. We both had. Neither of us could hide the fact that we had not slept since our fight with Mason._

 _I pursed my lips to a thin line. "Is anything ever alright when royals get involved in Guardian matters? Can anything ever be alright when they approach you by way of the Guardian Council?"_

 _"_ _What?" Eddie looked as befuddled as I was feeling. He sat down beside me, placing an arm around me for comfort. I wasn't sure if it was meant for his comfort or mine. "What does that mean? What is really going on?"_

 _I didn't want to hide this from Eddie. I couldn't. "I just got a call from Lola Ivashkov." I swore Eddie to secrecy over what I was about to say._

 _"_ _Ed, I'm going to go crazy."_

 ** _DIMITRI_**

 ** _VIENNA_**

 _I could not put my finger on the puzzle, but something was off. The way he spoke was different. The look in his eyes had changed. I wouldn't, I couldn't say anything to Bellamy or anyone else until I was sure of the problem. But, how could I be sure? And then how would I approach others? Would they think that I was crazy for thinking these things? During my first real talk with Mason since his 'return', I continued to chastise myself for the doubts I was in my head. I had not slept in nearly forty-eight hours, and I was existing solely on adrenaline. I ran my fingers through my hair, pulling out the black band, retying it several times as I argued with myself in silence._

 _"_ _When are we leaving Vienna? When are you taking me back?" These were two of the first questions that Mason Ashford asked me. His abrupt interest in our return to Court caught me off guard. Normally, I would not give it a second thought, but this feeling was gnawing at me. He had been gone for so long, unable to go home, or be with the people he once knew so well. I thought maybe he would be more concerned about contacting or seeing his family. Those had been some of my first thoughts. After my recovery, resolidifying relationships with my family, my friends, and my colleagues had been my primary concerns. Perhaps Mason just needed time. Still, I could not ignore the obsession he had with being at Court, being inside the walls of our most guarded sanctuary. Was he afraid of something? Someone? I tried desperately to erase the many doubts I had about Mason. What would my doubts and suspicions do to Rose if I told her? I did not hide much from my Roza, but this… She was already conflicted about Mason's reemergence, discovering that all this time he had been Strigoi. She was already dealing with more than enough confusion and conflict. I could not add more to it. Then, there was Bellamy's acrimony for Mason's decisions. She seemed to be having the hardest time with Mason's reappearance into our lives. It was cruel of the Guardian Council to ask her to retrieve the man she thought she had lost years ago._

 _"_ _Was it hard for you to return to normal hours and tasks?" I heard Mason voice from behind me. He shielded his eyes from the initial brightness of the day. I made room for him to sit._

 _"_ _It will take you time for you to readjust." I was prepared to answer his statement, to give him any personal advice I could after going through the transformations myself._

 _Mason's head turned swiftly to the side. It was as though he could sense their presence. "They are obviously not together anymore." He indicated towards Bellamy and Christian, walking hand in hand across the Monastery square, both staying in the heavily shaded areas._

 _The pair were deep enough in their own conversation that they did not notice Mason sitting slightly out of sight. He watched them with a deep interest. My hesitation to answer his inquiry was noticed. Disinclined to start trouble between the three, I was more concerned with his state of mind when it came to Christian specifically. Bellamy and I were not taking much to chance. Mason and Christian would not be left in a room together anytime soon._

 _"_ _Strigoi want him." Mason was staring directing into the sun now, and it was difficult to tell if he enjoyed the warmth again. The remark made was not something I expected to hear him say._

 _Strigoi wanting Christian Ozera was nothing new to anyone. But, for Mason to voice the fact now made me more nervous._

 _"_ _Strigoi will not get to him." I returned flatly. "Christian is protected by me. I am his Guardian. He is also guarded by Bellamy."_

 _"_ _Of course he is."_

 _"_ _Rose also looks out for Christian." I mentioned the other woman who was once such a big part of Mason's life. He changed suddenly._

 _"_ _Rose." He was contemplative of the new topic. "Where is she? Why didn't she come to Vienna?"_

 _"_ _She is with the Queen. They will return to Court in time."_

 _"_ _She knows…"_

 _"_ _She knows why we came here to Vienna. She knows everything."_

 **PRESENT DAY-COURT**

 **DIMITRI**

Rose and I arrived, catching up to Shane Reyes and Eddie Castile at the Guardian Strategy Room. We had all been called in. Yuri was waiting for our arrival outside of the doors. The call had come from him. He had not said what sort of help he needed, but had briefly mentioned that it concerned Bellamy. Christian and Lissa were fine to have a few minutes alone while we dealt with any trouble ahead, so Rose and I felt safe coming to Yuri's aide. Yuri immediately stepped in front of the doors, blocking our entrance. I knew without words that something was wrong. The look the Guardian gave me said as much.

None of us could see inside of the room yet, but I could not ignore the lack of control in Yuri's facial expression. The last time I had seen a man look like this, I was looking into a mirror. I knew this particular brand of anxiety well when Rose was troubled by ghostly apparitions of Mason Ashford.

"Before you all go inside, I need to explain something about Bells."

"What's wrong with her?" Eddie and Rose spoke in unison.

I watched Yuri's shoulders drop, and for a moment I thought he might sink down to the floor.

"The nightmares are back." He informed us. I knew exactly what this meant. "Her nightmares are back. She's been having them for the last week. She asked me not to say anything to you." He looked directly at me. "But,…"

"But they are affecting her." I added.

Bellamy suffering from nightmares would not normally concern either of us, but we were well acquainted with the results her nightmares brought. Bellamy's nightmares were an altogether different sort of trouble.

"The uh," Yuri cleared his throat, keeping a hand on the door," the big ball of weird is working overtime." He referred to the inside joke of Bellamy's brain, her thoughts, and how she sorted it all. "Since you all returned from Vienna, she has quietly been gathering intelligence. She is one-hundred percent convinced that Mason Ashford is up to something more nefarious than he is letting on."

I stepped closer to Yuri, putting my hand to his shoulder until he stepped away from the door. The five of us walked into the room where Bellamy was known to do some of her best work. Every wall was now covered by hanging white boards, and my friend had used nearly every inch of available space. Charts, graphs, theories, and facts all spread out into well-organized categories.

"Bells.' I said her name, looking over everything she wrote and considered, unable to fully understand what sort of mental or emotional break she was possibly experiencing. "Bellamy, what is all of this? What are you working on?"

"Mason." She told me, and I worried more for her. "Something is wrong."

My chest tightened at her words. "With Mason? Bells, he is being guarded at all times. Everything is…"

"Don't say fine." She turned, pointing a marker at me, warning in her tone. "Everything is not fine. And do not try to say that I am looking for trouble where there is none."

"Okay." I kept a surrendering position with her, trying to get a few paces closer. She was writing as she went through much of the information dug out in her conversations with Mason, but as I moved closer, I could see her hands were shaking too. "When was the last time you slept?"

"Yesterday." Her response was sharper than usual. "You think I'm crazy, don't you?" She had turned to face me, looking less distracted for a moment.

In a matter of seconds, I had flashbacks of Rose going through a similar breakdown after Mason died in Seattle. She too thought that she was going crazy. The woman I love had admitted to seeing ghosts, caused by the spirit link between her and Lissa at the time. I wondered about all of that now, and how it was possible for Rose to see his spirit form. Bellamy however was going through something a little different.

"I don't think you are crazy Bellamy." I calmly assured her. I was not about to lose her to the increasing mania and paranoia caused by Mason's reappearance.

"Liar."

"Really, I don't." I kept my voice soft and low. "But I don't understand. Explain some of this to me." I pointed to one of the boards. It held theories and suggestions to several questions upon it.

Bellamy eyed me charily. She then looked to the board and back to me again.

"A cover is not a book." Her statement was far more confusing. "You don't see it." She stated, but her words were more accusatory than revealing to whatever I was missing. "You don't see how easy it was. I didn't either until I started to think about it. It should've been harder. It should've taken more."

"More?" Eddie Castile carefully came to stand beside me, listening to his friend, equally as uneasy about Bellamy's state of mind. "More of what? What are we missing babe?"

"Vienna." She clarified brusquely, brushing off the sweet name Eddie often used with her. "The fight against Mason should've been harder." Her eyes darted back to the boards as she analyzed much of what she had written down. I was quietly entertained and amazed at her ability to compartmentalize every theory and thought that had come to mind, onto these white boards. She compared theories to her notes on the Vienna mission as we stood, worrying about her.

"He was captured too easily." She sounded so certain of this specific piece of information. "What if he wanted to come back?"

"Sure." Mocking in Shane's voiced caused Bellamy to glare back at her friend as he stood beside Rose.

Her glare quickly turned to a look of sadness. "Think about it. She went on explaining, and starting to make more sense to me. "Strigoi don't feel loneliness or regret. They don't "miss" the people that they leave behind."

"You're right Bellamy." I confirmed, finally able to comprehend more of her thoughts. Having once been Strigoi myself, I could confirm this theory of hers.

"Mason has been gone for a long time now. He has managed to keep to the shadows and avoid our cameras and security this entire time. Why ruin that?" Bellamy was pacing like a wild cat now, trying to come up with logical answers to her questions. "Why come out of hiding now? There has to be a good reason."

"It's coincidence."

"Nothing is coincidence." She mentioned. "Dimitri," She addressed me directly, "when you were Strigoi," she visibly apologized, knowing how difficult the subject remained for me, "what reasons did you have for returning?"

"None." We both were able to answer together. "I only came out of the shadows to hunt. Towards the end, it was just provocation for Rose."

"You were brought back to us only after Rose pulled you out of hiding. But even out of hiding, you were a bitch to take down as Strigoi. You were stronger as Strigoi than you were as Dhampir. That is saying a lot." She was reasoning through the details. "Mason came to us long before we went to Vienna to find him. He wanted to be found there in that city."

Bellamy made another logical point to her thoughts, and about the mission we took to capture Mason in Vienna.

"Nothing really worked until that last night of the mission. We hunted him as a group with no luck, we hunted individually, hoping to coax him back out, but it wasn't until Christian was brought out as bait that Mason seemed pleased to play the game."

"And you don't think that is a coincidence?" Shane continued to question Bellamy.

"Nothing Mason has done or said this entire time has been coincidence." She believed.

I thought back to our time in Vienna, ruminating about things Mason said to me. Perhaps Bellamy was on to something. Then again, perhaps she was jumping to conclusions.

"Assuming you are right," I approached Bellamy's theories, "assuming he wanted to be here at Court for a specific reason," I saw Eddie, Shane, and Rose look at me as though I were starting to lose my mind too, "what is the reason?"

"That is what I am trying to determine."

"You're not buying this, are you?" Shane voiced out loud. "Look Bellamy, I know that you are mad at Mason for leaving, for dying, and for…"

"No." She shut down her Guardian friend "Do not blame this on emotion. Don't tell me that I am doing this because of anger or guilt. Maybe I do feel those things, but that is not what this is about." She walked right up to Shane, determined to make him believe. "You have fought Strigoi in the field before this. We all know how bloody, violent, and brutal those fights are." She went on. "You know that it is harder than it was in Austria. For crying out loud, Mason was harder to spar with as a novice than he was as Strigoi."

Shane acknowledged her point. Bellamy made some strong arguments. Mason did not put up as much of a fight as he should've in Vienna. Why not? Why would he throw a fight like that, especially as a Strigoi?

"He wants something." Bellamy turned away from all of us again. "This would not be the first time that Strigoi might gain outside help to…"

"Bellamy!" Shane shouted angrily at her. "You're being ridiculous. Mason would not help Strigoi." He insisted, but I was leaning more towards Bellamy's thinking now.

"Why not?" She challenged him. "You're looking at me like I'm totally mad."

"I mean, are you? Have you talked to a professional about these delusions?" Shane was visibly upset by what he was hearing. "I'm not going to stay and listen to this." He started to leave until I spoke up.

"I don't want to believe any of this either," I mentioned, falling into one of the chairs at the center table, "but I have had my own suspicions since Vienna.

"Vienna." Bellamy half- questioned. "You didn't say anything? Why wouldn't you say anything?"

"I didn't have proof of anything." I answered her. "My doubts were my own until I could find anything worth bringing up."

Bellamy and I sat quietly talking together, mostly trying to make more sense of the thoughts and doubts in mind. Rose, Yuri, and Eddie all had their own conversations, trying to find ways of disputing our doubts.

"Do you think that the Queen and Councils would let us question Mason once more? Maybe we could find someone, a more neutral Guardian to dig in enough to find out if there is something else he wants here at Court." Bellamy suggested.

"You wouldn't want to question him again yourself?" I was curious as to why she might have another Guardian brought in to speak with Mason.

"No." She replied. "It would have to be someone else questioning him. He won't speak to me about anything at this point." She explained, letting me in on the tension between the pair. "I am the enemy in his eyes. I'm out to see that nothing is easy in his mind."

"He won't speak to anyone that he doesn't trust to stay quiet." I also pointed out to Bellamy. "Let me see what I can do." I offered to try to speak with the Queen while Bellamy took on the Councils. Before approaching the Queen, I would first need to convince Rose that there was in fact more to the picture than we were initially seeing. Proving the points would not be easy. Mason was once her friend, one of her confidants, He was also once in love with her, or so he claimed.

I left Bellamy to continue contemplating her theories, left her to the criticizing voices of Eddie and Shane, and unfortunately left Yuri to continue worrying about his wife.

 **BELLAMY**

He didn't like doing it very often, but Dimitri had used every bit of influence he had with Lissa, Rose, and Christian to get a meeting with the Queen. She agreed to hear our concerns. So, while he met with the Queen, I set my mind to approaching the Councils. The Moroi Council was split on any decision about Mason, and with the trial coming up in another day, I was not expecting much. Ultimately, they were so evenly split and arguing that the decision was left to the Queen. The Guardian Council on the other hand was willing to let their Guardians do their job. After all, if we were wrong there would be no harm done.

I had my answer from the Councils, and now found myself waiting on Dimitri. I was back to the Strategy room, going through all of the info I had from speaking to Mason. Additionally, I went through detailed transcripts of Mason's conversations with others, both Guardians and Moroi.

"You and Dimitri have one hour. Lissa will give you one chance to question Mason before his trial." Rose stood in the doorway of the room, her arms crossed, but willing to talk about the sensitive topic.

"Dimitri convinced her?"

Rose shrugged her shoulders. "For what it's worth, I don't think you are crazy. Not entirely."

"Pretty sure a lot of others will disagree with you."

"Can I ask you something?" She wanted to know.

"Anything." It was my longstanding opinion that Rose Hathaway had earned the right to ask me many questions, about many things after all of these years. She had not asked any until now.

"I want to know about you and Mason." She paused. "About Vienna." Vienna was still a bit of a touchy subject with many of us at Court, myself and Rose included.

I sat down, preparing to have a conversation about the place she really didn't want to hear about, and the place that I really did not want to talk about.

"What was it like for you?" She asked without the need to elaborate. As the words fell from her mouth, I knew precisely what she wanted to know. "When you had to face Mason like that, was it hard?"

"Was it hard for you to face Dimitri?" I turned the question back around to her. After all, Rose and I were mostly in the same boat when it came to this subject matter. The only difference between us, Rose was in love with Dimitri when she went after him.

"It was one of the worst moments of my life since becoming a Guardian." I told her. "It was one of the most heartbreaking moments, and also one of the most terrifying."

"Why?"

"Because, when I saw him standing in front of me, after thinking that he was dead, I didn't know how to… I was no longer sure about…" I heard myself hesitating, frustrated by any answer I might give her.

"You had the option to kill him." Rose factually and pointedly stated. "Why didn't you?"

This question was even worse than the last. How does one respond to something like that with any sort of grace or composure?

I had to be totally upfront with Rose. She deserved nothing less than the truth. "I wrestled with the option of death or life, whether to kill him or bring him back alive until the moment I drove that stake through him. I didn't know if I would kill him or not. I didn't know if I wanted to kill him or not."

"Do you regret your decisions?"

Was she interrogating me? I leaned back into the chair that I occupied, careful not to give too much away at once. "I regret some of my decisions, but if you are asking if I regret letting him live, that is a very complicated answer. If I say yes, I'm a bit of a monster because I am saying that I could've killed Mason, or that I wish I had. If I say no, I am still a monster because that is essentially saying that I am able to cope with his presence, and the idea that he easily lied to me, to us. The answer is I don't know." I had gone from comfortably leaning back in the chair, to a painful hunched position.

"There was a time that I thought I was losing my mind. I kept seeing Mason's ghost at St. Vladimir's, although now I'm starting to think I was imagining things."

"I rested my chin to my knuckles, listening to her, recalling the time at the Academy when Dimitri, Rose, Christian, and others returned from their short trip to the Moroi Court to testify against Victor Dashkov.

"Dimitri and I had a conversation about some of that back at the Academy." I confessed to my soon to be half-sister-in-law. "And recently, I have been giving it more thought."

"What about it?" Rose was curious to hear my opinions, crazy or not.

"I've been comparing what happened then, and what is happening now." I was starting to put more pieces together over the last several days, hours, weeks. "What you experienced during that time was not entirely impossible." I piqued her curiosity even more. "Strigoi lose their soul when turned, so Mason's soul could've easily stayed in spirit form. It sounds crazy. Insane. To think that the Mason we knew could be so willing to turn into the one thing that we despise most in this world, to think that he might be capable of worse things to come, makes me sound crazy. I hear it too. I know how mad I sound, Rose."

"But he isn't." I barely heard the words escape her. She was almost silent, her eyes full of the same despair I felt. "He isn't the same Mason we knew. What I don't understand is how he got his soul back after so much time." She had questions of her own. This was clearly something Rose had been grappling with, unable to bring it up to others who might not understand. "At St. Vladimir's, I was told that a soul taken as violently as Mason's, has a limited amount of time on this plane. When Dimitri came back to us, I saw his eyes. He was the same. He was my Dimitri."

"Dimitri and Mason are two different stories. They're two different sort of men. Dimitri was an experienced Guardian, and an adult when he was turned. Mason was a young kid, an arrogant novice who changed willingly because he did not want to face his problems.

"All of that sounds accurate enough. It makes sense, but we are missing something more." Rose glanced around at my white boards, more information added.

"Yes, but what? I don't see what it is."

Both Rose and I jumped up as the door swung back open.

"I do." Dimitri moved swiftly into the room. "I know what you are missing. It hit me when Yuri said that you are having nightmares again."

"Yuri told you?" I swallowed hard, fear bubbling in my stomach as my half-brother nodded. "He shouldn't have done that."

"Right. He should not have told me. You should've." Dimitri stopped beside me, placing a hand to my shoulder.

Quickly the two of us shared a brief moment of honesty, moving past the issue temporarily. We had bigger troubles.

"One of your theories," Dimitri waved a hand at the board behind him, "reminded me of when I was Strigoi."

I know how much you love being reminded of that time." I snarkily replied. Rose coughed, masking a small laugh.

Dimitri made a face at the two of us. "When I was Strigoi, I always carried a list. It was a list of names. Three or four royals I planned on killing."

"You never told me that." Rose was somewhat shocked by the admission. After all this time there were still things that Dimitri hid about his time as Strigoi. "How does a list help us?" But, as I searched the list of theories I had written down, I caught the significance.

"Oh." I breathed. "You also think that he might have intentionally come back. Do you think he's here to hurt specific royals? If he is going to target specific Moroi, how do we find out who he might go after?"

"We ask him." Rose confirmed. "Lissa gave you an hour."

"In the meantime," the three of us stood in the only one-hundred percent secure room at Court. There were no cameras or microphones in the strategy room, for good reason, "if Mason does have a list, history says that Christian is on it. I don't want him out of your sight until we figure out what is going on."

"Agreed." Both Dimitri and Rose stated.

 **EDDIE**

What was I thinking? What was I about to do? Had I really been convinced to sit down and talk to Mason again? Was I really and truly about to walk into Bellamy's favorite Court coffee shop, sit down, and have a civil conversation with Mason? Yes. I rounded the final corner to see him already sitting inside, Guardians to each side of the table. I took a deep breath before entering, waving off the Guardians who stayed only a few more feet back.

"What are you doing here?" Mason questioned my arrival as soon as I started towards him. "What do you want?" It was entertaining to see that the man was still afraid of Bellamy in some way. He had good reason to fear her.

"Bellamy isn't coming." I informed the man, sitting across from him. He looked nervous. "She is stuck talking to Dimitri. He says that she is obsessed with finding you guilty of something. She is manic and overwhelmed by the thought that you are up to something." I had two cups of coffee brought over to the table.

"What is small, blonde, and crazy accusing me of this time?"

I was trying to keep my temper in check, just as I'd been instructed to do. The idea that he could now see Bellamy as an enemy was baffling. "Between you and me, she thinks that she made a mistake in going to Vienna. She has been talking to Guardian Belikov these last two days, questioning him about being Strigoi."

Mason hummed in a disrespectful manner, and I was not sure where his contempt stemmed from. Had he fought with Dimitri? Had one of them shared a negative or unfriendly opinion? It didn't sound like something Dimitri would do, but Mason…that was possible. I went on with the outline I was instructed to stick to, keeping to the script. I would get answers soon enough.

"Dimitri told her that when he was Strigoi, he carried a small list with him."

He looked nervous again, and I saw him shift uncomfortably.

"Do all Strigoi have a list that they go by? Did you have one?"

"I did." Mason admitted to me, his eyes growing wide with suspicion and alarm. "What is going on? Why did I just tell you that?" True, it was not something he would admit freely, even under the best of circumstances. Strigoi secrets were never just handed over to Guardians, so we had other ways of obtaining our information.

"Who was on your list?" I continued.

"A few Moroi."

That was too vague. I needed more information. "Royals? Was Christian on your list?"

"Christian Ozera is on every list. Strigoi want him turned." He stood, growing angrier now. "What the hell?!"

"Truth serum." I kept cool, staying seated. "Sit down." I ordered, watching the Guardians in charge of Mason all attempt to move. Mason sat, looking at his cup of coffee. I smirked.

"Why are you doing this?"

"Bellamy might be right, and on the off chance that she is, I am keeping Moroi safe." I was keeping Jill safe. Another coup at Court was not something I wanted. I was not going to see her put in danger like that again.

Mason slowly sat down, given no choice. "This is taken by force. It is not admissible in Court."

"I don't need it in Court."

"I don't want to say anything more." He was prepared to leave.

I stopped his guards, keeping them in place for as long as possible. "You don't really have much of a choice in the matter."

I went on questioning my former friend, appalled and discernibly shaken by what was said next. Alarm bells were ringing in my head. Bellamy was not going to like hearing what I had to tell her. The moment I was out of the coffee shop, I caught my breath, afraid I might pass out. I didn't want to believe that Bellamy might be so accurate about her assessment of Mason over the last month or so. I listened to him say the other names on his list, and who had given him the list, doing everything within my willpower not to reach across the small table, and choke the new life from him.

"No." Bellamy refused to believe me when I relayed the information I had recovered for her and Dimitri.

"It makes sense Bells." I returned. "The only person Mason Ashford despises more than Chris, is Jesse.' Informing my friend that her ex, who not so long ago had been Strigoi, had Jesse Zeklos on a short kill list, did not sit well.

"You need to get Jesse away from Court." Rose advised, and I was on her side. "Get him and Sophie on a plane back to the UK." She suggested, but Bellamy was smart too. She knew Mason well enough to see that if Jesse were in danger, sending him away publicly would bring more complications.

"If I put Jesse on a plane, and he leaves without me or Yuri, Mason will get suspicious. He will pull back." She was studying and planning. "I want to know if he still intends to hurt Jesse or Christian."

"There is one more thing babe." I had to tell her the worst of what I heard. "There was one more person on the short list Mason carried, possibly still carries."

"A third royal?" She was already so rigid with hostility and protectiveness. I feared what revealing this might do to her.

"The third is not a royal." I said. "It's not a Moroi at all. It's a…a Guardian."

"Who?"

Now it was not only Bellamy who sat riddled with complex emotions. I desperately wanted to fall to the floor in a ball, and disappear. How could this be our reality? How was it possible that we were having this discussion?

"You." I breathed out lightly. "You are on that list."

I gained appropriate reactions from both Rose and Dimitri, but Bellamy showed little emotion this time when faced by the idea that her name was on a Strigoi kill list.

"Are we surprised?" She questioned, but clearly Dimitri and Rose were surprised, and outraged. "He blames me. I fell in love with Christian. Strigoi embrace their grudges. I left the Academy early and became a Guardian after running away with Chris. In Mason's eyes, I have been the biggest enemy since St. Vladimir's."

"He has gathered information about you most of all since his return." I pointed out the conversations many of us have had with Mason, but I suspected it was not new information to Bellamy. "But, I'm not convinced that this is all about you, Jesse, and Christian."

"It's more." Dimitri confirmed as well. He too studied Bellamy's thought boards, focusing on one in particular. It held the names of people here at Court that Mason blamed for his trouble, the names that he used as catalysts for his decision. "You think Mason blames me." Dimitri stared at his name on that list.

"You don't think that he blames you?" Bellamy countered. I prepared to watch and listen to Dimitri Belikov attempt to argue anything at all with Bellamy Tverskaya. This could be amusing.

"He has been respectful and accepting of my help."

Bellamy shook her head. "No." She refuted. "He has been quiet and relatively passive and patient, biding his time. There is a difference. Have you not noticed the look in his eyes, or seen the adjustments in his body language when you are with him?"

None of us had noticed the changes in demeanor at the time, but upon reflection, could see that Mason held some resentment or animosity towards the Guardian who had only been trying to help him. All of this however was only bringing up more questions in need of answering.

The door opened again, and all four of us tensed until Shane walked inside of the secure space. Bellamy turned away, unwilling to go on fighting with our friend.

"I asked Shane to come back." Dimitri confessed that he was to blame for rows that might reignite. "He should hear what we now know for sure."

"Why am I here again?" Shane was prepared to exit the room upon seeing Bellamy's reaction.

"Because Mason is lying to us!" I found myself shouting, arguing Bellamy's position this turn around. "He is lying about why he is here; why he wanted to return."

"Not this again." Shane spun on his heels. "Our friend does not have ulterior motives for coming back to us." He did not willing to continue listening to the accusations lobbied against Mason, but the door remained blocked now.

"I wouldn't want to believe it either, except that I have been doing my homework since Vienna." Bellamy had to speak. She sounded both unyielding and beseeching, begging our friend to hear her out. "I was asked to look for any behavior shown by Mason that is out of the ordinary." Bellamy said, piquing even my interest. "I have seen and heard more than you all want to know. Mason being back is not just weird. It's multiverse weird. Stuff like this does not just happen out of the blue, years later."

Shane turned back to face Bellamy, appearing more calm but still curious and skeptical. "You were asked to do this?" His question was the same as mine, and it was time for Bellamy to come clean.

"I was contacted by Alicia Jordan and Lola Ivashkov while we were on mission in Vienna."

"Lola Ivashkov is one of the many at Court who are against Mason being brought back here." Shane was more aware of the difficulties between Moroi families these days, than he let on. He sat down with Bellamy as she too continued to divulge what information she had.

"Alicia has been reviewing surveillance of Mason for the last six weeks. She was not initially suspicious. There was nothing atypical about any of it until Mason's lack of appearances was called to her attention. He is not spotted in any surveillance except the footage we have from Dublin and now from Vienna. Mason has 'survived' this long in the shadows without ever being pinged by our security."

Now she was finally being heard, and pointing out the best bits of what she knew. Guardian security was some of the best in the world, and I knew this because I had helped develop pieces of it. We did not miss much, and not picking up someone like Mason was far more than unusual. It was impossible.

"Why? Why would he not want to be seen for so long?"

"I'm guessing he did not want any of us to know what he had done." Shane still had an explanation, defending the man we once knew. "Strigoi hide."

"Strigoi hide." Dimitri agreed with our friend. "But not like Mason did."

I could see Bellamy wanting to believe that he was also in agreement with her hypotheses, but I also knew that she knew better. She'd made some accurate fact based points, knowing the difference between Strigoi lore from Strigoi fact, but she was not yet close enough to convincing everyone.

 **BELLAMY**

I was going in circles with Shane. He had returned to hear the information gathered by Eddie, but the discussion was not going well at all. He was listening, but not hearing. Shane refuted any facts that we posed, continuing to protect Mason at all cost.

"You cannot haul him in and rake him over the coals simply because you are suspicious." He returned.

"We have probable cause." Rose informed, keeping her position at the door.

"Eddie met with Mason earlier." I went on to say. "Mason verified that there are three people he was instructed to kill. Christian, Jesse, and me."

Shane's eyes widened for a brief few seconds. He searched for more in my eyes, he looked to Dimitri with sympathy, and then back to me.

"You? Why would he want to kill you?"

"I'm a threat. But, that is not what matters. If he still intends on harming Moroi, Chris and Jesse are in danger. This Court is in danger. It is our responsibility to ensure the safety of everyone here at Court." Shane and I were close to fighting again, neither of us willing to back down yet.

Eddie was the bravest, willing to step in between us, forcing us to our separate corners.

"Lissa and the Councils have given Bellamy and Dimitri an hour to question Mason."

"You can't interrogate him over suspicious behavior." Shane repeated. "Mason is no longer a threat to anyone."

"If you think so," I wanted to step closer to Shane, held back by Eddie again, "you can join the Guardians who question Mason."

"Are we not going to interrogate him?" Dimitri was confused by my statement.

"No." I needed to explain my feelings on the matter. "Mason does not trust either of us. He absolutely won't talk to me, and I doubt he will be truthful with you either."

"That is why you should go in to see him Bellamy." Rose countered my argument. "You get under his skin. You can push him without saying much at all. I think he will talk to you. He won't want to, but you can unintentionally push him to answer your questions."

"Rose is right." Shane submitted. "He may not trust you, but Mason won't lie to you if pressed hard enough. You and I should interrogate him."

So, it would be me and Shane stepping into the interrogation room with Mason. After some arguments from me, a comment or two from Dimitri, it was settled. When I said Mason would not trust me enough to talk, I was not over-exaggerating. So, if I wanted him to say anything, I was going to need a new method of approach with him.

 **SHANE**

"Eddie tells me you think I'm up to no good."

I thought that she might go for his throat as soon as we walked into the spall and sparse interrogation room. Then again, I should've known better. I should've known Bellamy better. She was calm and pensive in a way that made her twenty times more lethal to anyone she viewed as an enemy. Mason was poking the wrong bear. I often admired her natural ability to appear collected, even as she stared into the face of danger. She had learned to fake patience in a way I never could. Bellamy refused to show anything but patience as she took the available chair across the small table from Mason. She was perfectly silent, never offering up her thoughts, her misguided suspicions, or otherwise. She studied our friend the same way that she studied any other prisoner of the Courts.

Mason clearly did not like being put under such a sharper microscope by Bellamy. As soon as she sat down, I watched him start to fidget and shift, as much as allowed. It was no secret that Bellamy had always made Mason Ashford nervous. Now however, he had reason to be nervous. According to his own admission, he posed a possible threat to her Moroi and others within the Court. Bellamy did not take the safety of Jesse Zeklos lightly. She and Jesse had developed an especially close friendship over the years, so pinging Bellamy's radar or threatening Jesse in any way was never the smartest way to get their attention.

"Are these handcuffs really necessary?" Mason squirmed and pulled. He'd been cuffed to the table by order of the Court Guardians.

I felt conflicted. On one hand, he was dhampir again, and brought back to us by the grace of the saints. On the other hand, I had to admit that Bellamy and Eddie had exposed some very damning points against Mason.

"You're under suspicion until after your trial." I answered. Mason eyed me as though I were now betraying him in some way. Was I with him or against him? I didn't know.

"Cuffed or not," Bellamy finally spoke, "I'm not concerned about you threatening me." She was still unyielding. "You couldn't hurt me back at St. Vladimir's, and you can't now."

"Well," We both watched Mason lean forward, confident in his own victory, "you're half right."

I saw Bellamy shift subtly. She took in a shaky breath. My friend was strong, but whatever she saw in Mason as he returned fire, made her react.

"Jess." She spoke his name, and in the strange silence of Mason's confirmation, neither of us could deny that there was more to his motives than initially seen or heard. I soon saw what Bellamy saw. I saw it in his eyes. Everything that he had been concealing became visible to me.

"She's right." I heard myself say out loud. Bellamy had been right about him. "This was your plan." I put the pieces together. "You preyed on our weakness. You _need_ to be here. Why?" I really thought that I would go for his throat myself, if not for the restraint of my friend. Bellamy put a hand to my arm, stopping any attack.

"What do you have against Dimitri Belikov? Why do you hate him?"

Mason tried to disguise the blow Bellamy threw at him, but his control was nowhere near what hers was. I could see him secretly trying to unravel how or when she had noticed him showing any animosity towards Guardian Belikov.

"Wh…What are you talking about? I don't…"

"Is it because he married Rose?"

I saw him twitch. Bellamy was purposely agitating him. I recalled Rose mentioning that Bellamy held the unintentional ability to push Mason into talking, even if he didn't want to. And he was barely holding it together.

"Maybe it's because she chose to be with him long before you ever gathered the minute amount of courage to…"

Bellamy stopped abruptly while Mason turned red with anger. "I apologize." She knew what she was doing. "This conversation is not about you and Rose. It's not even about you and me this time."

"It's not?" Mason was doubtful of her statements.

"This is about you." Bellamy was beginning to sound equally as provoking as Mason. "I want to talk about you and Jesse."

"Your Moroi?"

"Let's you and I clear one thing up right now." Her tone turned serious. "No one gets to Jesse without going through me first. It has never turned out well for those who have tried."

I turned away from Mason, needing a break. He was not the same man I had grown up with at the Academy. He was not the same joking fun-loving person we all knew back then. Being Strigoi had changed him in unexpected ways. Bellamy continued to to dare him to come after her Moroi in any way. She dared him to even breathe near her most protected asset, and so did I for that matter. I turned back, paying more attention to Bellamy than Mason now.

I saw it briefly, and I wondered if I was just looking for trouble. I wondered if Bellamy too caught the fleeting look in Mason's eyes. It scared me, and it made me angry. By the end of our hour with Mason, I had come to the worst conclusions, and realized some of my worst fears. I'd seen and heard the most vile sides of a man who was one the most docile and trusted of us all. The door opened as soon as Bellamy motioned for Guardians to enter the room. She looked exhausted and sad. I knew the place inside where all of that sadness stemmed from.

"We should go." I offered my hand to her as she stood. She took it only as Mason and his guards moved by us, exiting the room. "He has a plan Bells. It's not good. I saw it in his eyes."

Bellamy stayed silent again, contemplating. I assumed that she was reviewing everything she too had just learned. Her head shook back and forth as she made sense of it all.

"Eddie and Chris have both claimed to spot my tell. It's my eyes. I don't hide my emotions well." It was true. Bellamy wore many of her emotions on her sleeve, and her face. "Mason's tell is that he has no poker face. Never has."

"I'm sorry I didn't believe you Bells." I apologized to my friend for my own behavior. "I'm sorry I didn't see it sooner. I…"

"You wanted to see him for who he was." She squeezed my hand gently. "You wanted to believe in the past. So did I." She twisted around, and I put my arms around her. She buried her face into me as I embraced her, holding her tight as others entered the small room, joining into the details of Mason's interrogation.

"He won't hurt you Bellamy." I assured her. She backed away, smiling. "What will you do now?"

"About what?"

"About Jesse. Christian." I mentioned. "Are they safe here at Court?"

"They are safe here.' Dimitri Belikov came to stand beside Bellamy as well, reassuring her. "The Councils have agreed to postpone Mason's trial date."

He informed us, explaining the latest in Guardian news.

Bellamy looked enraged. "Postponed? How long?"

"They did not give an exact amount of time." Dimitri then whispered something more in Bellamy's ear, causing her to pull him off to the side, arguing with him as Eddie and Rose joined me, both helping me to cope with everything we all just listened to Mason say.

After coming to terms with whatever we might or might not be up against, I returned home to Aaron's private apartments. The lights were on, which meant that he was awake, preparing for the night. But before anything else, Aaron and I needed to talk, Guardian to Moroi.


End file.
